Really, it was all too much for one mind to comprehend. The amount of trauma one person can deal with is only really so much. Especially when you feel as if you're all alone, drowning in it.

Esmerelda had always been used to being on her own. That was really why, despite her heartbreak over Regulus not telling her the truth about why he didn't return to Hogwarts, she was able to cope and function by herself.

There was something about being in that cave though... Something haunting that she knew would never leave her.

Sitting on the floor of Grimmauld Place, moments after her escape, Esme really began to understand how she couldn't deal with this by herself anymore. It was too much.

Where had her childhood gone? She was still a teenager after all.

Children weren't meant to be raised in the midst of a war, and teenagers weren't meant to fight in it. But, she supposed, wars were never just and fair.

All Esme knew was that she needed to survive this. Someone needed to remember all of the atrocities that had happened to ensure it never happened again.

So Esme had to keep going. She had to keep living and keep fighting, and she knew who exactly she was going to be living and fighting alongside.

Regulus Black finally let out a long, shaky breath. Every muscle hurt and his head was struck with a blinding pain so he could barely remember what had even happened. It took a moment for his eyes to adjust to the brightness of the kitchen before he looked down at Esme.

He was lying on his back in the cold, tiled floor, which did nothing to alleviate the aching of his entire body. Esme knelt over him, gripping onto his jumper as her head was buried into his chest.

After a minute of just watching the girl, his other senses kicked in and he realised she was hysterically sobbing.

"I can't believe you did this!" She cried, her face pressed harshly into his jumper as it soaked up her tears.

Regulus opened his mouth, trying to reply but his throat was too hoarse to force out any coherent words.

He coughed, causing Esme to slowly lift her head and look at him. He had only seen her in such a state once before - after they'd been branded with the Dark Mark.

"You're okay, you're alright. We're safe." Esme repeated, like a mantra. He wasn't sure if she was trying to convince him or herself.

"It's okay, you're alright. Oh my god, you're alright."

Esme couldn't completely believe it. He was there. He was in front of her. He was safe and alive. He was really, utterly and truly, unharmed.

"I love you so much, you daft idiot." She wiped some tears from her eyes.

Her hands still balled up his jumper as she fought to hold back her tears again, "I-I thought you'd... I wasn't sure if I'd managed to save you. I..." Esme's voice faltered as she knelt down to rest her head in the crook of his neck, wrapping her arms tightly around him.

"Esme..." Regulus' voice croaked out, "It's okay..."

Eventually her cries subsided and Esme sat up, looking down at him still lay on the floor. Regulus closed his eyes, starting to feel the effects of the potion subsiding. Finally he was starting to feel a little more like his usual self but he was still adjusting to what was happening and, of course, what had just happened.

"You, you idiot!" She exclaimed harshly, "You're a complete arse, Regulus Black! What was that?" She hit him in the side of the head.

"Ow!" He complained, rubbing where he'd just been struck, "You hit me. Why would you hit me?"

"Because you're an idiot! You-you terrified me... I thought I hadn't managed to save you."

Slowly, and with several grunts of discomfort, Regulus pushed himself up and looked at her, "Thank you... For coming and saving me. I didn't-I expected to die there."

All of the frustration Esme had been harbouring towards the boy had been effortlessly washed away. Though, she did feel quite guilty that it took them both risking their lives for her to realise there were bigger things at stake. She couldn't be less angry at Regulus for not telling her he wasn't returning to Hogwarts.

"If you dare do anything like that again... I don't know-I mean I'll have to come and save you, but then I'll kill you myself." Esme grumbled, prodding him in the chest as she tried to blink away more tears.

"Come here." Regulus wrapped his arms around the girl, pulling her into a tight embrace. They rested their heads together as they settled back into the comfort of being in each other's hold. Regulus couldn't even begin to fully process what had happened or how he felt - he was still running on adrenaline and his hands were starting to tremble.

"Now... How on Earth, exactly, did you end up in that cave in a zombie-like state?" She inquired.

He could feel the tension growing again within every muscle in his body as he thought back over what had happened. It was something he didn't want to relive, but he had to in order to make sure Esme was with him for the rest of the journey.

He took a shaky breath in, and hurried out his words, "Well, I knew the Dark Lord needed me for something, though I didn't know what. One day, maybe about a week after term started he called for me and asked if I had a house elf. He said he needed one, and would be taking mine for the day." Regulus explained, thoroughly uncomfortable but he continued nevertheless, "So Kreacher went, and when he returned that night - I think I nearly cried."

Esme took this short pause to glance across the room towards Kreacher, who was gripping some sort of shiny item in his hand as he silently hovered in the corner of the room.

"It was dreadful." Regulus shook his head, "I'd never seen poor Kreacher look so ill and upset. Eventually I coaxed him into telling me what had happened. The Dark Lord had taken him to this cave, used his blood to open an ancient magic door and made him drink this potion, so the Dark Lord could them hide this necklace at the bottom of the dish. After I realised what it was - rather, that took some looking up - I panicked and rushed to make Kreacher take me back to the cave immediately. He could apparate in to the island directly so we didn't have to go through the door. I told Kreacher he had to ensure I finished the potion and he had to take the locket straight away. Once he'd got the locket, I planted the fake locket I'd made in its place in the dish, and inside the locket was a letter I'd hurried through to the Dark Lord. I assumed I wouldn't be in a fit state to escape myself after drinking the potion and that once the Dark Lord read the letter I'd left, he would come hunting for me, so it didn't matter if I died."

His voice had grown hoarse again and started to croak. Even just talking for a few minutes straight was enough to wipe out what little energy he had managed to muster up. All he wanted to do was lie down and forget the whole dreadful ordeal had happened.

Esme almost couldn't believe the story. If it had come out of anyone else's lips she most certainly would have accused them of lying.

But she could see the deep rooted terror in Regulus' eyes - the kind that can't be faked.

Esme tangled her fingers in his hair and quietly asked, "At any point are you going to explain what the hell is all the fuss about this necklace?"

"Ah... That one's complicated." His shoulders tensed up slightly as he cleared his throat.

"Well as long as you've got an explanation." She mumbled.

Regulus took a deep breath a gulped before finally expressing, "The Dark Lord made a horcrux."

Esme pulled back, a frown etched over her features as she asked, "Made a what?"

Quite a while later, she sat on the sofa in the living room of Grimmauld Place and stared blankly at family history tapestry across the room.

"So... This might be a lot worse than I could have ever imagined." Esme combed her fingers absentmindedly through Regulus' hair with one hand as his head rest in her lap and he lay reclined across the sofa, his feet dangling over the end. With her other hand, she was gripping one of his hands over his chest.

"And that's only what I do know about horcruxes. I could barely find any information, and what people have written is brief at best. There could be so much more to them than we know." He sighed, looking up at the ceiling.

She shook her head slowly, in thought, "If part of his soul is stored in that locket... And based on what you've said, he wouldn't even die of old age. That would make him... Immortal."

Esme felt the colour drain from her face as the realisation set in that they weren't just opposing a powerful wizard - he was more like a demon.

She continued, "How-how do we destroy it? It must be possible to destroy it. Oh! Can he tell we've stolen it?"

"I don't think so..." Regulus thought, "Because otherwise there wouldn't be the need to hide in it such an inaccessible location. I don't know for sure though. We can't do anything until we know more." He closed his eyes, trying to push the thought of the cave as far away from his mind as possible as he focused on the feeling of Esme's fingers running through his hair.

Esme let out a sarcastic chuckle, "Well then what was the bloody point in leaving a letter? You're meant to be clever, you idiot."

He pursed his lips before admitting, his voice barely above a whisper, "Perhaps I shouldn't have signed my initials at the bottom."

"Oh dear Merlin..." She shook her head, "There's no more pretending we're Death Eaters anymore, is there? We can't keep playing nice with them whilst taking the chance that at any moment the Dark Lord could potentially uncover what we've done."

"But don't you see? He can't be defeated until the horcrux is destroyed."

Esme blinked, "I suppose. He would never allow himself to be arrested, after all, so he must be killed. How do we destroy it? Surely once it's destroyed he would be vulnerable again. If it's advanced dark magic, I doubt any charms we know will work on it."

"I don't know." Regulus confessed.

Esme frowned at this, "Well we need to get answers then, don't we?"

"I have an idea."

"What?"

Swallowing the lump in his throat, Regulus looked up at the ceiling and explained, "I think we need to pay a visit to Borgin and Burkes."

-

a/n

okay, so i'm not going to lie i did quite nearly not save regulus from the cave

but reg and esme had fallen out and it was genuinely too upsetting to write those chapters

i've gotten far too attached to my characters so i'm sticking with my original plot plan for this story, which means there's a lot more to go

and i'm hoping, if i keep updating fast enough, to have this book finished by the end of september, which is when i move