We lay together in the hammock with Ari nestled in the crook of my arm. I flip through the pages of Romeo and Juliet with my free hand and read out loud. She clings to the front of my shirt and has wrapped herself in my flannel shirt, leaving me exposed to the summer sun. My arm fell asleep hours ago, but I can't bring myself to move it from under her.

Ari had a few episodes where my reading wasn't able to hold her attention, and she broke down in tears over the loss of Nonna. The first time, I dropped the book and held her until the wave of emotions subsided. Now, I read through her sobs, holding her tight and hoping I'll pull her back into the story, leaving reality behind for a bit.

I have never felt so utterly powerless before. If there's a magic cure-all for her hurt, I will go to any extent to obtain it for her. It tears me apart to see her like this. I should have been prepared for this moment. Looking back, her grandmother insinuated several times something was going to happen, and Ari would need me. I just didn't expect it to be Nonna's death and that it would affect me so profoundly. This is one of the hardest things I have ever done, and I'm trying to be strong for Ari.

I did my best to sound nonchalant when I told her I panicked last night when I couldn't find her, but the truth is I freaked out. I put everything at a standstill as I tore back through the stadium looking for her. Yelling for her at the top of my lungs, I ran down the hallways until someone notified Mike. He found me and explained Ari had left due to a death in the family. I quickly pieced everything together and knew Nonna was gone.

I hijacked a cab waiting for a fan to emerge from the stadium and paid him double to take me to the airport. Thankfully, the terminals were mostly empty due to the late hour, and I found a redeye flight to San Francisco. I called her brother before the plane took off and got directions to their house. Nicky and her father met me at the front door when I arrived. Both were in terrible shape with red-rimmed eyes and fatigued. They told me to follow a small path through their backyard which led to the cottage.

The door was unlocked, so I walked in. I left my belongings on the kitchen counter and searched the house for her. Her family warned me I might have to hunt her down in the forest between their homes. I ended up weaving between the thick trunks of the Redwood trees looking for her. At some point, I realized I had the copy of Romeo and Juliet in my hand. I don't even remember picking it up, and I'm not sure what I planned on doing with it in the dark. With a tight grip on the book, I wandered around for at least thirty minutes until I found her in the small clearing of trees asleep in the hammock. She looked so tiny surrounded by the massive trees with just a sliver of light from the moon illuminating her face in a pale hue.

Trying my best not to wake her up, I tiptoed over to see the letter her grandmother wrote hanging in her hand. I eased it from her grasp and folded it back into the envelope without reading one word. It was hers, and she would share it with me when she was ready.

The chilly breeze blowing through the brush caused her body to shiver, so I took off my shirt and wrapped it around us as I gathered her in my arms to protect her from the chilled night.

I read to her until the sun shines down on us through the opening of the trees above, and the heat becomes intolerable. Without a word, I place the letter safely inside the book and we walk back to the small log cabin. We take turns cleaning up and getting dressed, and when I return to the kitchen, I find her staring at my belongings on the counter. She has my motorcycle helmet in her hand examining it.

I smile at the sight of her. The job she does requires her to crawl under the stage and fasten all the pieces together rain or shine. I have seen her at what she would most likely consider her worst; today tops her most hectic day at work. Purple bags surround her eyes, and she piled her chestnut hair on top of her head in an absolute mess. She's changed into a pair of leggings and an old band tee littered with small holes drapes off her shoulder. She's the most beautiful girl I have ever seen.

"I didn't want to be trapped in a car last night, so I rented a motorcycle."

Ari jumps, drops the helmet on the counter, and asks, "How did you pull that off in the middle of the night? I'm pretty sure they don't rent motorcycles out at the airport."

I lean my hip on the counter and place a hand in the pocket in my jeans. There is still an air of sadness around her, but I'm unable to help myself from finding her amusing as she moves through the kitchen.

"I rarely use my status to break the rules but last night was an exception. I needed the fresh air and the feeling of being free," I explain.

Ari rummages through the cupboards, pulling out a few pans and placing them on the stove. "I can understand that."

"Do you want help?"

She shakes her head and takes several items out of the refrigerator before moving on to the pantry.

"Ari, it's just you and me, sweetheart. I don't think I'm going to be able to eat all that." I tease.

Stopping in her tracks, she says, "I need you to get my dad and brother. They need to eat too."

I should have known better; she's one of the most selfless people I know. Her family and the well-being of others come before herself.

I swallow the lump in my throat, realizing I won't have her to myself today. All these different scenarios had played through my mind last night, and every single one of them was just the two of us. Never had I considered she would need only her family, or even worse, she would wish I wasn't here. I had just assumed this was what I was supposed to do.

"Do you want me to go? I can come back later if you want." I run my fingers through my hair.

Stirring a bowl of pancake mix, she says, "No, I need you to stay, but I also need you to get them, okay?"

"Yeah." God, I feel like an asshole right now. I just can't figure out what I'm supposed to do.