Chapter twenty-one

After I helped Robbie get the make-up off we made our way over to their house for lunch, Phoebe was sitting at the table with the house phone cradled between her ear and shoulder.

"Yes, I'll tell her... Okay, I understand... See you then, bye." All of us were now seated around the dining table and watching her as she stood up, went to the kitchen, came back in with a bunch of letters then realized we were here. "Oh, hey, guys." She smacked her forehead, "I forgot to make lunch!" She jumped up and ran into kitchen, you could hear her running around the kitchen trying to make a fast lunch.

"I'll be right back," I stood up and walked into the kitchen, she was running from the fridge to the oven to the cupboards faster than I thought possible. "Phoebe, what's wrong?" She nearly skidded to a stop when she saw me but then carried on at full speed.

"Nothing's wrong..." I raised my eyebrow at her; I stood next to her and put my hand on top of hers.

She sighed, "I just had a conversation with your father." I didn't raise my head but I nodded for her to continue. "He was talking about staying longer, whether I could look after you but since there's a school trip to London I was asking for his permission to let you go."

"What did he say?" She shook her head. "He said no? So while your boys get to go, I have to stay at home and wallow in self-pity that I have an uncaring father and a bimbo step mom."

She hugged my side, "honey, I'm sorry. I was planning on letting you go but since he said no... There was nothing I could do."

An idea popped into my head; if he wasn't even going to be here then I could go... Right?

"Phoebe... When's he coming back?"

She tapped her finger against her chin, thinking. "I don't think he actually said... Maybe, two, three weeks at the most. The twins like it there so they thought they would treat them to a longer trip."

My fists curled up, my dad was going to treat the twins better than his daughter that stuck by him through tough times?

"I'm going."

"What?" She looked startled by my tone of voice but she tried not to show it.

"I said I'm going. I don't care what he says, he made me go to visit her parents when I wanted to stay here and now I do want to go to the UK he says no? Forget that, I'm going and he can't stop me." I was angry but Phoebe's arm around me made it slowly fade away.

"And I won’t stop you. Dear, I know what your father doing is hard but you've always got me and my boys. We'll always be here for you." She smiled down at me; a tear escaped her eye and ran down her cheek.

"Thank you, Phoebe. I know I've got you guys and you are probably a better family than my father's." Seeing Phoebe cry made me want to cry so I took a deep breath and steered towards the topic of London. "When are we leaving and who's going?"

"You've leaving on Wednesday and it's you, the twins, Robbie. When I read the letter it had the names of people going, it's like a small congratulations for doing well in school - academic or sports."

I grinned; this was going to be a good trip. "How long is it for?"

"I think I read a week. Or maybe a week and a half. I can't remember, your letter got delivered here and since I knew what it was, I was going to tell you all when we were having lunch," she smiled then pointed towards the door. "Now, scoot, I need to make lunch for hungry boys." I laugh and shook my head, how I loved Phoebe.

~

After we all ate lunch, Phoebe told us lot about the trip to London. There were a few other schools in the area going as well, I read down the list and saw Zac's school, I smiled but then it faltered. Was I in a relationship with Tony? I liked Zac as well...

"Are you okay?" James whispered into my ear while Tony and his mum were talking.

I shook my head, "James what am I going to do?"

"About what, sweetie?" I leant against him.

"I'll tell you later, we haven't hung out in years." He smiled and nodded.

We spent the rest of the afternoon in the Johnsons living room, the boys making jokes while Phoebe scolded them but you could see the amusement in her eyes. I was sitting in the corner, watching everything, I was starting to realize that, maybe, the Johnsons are more of a family to me than I ever thought. James sat down next to me on the arm of the one seater. "Are you alright?"

"Didn't you ask me that already?" I smiled at him; he put his arm around me.

"Budge, sit on my lap," I raised my eyebrow put stood up. He slid into my seat and pulled me back down, "now, tell me what's wrong."

"I'm confused... Not the best way to start, is it?" He smiled and shrugged.

"Begin however you want, Mitchie-bear." I smiled, Mitchie-bear. He hadn't called me that since I was a little girl.

I sighed and decided to say it, "I don't know if I'm dating your brother or what to do about Zac..." My head had dropped down, I felt bad, I felt like I was playing two boys.

James lifted my chin up; I looked into his eyes as he smiled. "Mitchie, sweetie, don't worry. See how things play out. If you want to date... Tony, date him. If you want to date Zac, then date him. No one will think anything different of you, but it's up to you, just - just don't hurt them."

I stared at him, I never noticed that he had amazing eyes before and he was a good friend. "James..."

He squinted his eyes. "Let’s go for a walk, yeah?" I nodded my head and stood up, the other brothers were watching us but I didn't care. James took my hand and pulled me outside. We walked along the road, hand in hand.

"I can't wait to show you around London, it's amazing. You'll love the clothes shops," I flashed him a smile; I was telling him in advance that he would be shopping with me.

"I can't wait, it should be fun. I read Zac's school is coming, so is Tess and Nora. Our little gang in London, I can honestly say that this should be good." Even though his voice was happy there wasn't a smile on his face.

I stopped and made him look at me, "what's wrong, Jamie?"

"Jamie," he narrowed his eyes. "Nothing, there isn't anything wrong."

"There's something wrong. Tell me, I want to know."

"I can- I can't say, sorry." He was looking the other way now. I took hold of his cheek and guided his face to look at mine.

"James, you know that were best friends, we're meant to tell each other everything."

"Exactly, we're best friends." He muttered under his breath, then louder he said: "Mitchie, I can't say - do, whatever."

"James, tell me right this second - show me whatever, I'm confused?" He was honestly confusing me, what was up with him? What couldn't he tell - show - me?

"Don't hate me," he whispered.

"I could never hate you, you know that." As soon as I said it, James lips were on mine. I was too shocked to move but then I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him back. After a few minutes he pulled away, looked at me before running towards his house. I sighed, what had I done now? I sat against a wall and put my head in my hands, why did I kiss him back? Now what do I do? My life was screwed...