《He Never Loved Me (#Wattys2019)》Chapter 4
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I feel like I am alone; like I am beginning to become the type of girl who struggles to get through the day. I look so strong, yet feel so weak. Now the girl who has began to believe her own fake smile .
The world has turned against me, I cannot do anything but accept it. It feels as if I have been cast into a never ending eternity of pain, fighting like hell, trying to break free. But the pain has engulfed me, every time I fall, I fall 20 feet under.
I cried as if the ferocity of it might bring him back; as if by the sheer force of my grief the news would be undone. He was my first love, my only love and he could not just up and be gone. . .
I feel unwanted and unloved, constant feeling like I am too much. I care too much, give too much of myself to people who clearly don't deserve it. Maybe I even try too hard, I now understand disappointment too well.
After whirling about, unable to look through my puffy eyes at the photographs on the wall, I tumbled out of the door onto the rain-kissed street. Dissolved in the kind of despair that can take one's mind prisoner and never give it back. Once in the open I sank down to my knees in the middle of the street, bathed in the headlamps of the cars now static before me.
Ordinarily folks around would honk their horns in three seconds flat, but my wailing carried in that damp air, freezing them in place, helpless, just like me. . . The world turned into a blur, and so did all the sounds. The feeling. The smell of rain. Everything was just gone.
I paused trying to hold back the strange feelings rumbling inside me but couldn't. So many tears burst forth like water from a dam, spilling down my face. My chin trembled as if I was a small child. I breathed heavier than I ever had before. Gasping for air that simply wasn't there, throat burning in a silent scream. I was too broken to ever be loved again.
Constant battles with myself, unnecessarily tearing myself down. Living my life through quotes, holding on to anything that helps me feel less alone. I have become a close friend to pain and rejection.
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Cliché cliché the classic cancer cliché
A popcorn novel. wee woo wee woo im a pretty butterfly...or am I! dun dun dun
8 198Deals & Destiny
(A/N)I discovered that I can post fanfictions on this site so I decided to post the Familiar of Zero fanfic I made. Walking home from a friends house after watching the FoZ anime, our hero suddenly finds himself in a familiar summoning situation... only something interferes and he gets a few new advantages. Now, follow along as he breaks the show, builds a harem, and builds an empire all the while doing humorous, badass, and other Gary Stu stuff. Contains elements from both the anime and manga. Also yes, the MC is a bit OP, but it's okay because it's funny.
8 106My Life As A Creator
The shaji Ebnien Beixi sets out on a journey to find True Light and Dark. Recalled & narrated by Beixi.
8 158Serf
The Unbinding series Arc: Soil and Water Serf Taran is tired of being a healer. Everyone wants and demands all the time, and even his best friends aren't making things better. A new game gives him the opportunity to try out a new playstyle, finally allowing him the chance to create, instead of just helping others destroy. While the World Below offers unlimited possibilities for enterprise, Tee first needs to navigate the drama, schemes and downright shenanigans that happen whether he likes it or not. ** Note as of 26-Sep-2018 ** I have to take time out of writing Serf to finish editing Darkborn. I will resume it as soon as I can. Thank you for your patience. Catch me on twitter @mroysson for updates. --- This is the second book in my Unbinding series. There is no need to read the first one (Unbinding - The Dark Spiral - Darkborn). Some elements, however, will be more familiar to readers of my previous story. Cover image found on Unsplash, by user @jessecallahan Cover design by yours truly, @mroysson
8 101Magic of Paris circa 1995
Jeanine goes to Paris to study architecture. Luke and friends head to Paris under various personal agendas. Once Luke and Jeanine collide, Jeanine gains a tutorial via submersion into the secret society steeped in magic and magical powers. They call themselves Neo-Druids and they've vowed to serve community and life, even while on vacation thousands of miles from home.
8 187Blue Mage Strives for the Level Cap! Adapt!
After being invited to participate in the Beta run of a new Full-Immersion Virtual Reality RPG, Ardacen Winters and 1999 others learn that it is also a race to reach the level cap of one hundred. The prizes are grand, but the chance to be the first players in this new game might be worth more than the prizes themselves. This is a Lit-RPG, a humble homage to all the others who precede it and hopefully an inspiration to anyone with a story in their own head that needs to be shared.
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