My hand stings at impact, Jackson's face jerking to the side as my palm cracks against his skin. I can't believe I just did that. Mg eyes widen in disbelief as I take in my brother hurt expression, his hand pressing over the spot I hit him.

Oh my god.

"Jackson, I-I-"

"Forget it," he whispers, turning around and leaving the house. That's what I wanted, right? I wanted him to leave in the first place, so why do I feel so guilty?

"Oh my god," I cover my hand over my mouth. My vision becomes blurry from the tears filling my eyes as I watch my brother peel out of the driveway. I really fucked up. He may have disrespected me, but I've never put my hands on him like that ever.

Sure, we used to fight as kids, but I've never once hit him that way. I was malicious and cold hearted when I did it, and I regret it.

"Baby," Colten coos, pulling me to his chest. I bury my face on his skin, my mind still in a state of shock.

"I can't believe I just did that," I say still in shock. Colten lays his chin on my head, his hand rubbing up and down my back. "How could I have done that?"

I think Colten just lets me speak to myself, that or he really doesn't know what to say. It's probably both.

We both lounge out on the couch while watching Colten's favorite show; Ridiculousness. I still have the guilt from the earlier events, but I try to push that to the back of my mind.

I don't like this show at all, it's stupid really. People purposely do stupid stuff and when they get hurt they send it to these people. And then everyone starts laughing about it, it's sick.

Suddenly, my phone beeps signally a text. Colten goes to grab it, but once he's mid-way there, his back tenses.

"What's Adam Donaldson doing texting you?" Oh shit.

•••

I pick at my hot lunch that is actually pretty cold, feeling more like shit than usual.

"Nikki," Brittni whispers sympathetically. "He's not mad at you."

She's lying. I know she is by the way Jackson has been ignoring me ever since that morning. He won't even look at me, and honestly I don't blame him. Monster Nikki is not pretty.

"Don't lie," I shake my head, pushing away my lunch that I honestly can't stand.

I have no idea where Colten is right now, but he's no where in the lunch room. I assured him multiple times that Adam and I don't even talk anymore, and even , though he said okay, I know he's not. It didn't help that Adam was asking me about what I was doing.

Jackson is here, but he isn't talking with his friends like he usually does.

Our whole group has fallen apart. Colten and Jackson are no longer friends because of my relationship with him. Jackson and I aren't talking because I slapped him Saturday morning and Brittni and Jackson are in some type of fight. I think it's because of Colten and I. I hate knowing that we're affecting everyone.

"Where's Colten?" Speak of the fucking devil.

I roll my eyes, turning around to look up at the bitch queen.

"Somewhere you're not," I bite back with a bitter smile. Ever since that video was released, everyone has been looking at me with either disgusted looks or glares. Both for the same thing; I'm with Colten Mathews.

"Ha-ha," she crosses her arms over her chest, narrowing her eyes. "I thought you guys were like a thing."

"He's my boyfriend," I tell her. "We're not a thing we are dating."

She rolls her eyes with a sarcastic laugh. "Listen to me, you little sophomore, Colten's just using you, and once he gets what he wants he'll leave you high and dry."

I take a deep breath, standing up so we're now chest to chest. I'm a bit shorter than her, but that never stopped me before. Angelique may be a senior, but she is definitely not smarter than me, I can tell that much.

"Like he did with you?" I question, the whole lunch room is staring at our altercation now, 'oo's' and 'ahhs' sounding from them.

"Puh-lease," Angelique scoffs. "That's just what he tells everyone. He's actually been fucking me this entire time."

I shouldn't believe her. She's a conniving bitch that has a strange obsession with Colten, but I can't help the slight part of me that believes this could be true.

"You're lying," I state-matter-of-factly.

"But I'm not," she leans in closer with a sickly sweet smile on her lips. "He told me all about Adam texting you and how he thinks you're cheating on him so he decided to make it even."

Did he really do that? Could he really? Was Jackson right about Colten still keeping up with his player ways? I mean, how else would she know about Adam texting me? I didn't tell her and frankly, I haven't told anybody else.

"Don't worry, lil Nikki," she pouts mockingly. "It was never going to last anyway."

She walks away, I stare down at my food, Brittni tries talking to me and I get up, leaving the room.

All of this is just too much, way too much. I thought he and I were doing great, now I hear that he's actually been sleeping with Angelique the whole time. If that's even true, but how else would she know about Adams text to me? I just don't get it.

"Nikki!" It's Jackson, I don't need this right now. "Nikki, please stop."

"Just leave me alone," I ground out, my body fighting to reach the exit of the the school. I need to get out of here.

"Oh for gods sake," he snaps, grabbing my arm and pulling me to him. Concern and anger swirl in his eyes, making me look away. "Don't listen to what she says."

"I'm surprised you're even saying that," I roll my eyes, trying not to think of the lump in my throat. "You seem pretty convinced Colten hasn't changed."

He sighs. "I know what I said, Saturday, but-"

"Nikki?" My eyes snap over to the owner of the voice. Colten looks confused as he takes in Jackson and I talking civilly.

I look away, the emotion working its way up.

"What're you doing out here?" Don't answer.

"I don't think she wants to talk right now." Jackson's voice isn't condescending or anything, it's just slightly warning.

"I don't think it's your place to say," Colten growls. This is just great. The last thing I fucking need is Colten and Jackson fighting. "Why are you crying?"

I pull away from my brother, wrapping my arms around my body and staring down at the floor, before working up my courage.

"Have you been sleeping with Angelique?" Just saying the words makes bile rise up in my throat.

"What?" He asks, incredulously. "After everything I said and have done for you, you think I'm screwing Angelique?"

"Maybe she has a reason to," Jackson butts in. Great!

"I didn't fucking ask for your opinion." Colten is no longer guilty by the way we betrayed Jackson, I can tell. Anger is present in his stance and tone, giving off authority.

"Guys," I whisper, but they don't listen.

"She's my sister," Jackson points to himself. "I don't need you to ask me."

Colten is fuming. "What did you tell her? Huh?"

"I don't know what your talking about?" Jackson's rolls his eyes. Colten takes a few steps forward until the boys are chest to chest.

"You're trying to change her mind about me, right?" I shoves Jackson. "You're trying to manipulate her."

"Back the fuck off," Jackson growls, but Colten's already throwing a punch at his face.

"Stop!" I scream, getting in the middle and putting my hand on Colten's chest. I push him away from my brother with all my strength.

"You're a fucking liar!" Colten roars.

"Colten," I cry. "Please, stop."

Something in his eyes changes as he looks down at me. They soften and transform into the ones I know and love.

"It was Angelique, you bastard," Jackson booms. "She keeps saying that you've been fucking."

Colten closes his eyes and takes a step away from me. A sinking feeling fills my stomach as he pulls at his hair.

"You believed her?" He sounds hurt, so hurt and I have nothing to take away the pain.

"I-I don't know," I stutter. I did. I did believe her. I'm a horrible girlfriend.

"I fucking can't," his voice cracks, he paces, his hands still pulling at his hair. "I told you I fucking love you and you go and believe that shit?"

Yeah, stupid, Nikki.

"I'm sorry," I say ashamed. My brother is still beside us and I can't get over how awkward this conversation is with him there. He's probably enjoying every minutes of it, though.

"I fucked her once." I cringe. "I think you already know that."

I do.

"I do know that that," I nod.

"I'm going to go," Jackson grumbles, leaving the two of us alone. I'm glad for his departure, he was starting to make me anxious.

"I just don't know anything anymore," I finally let the tears fall. "I feel like everything is different and I love you so much-"

"Shh," Colten soothes, bringing me to his chest. I breathe in his calming scent, my nerves going down a notch. "Shits happening, baby, but we can't let it get to us."

He right. He's one-hundred percent right. All of these people knowing about Colten and I is making me feel all types of anxious. I know people are trying to break us up, I can tell, but I need to ignore it. It's the only way for Colten and me to last.

"I'm so sorry," I sniffle. "I love you, and I shouldn't have believed her."

"I love you," Colten kisses my head. "Nothing will change that. I'd never hurt you like that."

I know.

Angelique has a fucking obsession with me, that's not hard to tell. I'm just pissed she had to drag my Nikki into all this. I know my girlfriend is going through a hard time with her brother and her reasoning is clouded so I didn't hold it against her. The fact Angelique had the audacity to tell her these things really gets me. Fucking her was the worst mistake of my life.

Luckily, Nikki doesn't ask me were I was the entire lunch period. I'd have to tell her and that would put even more weight on her shoulders. I obviously needed to set this Adam guy straight. He was fucking texting Nikki and I don't find that okay.

"Donaldson?" He's standing at his locker like the fucking pussy he is, grabbing books and what not.

"Colten," he nods, swallowing hard. What did Nikki ever see in this guy? He's a fucking whimp that can't even look me in the eyes after texting my girlfriend.

"What were you doing talking to Nikki Saturday?" I question, standing tall, looking down on the bitch.

"I just asked what she was up to."

"Why?" Cut straight to the chase, Colten, that's the way to go. Refrain from punching his teeth out.

He shrugs.

"Listen here, Donaldson," I get closer to him, my chest slightly touching his. "If I ever hear about you texting my girlfriend asking how she is, what she's doing or even saying the fucking word 'hi' I'll break your jaw. Got it?"

Adams eyes are wide as he nods, I smirk, patting his shoulder some what harshly before walking off.

"See you at practice."

It's safe to say he shouldn't be talking to her anytime soon.

____________________