Chapter Fifty-Seven - The Wrong Sort of Nap

Maple tried to look on the bright side of things.

It wasn’t easy for her to do that, but with a bit of effort, she could manage. Big Sister Emily was very important and very busy. She couldn’t be there with Maple every day, after all, and it was normal that Maple would have to take care of some things without her big sister’s help. If she wanted to be a big girl, then she’d need to learn how to take care of herself.

The thing was, Maple didn’t want to be a big girl, she wanted to be a small one that Big Sister Emily could grab and hug and one who could cuddle with her sisters.

She shook her head and put on a brave face. No. She was Maple. A brave villain working with the best super villain ever. She wasn’t about to get teary-eyed just because Big Sister didn’t have time for her.

“Hey, kiddo, you ready to go?” Alea Iacta asked.

Maple glanced up, then nodded. “Yes, I’m ready,” she said.

Today, she and Alea and Trinity were going to head out to buy some stuff! That was going to be fun. Maple had so many projects swimming in her mind all the time. Every time she looked at something she could think of a dozen ways to break it apart and make something new with it. So far she’d been careful not to have a repeat of the Toaster Gun but she still made a few small and useful items.

The toilet paper dispenser in the train’s bathroom was now automatic and rolled out a number of squares based on the amount of sound generated while in the bathroom (she was still fine-tuning it). And it could change toilet paper rolls itself, like the way shells were loaded into a battleship’s main gun.

The kitchen’s sink used to only produce lukewarm water. Now it could make everything from ice to water-based plasma! (They’d been learning about the different states of matter in school!). Also, instead of having a big tank that needed to be refilled, the train now had a big tank that filled itself up by pulling water out of the air.

Mostly, her new gizmos were little things. Stuff that Big Sister probably wouldn’t even notice, but that Maple thought could make their lives better. She didn’t have much to work with, but that would change after their trip.

Big Sister had given Alea Iacta a big stack of bills and told him to buy whatever she wanted until they ran out.

Maple was practically shaking. She was so excited. They were going to the dollar store! She could build so many things from the stuff there!

“Alright,” Alea Iacta said. He shrugged on a coat and then put on a baseball cap with the name of the school Emily went to on the front. “If anyone asks, I’m like... your uncle or something.”

Trinity grinned. “You could be our big bro,” she said.

“No, I’d really rather not,” Alea replied.

Maple tilted her head to the side as she thought about it. Why wouldn’t he want to suddenly have five new sisters? She’d been born with four, and it was fantastic. “You could be our daddy,” she said, offering up another option.

Alea recoiled. “No! No, just... absolutely not. Please never even suggest anything of the sort. In fact, scrub the word from your vocabulary.”

Maple shrugged. She didn’t know how to do that, but she was sure she could make something for it. Almost instantly she had plans in her mind for a massive machine that would erase everyone on Earth’s knowledge of the word ‘daddy.’ It would be tricky to make though, she needed a lot of stuff for that, like at least three dollar store’s worth of stuff.

It wasn’t a weapon though, so she’d be allowed to make it if she wanted.

“Alright, are you two ready to go?” he asked before grinning. “Or is it more like you one-and-one-third?”

Trinity eyed him suspiciously. “That’s a dad joke,” she said.

“Okay, first of all, not all wordplay is a dad joke. Second, no, just no.” He glanced at Maple and Trinity. “Are you coming dressed like that?”

Maple didn’t know if there was anything wrong with her outfit. She had a nice pastel pink skirt and a paler pink blouse, and of course her trusty lab-coat. “Yes?” she asked.

“Alright. Well, at least it hides the tail. Here.” Alea opened a closet near the train’s exit and found a pale blue beret. He placed it onto Maple’s head. “To hide your ears,” he said.

“Oh, I found a hat in the trash I can wear!” Trinity said. She reached into her dollar-sign bag--which she was going to leave behind because it was part of her villain/hero persona--and pulled out a ratty baseball cap.

“What about your tail?” Alea asked.

“What about it?” Trinity asked. She had jeans on, with a hole at the back for her bushy black-and-white tail.

“Nevermind. Alright, let’s head out.” Alea Iacta said. He helped Maple down from the final step out of the train, but Trinity just jumped down the gap with a big oof on landing. She instantly bounced back to her feet with a cheer. “What did I do to deserve this?” Alea muttered.

They headed out of the underground through one of the hidden shafts that Alea Iacta had found. The moment they were out, they started to walk along the sidewalk on their way towards the nearest shopping area. They came to the first intersection they had to cross and waited while the little stick figure went from red to green.

“Um,” Maple said. She fidgeted with her hands.

“Yeah?” Alea asked.

“Uh, Mister Alea? I mean, uncle? I think we’re supposed to hold hands when crossing the street?” Maybe if she phrased it as a question it wouldn’t be so bad?

Alea looked at her, then frowned. “Seriously?” he asked.

“Yeah, old man, don’t you know anything?” Trinity asked. “Now hand over those digits.”

“Digits? You mean my fingers? That's not how... nevermind.” He let his hands drop and Maple carefully held onto his index and middle finger as they crossed the road. Alea’s attitude improved when they crossed some girls who were about Big Sister’s age and they made cooing sounds while looking at Maple and Trinity. “Alright, maybe this isn’t the worst thing in the world,” he said. “Like having a dog, but more annoying.”

Their first stop was the dollar store. Alea Iacta kept a firm hold on Trinity, which prevented Maple’s sister from darting around and making a mess of things. Maple, in the meantime, asked how much money she had to work with and then very carefully picked a few things from the shelves.

Sometimes she had to shyly point to something that was too high for her to grab and Alea would pick it up and toss it into their cart.

She didn’t get nearly as much stuff as she wanted to, but by the time they’d gone through every alley the cart was halfway full of all sorts of stuff.

“Don’t,” Alea said at some point when he caught Trinity reaching for a candy bar. “I’m basically running on fumes here. Half the reason I agreed to come was to steal a bit of luck from people out here. So don’t push it, alright?”

They paid for the stuff, and soon they left the store with big bags full of all sorts of neat things. Universal remotes, a few of those crack-back cars, some water guns and plenty of arts and crafts supplies.

Maple could build so many things with what she had already, and she still had a third of her spending money left!

The hardware store seemed like an obvious place to check out, but it turned out to be a bust. There were tons of good things there, but mostly they were big things. While she really wanted to buy some generators, and she could do a lot with plumbing stuff, it was all a bit much for her budget.

The hobbyist shop was a better bet though. It was down on a quieter street and had plenty of things on sale that she picked up. Little tools and paints and glues.

“Happy?” Alea asked as they left. Her budget was down to the single digits. Maple was going to spend it on candy for herself and Trinity and Alea, as thanks for helping her so much.

“Yes!” she said as she exited the shop.

And then, out of nowhere, someone grabbed her from behind.

Maple didn’t know what happened, but there was a swishing sound. Rough hands grabbed her from behind, and she heard Trinity use one of the forbidden words very loudly before someone grunted and said “she bit me!”

Then the world went dark.

***