hursday, 20th of December, 9:00 AM

It has been awhile since I last wrote in this, but that won't really stop me from updating on my so-called life.

The past two weeks weren't really that eventful- they were so eventful. Although, they passed quickly and I didn't have to deal with Jennie that much, because she was too busy with Luke to actually give me a notice, it was still kind of eventful.

The girls and I still do performances here and there, but there are barely any people coming from our school now.

It's just Luke, Zach and Alex which gives me a chance to check Alex out. I know I'm so creepy, sometimes I worry about myself.

My grandma is currently staying with us until Christmas, then she's going to Costa Rica with her friendsfor a small vacation.

She has been quite a good company since she came here. She even played FIFA with me AND beat me.

4-3.

I wasn't that surprised though, my grandma used to be a football player and she was a good one too.

Luke is leaving today after school and although I met him three weeks ago, I can't help but feel like we're a bit- tiny itsy bitsy- close.

Somewhere between Acquaintance and Casual Friend level, which is not even close to 'Close Friend' level.

Christmas is in a few days and I'm so excited. The girls and I are going out on Saturday to buy the Christmas presents.

We would have gone tomorrow after school, but Luke is helping me with another Geography lesson. I hate Geography so much, like screw Eratosthenes.

I was thinking about inviting Luke and his family to the Christmas party thing that dad does every year. I'm still not sure though.

I think that sums up everything on my mind. Well, at least for now.

I don't know what does the world have for me out there and I have a feeling that by the start of the new year, everything will go down. Or maybe not.

There are these occasional nights when I feel like I'm just going to break down and cry because I know that things will never be the same again.

Or maybe not.

The sound of the bell rings through the hallways and I shoot out of my chair, putting my textbook and my notebook inside the maroon backpack.

I notice Riley looking a bit off as she puts her stuff in her bag and I frown, walking over to her.

"Hey, Riles," I greet her, bending my head down a bit, so I could catch her blue gaze.

She looks up and she smiles weakly, "Hey, Lyn. What's up?" She asks, slinging her backpack over her shoulder.

"Are you okay?" I tilt my head to the side.

"I'm fine," She nods and she starts walking to the exit of the class and I walk by her side out of the class.

"You don't look fine," I tell her.

"I'm fine, don't worry," she waves it off.

"Okay, but if you want to talk, tell me and I'll be there for you to listen. Alright?" I say, wrapping my arm around her.

She bites her lip and nods, almost like she was hesitating to tell me or no, but I just let it go.

Riley lets out a sigh, "Mom and dad were fighting," she says in a low voice.

"Again?" I frown, coming to a halt stop and she does too.

"Yeah. It's getting tired to see them like that and I'm just worried that I might have to choose a side later on and-"

"You don't want to choose a side," I finish for her.

"Yeah," she nods, looking down at the floor.

"Don't worry, Riley. I'm sure you won't have to choose a side. Try to convince your parents to calm down and if you feel uncomfortable staying at your house,you could come stay at mines any time.Or Colette's or Sophie's. I'm sure they wouldn't mind either, we're your friends and we'll always be by your side no matter what," I smile at her.

"Thanks, Anna," she smiles back, then she pulls me in a hugand I hug her back.

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"So, are you guys coming to the Christmas party?" I ask my friends, as I grab a chip and pop it in my mouth.

"I'd love to come, Anna, but my sisters and I are visiting my aunt," Sophie replies.

"Dad and I are going back to Scotland to visit my grandmother," Colette says.

"Although, dad and mom are having problems, we'regoing to meet up with dad's family," Riley adds.

"So, none of you can come," I sum it up.

"Yeah," Sophie nods.

"Sorry, Anna. I know how you like to have us all together," Colette smiles sadly at me.

"It's okay, guys. I know how you all have your own families and you need to spend Christmas with them," I confirm.

"Isn't Jennie coming though?" Riley frowns.

"Yup," I sigh.

Why Jennie is coming? Anyone might ask. Well, since dad works for Jennie's father, he always likes to invite his boss and his friends to that Christmas party.

Basically, dad brings his work everywhere, even in Christmas. I wouldn't be surprised if he got me a calendar as a Christmas present.

"Damn, now I really feel bad," Sophie pouts.

"It's okay, Soph. I'll just ignore her and pretend she's not there. I mean, how hard could it be?" I shrug.

But, I felt like the bigger question is: how easy could it be? It's not like I can stay in my room the entire time. I wish.

"You'll be okay, Anna. You're a strong girl," Colette encourages me.

"Thanks, Lottie," I smile gratefully at her and pop another chip in my mouth.

I look around the cafeteria for awhile. Just like everyday, everyone is sitting with their cliques or their friends.

There's the jocks and the cheerleaders, they always sit together. There's the smart people and the science club. The drama club sits with the music one.

Abby's group which consists of my brother, his friends, Zoey and Abby, of course. Cameron told me it's okay if my friendsand I sit with them and so did Abby, but I told them that we prefer sitting alone.

Finally, Luke's group which consists of him, Zach, Alex, Jennie, her friends and Seth, although I know that Luke and him are not on good terms because of what happened in Year ten.A story for another time.

My gaze lands on Luke who's leaning back in his chair talking to Alex and I think of the Christmas party. I've been thinking about it since the morning and I still don't know whether I should ask him to come or no.

"What are you thinking about?" Lottie asks and I turn my head to my red-haired best friend.

"I was thinking about asking Luke to the Christmas party thing, as a kind gesture, of course," I reply.

Colette turns her head and looks at Luke, before turning her head back to me. "Do it," she nods.

"Really?"

"Yeah. Hold up," she says. "Guys, should Anna ask Luke to the Christmas thing?"

"Yup," Sophie nods.

"Go ahead, babe," Riley adds.

"Okay then."

"Does that mean confident Anna is in action?" Sophie teases.

"She sure is," I grin.

| | | |

"I'm not watching The Little Mermaid," Cole says.

Luke left about two hours ago and now my brothers and I are looking for a movie to watch as a family movie night.

Luke reminded me of the Geography tutoring lesson tomorrow and I was going to ask him to come to the party, but I decided to ask him tomorrow at his place.

Besides, confident Anna wasn't really ready yet. She never is anyways.

"Why not?" I whine.

"It's too musical," he argues.

"How about Scream?" Josh asks.

"Scream is stupid," I scoff.

"You're just saying that because you laugh whenever a person dies," Liam rolls his eyes.

I got banned from the cinema because of that.

"Exactly why it's stupid," I say in a 'duh' tone, then I stuff a handful of butter popcorn in my mouth.

"The Conjouring?" Josh asks.

"Pass," I say, waving my hand.

"Mission Impossible?"

"Not really in the mood for Tom Cruise."

"I Know What You Did Last Summer?"

"Yes!" I exclaim.

"Guys?" Josh turns to the rest of my brothers.

"Sure," Cameron says.

"Why not?" Cole shrugs.

"Sounds good," Liam adds.

Josh searches for the movie through his laptop on Netflix and he starts playing it, before he takes a seat between me and Cole.I place my feet on Cole's lap, while clutching the popcorn bowl with one arm.

"You just had to fucking fall now, right?" Josh mutters, in the middle of the movie.

"Take off your heels, you dumb female poodle!" I yell at the screen.

"Who the hell runs in heels?" Cole questions.

"Stupid girls in horror movies," Liam answers.

"True," the four of us say.

Suddenly, the front door opens and Mum rushes in, closing the door behind her while shivering slightly. The weather sometimes gets really cold in the evening.

"Hey, mum" Liam greets her.

"Hey, honey," she replies, her teeth chatters a bit.

She walks over to the couch where we are sitting and she hugs the five of us. Then, she goes to the heater and she rubs her hands to get some warmth.

"How was work?" I ask, not taking my eyes off of the laptop screen.

"Good," she answers.

The place falls silent for a moment. The only thing that could be heard is the people talking on the laptop screen.

"When is dad coming home?" Liam asks and Cameron reaches over to pause the movie, before we turn to look at Mum.

"I-I don't know, sweetie," she smiles sadly.

"Is he always going to be like this?" Cole asks, raising an eyebrow.

"Cole, your father is busy and he needs to focus on his work," Mum states.

"All the damn time?" Josh and Cole question.

"Guys, please-" she begs.

"Mum, tell me one time he actually stayed and spent time with his family. One time and I'll shut up," Cameron tells her.

Mum doesn't answer, she stays quiet and the same eerie silence takes over the living room once again. My mother looks down at the floor and I watch as her bottom lip trembles.

"Guys," I sigh, before swinging my legs off of Cole's lap.

I stand up and walk over my mother's figure, then I wrap my arms around her to hug her tightly and she hugs me back, burying her face in my shoulder.

Cameron sighs, "We're sorry, Mum. It's just that, dad barely hangs out with us and we feel like he's slowly walking out of our lives."

"Yeah," the other three nod.

Mum pulls away from me and she faces my brothers, "It's alright, sweetheart. I know how your father is rarely here and he never gets to spend time with us, but we should learn to live with it, just for now," she gives them a small smile.

"And maybe we should avoid the dad topic from now on, unless we really need to talk about it," I mention.

"Right," Cole nods.

"Wow, Mum. Anna is taller than you by a lot," Liam remarks.

Mum rolls her eyes and she purses her lips in annoyance, before walking inside the kitchen.

"You really are taller than her," Josh tells me.

"I heard that, Joshua!" She yells from the kitchen and the rest of us burst out laughing.

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