Dear Wolf,

The document I plan on writing is rather long and it will most likely be very boring. I hope you read the whole thing, and I hope I manage to finish it.

Sky Wolf, your birthmother, was born four centuries before you were. She was the sixth daughter of the ninety-seventh Wolf Empress of the Empire of Elf, Maple Wolf, better known as the Bloodthirsty Wolf to the neighboring races of man.

The woman’s most notable achievement was that she was in a certain, loathsome man’s good book and that her mother had nurtured the said monster.

As I’ve said previously, Sky Wolf was born as the sixth daughter and the most intelligent child of her Empress Mother. She was able to get a grasp of her environment and future prospects before she’d turned twelve.

For that she had to thank her guardians and maids, who recognized her to be a bright child and explained in detail the previous history of her family.

As such, when she was first presented to the Empress Mother at the age of fifteen she had already polished her act perfectly.

She acted docile and slow of wit, so that the elders of her biological family wouldn’t strangle her before she had the chance to develop.

She was fortunate that the servants which had raised her were aware of their situation and did their best to help her, and by association themselves, stay alive. By the time Sky Wolf’s talent at scheming and Druidism were discovered, she had already poisoned her two eldest sisters and established a faction consisting of her original supporters, as well as the supporters of the sisters she had murdered.

In a short and bloody decade, Sky Wolf managed to kill off all of her elder sisters, as well as the two younger ones. In case you are curious, only three of Sky’s sisters were truly any threat to her. The rest had to die because that was what the rules of succession of the royal family dictated.

Our kind believes that in the ruling clan only one daughter may stay alive. As for men, those would form branch clans and nobody really cared about them, unless they were married to competent noblewomen.

Just like that, Sky Wolf had stained her hands with the blood of her seven sisters before she had turned forty. The blood of numerous supporters, guards and soldiers was never recorded, nor were they of any importance, since the imperial succession was used to keep the number of plebs under control.

By successfully bringing the succession to a close and after waiting a couple of months to confirm that her mother’s latest pregnancy resulted in a wastrel male child and not another rival, Sky Wolf was crowned Heir Apparent at the tender age of forty-one. Half a century later, she had assumed the position of the Empress after forcing her mother to retire due to old age.

Once Sky Wolf became Empress, she had spent a bloody century to consolidate her rule and get rid of any dissidents. Before she had even noticed it, she was two hundred and fifty years old and it was time to start grooming a successor. Over the next century Sky Wolf had several children, and according to high elven custom, all of them with different men.

She took care that all of her mates held the title of Lonely. This was once again done in accordance with the customs of the high elves, and just like her mother she expected her daughters to strangle one another until only one was left.

This was not just the tradition exclusive to the royal lineage, but rather of all high elven noble households. An average woman would give birth to a dozen or two children in her lifetime. The population was kept in check by a large number of internal conflicts. During successions of various houses nobles ended up with only one successor and a large number of commoners died as they served as troops in their internal battles.

Unfortunately all of the children Sky Wolf had given birth to were male and thus she had no successor. Decades passed and at one point the World Power of the elves, the man her grandmother had created and her mother fawned over, had come to seek her out.

He was known throughout the empire as a lascivious man with hundreds of children he didn’t care about. However this wasn’t true. While this person was indeed consuming a large number of women on a monthly basis, he did this because he was using a secret art which allowed him to snatch bits of the souls from the women he’d mated with.

As you already know, when a man and a woman join to create a new life they both have to contribute a portion of their own souls to bring a new one into this world.

That bastard Eagle found a technique which would suck the piece of the soul the woman was supposed to contribute. Then he would refine it in order to increase the power of his own soul. Sky Wolf knew this because it was one of the secrets her mother had told her when she had succeeded her. Eagle went as far as to acknowledge bastards of many men as his own just to cover up his tracks. If his secret was out, even if he was the most powerful man in the world he was bound to die to the greed of those who coveted such a heretical technique.

After encountering a bottleneck he couldn’t break through, Eagle set his sights on the current Empress, who was a Lonely grade Druid.

Publicly he claimed that as the protector of the realm he should be the one to sire the Heir Apparent and future Empress. In reality, all he wanted was to steal a fragment of her soul in order to advance his own.

Unlike naive lesser women, Sky refused outright. In theory this technique stole enough Soul Force to make a new life, but in practice she had observed that it was an unnatural art which would completely halt the development of the victim’s soul.

For Sky that would mean the permanent end on her path as a True-Namer and Druid. Not just that, it would also shorten her lifespan for a bastard man she despised.

She never dreamed that that madman would stage a rebellion without caring about his race. He freed all the political prisoners and unwanted people from their sentences and then staged a short but bloody war, killing, raping and robbing the members of the Wolf clan.

My mind grows dull, while my thoughts are becoming more and more erratic, and this document grows long. I don’t even recall why I spoke of myself in third person back when I started writing. I’ve already fallen asleep several times reading what I have written previously without adding anything new. From now on, I will only read the latest paragraph I have written. Otherwise I’m afraid I will never finish this letter. I’m sorry if some things don’t make sense.

Our clan had seven Lonely Wolfs. All of them, save for me, had died. I fled after being grievously wounded by Eagle. I fled and hid in the wild lands of my empire for a decade until I found myself in the border region of the Empire of Elf and Empire of Human.

I was certain I would meet my end in these wild lands, alone and exhausted after being on the run for such a long time. Yet, in an unexpected twist of fate, I met an old enemy instead. At first I expected that he would end my life, but surprisingly he took me in and helped me stabilize my condition as much as possible. To this day I don't know why.

That man was known as the Lonely Thunder in the Empire of Elf, a human equivalent of a Lonely One called Lord of Thunder by the humans. He was a great enemy of the Empire of Elf, yet that is what I had become as well.

He told me what had become of my former domain. The more I heard the more enraged I grew. The proud empire of my youth was reduced to a shadow of its former glory by the civil war. It was only then that I realized why I wasn’t chased by every warrior of the empire. They were too busy slaughtering each other in a fashion much more brutal than imperial succession ever was.

Lonely Thunder told me that Northshield was gathering forces to invade the Empire of Elf when a coup was staged by the Duke’s brother who was backed by Eagle.

Things in the human court grew complicated and eventually Lonely Thunder fled into exile.

While talking he and I came up with a ridiculous plan. A plan that could be described as a wild stab in the dark, if I’ve ever heard of one.

We decided to make a successor who would hopefully settle our grudges and slay Eagle. Making and giving birth to a child for such a purpose seems shameful to me now that I’ve come to know you, but the me from back then didn’t have such sentiments.

Naturally we expected problems to happen. A child born out of two people with such terrifying lingering injuries was bound to have a weak soul. But with my family’s constitution you had a good chance of walking the path of Internal Energy Refining, and the path of Body Refinement wasn’t completely impossible either.

Whichever path you choose, I have ample resources for you. For safety reasons I will not write any more hints. If you are fated, you will find these resources, if not then live a happy life. Maybe one of your offspring will have destiny with that treasure.

Unexpectedly, after taking care of you, holding you, feeding you on my teat I’ve felt something I’ve never felt before.

According to custom, your older siblings were kept away from me and raised by servants, so for the first time ever I experienced what it was to be a mother. As for my other children, the first time I laid my eyes on them was when they were fifteen years old. They were complete strangers to me, as well as utter disappointments.

With you everything was different. I had to feed you and wash you and change your diapers.

With every passing day my feelings for you grew stronger. Yet I couldn’t help but feel ashamed for having such feelings.

They appeared in me, a woman who had never had a real family before. In a woman who prostituted herself to her stepfathers and plotted with them so that they would stab their own daughters in the back.

Those feelings sprouted in a woman who strangled her youngest sister with her bare hands as soon as the girl had turned fifteen years old. As soon as it was fair and legal to kill her as she joined the contest for the throne.

I am a wretched creature which comes from such a background, and yet, when those tiny digits grasped my finger for the first time, I couldn’t hold back my tears. I couldn’t help but doubt my entire existence, as well as the decision my ancestors had made.

Writing these vile things is difficult. Even more so as I watch you stumbling while leaning on the wall. Whenever I look into those bright eyes of yours I have an eerie feeling. It’s as if the one looking at me isn’t a baby boy, but someone special I guess? I can’t make any sense of it. I can bet it’s my mind and guilt playing tricks on me.

Still, I have to look at you and think of my past foolishness. The defective instrument of revenge I’d originally seen is now just a boy. A bright, beautiful boy that cries, has nightmares, while I have an urge to comfort and protect you.

I can’t put into words how much I wish I could see you grow into a man. I think that in my dreams I sometimes see your future.

Sometimes you’re the ravager I had originally sought to create. In your rage and quest for vengeance you tear down the ten Empires of Man. Rivers of blood flow through the imperial palace of humans as you stand on mountains of corpses all alone, with a chilly gaze in your eyes. Those are my nightmares, in which I see you hurt and broken, infested with hatred which goes beyond words.

Sometimes I see you laughing, surrounded by women, with my grandchildren running around like a pack of little wolves they should be. This is the future I dearly wish for you, my child.

My symptoms are growing much worse. It’s hard to even pay attention to what I’m doing. Even watching you play now seems to strain my brain.

I hate myself when I sleep. Instead of watching over you I waste my time. I don’t regret the damage my soul took, but by gods how I wish for more time.

How I wish you didn’t worry about me. When I see fear in those tiny eyes, it’s tearing me inside.

I don’t know whether it’s better for me to die now, or to prolong your agony.

I have to finish this.

I no longer care about revenge, the empire or those that wronged me. That woman had died and a new one had taken her place. I am a mother of a single bright star and all I want is an equally bright future for you, my beloved son. Not just because you are my only kin in the world. No. I love you so dearly and yet I have to leave you alone.

He told me I’ve slept for three weeks this time. Gods, I don’t want to die.

Wolf, my baby, take care of yourself. Be free. Be happy. Do not let anyone restrain you or force you into doing anything against your will. Stay alive and stay well. Know that a woman once existed who dearly wished to see you grow into a fine young man, yet I have to leave you behind in such a heartless manner.

Your undeserving mother

Wolf’s hands shook. His face was wet from tears. And as he read the three final words he felt his head spin.

This was my mother. Wolf thought, trying to calm down. She was much more straightforward than Dad.

The admission of all her faults and confession about Sky’s misdeeds shocked Wolf. It had completely shattered the misconception of the warm benevolent woman from his hazy memories.

However, even with his illusions shattered, Wolf felt no resentment towards his mother. What’s more he felt even more love and respect for the woman who dared commit such words to paper.

Closing his eyes, with the letter still in hand, Wolf thought about everything he had read and about the words his mother had erased.

The paper had visible gashes, probably from when his mother fell asleep while writing. Wolf wanted to restore everything to its original state, but didn’t dare to, in case the end result became an empty parchment. There were probably mundane ways of repairing the letter, but Wolf would never entrust this letter to another. As for himself, Wolf still had the haunting feeling he couldn’t properly hammer in a nail, let alone repair damaged paper.

Another thing that came to Wolf’s mind was the old Archdruid. The letter Wolf had just read corroborated some of the old man’s words.

The letter confirmed another thing, which didn’t cross Wolf’s mind. That was that Archibald had never truly understood the woman who gave birth to his child.

Wolf could see that his mother wasn’t born a monster. Rather, she did whatever she had to do to stay alive and live with dignity.

As soon as she was given a chance at leading a normal life she’d become a loving mother. She didn’t even make a single request in her letter. Rather she only gave her blessing and well wishes.

Ironically it was Archibald who had placed a far greater burden on his son’s shoulders, not that Wolf minded it. After all, all his father had done was give him a list of names, the decision on what to do with the people on that list was left up to Wolf.

Wolf was so engrossed in his thoughts that he failed to hear the knocking and the voice behind the door of his room. The door opened suddenly, and Wayde barged into Wolf’s bedroom.

“Are you all right man?” the youth asked worriedly. “Anna’s waiting for us in the hallway, she wants us to have dinner together.”

Wolf jumped as soon as his roommate suddenly appeared. Then, a moment later he retrieved the wooden seal and the letter into his Ring of Holding.

Wolf acted quickly and hid the items before Wayde could really see what it was Wolf held in his hand. Considering Wayde’s hatred for the elves, there was no telling what he would do if he’d found out that Wolf was a part of their former royal lineage.

“That sounds great! I don’t have to cook, right?” Wolf asked, but his voice was all cracked up and shaky. Him cleaning his face with a handkerchief which had appeared in his hand didn’t help his cheerful act.

Seeing the sight, Wayde made a sour face.

“Are you unwell?” he finally asked.

“I’m fine. Let’s go and have some dinner. I’m a beggar, so someone has to pay for my meal.” Wolf tried to make a joke, but his mood was clearly anything but light.

“All right, dinner is on me this time. The food in the cafeteria is free for us students, so treating you isn’t all that hard.” Wayde laughed in an unnatural, hollow way and left the room.

“Great, I’m starving!” Wolf followed after Wayde and decided to think about certain things later.