The Wolf You Feed

Days before Buffy’s birthday, Xander struggled with exhausting indecision. His mind would not stop asking if he should stand idle while Buffy and Angel consummate their love, allowing Angelus to return. Or should he stop it as he had done nearly every time before? The time looper intimately knew the horrors the sadistic vampire would inflict upon his friends and the citizens of Sunnydale. Xander felt as if he was granting the villain free rein to terrorize his friends, and all because Future Buffy said her younger self needed the perspective that pain and time brought. Stepping aside as a dark cloud of evil descended over his town made him sick to his stomach, but if it was the way out of the time braid, he’d bear it like a madman.

‘The pain I’ve gone through shaped me into the person I am now,’ Xander kept reciting Future Buffy’s assertion repeatedly. ‘I can’t even picture a life without all that grief and heartache.’

And now, Xander was willingly allowing grief and heartache he knew he could prevent. It made him wonder where that line ended. He didn’t want to enable unnecessary pain to those around him, but he couldn’t ignore the possibility that allowing Angelus to return because of Buffy’s decision was the only way out.

Somehow, Giles managed to rent out the Bronze for Buffy’s surprise birthday party. Xander was at the food table helping Cordelia with the chips and dip, and the distracted boy was hiding how incredibly nervous he was. Everyone was one night away from Angelus, and he felt every second.

The anxious teen thought to himself, ‘Does going through life’s hardship truly build a person in a different way than protecting them from that pain? Isn’t being heartbroken and depressed the reason Spike snuck past Buffy’s defenses in the first place?’ It still stung to think of Buffy’s relationship with Spike, but he couldn’t deny Spike had more success than Xander ever did. ‘There has to be a small kernel of truth there,’ he thought, though the tone sounded more like Nox.

Adding to Xander’s anxiety, Angel was in the Bronze with all the Scoobies, setting up the table to put Buffy’s gifts on with Giles like it was any other Monday night. Every minute, Xander thought to pull Giles and Angel aside and confess to everything, but every minute passed without such action. After the pool table was set with the cake and plates, the wrapped presents were on the table, the balloons and party hats were distributed to everyone, all that was left was to wait on Buffy.

As the Scoobies waited for the girl of the hour, Xander walked over to the sound stage. Having experienced it many times, he fully expected the Slayer to burst through the window any minute. Even when Giles or Willow asked him to stay closer to the entrance of the club to welcome Buffy with a grand ‘Happy Birthday!’ he stayed by the stage. Using his ring’s power, the teenage boy heard Buffy fighting outside through the walls and counted the seconds.

When Buffy and a vampire burst through the large, blacked-out windows, landing hard on the stage next to Xander, the unsurprised teenager casually grabbed a picture frame off the wall. When the vampire and Slayer stood up, Xander smashed the picture frame on the demon’s head, allowing Buffy to grab the drumstick on the snare drum, and stab the distracted blood-sucker through the heart, dusting the vampire in epic fashion.

After Buffy swooned over her surprise birthday party, they investigated the crate the vampires were transporting. Opening the large wooden box, the Scoobies found the Judge’s blue arm inside. Xander played as surprised as everyone else, but within himself, he felt nothing. Xander was eating cake as the room discussed the unkillable demon and transporting the crate as far out of Sunnydale as possible. Jenny suggested Angel take it far away, which Xander knew wouldn’t happen. He got more emotional over the fluffy velvet cake than the apocalyptic doom the Judge brought to the rest of his friends.

The next day was the moment of truth. If Xander was going to keep Buffy from so much heartache and sadness, he had to act before nightfall. He helped the research along during the day, but he wasn’t paying attention to any of the words in the book, since warning Buffy was always on the tip of his tongue. It made his stomach queasy just holding himself back, and by nightfall, Xander watched Buffy and Angel leave to infiltrate Spike’s base of operations. Watching her walk away, as if in slow motion, he said nothing. Buffy and Angel were subsequently caught.

Xander’s mind was too distraught to see Cordelia or forge that night. He ran for hours, instead, like a man who didn’t produce lactic acid and could run for days without tiring. When he ran across a pair of vampires, Xander happily ignored his internal conflict to fight the demons. The teen activated his ring and enhanced his strength and speed. Instinctively, the master warrior predicted their fast combination attacks, dodged, and countered them with ease. Grabbing a weathered pencil off the street, Xander slipped their obvious punches and stabbed each one squarely in the chest. They were dust in the wind before long, and the teen smacked his face, lamenting how little he felt with an exhausted groan.

‘I’m cool as a cucumber fighting two vampires—unarmed and by myself—but letting Angelus out of his cage terrifies the shit out of me?’ Chuckling to himself, Xander was tired of feeling conflicted—of worrying about what he was becoming—and simply gave up trying to feel secure about his decision. Walking home, he thought to himself, ‘Just let the chips fall where they may.’

The following day, a reserved Buffy entered the library looking for Angel, and due to all of Xander’s sexual history with women, he could see how different the Slayer looked. Dressed in form-fitting black slacks, a baby-blue spaghetti-strap top, and a black sheer blouse, the teenage girl didn’t appear physically different. He saw the change in her greenish-blue eyes. They felt more aware now, as if the world was no longer innocent, like learning she was the chosen one all over again.

As Buffy deflected her friends’ questions about the night before, Xander knew that Angelus had emerged. Buffy and the rest of the Scoobies didn’t learn about the sadistic vampire’s return until later that night when he nearly killed an unsuspecting Willow. Then, to Buffy’s shame and embarrassment, they all learned the reason behind Angel becoming Angelus once again. Everyone was naturally surprised, and then argued about their chances of winning against the Judge before a distraught Buffy fled the library. In Xander’s estimation, Cordelia said it best.

“This is great,” the beautiful brunette rebuked sarcastically. “There’s an unkillable demon in town, Angel’s joined his team, and the Slayer’s a basket case. I’d say we’ve hit bottom.”

Rather than go to the military base’s armory, Xander suggested to his affable gang, “Why don’t we ask that Nox guy for help?”

Looking away from the double doors Buffy had escaped through, a sympathetic Willow pointed out, “We don’t know where he is.”

“Yeah,” Xander admitted. “But, assuming the Judge and company don’t strike tonight, we should try to find him, right? Maybe he knows something we don’t. Other than me, Buffy, and Cordelia, has anyone here seen him?” Though Jenny looked conflicted, she held her tongue, and after a moment of silence, Xander continued, “Well, we know he hunts at night. So, unless anyone has a better idea, I suggest Cordy, Oz, and I start looking while the rest keep researching.”

Reluctantly, Giles agreed and Oz, Cordelia, and Xander spent much of the night searching, to no avail. The next day, Jenny was discovered by Buffy to be Janna of the Kalderash people, along with her mission to ensure Angel’s continued suffering. Angry and betrayed, Buffy and Giles told the Romany woman to leave the library and not return. Xander knew all of this when he walked down the hallway—dressed as Nox—and noticed the computer teacher tearing up as she ran from the library. Though Xander ignored Jenny as he walked into the library with Slaymore in hand and an invisible Dreadnought at his back, he made a mental note to check on her later.

Buffy, Giles, Willow, Oz, and Cordelia were all surprised to see the eye-glowing hunter in black enter the library. With the light of the room, Xander wondered if his friends would be able to see through his disguise. His black and gray camo scarf was up to the bridge of his nose and his black beanie covered down to his eyebrows. With his hood up, his face was covered in shadow, and the glowing whitish-blue eyes only focused their attention on the parts that could never be the Xander they knew.

Buffy was the first to notice the dark prowler enter the library. As she stood up to meet the mystery man in black at the center of the room, the blonde voiced, “Giles, that’s him.”

They all stood, and turned to his arrival. They stopped near Buffy to observe Nox in more light than they’ve ever seen before. Xander was a little nervous when they all stared at him, but none of them seemed able to see through the disguise. Nox tossed a sheathed sword at Buffy and she caught it by the middle with ease.

“It’s called Slaymore,” Nox’s deeper voice said. “It’s similar to Dreadnought.”

“Dreadnought?” Giles asked.

Taking the invisible axe from his back, Nox made his large weapon visible—surprising them—before reversing the effect and hooking it back in place. Buffy and the others shifted their attention from the magical axe to the Arthurian sword in her hand, pondering the possibilities. Buffy specifically had already seen Dreadnought in action and wondered if her sword could do the same. The Slayer gripped the handle and withdrew Slaymore from its scabbard with a smooth sounding SHLING.

“Wooooow,” Buffy gasped at the lightly glowing weapon.

Thanks to Future Willow’s magical advertising and the mysterious knowledge of the runes he gained, the Excalibur-style sword was even more powerful than previous iterations. The double-edged sword was pattern-welded with the feather model and the razor-sharp edge had a blood-red tint. The core of the blade had the runes ܕܗܓܪܘܩܦ etched into the steel and inlaid with gold from the Du Lac Cross. The dark lines of the feather pattern connected to the runes like arteries, supplying raw power to the blade and its wielder.

Nox told the Slayer, “Since it’s forged, I don’t think it’ll kill the Judge, but it should help.”

Taking Dreadnought from his back, Nox made it visible before throwing it at the ceiling, surprising Giles and Willow. Keeping his throwing hand extended, the others were surprised when the warrior called it back into his hand before it was embedded into the ceiling.

“To call it to you,” Nox began. “Just think about really needing it.”

Stepping forward, an amazed Giles stuttered to ask, “E-Excuse me—Nox, is it?” Xander didn’t reply, so the Watcher continued, “Can you tell us where you originate from?”

Ignoring Giles’ question, Xander made a show of looking around the library before asking in his deeper tone of voice, “Has the boy been back today?”

Looking around curiously, Giles asked, “What boy?”

“He said his name was… Sander?” Nox answered with a curious flourish.

Quickly, Willow was the first to ask, “You met Xander? Where?”

“He found me,” Nox revealed to the concerned group. “Told me what was going on with the Judge while I was away. He hasn’t returned?”

Both Willow and Cordelia stepped forward to ask with growing concern, “Was he supposed to?” and, “Did something happen to him?”

More inclined to curb their worry, Nox told them, “You focus on the Judge.” He began to leave as he added, “I’ll find the boy.”

“I’m coming with you!” Cordelia called, turning to get her purse, and Xander felt touched she’d declare to go without hesitation.

Nox extended his palm, making Cordelia stop before he explained, “Where I’m going will be dangerous.”

“Dangerous!?” Willow, Buffy, and Cordelia repeated.

Buffy asked, “Do you think something bad happened to Xander?”

“Possibly,” Nox casually replied.

“How bad?” the Slayer quickly followed with.

“I don’t exactly hunt in the safest areas,” Nox answered. “If I’m being honest, I was surprised he actually found me. He’s certainly got luck on his side.”

Willow turned to her best girlfriend and asserted, “We have to find him! He could be in serious danger!”

With more edge to his deeper voice, Nox repeated, “I’ll get the boy. You handle the Judge.”

Xander turned to leave as Giles called out, “Mr. Nox! If the sword isn’t enough to stop the Judge, do you know of another method that may?”

While walking away, he answered over his shoulder, “I do,” before exiting the library.

In his absence, the room fell silent. Hesitantly, Buffy turned to the worried group and, with a sense of urgency, asserted, “Priority one: we get everyone safe. Priority two: I kill it. Let’s go.”

“Uh…” Cordelia sounded in shocked disbelief, then declared, “Priority one: find Xander! Or have you forgotten your friends?!”

Turning to the popular girl, Buffy contended, “You don’t think I want-” However, the Slayer cut herself off, restraining her desire to do what she wanted in favor of what was needed. Slightly calmer, Buffy told the group, “We’re going to have to trust Nox with Xander.”

“You hated his guts not five minutes ago,” Cordelia continued to argue. “But now you’re fine and dandy trusting him? Excuse me if I don’t have zero confidence in your choice of men!”

“What choice do we have?” Buffy yelled back. She simplified for the group, “Either we save Xander ourselves and let the Judge start killing innocent people, or we kill the Judge and let Nox find Xander.” Turning to Cordelia, Buffy concluded with, “I know what Xander would choose.”

Despite how much she wanted to, Cordelia couldn’t refute the argument. None of them could because they knew what Xander would pick. Accepting the Slayer’s words, the woeful Watcher nodded and they all went to work.

Xander rode his motorcycle straight to the army base, snuck in, pilfered the weapons he needed, stored them in a large army duffle bag, then rode back. Fully disguised with an invisible Dreadnought clipped to his back, the M72 shoulder rocket launcher slung over his shoulder, and the M4 semi-automatic rifle in his hands, Nox entered Sunnydale Mall. Every so often, a civilian or a group would run past him, but rather than fleeing from the food court toward his left, the scared civilians were coming from the right wing of the shopping center.

‘Huh… The theater this time,’ Xander thought as he observed Buffy fighting Angel & Drusilla in the lobby of the movie theater.

Willow, Cordelia, and Oz were frantically trying to prevent amused vampires from terrorizing innocent civilians, while Giles sniped at the Judge with bolts fired from his crossbow. It didn’t hurt the seven-foot-tall blue demon. The Judge even looked as if he felt nothing, but the attacks interrupted it from absorbing the lives of the civilians hiding around the entire area. Xander saw scared civilians behind counters, pillars, benches, trash receptacles, and the arcade games.

He also observed Buffy hurl Slaymore at the Judge, annoying him when the sharp blade stuck in his body and his soulless, demon hands couldn’t remove the weapon. When Drusilla and Angelus would be too much for her to fight against, she’d recall her magical weapon back to her hand. It was clear that, if it wasn’t for Slaymore’s magical properties, this would’ve been a much quicker fight.

Walking with evenly measured steps and a low center of gravity—like a trained soldier infiltrating an enemy compound—Xander raised his assault rifle toward the first of eight vampires taunting Willow, Oz, Cordelia, and the civilians behind them, and it was as if the entire world went silent the second before he squeezed the trigger. Thunderously loud shots stabbed the ears of everyone in the room, turning their attention to the dark soldier calmly engaging them. Buffy, Angelus, Drusilla, Giles, Willow, Oz, Cordy, and all the vampires focused on the new arrival as Nox downed two of the blood-sucking demons. Though they wouldn’t die from the bullets tearing through their flesh, the demons would certainly feel agony. The other vampires immediately charged at him as Nox patiently made a B-Line toward the Judge.

“Go!” Xander’s altered voice yelled at Cordelia, Oz, and Willow, and they began evacuating all the civilians while Nox dropped one howling vampire after another. When the Judge was in range, Nox jumped onto the concession stand and switched the assault rifle for the big gun at his back. As he pulled the back of the launcher out, unclipped the safety, and took aim, Buffy, Angelus, and Drusilla were running clear of the blue demon.

The Judge barely asked, “What’s that do?” before Nox pushed the red button and the soul-sucking demon exploded into a fiery ball of smoking blue chunks.

Taking no time to appreciate the explosiveness of his work, Nox swiftly switched back to the M4 rifle—replacing the magazine—and returned to firing at the livid vampires, motivating them to flee for their undead lives. Angelus ran, as did Drusilla, but Buffy chased after her former lover while the disguised Xander rushed to his friends.

Making sure his face was covered and his eyes were glowing, Nox told them, “Your friend is fine. A little roughed up, but okay.”

Willow asked, “Where is-”

“Somewhere safe,” Nox interjected, then left them with, “He’ll call you.”

The mystery man in black ran off to chase the fleeing vampires, shooting several on his way out, if only to ensure none of them thought to loiter for fresh meat. He didn’t chase long, but once the scene was sufficiently resolved, he returned the weapons he borrowed.

Afterward, Xander stopped at a payphone and called—as himself—Willow, Giles, and Cordelia to let them know he’d gotten caught by the remaining Gorch brother, who wanted to use him as bait to get Buffy. Though Willow and Cordelia wanted to see him, Xander told them he was resting in Nox’s secret lair, but he would see them the following day. After bidding them goodnight, he drove straight to Buffy’s house.

Still in black, face covered, and eyes glowing, Xander waited by her window until she finally entered her room, after which he rapped lightly on the glass. The blonde wasn’t spooked to see him outside her bedroom, but she hesitated before opening the window, as if understanding the reason behind his visit.

After her window slid up, the first thing Nox asked was, “You want to explain to me why Angel was not only standing by the Judge, but fighting you?”

The blonde turned away from the window and rubbed her face before dejectedly confessing, “Listen, I’ve had, like, the longest week ever. Can we play ‘Blame The Slayer For Everything’ another time?”

“A Romany man was murdered,” Xander told her. “A young woman was drained to death near Angel’s apartment.”

More alert, she turned back to him to ask, as if surprised, “You know where he lives?”

“That’s where your mind went?” an irate Nox groused, making his eyes flicker brighter for a second. “I just told you people died because of him!” Clenching her fist, Buffy looked away, half glaring, half ready to cry to herself. She didn’t say a word of defense or deflection. The Slayer simply took it in, and Xander eased his ire, deciding instead to move on. “He’s a blood-sucking demon somehow shacking up with the Vampire Slayer. You really think I wouldn’t keep an eye on your boyfriend just because you claimed he was good?”

Feeling the anger rising, Buffy wiped her eyes before glaring at him and asking with crossed arms, “What do you want?”

“Aside from a little accountability, I came to give you a warning,” Nox’s deep voice answered. “When I go for the kill, don’t get in my way.”

Not that Xander would risk looping back by killing Angel, but Buffy didn’t need to know that.

Taking a step forward, the fierce blonde defiantly returned, “Or what?”

Unbothered by her pressure, Nox answered, “You can choose. Either make sure you remember all the men, women, and children he kills from this point forward on account you wanted a boyfriend, or I kick your pretty little ass.”

Bullishly, she mocked him with, “Have you been checking out my ass?”

“My eyes see more than most, to begin with,” he argued, before annoyingly adding, “and who told you to wear such tight clothing? I honestly don’t know how you fight in half the things you wear.”

“Can’t help but notice you think it’s pretty,” she continued teasing, as if winning somehow. However, Xander could tell she was deflecting. The girl in front of him looked happy to talk about anything else but Angel. Nox rolled his glowing eyes, as if annoyed by her insinuation, then exited through her window.

The next night Xander, as himself, visited Jenny. She had been kicked out of the group by Buffy and Giles, failed her people, and saw her uncle’s mutilated body. She was not in the best mental & emotional place and was self-medicating with a bottle of scotch. Despite how effortless it would be to end up in bed together, Xander evaded all of her advances. He may not have been in an official relationship with Cordelia, but if she wasn’t doing anything with anyone else, he wouldn’t either. When the distraught teacher passed out, Xander left his jacket on her bed and a glass of water on her nightstand with a note that read:

‘I hope you feel better in the morning. And don’t worry, my lips are sealed. I won’t tell anyone about tonight. Xander.’

Ten minutes later, Nox entered her apartment. Taking her hand in his, Xander used his ring to wake her up. The woman was surprised and alert, but also still feeling the effects of the alcohol in her system. Thus, she wasn’t terrified at his dark presence or when he sat on the edge of the bed. The inebriated woman took it all in stride as she sat up and rested her back against the headboard. Xander extended the glass of water and Jenny took it.

He also grabbed the letter and looked at it a moment before asking in his deep voice, “Janna of the Kalderash people, will you consider assisting me?”

The downtrodden teacher glumly answered, “Leave me alone.”

Nox handed her the piece of paper before pointing out, “Didn’t I see the Xander boy leave here not long ago?” Jenny read the note as Nox added, “And isn’t that his jacket on your bed? Aren’t there rules about sleeping with high school students?”

Recognizing his questions for what they were—threats—Jenny glared at him.

Nox explained, “What I need from you is simple. When I first learned of Angel’s situation, I did not know a vampire could have a soul. I discovered you, your uncle, and your people through my research on how his situation came to be. I’m here to ask you to recreate the curse that turned Angelus into Angel.”

Defeated, but with a hint of ire, she replied, “Those magics are lost, even to my people.”

“They’re not,” he assured her. “You can do this. I’m certain of it. And now you have the motivation to do so.”

“Are you threatening me?” she asked, though it was obvious.

Humoring her, he answered, “If that’s what it takes.”

“I’ll… think about it.”

Taking the glass of water from her hand, he set it down on the nightstand before explaining to her, “I don’t care who you bring to your bed.” He could see the shame in her eyes but didn’t look away as he finished saying, “But this can save a lot of lives. Do this for them.”

Jenny looked away, weighing the options in her mind. After a moment, she turned to him and asked, “How can I reach you?”

Getting the cooperation he wanted, Nox stood up and took a piece of paper out of his front pocket. He set it down on the nightstand as he told her, “Here’s a number.” Before leaving, he instructed the sensual woman, “I’ll never pick up. Leave a message and I’ll get back to you.”

On their next Review Day meeting, the group was in the library recapping what happened against the Judge as well as examining Slaymore. Giles and Willow enjoyed examining the magical sword, and the unknown runes etched on the surface, but were intrigued even more when writing them on a sheet of paper did nothing magical. Within minutes, Giles and Willow began trying to identify the runes, figuring there had to be a process to activating the characters. While they were busy researching, Xander pulled Buffy to the side to talk.

Unlike in previous loops, Xander not only understood the heartache Buffy was going through, but he could act on it. During the night, Nox could be the mean part of his personality, saying and doing whatever he wanted without fear or care of reprisal. During the day, Xander could be the friendliest friend Buffy or Willow could ask for. The separation of self was liberating because Xander didn’t have to remember terrible memories of Buffy or his home life. Nox could take all of that on himself, while Xander could be free to be a friend and nothing more.

Leaning against the check-out desk, Xander gently expressed to Buffy, “I can’t pretend to know what you’re going through. I mean, I’m sure it sucks… I just can’t imagine how much. So I won’t try. I just wanted you to know that I’m sorry this is happening to you.” The blonde beauty blinked in surprise while he finished with, “And that you always have me in whatever way you need.”

Buffy thought in silence for a second before suddenly wrapping her arms around him and hugging him tightly, making him feel content. Xander hugged her back and held her for as long as she needed. The embrace wasn’t sexual or forced, but it came from a genuinely friendly side of his heart. Saying the nice things he wanted to say during the day and the less nice things he also meant at night was a strangely satisfying duality; a peaceful feeling. It reminded him of a story Future Oz told Old Man Xander about when they were in Tibet fighting another wave of evil.

Oz had recounted the story of an old Cherokee Indian teaching his grandson about life. The wise elder told his grandson that a fight was raging inside of him. ‘A terrible fight between two wolves,’ he said. ‘One was evil: anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.’ The grandfather then explained that the other wolf was good: ‘joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.’ The grandfather explained that this fight was going on inside of every human on the planet. When the grandson asked which wolf would win the fight, the old Cherokee simply answered, ‘The one you feed.’

Letting Buffy go, they returned to the others to finish Review Day. All the while, Xander felt confident he was feeding the right wolf.

Nox went on patrol that night and found a lethargic Buffy absentmindedly treading the cemetery alone. Xander could just imagine how much her world had changed, but as Nox—who remembered all the abuse he’d suffered from his school, parents, and friends—he didn’t care. Her broken heart felt no different from his when he found her under Spike or with Angel all those loops ago. To see her so despondent that Nox barely needed to sneak up to her, he felt justified.

Though mean, Nox felt in character when he voiced from behind her, “The view’s a lot different when you’re not sucking vampire-face, isn’t it?”

Instantly tense, Buffy spun around, her hand already around Slaymore’s handle. When she realized it was him, the annoyed Slayer huffed before firing back, “Sure is. It got a hell of a lot worse.”

“So hostile to the man who gave you that sword,” Nox pointed out.

Buffy removed the leather belt carrying Slaymore from around her waist, and lifted the magical sword as she asked, “You want it back?”

Raising his palm, Nox explained in his deep, gruff voice, “The sword was made for you, Slayer.” Removing Dreadnought from his back and making it visible, he added, “Just like Dreadnought was meant for me.” Latching his axe on his back again, he voiced, “I wouldn’t take Slaymore back even if you offered it to me. But I wouldn’t mind a bit of gratitude.”

“Gratitude?” she repeated with raised eyebrows. She clenched her sword hard enough to make the leather creak as she stepped forward and argued, “You’ve done nothing but belittle me with your snarky comments and judgy looks since I met you. And I’m supposed to be grateful?”

Taking a stern step forward as well, Nox sharply pointed out, “For saving your mother, saving your funny friend, giving you a one-of-a-kind sword, and saving your ass when it was getting handed to you by your ex and the Judge? Yeah, a little ‘thank you’ would be appreciated!” Though nervous for being so close to her, his eyes were bright and his face was mostly covered, so he wasn’t overly worried when he towered over her to say, “Or do I have to be the walking dead to earn any goodwill from you?” Buffy freely glared at him, but he didn’t buckle in the slightest under her ire, and instead demanded, “Tell me what changed Angel.”

Defensively, she asked, “Why?”

“I need to know,” Nox simply answered.

“Then find out somewhere else,” she asserted. “And stay the hell away from me.”

Stepping back, Nox answered, “as you wish,” surprising her. “I’ll ask your funny friend.”

Immediately protective of her friend, Buffy warned, “Stay away from Xander.”

“Why?” Nox returned, smiling under his camo scarf. “I saved his life. Maybe he’s a little more appreciative.”

Stepping up to the taller man in a slow and threatening manner, the provoked Slayer warned him, “I said, don’t go near my friends.”

Tilting his head at the smaller girl, Nox’s smile reached his glowing eyes as he asked with amusement, “Or what? You gonna slay me? Or are you just going to try your best, then fail miserably, like with your corpse boyfriend-”

Buffy punched him hard, and all he could do was rotate his body with the momentum to absorb most of the destructive impact. As his vision danced and the night vision went in and out, Xander recalled an old tip from Willow. He could hear her say, clear as day, ‘Probably best not to antagonize the broken heart of a teenage girl with the strength of a hundred men.’

Calling on the power of Odin’s ring, his migraine, dizziness, broken jaw, and lacerated oral cavity began to heal in less than thirty seconds. It still hurt like crazy, but Xander’s Navy SEAL training helped him embrace the pain as he straightened up. With his back to her, Nox lowered his camo scarf around his neck, since he was expecting more blood out of his mouth and nose. He lowered the rest of his beanie down to the tip of his nose, and with his hood down, he looked similar to one of his favorite Marvel characters; like the black Daredevil mask, only with perfectly cut holes for his glowing eyes to see through.

As Xander spit out red and wiped his bloody nose, his night vision came back, and he felt his throat could speak deeply once again. Nox faced her, and at the blood traveling down his lips and chin, Buffy at least had the decency to look mildly apologetic. Enhancing his physical prowess as much as he could, his shoulders flexed and his neck looked thicker as he stepped up to her.

His voice was grim, like two moss-covered stones rubbing against each other as he asked, “Did that make you feel better, Slayer? Is that the kind of person you are? Someone who enjoys assaulting other people because you didn’t like what they had to say?”

Never breaking eye contact, Buffy didn’t reply to his criticism of her. She looked stuck to Xander; furious without justification, remorseful but stubborn, and with no outlet to vent these destabilizing feelings. Nox didn’t care and pushed further.

“What’s the matter?” he asked, obnoxiously tilting his head around hers. “Cat got your tongue? Or could that be guilt? You did something to turn Angel, didn’t you?” She glared intensely at him with an unstable mixture of pain, anger, shame, and sorrow. Nox grabbed the collar of her shirt, and lifted her as he commanded, “Tell me, Slayer. Tell me what you-” She pushed him away—letting her drop to her feet—but he grabbed her hands and pulled her in closer. “Is that self-loathing I see in your ugly eyes? Hmm? You’re supposed to be some kind of hero and you can’t even speak? Just say it!”

“No!” she yelled, pushing him away before the frustrated girl swung wider than she should.

Xander caught Buffy’s arm and spun, bouncing her off his back and flipping her on her back. She grunted as she hit the cold grass, but recovered quickly. As the riled-up Slayer came for him, Nox threw his battleaxe and dagger to the side, alerting her that this would be a weaponless brawl. Facing a furious Buffy without the option to kill or lose, Xander was surprised by how composed he was.

Stepping into each other’s strike zone, Buffy launched a right straight that Xander leaned into, and blocked the powerful hit with his arm as he shoulder-checked her. Nox followed that with a forward kick to her stomach. She flew back, rolling on the ground before landing on her feet again. As she gripped her stomach, they glared at each other before blitzing once again.

The fighters traded blows effortlessly and impossibly fast. In the span of a second, each one could get two hits in. However, Xander quickly learned that Buffy still had more power than he did, making him wonder if she was always that strong or whether it was the anger fueling her. Slipping consecutive punches to his head—feeling the pressurized wind—Nox blocked the last punch with his left as he hit her face with his right. The fast-paced trading of blows and blocks moved them around the cemetery, using anything to get the advantage over the other.

Xander used the ring’s power continuously for speed, strength, agility, and above all, healing—because her attacks felt strong enough to rupture organs and break bones. He needed far more strength because her strength easily overpowered his own. He needed durability so his bones wouldn’t break just by blocking her powerful strikes. Even still, Buffy wasn’t the type to fight with fury, and that energy deterred her focus. She made mistakes, fell for feints, and felt more tired than she should actually be.

A kick from her had Nox spinning in the air, but he used the momentum to kick her legs out from under her. When she tried to roll over, he snatched her back, wrapping his arms around her neck. In a normal fight, there’d be no way Xander would ever get her in such a vulnerable position, but she wasn’t calm enough to fight properly. Buffy tried to bully herself free, using brute force to remove his arms.

It was working, making Xander think, ‘Fuck, she’s strong!’

Nox rolled them to the side, and they kept rolling on the dirt and grass until he was on top of her and they were facing each other. Nox’s legs were between hers to keep her from kicking him. His hands struggled to hold hers above her head, using all his strength and weight to keep her there while he demanded to know, “What did you do, Slayer?”

The dirtied blonde struggled to overpower him, then tried to headbutt him when his head was close enough. Again, Nox pushed Buffy’s fears and guilt to the surface by demanding to know, “Why did An- Angel t-turn?” When she wouldn’t stop struggling, he yelled, “Buffy!”

At her name, she tried to headbutt him again, but led with her chin, extending her neck out like a swan. Bitingly hard, their lips met instead, stunning Xander for several seconds, more than enough time for Buffy to flip him. She was now on top, and with his senses returned to him, Xander recalled what a previous Buffy had told him; about what the rush of a fight does to her.

She arched back to throw a punch at the same time he gripped her hips and slid her back onto his hardening cock. She hit him in the face, knocking more blood out of his nose, but it lacked a lot of her usual power. While Nox rapidly healed, he used that pain-filled energy to roll them over. On top once again, Xander thrust his restrained erection into Buffy’s clothed center.

“Mmnnn,” she moaned in her gritted maw.

Buffy’s hands reached for Xander’s neck and face, and he fought her as his pelvis kept pumping into hers. He could see her nipples poke through her thin shirt before he pinned her hands over her head and pushed in for the kiss. After a moment, she returned the kiss vigorously and her legs wrapped around his thrusting hips. Xander had a steady rhythm of rocking her entire body by smashing into her aching center as his one free hand began to roughly massage her left breast. A dirt-covered Buffy moaned into his bloody mouth when he tweaked her nipple and began meeting his thrusts. He let her hands go to massage her ass with his right hand while he moved his lips to kiss, suck, and bite at her sensitive neck.

When her moaning whimper mixed oddly with a long howl, a curious Xander took several seconds to slow down and realize that howling wasn’t coming from Buffy. It then dawned on him what that long howl meant. Xander pulled away, surprising her. They were breathing heavily as she stared at him, first in shock, then in embarrassment, and finally in shame, but he cut it off there.

“We, uh, hah, have to go,” he roughly voiced.

He got up and off of her, extending his hand. She eyed it for a moment before taking his unspoken offer, and being pulled to her feet. As they readjusted their clothing and brushed off dirt, blades of grass, and twigs Xander heard the howling again. He extended his hands to call back his weapons. They spun in the air before he caught and holstered them.

Buffy did the same with Slaymore, but when Nox began running, she asked, “What is it?”

“Did you hear the howling?” he asked.

Buffy looked around in confusion before hesitantly answering, “Uh… yeah?”

Xander turned to her as they ran. At her strained, flabbergasted half-smile, Nox rolled his glowing eyes. As they ran toward his scrambler, Xander told her, “Werewolf.”