After talking to Paige, I came to my bed chambers. I sat on the bed and struggled to process what had happened. Paige had kissed me. Moments after I had returned to my room Helena burst into the room. Did she know what I did?

"Brenna, I have word on Jasper. I know you care a great deal for him, so I thought I should tell you myself." She said with tears in her eyes.

"What's wrong, Helena?"

"No one has seen Jasper or Sten in over a week."

I stared at my reflection in the vanity. My body trembled, and my eyes were bloodshot. I hadn't slept the night before. I stayed up, pacing and worrying for Jasper.

I was so desperate to find some miracle that could bring him home. I went to the library in the middle of the night to read about the orc religion. As usual, I found no answers, only literature that refers to the fall from light.

I thought I'd pray to their gods to ask for protection for both of them, but according to their books, their gods abandoned them after the fall from light. I was still confused about what that even meant.

I didn't go to the kitchen today because I was too worried for Jasper. I had denied my feelings for him. Now I may never have the chance, to be honest with myself or him. I went to the waterfalls and sat down at the edge.

I ran my fingers across the ground, trying to feel his essence from the time we spent here. The grass wasn't as lush as it once was. The blades were dry and turning yellow. Fall was approaching now.

I brought my knees to my chest and buried my face into my dress. I would give anything for Jasper to be okay. After a while, I pulled myself back together and breathed out shakily. I wiped at my cheeks and forced myself on my feet.

I hiked up the skirt of my dress and waded into the water. I hadn't spent much time out here since I was taken, but I needed to today. I felt closest to Jasper here.

I walked around a bit and looked down at the dull river stones distorted by the small ripples in the water. I watched the movement of the water until something caught my eye. I saw a rock that stood out from the plain ones surrounding it.

Its surface was streaked with various colors of green, burnt umber, and amber. I leaned down and carefully plucked it from the water to look at it closer. I slid my fingers across it. The river had made it smooth.

Then it dawned on me; the stone I had found amongst all the others was a jasper. I wondered if it was a coincidence and seemed ironic, but I had to let myself hope. I pressed the cold stone to my lips and closed my eyes.

At that moment, I decided to take it as a sign. A sign that Jasper would find his way home to his people and me. I wouldn't make the mistake of denying my feelings for him again. I tucked the stone away for safe keeping and headed back inside.

I lay down in my bed and pulled a fur around me to get comfortable. It was getting late, and I was exhausted. Jasper and Sten were still nowhere to be found, and I stayed worried sick. I hadn't been sleeping because of it.

I pushed my hand under my pillow and pulled out the stone. I stored it at night to keep it close by. I held it between my forefinger and thumb, feeling the smooth surface.

"Where are you, Jasper?" I whispered.

My eyes burned, wanting to cry, but I couldn't. I didn't know until recently that it was possible to weep so much that one could run out of tears. I was startled by a light knock at the door. I stood up and pulled the fur around me since I was only wearing a chemise.

This was an unusual time for any servants to come. It had to be nearly eleven in the evening by now. I rushed over to the door and cracked it open hesitantly. It was Helena. She looked frazzled and was also in her bedroom clothing.

She brushed a few stray hairs from her forehead and opened her mouth. She was urgent to speak to me.

"Jasper, they found Jasper and Sten."

I froze. I wanted to feel relieved, but I could tell by Helena's mannerisms that something was wrong.

"Is he... are they okay!" I nearly shouted at her.

"I don't know, dear. A servant girl told me they just got back. Both of them were taken to the healer."

"Can I go to him?" I pleaded.

She paused. "There's no telling what condition Jasper is in, but it wouldn't hurt to try. She may ask us to leave if it's serious."

I didn't think to cover up any better than I already was. My soul was aching to just lay eyes on him. To see that he was alive, to know if he was okay.

I held fur around me for some decency and took Helena's arm. She was trembling just as much as I was.

During my time with her, I learned she loved many of the Orc as if they were her own. Especially Jasper. She had been worried sick too.

We hurried down the corridor to the stairs. I've only been to the healer once, so I couldn't remember how to get there.

I only knew it was on the first story of the castle. As it turns out, the infirmary was in the West wing. It didn't take up the entire first story. It was based mainly near the northern walls of the wing.

Much of the southern walls of castle are built into the mountainside, so there weren't many south-facing windows. Since the infirmary had a wall facing the north side, there was window upon window down the wall.

Under each window was an identical bed on iron frames and done up with white linens. Helena and I stopped at the door and scanned the room.

It was dark. The only light came from a few lit candles on bedside tables and a large hearth at the far end of the ward.

Once I laid eyes on him, I couldn't stop myself. It was second nature to me. I let go of Helena's arm and nearly ran to him.

He laid shirtless on one of the beds. He looked odd in it because it was nearly too small for his large body. His eyes were closed, and his face contorted in discomfort.

He was being tended to by the healer. She was mixing up some concoction. When I got over to him, I stopped a few feet away.

"Jasper..." I said softly.

"He's not awake right now, my lady. He's wounded badly. You both should come back in the morning."

I studied his face, wanting to make sure it was really him. Sweat glinted off his strained forehead.

"Could I please sit with him a while," I begged? "We've been so worried."

The healer sighed and gave in; I quickly pulled a chair beside Jasper. I couldn't wait a moment longer; I leaned over and gently kissed him. His thick lashes fluttered against his rough cheekbones.

I sat back to observe him. He barely opened his eyes and looked at me for a few seconds. The corner of his lip curved into a weak smile before he was gone again.

I wasn't going to leave his side. I held onto his hand and laid my head on the edge of the bed. I might actually sleep tonight.