The yelling. The chaos. The love of my life. The fear instilled in me, swallowed me whole in a dark inescapable abyss; I was already waist deep in it.

The last thing I remember, before this unexplainable sensation ran throughout my whole body, was (F/N). The way her messy hair frames her face. The way we made eye contact as her eyes were calling for me. Or the way her mouth was wide open screaming for me. Screaming my name.

"SUGA!"

A pop in my ears and I have lost one of my senses. It was soon before I'd lose all of them. My head was in a haze and I couldn't breathe. What was I feeling at that moment? Failure. I felt like a failure.

I'm sorry I failed you, (F/N).

Rin came stomping forward with her gun steaming. I could sense the anger in her heart. The bitterness from being interrupted again. A mild inconvenience that could be solved with a gun. A bullet was fired.

"STOP IT PLEASE! DON'T HURT HIM!" (F/N) screamed till her face turned red. Her neck veins popping out, with tears dampening her cheeks. Kunimi held onto her with all his might, as if interfering would cause more harm to her.

Hasn't she already been through enough. Life is so cruel. She doesn't deserve this. She deserves better.

I'm kneeling down in defeat with all the cords weighing me down. It was too heavy to carry.

It's cold, but what's this warmness I'm feeling?

Gazing down at my left arm, I notice a streak of blood soaking through my shirt. It drips slowly to the floor like a leaky faucet; each drop, a count down till the end.

A bullet was lodged into my arm; the pain was indescribable. I could feel the worry in (F/N)'s distraught face. The last set of eyes I gazed upon. The only ones I knew were my forever.

Rin raises her gun again as she trudges forward for a better aim. She loads her gun and a bone-chilling 'click' rattles my senses. Her dark eyes squinted menacingly as her lips formed into a snarl.

Is this how it ends?

~

I saw a big, bright light and an ethereal goddess staring down on me. Last thing I remember was being in the boiler room with my best friend. Where did we go wrong? Oh, that's right. We're stupid.

My eyes deceived me as I squinted upwards. I cough slightly and sigh from exhaustion. Rubbing the soot and ash from my face, I still couldn't believe my eyes. Kiyoko was standing above me, offering a hand.

"Am I in heaven?" I mumbled, only for the angel to giggle in response.

"Nope, but you've ran away just in the nick of time." she explained as the corners of her mouth lifted along with her beauty mark. Her shining blue eyes always found a way of making my heart flutter. Her beauty mark and the way her glasses rest upon the bridge of her nose was a work of art.

"Ah, Tanaka?" she asked, snapping me back to reality.

"Oh right! Sorry!"

I take her hand and she brings me upwards to my feet. I realized I passed out from the fumes but somehow I've made it out alive. She dusts off my clothes and I smile at her kind gesture. She didn't even need to talk and somehow I'd fall in love all over again. I realized she was still sick, and wondered how she made it here on her own. In fact, how did she get here in the first place?

Did Kiyoko save me?

"W-wait how did you get here? And where's Noya?"

She takes my arm and wraps it around her shoulder, aiding me to my feet. She wasn't too stable herself, so I forced my legs to be strong for her. This time, I didn't want to be a burden.

"My mom brought me here. And as for Noya... he went further into the mansion with the rest of the team. He told me to come get you here." she mumbled as we found a way out of the mansion.

Her mother? Wait a second...

"You remember me." I say it more as a statement than a question. She tilts her head sideways just so she can get a proper glance at me.

"Of course I do Tanaka. Why would I ever forget" she lets out a small laugh. It rang in my ears like a symphony.

Ever since the day she kissed me, I came over to her house just so the feeling of being forgotten would subside. Even if she'd forgotten herself, I wanted to tell her I was here. Some days were more difficult than others but, to my surprise, she was looking for me and she remembered.

I will always fight for you, remember that Kiyoko.

Just then, I realized Noya was on his own. I felt guilty for not offering more help. Frantically, I ask,

"Noya left? But-"

"It's okay, you've done your part." she smiled meekly and I smile back at her. Her raven hair still shone the same way it did when she was in first year high school. Her reassurance in her voice always told me that I was going to be okay.

We are going to be okay.

"Well, I guess Noya can solve this ha?" I chuckle a bit and turn to her.

She giggles at the thought of the tiny boy running into the battlefield. I lean slightly on her and she holds me close.

"I suppose so"

~

"Why do you have to go?" Rin's voice trembled as she caught sight of her brother, leaving with a suitcase full of clothes and other possessions. It was the middle of the night, where he thought it was safe to escape. As if her twin telepathy ignited, she woke her up to find this awful sight. Her brother leaving for a girl.

"You'll understand someday when you fall in love" Tenma explained as he stumbled a bit with the suitcase, "It's complicated. Dad doesn't love her, nor will he ever."

"Why? Are you unhappy here? Here with me?That girl... she's dangerous Tenma! She's in a gang! Why... why would you involve yourself with someone like that?" her lips trembled as she couldn't fathom how she was feeling. Her brother was everything to her. Her inspiration. Her role model. It was different now.

"Because I love her Rin." He said with no hesitation.

Rin's eyes widened and Tenma placed his hands on her shoulders. She couldn't understand how irrational he was being.

"I'm sorry Rin. I'll keep in touch. I promise." he said as he disappeared into the dark.

He ventured off to be with the love of his life, but little did he know that he was also leaving behind Rin. It crushed her. And she couldn't speak a word to her father or else he would've never forgiven her. They'd send him right back home and he'd be miserable here. It wouldn't have benefited the both of them

Years past and something inside Rin burned with the desire to show her brother how much she's better off without him. He never knew that deep down all she wanted was to see him again. He never contacted her afterwards, and she seemed more of an afterthought. Forgotten.

She was a rich, successful business woman; however, success could only take her so far. She overworked herself, didn't have any family nor have the time to raise one. Even if she wanted one, she knew she couldn't. A horrible news struck her as the words "infertile" came out of the doctor's mouth; it shattered her heart. Work was her life and eventually it consumed her. Thinking her inheritance would be passed on to her but instead it went to Tenma. All her hard work for nothing. Her brother who left behind everything to be with a girl. A simple, poor and worthless girl. But this girl meant everything to him.

Now you can see why she was infuriated. She was left with nothing.

Enraged. I thought of people who have love and are capable of keeping it. As much as I wanted it, I knew I couldn't have it.

Seeing (F/N) being rescued from a boy. Him risking his life for her. A love that was so farfetched from what I could ever have.

Was there something I was lacking? Was there something wrong with me? Did I not deserve it?

As instinctive as my actions, I carelessly aim at the silver hair boy who held (F/N) closely to his chest. Kindaichi hits the boy in the leg, separating them.

I want you to feel my pain.

Tenma shoves my arm away and a bullet is fired. Hot tears welled in my eyes as I yelled,

"You're getting in the way! I don't need you!"

I steady my hands on the gun as it shakes uncontrollably.

"Rin, I'm sorry. I SAID I'M SORRY!" Tenma yelled. He wraps his arms around me and begs for mercy.

I dropped my gun and realize what I've done

I... I didn't mean to do that...

I grasp onto my hand to stop it from hurting any further. My breath was shaky and with each inhale, it was just too painful. I looked away in horror and regret. A deep pain settled in my chest, the same pain that I felt when he left. This time it lingered until it burned.

~

When can I find the time to breathe?

Kunimi was holding you down and the pain tore through your back, almost splitting you into two. The downpour of emotions jumbled around in your head, prying its way out of your throat.

It's happening again. The people that I love are in pain because of me. He's in pain. Because of me. It's all my fault.

Suga kneels down with his head hung low. His arm was bleeding out as Rin missed her shot.

Rin reloads her gun and fixes her aim to Suga's head.

"Time to end this" she sneered as she boldly held her finger over the trigger.

"SUGA NO!"

"ROOOOOLLING THUUUUUNDEEEEEER!!!!!" Nishinoya screamed

A thick fog filled the air, blinding you from your surroundings. You hear several footsteps invade the room as shadows dance around in your eyes. You escape Kumini's grasp as he coughs from the smoke. Crawling to the floor, you try to locate Suga.

Please be alive. PLEASE BE HERE!

A strong breeze entered the room and the sound of motorcycles roared in your ears. You couldn't even speak as your windpipe tightened. Blindly feeling around, you touch something slightly cold and slide yourself over.

"SUGA! I'M HERE!"

The fog slightly parted as you hover over him. He's bleeding out from the first bullet.

But where's the second one?

Searching his body all over with your fingertips, you realize there's no wounds. No other bullet holes beside his arm?

She shot straight at him! How is he okay? W-what happened?

"Thank God you're okay." you sobbed as you cupped the sides of his face. You lean forward and listen to his faint heartbeat, "I'm going to get you out of here."

Tearing off a piece of your nightgown, you press your shaky hands against his wound and tie it securely. Suga's eyes flutter for a second as he moans in discomfort.

"(F/N)... (F/N), I- I failed you." he whispered hoarsely only for you to hear. Your eyes dart rapidly back and forth from his wound to his hazel eyes. Your hands were stained with his blood as you hold pressure on the wound.

"No, Suga. Don't say such things. It's my fault you're her-"

He tugs on your shirt and notions his head slowly to the right.

"What's wrong? You're still bleeding! I-I'm trying to stop the bleeding." you sobbed uncontrollably. He moves his head back and forth, telling you to stop.

"I'm sorry, (F/N)"

Glancing at the direction he was gazing upon, you realize what he meant. Your eyes widen as a body lies still on the ground a few feet away.

"D-dad" you whimper.

His face was pale and his shirt was soaked in his own blood. He saved him. He saved Suga.

You wanted to scream, but nothing came out.

Watching my dad die for the first time was unbearable. Watching him die for the second time... it felt selfish. Selfish that he was taken from me, again. And all I did was sit back and watch him die over and over again.

You clung tighter to Suga's shirt and he gently places a hand on top of yours. Tears blurred your vision and you couldn't take this nightmare anymore. A figure hovers over you and you couldn't help but crouch lower to protect Suga.

"Don't hurt us anymore. Please" you sobbed into Suga's chest.

The figure crouched down and placed a gentle hand on your shoulder. They rubbed your back and you peer upwards.

"Mom." you whisper in disbelief.

"I'm here honey. You're safe." she said confidently. She pulled out her gun from her hoister and entered deeper into the fog. She was looking for Rin and your heart dropped into your stomach. Too fast for you to process, more motorcycles entered the room. A gaping whole was seen at the far side of the room. It was made from an explosion. You didn't know how or when it happened but it was all a blur to you.

"Find (F/N). She's somewhere here." a familiar voice commanded.

"Osu. Find Suga as well. He must be near too." another one added.

"The others should be here as well."

Kageyama? Hinata? Akaashi?

The fog lifted just slightly for you to see a rampant motion that made your head spin. You notice a flurry of yellow and blue bouncing up and down in the air. You focus your attention on Suga again, who had his eyes slightly open.

"Suga. Are you okay? We have to get out of here." you say frantically. He looks into your eyes and you couldn't really read his expression. Elated hazel eyes, glued onto yours for a moment. The eyes that spoke forever.

His head falls to the right as he slowly closes his eyes. He laid still for a moment and you were frozen in fear that he left you. Left you, alone. The air around you thickened, making it difficult to breathe.

"SUGA! SUGA STAY WITH ME!" you screamed.

His grasp falls as his hands loosen up in yours. His lips parted slightly with a small exhale escaping them. You inch closer to his face and you realize he isn't breathing. You tense up and instinctively, you put your hand over his heart. You clasp your hands together and pump firmly onto his chest. After a few rounds of CPR you press your lips against his in desperation and blow into his mouth. A mixture of tears and sweat came dripping down and you were so tired you wanted to give up. Your arms wobbled but you didn't stop. You couldn't stop, or you'd lose him.

Stay with me Suga! Stay with me!

------------ end pt. 55 ------------