The rain had finally turned quiet, the air smelled like wet dirt and I managed to pass out on the couch. The last thing I remember doing was browsing through Netflix. A blanket was on top of me and somehow I didn't believe Gavin actually gave it to me when I blacked out.

I slowly sit up and see he's wide awake.

"Your awake." He says glancing at me. "I thought you died there for a second."

I could have. "Nope sadly I'm still alive." I say and it's meant to be a joke but it actually sounds very real.

"I didn't know whether to leave you there or take you to your room." He adds running his fingers through his wavy hair. I can tell it's a lot messier now and curlier than before and it's probably because we were in the rain. "Your drooling."

"Was not." I scoff. "I just thought your hair looked good." I finally say confidently.

Gavin's lips curve up into a smile like he can't believe I actually complimented him. I know, it was a new thing for me too. "It's pretty late."

I nod. "Yeah you can use this blanket if you'd like." I tell him standing up from the couch and handing him one of my favorite blankets. When he reaches for it I can feel are fingertips graze against each other's and the closer I do get I can smell something heavenly which always lingered in the air whenever Gavin was around.

I'm pretty sure he doesn't even wear cologned and just naturally smells good, I couldn't complain.

"Thanks." He smirks down at me. "Goodnight."

I smile at him and it feels right but it also feels weird because I'm always frowning. My face wasn't used to this. "Goodnight." I walk through the darkness of my house until I finally make it to my bedroom. I try to flip on the light switch but the power is still out.

The only light I had was coming from the moon peeking through my window. I rest my head on my pillow and close my eyes before falling into a deep slumber.

My eyes suddenly look into his green eyes that are intensely staring back into mine and he's smiling. It doesn't seem like a devious smile and I can't help but put my arms around his neck to bring him closer. Are lips are now only inches apart and the feeling in my stomach begins to grow.

His soft lips finally meet mine.

"Why'd you lie to me?" He says between kisses moving lower and lower to my chest.

"What?" I said taking in a large breath.

He pulls away and again, those green eyes are staring at me. "I would have never gave you a second glance if it wasn't for the cancer." He chuckles and now that smile is a devious one. "Cmon I was practically forced to be friends with you, why would I ever be friends with you?"

My body sits up from my bed, sweat lingers on my forehead and my heart was racing. It was a dream, well more like a nightmare. I'm pretty sure my subconscious was telling me to stop lying or that I really wanted to make out with Gavin.

I grab my phone and look at the time it was a little passed eight and the sun was trying to force its way into my room. The birds were singing and the smell of wet dirt still lingered. As I get out of bed I head into the bathroom and stare at the hideous person in the mirror, me. Definitely sleep deprived once again.

As I start brushing my teeth I remember Gavin might still even be here and that my mother should be arriving home soon.

Other than that nightmare, last night wasn't as horrible as I imagined it'd be. I catch myself smiling like a complete idiot and instantly frown back at myself in the mirror. I didn't want to think about last night and I didn't want to think of Gavin as anything other than Gavin.

I walk downstairs quietly peeking around the corner but it's completely empty, no Gavin in sight. What did I expect waffles and eggs cooking in the kitchen? Unrealistic and I'm a complete moron.

I do find it weird that Gavin cleaned up the mess from last night. I know it's completely normal for someone to clean up after themselves and that I'm just trying to find and explanation for anything Gavin does. I look out the window and no red mustang was outside maybe he had an emergency to tend to?

Shortly after eating some organic cereal my mother walks in. She's holding a large briefcase and her purse in the other hand. "Hey, how did it go last night?"

I shrug and put my bowl in the sink. "It was fine."

"Glad to see you didn't throw a party in my absence." She says dropping everything from her hands and walking toward me. "How do you feel?"

"I feel how I feel everyday mother, sick." I drag, she gives me a look of disappointment and it makes me feel completely useless. I couldn't do anything instead I stay home and have a huge cloud forming over my head that seems to be getting larger.

I remember even when I was sick and in the worst pain possible I'd still enjoy the company of my mother. We'd laugh and watch movies all day long and now everyday that passes we keep growing apart rather than closer.

I was afraid I'd eventually push everyone away to the point where they'd stop coming around. Let's hope it doesn't come to that. "Did you kiss him in the rain?"

I scrunch up my nose at Peyton's reply. "No, it wasn't romantic the thunder was loud and the lightning could have killed us." I laugh out loud at the thought mainly because I would have never imagined myself standing in a storm in the middle of the night with Gavin. I guess there's a first time for everything.

"Your moms so cool." Peyton pouts her lip at me. "My dad doesn't let any boys step foot in the house well except for Ash."

"Yeah because you told him I wasn't straight." Ash reminds her.

"Yes because we needed to get that school project done and that was all I could think of at the time."

"Okay well who's up for a movie marathon?" I said trying my best to change the subject.

"Actually Zach was talking to me today and he asked about you." Peyton adds. I turn my head to listen and I'm reminded of the horrible date I had with him. "He wanted me to tell you his phone lost most of his contacts so I gave him your number again."

That explains the sudden hiatus. I thought he just never wanted to speak to me again and that was understandable. "That's kind of a relief." I tell her.

"Wait there's more-" she grins. "Beckham is throwing a party tonight and he invited us."

"I hate parties." I grown out loud collapsing on my bed. "Not tonight Peyton."

"Zach wanted you to come, but I know, it's okay." She says understandably. She takes a seat at my desk and gives me a sympathetic smile. Why did I feel bad whenever my friends wanted to experience their final high school moments with me? I felt like I was keeping them hostages with me and at first I thought parties were enjoyable until I actually experienced one.

Peyton and Ash were always there for me, why couldn't I try to warm up to things they enjoyed too?

"Don't look at her like that." Ash tells Peyton. "She's thinking about it now, I know that face."

"Okay." I said. "I'll go to the party, but not for Zach for you guys."

"What I wanted to stay for the movie marathon?" Ash says.

"We can do that next weekend." I say. "Now, Peyton help me get ready?"

I felt like my hair was being tugged in many different directions. Hairspray coated my head and makeup coated my face. Once Peyton spun me around to face the mirror I imagined myself looking somewhat like a clown. But the makeup was perfect and my hair was just more fuller looking than how it usually looks and I didn't look like a clown.

I wanted light makeup which Peyton took into consideration like she did last time. My features just seemed more enhanced.

As we browsed my closet Peyton grabbed a pair of ripped jeans and a cute top to pair it with. I'm glad I didn't have to wear a dress again.

"Cute but casual." Peyton says officially proud with what she's pulled together. "This is definitely more you."

I nod in agreement. "My moms probably past out from all the wine so we can just go." I tell them, I can see by the expressions on their faces they knew something was going on between my mother and I. My mother never got to the point where she's passed out until recently.

We get into Ash's car and turn up the music, we sing until are lungs can't handle anymore and finally arrive to the party. This party was located further up a mountain and was practically in the middle of nowhere. Trees surround the house which was quite large.

I stuff my hands into my jacket and followed my friends inside. The loud music made my ears ring and I choked on a cloud of smoke someone blew in my face.

"You made it." I recognize Beckham as he pulls Peyton in for a hug which she denies. "Hey Alex Zach's in the kitchen if you want to say hi." I don't say anything but stand there in my own awkward silence.

"So Peyton do you want to dance?" Beckham adds.

"Actually I'd love to." She smiles. "You guys lets go." She looks at Ash and I and I can just see the color draining from Beckham's face from embarrassment. "Or wait you should go say hi to Zach and meet us on the dance floor."

Before I can protest Peyton takes Ash into the crowd and I'm left with Beckham. "Damn, I like her."

I laugh lightly before walking past him and multiple people standing in the middle of the room. Once I turn another corner I'm led into a large kitchen where people are serving drinks. I

notice Zach right away because he's much taller than everyone else in the room so I make my way towards him.

"Hey." I say looking up at him. His body turns to face me and his lips instantly turn up into a smile.

"Hey did Peyton tell you?"

I nod my head. "I was starting to think I ruined the whole date." I admit.

"No of course not, I've been through worse." He chuckles.

"What are you drinking?" I ask pointing to his red cup.

"Just some cheap beer do you want some?" He asks, cheap beer didn't sound too pleasant. I've never really drank alcohol and I'm afraid I'd probably be a light weight and humiliate myself.

"Sure." I say.

Zach grabs another cup and pours a can inside it before handing it to me. I smell it and it smells sorta disgusting. I'm not sure why kids enjoy this? I take the cup to my lips and have a small drink, yep definitely disgusting but I'm guessing it should eventually taste better?

"Everyone was talking about us, I saw the video from are date." He says over the loud music.

"Yeah I saw it too." I nod my head.

"There just jealous y'know?" He looks down at me with his dark brown eyes. "Because you look beautiful tonight."

I'm hoping Zach wasn't drunk and just telling me all of this to please me. The other part of me enjoyed his compliments and I should just shut up.

I feel his arm wrap around me and my body goes entirely numb.