The birds are chirping. The sun is out. This Friday morning couldn't have been better, well except for the fact that I woke up asleep on my floor. My thoughts haunted me at the remembrance of Gavin seeing me stalk him through the window. Then he saw me fall and never get back up?

I rub my head as I sit up groaning from the horrible pain I'm in. "Sweetheart what are you doing on the floor?" My mother laughs softly. "Your room is a mess." She begins picking up all the loose clothing from the ground.

"Tell me about it." I mutter finally getting up on my feet. My head feels a little fuzzy for a moment until I swallow my daily dose down with a glass of water. My life was like clockwork.

"Sara and I are gonna head out for some drinks after work, you don't mind do you?" My mom says.

Sara Cambridge, Gavin's mother and my mother's longtime friend. They've been working together for a few years now and considering they also live beside each other the two were best friends. Even if those two were friends Gavin and I certainly were not.

I guess he didn't want to associate with someone like me and I definitely wanted nothing to do with him. I was better off looking at him through my window and nothing else.

I shook my head. "Go have your fun." I tell her. I'll be fine by myself for the night."

She gives me a warm smile. "Okay."

As I eat the smallest portion of eggs I can hear my mother's car pulling out of the driveway on her way to work. Just another lonely day to spend. I got on my laptop, finishing up some lessons online. Yes I'm homeschooled, it has it's pros and cons. The best thing about it is the fact that I don't have to be pressured into trying to fit in, even if I wish I could.

Around three pm my friends showed up at my house. Most Friday nights we watch as many Netflix movies we can fit in before curfew and by curfew I mean Ash's curfew. His parents are pretty strict.

"Moms staying out late." I told Peyton. Her eyes light up as she collapses on the couch beside me. "But you know what happened last time."

The last time we tried sneaking out of the house we unfortunately got caught. My mom went on this huge lecture about all the things that could have gone wrong. Trust me I know all the risks, I could die. Leukemia causes your immune system to be very weak so I easily get sick. If I go to that party tonight and someone is sick, I'll get sick. It's inevitable.

"I think you should just stay home." Ash adds in giving me a warm smile.

I roll my eyes. "I'm sick of being in this house." No pun intended. "Can't I be a normal teen for once?"

"I don't know about this." Ash shakes his head in disagreement.

"It's up to you Alex. This could be your chance." Peyton says. "No pressure."

I switched glances between Peyton and Ash who had different opinions about this. Four years, it's been four years since I've been anywhere but the damn hospital or doctors office. I wanted to see and feel the world again I didn't want to be trapped in my own body.

"Let's go get ready." I told Peyton. "I'm not staying here tonight."

The three of us head upstairs into my bedroom where Peyton started browsing through my wardrobe. "You clearly haven't gone shopping in years." She teases pulling out and old band tee. "Where are all the crop tops or tight dresses?"

I start laughing. "Check my mother's closet."

"Okay then. I'll be right back."

I look over at Ash who's shaking his head in disapproval. I playfully grab a pillow and hit him a few times with it. "It'll be fun."

"Your mother's gonna kill me if she finds out about this." He sighs.

"She won't." I said, Peyton enters the room like she's just seen a ghost.

"Try this on?" She says giving me a red dress. My mouth opens and I can't even find the words to speak. What was this tiny thing doing in my mother's closet? I shake the thoughts from my head and go inside my bathroom. I look at myself in the mirror for a split second but it's enough for me to see my body. In my early stages of cancer I had a tube inserted and the scar was left behind. It's hard to see sometimes, I wasn't comfortable with my body.

I continue getting dressed walking out once I get all the zippers and things adjusted. "Holy shit." Peyton says. "Let's get your makeup and hair finished."

With all of Peyton's magical work she was eventually finished a few hours later. I turned to see myself in the mirror astonished by what I had seen.

"My work here is done." Peyton adds patting herself on the back.

"Thanks Peyton." I said. Ash still wasn't sure about this I could tell by the nervous look on his face. "I'll be fine." I tell Ash before I followed Peyton downstairs.

We walked outside and I stopped for a moment really taking in this moment. "You coming missy?" Peyton called from Ash's car. I took my seat on the passengers side before we head down the road to the party.

I peek my head closer to the window as we approached the crowded neighborhood. Cars lined the streets my ears buzzed as I heard the loud music coming from the large house ahead.

The car came to a halt and I became eager to get inside. "She looks amazing doesn't she?" Peyton told Ash as she wrapped her arm around my shoulder.

"Amazing." Ash chuckled softly. "Let's go."

I could feel my heart beating faster and faster as I became more uncomfortable. People stood in the front yard watching my every move. The music was getting louder with every step and once we entered I felt everyone staring. I stood closer to my friends and gulped down my dry throat.

"Who is she?"

I could hear girls talking as we brushed through the crowd.

"Should we get some drinks?" Peyton shouted over the music. I nodded my head wanting to get away from the crowd of people. We reached a kitchen but the large crowds didn't seem to end. So this was a high school party? A humid, smelly party? Nothing like the movies.

"One for you. One for you."

I took the small plastic cup in my hands looking down at the clear liquid inside. "What is it?" I asked.

"I don't know?" Peyton shrugs.

"Your not gonna drink that are you?" Ash asks me.

I shrugged. "It's a party right?"

"Alex."

"Stop being such a party pooper." With that I took the first shot of the night. It felt like pure acid dripping down my throat.

"You realize your medication is not to be mixed with alcohol?" Ash reminds me. Great now he tells me?

"Hey let's go dance." Peyton says grabbing my arm, she drags me along to the dance floor where people are grinding and making out. "Just flow with the music." Peyton says swaying her body around.

I feel to awkward to do any of that. I stand there watching everyone around me almost in a trance, they're having fun. Why am I not? "Alex?"

I shook my head. "Sorry I just, I can't dance." I told her.

"Sure you can." Someone says wrapping their arms around me from behind. They start moving closer so I look up to see a boy smiling down at me.

"Get out of here Stewart." Peyton shouts over the music to him. I try wiggling myself out of his hold but again, I'm weak.

"Make me Peyton." I can hear him laughing in my ear. Peyton knows it's never a good idea to play tug of war with me. I'll be the one who ends up losing.

"What's going on here?" A deeper voice says. Stewart finally lets me go and I go over to Peyton to see Zach Miles hovering over the guy.

Zach Miles, he was the second quarterback for the football team and also very attractive. It's crazy how stupid hot some of the boys get after middle school. I'm still waiting for my glow up.

"We were just dancing." Stewart says laughing it off.

"Are you okay?" Peyton asks. I nod my head at her.

"Get out." Zach says to the guy. Wait, is this his house?

"You girls alright?" He says turning to look at us.

"We're fine." Peyton says. "Right Alex?"

I nodded my head watching his tall figure tower over me. "Good, do I know you?" He asks me. "You just seem really familiar."

"No." I said. "I get that a lot though."

Zach's lips curve up into a smile before we get interrupted. "We got a problem." Another guy says. "Gav-"

"Watch where you're going next time!" The voice echoes through the house and it sounds very terrifying. Zach turns around and heads down the hallway where most of the crowd has drawn into now that it pulls me and Peyton along.

Peyton and I are suddenly standing in front of the crowd which is circling around Gavin and another guy who's trembling with fear. "Gavin c'mon." Zach says trying to make him back off but we all know that's not easily done.

"It was and accident Gavin." The guy says, he's holding a cup and that's when I notice most of his drink is spilt onto Gavin's white shirt. The white shirt also causes it to stick to his body which reveals some of his abs. Yep the girls are definitely drooling.

"Then get the fuck out of here before I accidentally punch you." Gavin says holding him up by his collar. He releases the poor guy who stumbles back.

Zach pats Gavin on the back and everyone's just watching as Gavin pulls his shirt off. It's like a slow motion recap on repeat. He begins wiping his torso with his shirt. "Excuse me." The same boy who Gavin just terrified says before bumping straight into me. His drink falls straight onto my chest seeping into my dress. My jaw drops as I stare down at the smell of alcohol now on my body.

"I-I'm so sorry."

The boy is yanked back from me as Gavin tackles him to the ground beating him repulsively. It takes a moment before his friends get him off.

"Let's go." Peyton tells me.

I nodded as we headed through the crowd. "We need to find Ash." I said.

"I saw everything are you alright?" Ash says appearing out of nowhere.

"I'm fine, let's go." I said pushing him ahead of me.

"Hey!"

Is someone calling me? Don't look back. "Hey." I feel them grab onto my wrist and I wince a little at the touch. "I should have beaten his ass the second he said a word to me. Sorry about your dress."

I stay silent. I'm dreaming right? "I-I." Great I'm mumbling.

"Do I know you?" He says, we both just stare awkwardly at each other because I'm standing there like and idiot. "I'm Gavin."

"Alex." Peyton says. "We have to go."

Just like that I escaped the disastrous night feeling his eyes watch me as I made my way down the concrete steps.

Maybe Ash was right, I should have just stayed home.