《A Knight's Lilies》Act 2 Chapter 18: Home and the Starry Window
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“Vik,
Once you get this message, know that we’ve failed. The darkness is ravaging most of Ingramar and with no clear access through the Volksgrad pass due to the avalanche, local forces have been overwhelmed without reinforcements. Working with a few tribes and what Boyars who listened, I’m organising a general retreat over the Frostwind. It’ll take a while so look after my apprentice until I get there. For now send an alert to the council to inform them on my behalf.
Blessed by the stars,
Seri “
- Letter found on demon tainted corpse by Volksgradian Ranger in the Frostwind Ranges
Vanilla and lavender tickled her awake. It felt different, comfortable almost when her eyes burst open not with dread or despair, but with a sense of hope and joy behind them. The moment was immediately ruined by remembering how fake Eva had drugged her the night prior but when she turned sideways in bed to find the perpetrator busy slumbering away, whatever ill will she held faded and she nuzzled Eva’s back. Even here she’s still a sleepy head, Sophie chuckled to herself.
Right, I can’t shirk my duties, gotta practice when I can! She declared triumphantly before turning into a blushing mess as she stared down at Eva. So close! Quietly rolling off the bed, she readjusted the blanket to cover Eva, leaning her head close and planting a small kiss on her mistress’s forehead before running away in fury.
I can’t believe I just did that, I can’t believe I…ahhh! In her panic she raced down the halls and quickly began prepping this impressive mansion for the day. Recalling where Eva had shown her yesterday, she hurried to the kitchen to prepare a breakfast treat before a sense of melancholy washed over her. Ah…I remember now, I wanted to have her try the dessert from Eichafen., what was it again…oat cookie, cream, berries, and more oats? Her shoulders sagged at the thought of the town, the faces of the people she knew. Master Albert, Wilfred, Maud, Riza, Gil, Thulgrim, Sara, all gone huh. Despondent, she began trawling through the kitchen to search for ingredients only to stumble across a conveniently tucked away box of oat cookies. That leaves the cream, fruits and oats.
So it was that she spent what she assumed was her morning whipping cream with crushed nuts, cooking fruit until it became jam. Then she carefully laid the different pieces together until it looked somewhat edible, in memory of the ones we lost. To lift her mood she snuck back into the courtyard garden before an idea struck her, rummaging around she found a series of flowerbeds, all bright and brilliant. But her nose had directed her to the familiar scent of lavender. She rummaged through the flowers until she managed to gather a few buds for a tea before racing back to the kitchen.
After that she snuck into Eva’s rooms, searched for a dress similar to what Eva wore yesterday night and snuck it into where Eva was sleeping before she dashed back out. Along the way she passed by the forbidden hallway and considered exploring before deciding against, however bad it might go, it will be with Eva, she resolved. Scrubbing up the kitchen, hallways and courtyard floor took up the rest of the morning and she sighed with exhaustion. So clean did she scrub a tile that she jumped at her reflection, only now embarrassingly realising that in her haste, she had rushed out to do everything in only her underwear.
Her cheeks flushed a bright scarlet and despite no sign of anyone else besides Eva living here, she still cautiously retreated back to her room. To her utter dismay she found Eva already awake and getting dressed as the older girl simply looked at her with a raised eyebrow before breaking into a smirk.
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“That’s something I don’t get to see all the time.” Eva giggled.
“Nuh-uhh…look-look away!” Sophie stammered out as she ran over to the wardrobe.
Eva carried on laughing whilst Sophie quickly found a fresh set of clothes for herself, looking like a stereotypical elf in a dark green shirt and brown pants. Looking at the wardrobe mirror made Sophie cringe at how unsightly she looked whilst Eva carried on giggling in the background.
“Don’t look at me!” Sophie yelped and only made Eva full on laugh.
“You look fine Sophie!” Eva reassured her between laughs, but she was most certainly not convinced.
“You’re lying! Why are all the clothes so fancy, so green? Don’t-ah!” Sophie almost squeaked as Eva wrapped her arms around her, Sophie immediately shrinking into an embarrassed ball.
“You look fine Sophie, I promise.” Eva cooed and Sophie acquiesced, unable to resist.
“Fine…” She grumbled half heartedly, “But stop laughing at me.”
“Heheh that’s the spirit, did you know your ears stood up when she get flustered?”
“Ah!” Sophie squeaked properly, running her hands over her ears, “Do they really? Argh! No way?!”
In the midst of her incredulity, Eva kissed the tip of her ears and Sophie felt an incredible shift in mood as new sensations tingled down her body.
“Ah…that’s…”
“They might or they might not. But you’re fine so don’t worry so much okay?”
“O-okay.”
“Soooo? You seemed panicked enough earlier. I’m guessing you planned something for the morning?” Eva teased.
Hearing this Sophie perked back up, though the fluttering that started within her from the light peck still refused to go away. Excited at showing something new to Eva, she quickly jabbered away. “Right! I hope you like it! It’s a dessert I remember from Eichafen and it was really good! Oh…but when umm I took the liberty to prepare breakfast, I hope you don’t mind me using your ingredients and uhh some flowers.” Sophie looked away sheepishly when Eva just chuckled.
“Mind? Of course not. It’s your home Sophie.”
“Uhh my home?” Sophie asked.
“Yes, your home.” Eva said with a smile, “But we can talk about that over breakfast?”
“Right! Come on!” Sophie jumped, her woes forgotten as she sought to impress her mistress. But what does she mean? My home? Is it not just the estate? Curious, she tabled the question and gleefully guided Eva back to the courtyard.
On the table now lay a little cup of the Mist’s Blessing, a mug of tea, and hand cut cubes of ham sandwich. Though admittedly that last one was a bit more hastily thrown together from whatever else she found in the kitchen. With a serious look on her face Sophie gently pulled out a chair and beckoned for Eva to sit, the dream Eva even giving a slight giggle just like the real one.
She was ripped out of her thoughts when she found Eva looking at her expectantly and fidgeted in place. What…what did I do wrong?
Perhaps seeing her worried expression Eva scrunched her face up in a silly way before waving at the spread in front of her.
“Well how do I start chef Sophie?” Eva drawled.
Sophie sighed in relief and just shrugged, “I usually just start eating.”
Nodding approvingly, Eva began digging into the dessert and Sophie watched as her expression changed at the different flavours and textures she tasted. Much to her own joy, Sophie saw a light smile on the other girl’s face and yipped internally, she likes it! Her celebrations were cut short when she remembered their conversation from earlier and quickly probed her ears with her fingers. Do they really perk up if I get excited?
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“Sophie.” Eva spoke after another mouthful, her eyes narrowing and timbre dropping. Oh no.
“Yes?” Sophie gulped, her attention fully diverted.
“Don’t just stand, come sit.”
Nervously, Sophie pulled out the other chair and sat down, her legs clamped together as a growing sense of fear built up within her.
“I know what you’re worried about, and let me tell you. This place, me, you, it’s not a dream.” Eva stated matter-of-factly, her eyes never learning Sophie’s. “Not exactly anyways. In a sense it's real, but I suspect you already felt what I’m talking about at least. It all feels quite strange doesn't it? A bit empty too.”
A nod.
Eva sighed, as if reluctant to go on before she scooped up some of the dessert and waggled it in front of Sophie. “Open wide.”
Sophie obeyed and Eva fed her a bite, the taste bringing back the sad memories of a place now gone. But it does taste good, sweet, nutty and fruity, just like how it was.
“Good?”
“Mmm.”
“I’m glad you like your own creation so much.”
“Heheh.” Sophie smiled and Eva nodded, her eyes never leaving Sophie.
“I know this will be a bit strange but…this place...is your home Sophie, a recreation of it anyways.”
Sophie’s eyes darted around them, taking in every detail within the marble and flowers as if searching for some hidden clue just to land back on Eva.
“What…what do you mean? Isn’t our home the estate?”
“Yeah.” Eva sighed again, this time rubbing her forehead, “But this, this place is your actual home, was your actual home.” Seeing Sophie’s increasingly confused expression Eva, “I-ugh, what I mean is this place was your home before well…before the real me found you.” Eva spoke, her voice growing quieter with every word.
“Before…before the real you…found me?” Sophie asked, now truly bewildered.
“As far as I can tell, this place is a recreation of where you used to live. Partly anyways.”
“This place?” Sophie leaned back, taking in the scenery again.
“Yeah, this place.”
“But-”
“Sophie.”
“Mmhmm?”
“Just enjoy the moment.” Eva smiled as she poured some tea.
Quietly, the two finished their meal, the tense if still friendly silence making Sophie fidgety. Eventually they had finished the desserts and had a decent crack at the pot of lavender tea as they leaned back in their chairs, looking at each other like two fighters sizing up their opponents. Sophie squirmed at the feeling, a discomforting notion burrowing away in her mind that reminded her of how Aurelia and Gunmar had eventually had to go their own ways in the recent novel. When Eva eventually broke the silence, the pit in Sophie’s stomach dropped as she just knew that was going to happen.
“I tried putting this off but I knew you were curious,” Eva stood up and Sophie looked back at her with worry before Eva slyly smiled. “You remember? The hall?”
“Ah! The forbidden one! We were going to explore it! Hey wait, you drugged me yesterday!” Sophie suddenly yelled as words triggered her memory, how rude!
Eva spared her a short chortle before her expression dropped, looking morose and sullen at the accusation, before her shoulders deflated and just nodding. Acknowledging her wrongdoings. Sophie felt her heart stop again at the sight, Eva looking sad made her sad too and she instinctively grabbed Eva’s hand. Just the slight touch of acknowledgement made the other girl perk up back to life slightly and Sophie fought to hide the furious blush building up within her.
“Sorry…” Eva mumbled.
“It’s okay, I forgive you.” Sophie whispered back, “So what is it about the hallway?”
Eva flashed a sad smile before leading the two of them through the palace, taking deliberate care to go at what seemed like a snail’s pace to Sophie. An ominous feeling began bubbling within as the same nervousness came back with a vengeance. She looks so serious and sad.
Eva’s grip on Sophie’s hand only tightened as they drew closer, Sophie responding with a squeeze of her own in kind. “Eva?”
“This door…” Eva hung her head low as they walked up to it, “This will open a doorway out of here, out of this…place.”
“Uhhh…what?”
“Here, Sophie. This world, realm, whatever you’ll end up calling it. You’ll get to go back to your friends, back to…the real me.”
Eva let go of Sophie and touched the door gently, to Sophie it looked like any other set of ornate wooden doors that she saw within the apparent palace. But Eva’s hands reached the handle she paused, her shoulders seemed to drop.
“Heh, I wonder if this is what the real me feels.” Eva chuckled darkly, her pursed lips and furrowed brows adding to Sophie’s worry.
“E-Eva?”
Eva spun on her heels and her gaze bore into Sophie, as if she was taking in the very fabric of her existence. The sudden intrusion made Sophie wilt under the intense glare and her eyes tried darting everywhere but forward.
“You’re like this lost little lamb that needs protecting. You’re capable of a lot, but gah! Sometimes you’re so insufferable but in spite of that there’s just a part of me that wants to guide you along, to protect you. Ugh, it makes saying goodbye so much harder.” Eva groaned.
“Goodbye?” Sophie murmured, her mind horrified at her prediction coming true.
“Mmm, yeah. Ah-ah-ah, don’t say anything and just listen, I hope you at least…remember me a little. You can do that for me right?”
Sophie gave her a furtive nod, not quite understanding everything.
“Heh, did you know I always loved looking at your eyes? The way they sparkle always reminded me of little sapphire gems. Gah look at me trying to reminisce, as if we were friends and I wasn't just some..." For a split second Eva looked away before looking back at her, "Anyways, hopefully you get back to…well the real Eva soon.” Eva’s voice dropped, what little bravado she had fading as her hands drew Sophie’s face close to her. “Do you think I was real enough at least?” She asked with a faint whisper.
Sophie stared ahead with wide eyes, her eyes tingling with anticipation as she gulped down her courage before trying to speak. Without giving her the chance to speak, Eva leaned in to give Sophie a small peck on the nose, the half elf clenching her eyes shut at the surprise attack. The tiniest inkling of joyful warmth radiated throughout her face before a small sound caught her attention.
Tink
She froze as her eyes opened, Eva was no longer in front of her. She spun around with a rising panic only to find no traces of her. Dread filled her heart and she turned back toward the source of the sound, the small red gem she remembered seeing on Eva’s collar lay peacefully on the marble floor.
“Eva?” She asked, her voice quivering slightly. “Eva!?” She yelled more forcefully only to receive no response.
Reluctantly she grasped the sanguine crystal and examined it thoroughly. But no matter how hard she turned it in her hands, she found nothing but a crystal.
“Eva? This isn't funny!” She tried again, but the crystal did not stir.
"He...hello? Eva?" She gave it a small shake, but nothing answered.
Bracing herself for the worst, she timidly pushed the door open.
A hexagonal room greeted her, shelves upon shelves of books, scrolls and all manner of writing decorated the shelves. A small work table sat at the opposite end of the room as a small dias surrounded what appeared to be a hole in the room. She peaked over the edge to find an eerie nothingness, only a pitch blackness that seemed to extend forever.
She examined the room further and still found no sign of Eva. Her heart sank as she slowly understood that Eva became the crystal, or rather the crystal was Eva. Sophie leaned against a pillar and slid to the floor, her hand clutching at the gem, hoping that somehow sheer strength could bring this Eva back. But she couldn’t avoid the truth and a profound sense of melancholy washed over her at the thought, knowing that this Eva was never going to be the real Eva, that their time together was always going to end.
Combing over the room once more, she found a small pedestal hidden between bookshelves that conveniently enough seemed to hold a socket just around the size of the gem. "Ah," she grunted, "figures."
Looking back down at the small sanguine crystal in her hand, her heart stilled for a moment, the realisation that whatever strange version of Eva this had been, it was likely the closest they would ever become. Real Eva had too many responsibilities and obligations for Sophie to ever be willing to impose upon her, by the Goddess what are these strange thoughts. Rubbing her hand over the gem she whispered one last time, “You’re real enough to me.” Sophie smiled sadly before tearing herself away from the gem. She solemnly gave the gem a small kiss before she slotted it into the socket.
Immediately the air was sucked out of the room, followed by a blinding flash that sent her tumbling for cover in a vain attempt to avoid the light. Then there was a silence, an eerie silence that seemed to extend even to the soul. A silence that just felt wrong. When she finally looked over she found herself staring at something that seemed to tug at her heart.
The hole in the room held a brilliant purplish star-scape that awaited. Like a window to the sky, dark purples and blacks painted the background whilst stars of all colours and sizes flickered brilliantly against the dark backdrop. In the distance, gassy pinkish purplish clouds held more clusters of lights even as other luminous objects sparkled for attention. Her eyes darted all around trying to take in the strange sights.
It was a sense of majesty that felt strangely known to her, the raw beauty and power of the stars just beyond her grasp awakening a nostalgic feeling within that she couldn’t quite place. Beyond that, she couldn’t shake the melancholic feeling of losing Eva, the sense of sadness did not feel alien. To her, it was almost as if she already lost something here before, like something close to her had also been taken. Snatched away from her in naught but a moment.
Taking one last glance back at the room, she flashed a final smile at the gem before turning back to the portal. It was a short but good time Eva, thank you. She just knew she was meant to walk through, like some strange tendril of fate was beckoning for her. With a sigh, she clenched her eyes shut and into the starry window. A step into an unknown place that felt ever so familiar.
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