《Intoxicated》Chapter 23
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CARTER POV
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I wasn't happy how the convo ended but, at the time, I just wanted to hold him as close as possible and feel safe in his arms. He gave me that without any questions.
It wasn't something that needed to be talked about right? But could I just drop it? Could I just smile in his face with these thoughts about the future practically screaming for me to not ignore it?
His arm tighten around me but, he was still sleeping while I was wide awake still thinking about the dream. Still feeling heartache, shock as if it was real. Don't think I would ever forget it. It was too vivid, it was too real.
I sighed and In the blink of an eye, I was on my back with him laying on me smiling.
My eyes went wide looking up to his beautiful face looking down at me. He smirked licking his lips then leaned down kissing my neck gently. I closed my eyes smiling as a low moan slipped out already feeling the heat rising "Morning love" he whispered against my lips and I giggled "Morning" I breathed out watching him as my finger gently ran up his bare chest stopping at his biceps.
He moved to my lips gently kissing them before pulling away to look at me smirking "Were you seriously going to lay here while I slept?" he asked confused and I just nodded. "You know I don't mind laying with you. You look tired anyway" I whispered sensing the uneasiness in him.
He rolled his eyes laughing and kissed my jawline "I was but, I know what will definitely wake me up" he said going back to my ear. I moaned as his tongue traced my ear. Ughh as much as I wanted to, we couldn't.
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We needed to talk.
"Can't right now. We need to talk" I whispered shaking my head. He pouted whining and I giggled pushing him back till I was sitting up and he sat down. I didn't know any other way to go about this subject so I was just going to ask him straight up.
"What's going on?" He asked grabbing my thighs and pulling me closer smiling and I sighed knowing this little bit of happiness we had could disappear any second.
"Umm... I want you to answer this honestly" I whispered and he nodded starting to get a bit serious. He could sense my nervousness "If... something were to... happen to you, what would you expect me to do?" I asked waiting for a response for a bit.
I could tell he was taken back by the question. He was trying to figure out where this was going "Like what?" "If you were...to die" I whispered looking down nervously playing with my fingers.
"I expect you to move on" he said instantly.
"What do you mean by move on?" "I expect you to continue living and try to find love again. It would be easy for you" he simply stated. I expected that answer from him, as if it was no big deal.
"What if I couldn't?" "You can" he reassured and I shook my head. Now that Cameron has entered my life, I didn't want to see a life without him. Who would want to when they were in love with?
"I wouldn't want to" I whispered and his face went hard instantly. I know me losing him was very slim. But, it could happen. Vampires are immortal but, can be killed. I've seen him do it twice.
"Why not" he demanded making me a bit nervous. The anger from him was hitting me like a truck. Never seen him so pissed even in the beginning, I was actually a bit nervous.
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"I- I don't want to live without you" I whispered out then bit my lip looking down as my eyes watered a bit. I could tell he was pissed and trying to control himself and talk to me calmly.
"But you can and that's what I want you to do. I want you to live Carter" I shook my head "But-" He instantly grabbed my face to look into his eyes. I didn't really need to look at him. Trust me, I knew where he stood on the subject.
"No" was all he said with hard eyes.
I bit my lips knowing this wouldn't make the situation any better but I had to ask "So if I were to die, would you move on?" I asked and he was silent as I waited for an answer.
"Is that what your dream was about?" I ignored that asking him again "If I were to die, would you move on?" "Carter why-" "Just answer-" "It doesn't-" "Cameron answer the question" I yelled feeling the pain in my neck but ignored it as best as I could. It hurt though, and I fucking hated it.
He stayed silent and it angered me with every second he didn't respond. Tears started to form and I pushed his hands away as I got off the bed heading towards the door quickly. I tried hurrying before they started to fall but, I couldn't control them.
I opened the door but it was quickly slammed back a second later. I closed my eyes taking a deep breath and his hand stayed on the door till I decided to turn. His head was down and he was breathing hard but the anger was being replaced with sadness.
With that, the tears were pouring. I couldn't deal with mine and his emotions at once. I didn't want to see him cry or be hurt like this. But it had to happen, it had to be talked about. That's what I kept reminding myself.
"You know the answer. I would do it in a heartbeat. If your heart was to stop beating this instant, the next second mine would too" He stated looking up with his face just as serious as before.
I shook my head instantly "I want you to move-" "I can't" he whispered. "Yes, you can just how you want me to. Promise me you will" I asked and he shook his head.
"I can't promise you that. I'm sorry" he whispered.
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