Death Cap - Twenty-Five - When Things Go Well, Prepare for Trouble

In the next couple of weeks, I started to concoct something of a plan.

Bet was an excellent salesgirl. I set her up near the dungeon and watched her go. It took a bit for her to work past her initial jitters, but after that, she was on fire. She knew people, both with the gathering teams full of kids, and with the other gatherers. That helped her get to know others, who in turn treated her fairly well.

When a few foremen came to poke about, Bet pointed them out to me and I smoothly offered them some free supplies.

There was one dicey situation where this bigger man came over and started talking about how much we were making and how we ought to ‘share’ it with him. I was considering dropping a Dead Man’s Cough on him when the bullies showed up and intimidated him away.

Bribes were worth it, sometimes.

So, after a few trips to accompany her, I let Bet take care of things on that front herself. I needed to up the production in my farm, but that was the work of an afternoon or two. Soon I’d be able to keep someone like Bet going every day of the week without a hitch.

With a few days to prepare, I’d be able to supply a second seller, which meant it was time to start expanding. Stew helped me find a carpenter who could build a table like the one we were using, and the old man who sold me my first lantern was overjoyed when I ordered two more and enough oil to last a month.

I still had money to spare after all that.

Some of it went into our home, buying a few things that were nicer. More padding for the cots we had, nicer furniture and the services of a chimney sweep, which as it turned out we desperately needed.

My mom seemed to appreciate the changes, and it gave her a bit of energy to clean the house up some. I offered her a job selling skewers for me, but she turned me down. Technically she earned more than what I was paying Bet already, and the work she did was probably lower risk, in some ways.

So, some of my problems were fading while others, unfortunately, grew.

The big issue was dungeon-related.

I couldn’t dive into the Ditz dungeon and hit the bottom floors. Not without a lot more experience, a lot more gear, and maybe some outside help. But, what I could do, was hire a team to go down for me.

That was a complicated option, but it was an option. It required a lot of money and some contacts in the right places, but delver teams could just be hired out. If I got one to lead me to the bottom of the dungeon, then that was it, I could do the ritual and then... then we’d see.

Sitting at the workbench at my little farm, I ran through the numbers. I didn’t know the cost of a delver team, but I could guestimate it. Based on how much surplus I was making from my little business at the moment, it would take four years to earn enough to hire a middling team to escort me down.

That was a bit much. I wanted revenge now, not in half a decade. More, if anything went wrong and I needed the funds to help. I had no safety cushion, no insurance, and nothing to fall back on.

I rubbed at my nose and tried to ward off a headache. There was a solution here to all of my problems, but it was out of reach. I could either dismiss it, try to find another solution, or I could try to solve the problems with this solution.

Problem: I didn’t have the money to hire the people I would need in order to reach the bottom of the dungeon.

How could I solve that?

I leaned back, then tossed my pen onto the table. “Guess it’s time to do more crime,” I said. “Come on, Sir Nibbles, we’re going to go see the union again.”

Nibbles stared up at me from where he’d rolled into a ball, then with a surprisingly quick motion, he jumped onto my arm and clawed his way up to my shoulder where he wrapped himself around my neck.

I hissed and rubbed at my arm. “One day you’re going to break skin and then I’ll get some messed up infection and lose my arm,” I muttered. “That’s the same day that I’ll eat badger soup with my remaining arm.”

Sir Nibbles hissed back, and it sounded an awful lot like laughter.

I grabbed a few things, filled a satchel with some edible mushrooms that were past their prime, then slunked out of my farm and across the city.

Keeping my head down, I made sure to walk fast and not attract any attention. There was a particular way of walking that was common in the slums, a hunched back shuffle that was surprisingly quick and told anyone that looked that you weren’t interested in their business as long as they didn’t get into yours.

With the pace I set, it didn’t take long for me to reach the warehouse where the union was holed up. It had the usual assortment of young men hanging around, but they were busier today than usual. A long cart was stationed out front, and they were loading boxes into the back of it.

I paused a bit to the side, where I was sure I wouldn’t be in anyone’s way, and just watched for a moment until I spotted someone familiar walking out next to a pair of young men who were listening attentively.

“Hey, Gary,” I said.

The young man turned and spotted me in a blink, then he smiled. “Well, if it isn’t mushroom... person.”

“Person?” I asked.

“Uh, well, yeah,” he replied before squinting at me. “Say, this might be a little strange, but are you a boy or a girl? We have something of a betting pool going.”

I made a disgusted face at him. “I don’t think it matters, either way you’re way too old for me.”

“What?” he asked.

A few of the boys overheard and started to chuckle.

“No, I wanted to know... you know, what’s in your pants.”

“I’m wearing overalls,” I pointed out. This was fun! “Also, that’s a little rude.”

“That’s not an answer,” Gary snapped.

I shrugged, then reached into my overalls and pulled out a mushroom. “Mostly it’s fungus.” Gary looked at me askance, and it was everything I could do not to laugh. “Hey, I came here to chat, and I have some food to drop off. Did the last mushrooms I brought serve?”

“Hmm? Oh, yeah, the cooks loved them. We had soup the next day. It was pretty good. Thanks for that.” He half-turned and gestured the boys on. “Who’re you looking to talk to? Dregs? I don’t know what you two got up to last time, but he was in a good mood for a week, which is concerning.”

“We just went out for a walk,” I said.

He didn’t believe me, and he wasn’t going to push because I don’t think he really wanted to know. With a nod of his head he gestured into the warehouse and I followed him in. They were moving, it seemed, the dividers going down and everything being packed up.

“What’s going on here?” I asked.

“We’re changing locations,” he replied. “It’s just sensible. We’ve been here too long already. New place means that the bureaucracy needs to play catch up. You won’t believe how often the bullies will hit a place we occupied six months before, just because the people behind the desks are seven layers deep into the paperwork and a year behind.”

“Huh,” I said. That didn’t bode well for the smooth running of the city. Not my problem though. “Anyway, I didn’t come over just to feed you guys. I had a request of sorts.”

He nodded. “What are you looking for? The union can help with a bunch of things, but we’re in the middle of something right now, if you can’t tell.”

I nodded along. “Yeah, it’s nothing too urgent. I’m looking for work.”

He frowned. “Your little mushroom business not working out?”

“Oh no, it’s going really well. I meant more... the kind of work that gets Dregs excited.”

He eyed me. “You know what you’re asking?”

“Yes. Are we going to do that thing where we use euphemisms instead of saying things like assassinate, murder, or whatever?”

Gary shook his head. “I don’t know if you’re a boy or a girl, but either way, you’re one scary kid, you know that?”

I grinned, then grinned harder when he shivered.

***