《Unspoken Poetry》if i die.
Advertisement
if i die
Monday, March 5 2018
Im finally writing a death letter, ive been planning this since depression became my bed,anxiety become my pillow and insecurity became my blanket.
Gabi-gabi. Tuwing gabi ako kinakamusta ng mga kaibigan ko. Tuwing gabi lagi ko silang kasama, sila kausap ko, sila yung mga naging kaibigan. Dahil tuwing gabi pinapaalala nila sakin na wala akong kwenta, wala akong silbi, ang panget ko, ang taba ko, wala akong mararating, wala akong patitunguhan. Gabi gabi pinapaalala nila sakin ung mga bagay na yun.
Noong una, kaya ko pa. Okay pa ako.
Pero ngayon, hindi na.
Pagod na ako, sawa na ako, suko na ako.
Ayoko na.
Di ko na kaya.
Hindi ko na alam.
Paano ako mag sisimula ulit?
Kung gusto ko ng taposin.
Gusto ko ng mamatay, hinihiling ko na pag pikit ko ng aking mata ngayong gabi ay hindi na ito didilat pang muli, sa gayon hindi ko na masilayan ang mga matang ito sa salamin at makita ang babaeng madaming tinatago sa bawat pag ngiti at pag tawa.
Kaya ko to sinusulat dahil sana mamamatay na ako ngayon. Ang tanga, oo. Alam ko. Pero pagod na ako, kaya magpapaka tanga na ako.
Kailan man di ko natutunan mahalin ang sarili ko, bata palang ay namulat na ako sa mga bagay na hindi dapat. bata palang ay naipamukha na sa akin na hindi dapat ako matuwa kung ano ang physical kung anyo, bata palang ako natapakan na kung anong gusto ko. Bata hanggang ngayon.
Gusto ko na mag pahinga, pasensya na.
Mamatay man ako sa isang aksidente o sa aking sariling kamay, ginusto ko yun.
Mama, papa. Madami akong gustong sabihin, madaming pagkakataon na gusto kong sabihin na hindi ko kaya, na hindi ko alam kung kakayanin ko yung hinihiling nyo,na pasensya na hindi ako ganon kagaling, madami mama, papa.
Advertisement
Gusto ko sabihin na mahal ko talaga ang arts. Pero dahil sa inyo, dahil sa pag duda nyo, dahil sa pag ka wala nyo ng interest. Nawala din yung akin.
Hindi ako galit, malungkot lang.
Malungkot ako kasi hindi tayo magkalapit sa isat isa. Ang layo layo natin ma, pa. para tayong indibidwal na nakatira sa iisang bahay, para tayong panilya dahil sa apelyedo lang.
Ang dami kong hinanakit.
Ang dami kong gustong sabihin.
Ang dami kong gustong ipagtapat.
Pero
Ano bang mangyayari? Wala.
Mahal ko kayo.
Pero pasensya na, pagod na talaga ako.
Advertisement
- In Serial92 Chapters
Meek
After failing as an apprentice cooper and a town guard, Eli finds his place at the Rockbridge archives. Sure, he's the oldest 'junior scribe,' but he likes the job. And he's good at it, too. Then he completes an apparently-insignificant project, and the brutal reaction shocks him--with consequences that eventually shake the world. Eli gains powers. Rare and inhuman abilities. He progresses slowly, steadily, and not without setbacks. He changes, too. Is he a hero, a villain, a human, a monster? Depends who you ask. Meek is an epic fantasy with elements of progression. The basic magic is simple: five Paths, each with a different powerset. However, complexity arises from combinations, and the protagonist wields a magic all his own. Meek is set in the Valley, the only (as far as anyone knows) human empire that survived a Final Battle against a terrible foe. The Valley is warded against infiltration, but the enemy learned how to warp human souls, to foment discord within. However, another soul is also ... changed. Perhaps even 'warped.' And that soul is starting on a long (long, long) path that might, one day, prove that the Final Battle wasn't so final after all.
8 281 - In Serial419 Chapters
The Last Science [SE]
[SE has the same content as the original story, split into smaller chunks for easier reading. This story is on a temporary hiatus due to the ongoing COVID-19 pandemic. I work in healthcare and unfortunately no longer have the freetime to continue posting on a regular basis. As soon as our workload decreases, I will return. Thanks for reading! 💙] No one ever knows the whole story. Deep in the forests of the Pacific Northwest, the fading town of Rallsburg stumbles upon an amazing discovery—magic itself. Faced with potentially world-shattering power, the people of Rallsburg keep the secret for themselves. Led by Rachel DuValle, a perpetually underestimated college student with grand ambitions, they seek to found a new society. The world beyond suspects nothing, but magic cannot stay hidden forever. A train arrives in Rallsburg carrying Alden Bensen, a directionless high school graduate. To him, magic could represent meaning for his life, an explanation for his empty existence. This potent force offers anyone the power to change humanity forever—or send it cascading into swift and total annihilation. The Last Science is an ongoing science-fiction / low-fantasy web novel series, focused on the modern world with a twist. New societies bud and grow, but the people who make them up are imperfect and flawed. The story includes elements of mystery, action, crime, interpersonal drama, relationships, philosophy, sociology, politics, and much more, all centered on the perspective characters driving the tale. This is the "Scraps Edition" of the story, where the chapters have been split up into bite-size chunks (roughly 1500-3000 words), for your convenience. The prose has been edited from its original form, with some improvements, but there are no content differences from the original. New chapters will be posted throughout each week starting on Friday and appearing on multiple days thereafter, depending on the length of the chapter. Content Warning (by request): This series delves into some topics and situations which may be upsetting for some readers. In American rating parlance, the narrative would be rated PG-13 (except for language), but some have noted the story can get pretty dark on occasion. Please use your best judgment, and don't be afraid to take breaks and come back later. I'll still be here! [Discord] - come hang out and chat! [Patreon] - writing blog, epub copies, advance chapters and other goodies Need more to read? Check out my finished novel, Epilogue — a post-fantasy psychodrama.
8 122 - In Serial6 Chapters
Encroaching Darkness
Ashford Meyers used to be a general practitioner, living out his days in peace while he expanded on his hobbies. This all came crashing down when the world changed. Creatures from myths came out of the ether to wreak havoc on the world. He uses his smarts and additional powers from the system to create a place for the remnants of humanity to flock to. He starts training those who want to protect the weak in this new world until everything changes with the arrival of the outworlders. So, this fiction is something that I have been working on for a few weeks, and as such, I have about 75 pages already pending. On another note, chapters will be released every week on Monday and Friday, 8:00 am EST.
8 276 - In Serial15 Chapters
The Polyglot's Rune
Fear. Regret. Memories. They all flashed before my eyes as my life began to fade away. I felt a darkness encroach upon my heart followed by a sinister foreboding. Within that moment I was asked a single question by a powerful, mystical being. “Brave being, do you wish to accomplish a great deed in your life?” “No,” I refused, but the voice did not listen. It summoned me to its world only to try to have me slaughtered. But then, I was saved by him, the princess who disguised herself as a man. He was hellbent on revenge, and he was determined to drag me down with him. This story is meant to be a bit of a mix of genres and cultures, so there are some elements that may seem xianxia like, but it's not exactly the same so I didn't tag it. It also has multiple lead characters but is written in first person. Schedule: Dropped Normal Chapter Length: approximately 3000 words Warning: Tagged [15+] for Strong Language and Violence (Gore and Profanity aren't very prevalent, but I added the warning tags just in case).
8 130 - In Serial21 Chapters
Nano Mage
Like always a young man wakes up to the rhythmic ticking of his clock, but the clock stops ticking suddenly. He hears voices, and after a sudden pain in his gut, he falls unconscious.Upon waking up he has been blindfolded, and is currently being marched somewhere. Nearly a month later and he understands a few key points. 1 He is a test subject for a prototype of nanobots. 2 These bastards are cruel as fuck. 3 He his not the only subject. 4 It seems impossible for him to expect a rescue effort. And finally 5 He Likely does not have long to live. In another world a young mage is on the verge of mastering his spatial magic. “Just one more push and…” A thunderous noise causes the nearby village to vibrate. Where the mage once stood, a black mist is swirling about. That same black mist is now coated around the kidnappers. In a chair a young man sits. The mage can see the man’s clouded over expression, and assumes he is being mind controlled with magic. (Only one thing to due! Saved him!)
8 167 - In Serial27 Chapters
hold me till dawn ⤷ style
[lowercase intended]"they say i am a liar. they say i am weak. and i will do it to protect someone i care."in which were kyle and stan sends letters to each other but it turns out to be something else.. . .c o p y r i g h t s.story : @-peiskoscharacters : South ParkLoad of editing !completed: [ 1 - June - 2018 ]. . .angst warning
8 198
Prev Chap
Next Chap
Chap List
Boy
Girl
