I walked toward my car quickly as Pharaoh called my name. Just as I reached it he reached out an grabbed my arm. I sighed before turning to face him. He looked a mixed of irritated and stressed out. I sighed before giving him a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"Sorry I'm just really trying to get home"

"Why you been dodging me ma? It's been two days and you barely responding to my text"

"I just need some time to myself to think Rao. I promise"

"Is it Heiress and what happen? Essence I'm sorry for snapping on you---"

"It's not that. I just.... seeing your sister like that fucked me up and--- I just need some time to sort out my thoughts. I love you and I'm not mad. I just need to figure some things out"

"Why can't you just tell me?" he sighed in frustration "We can just talk about---"

"Pharaoh it's not that simple"

"Clearly it isn't if it's a secret from me" he let the sarcasm seep "What happen to telling each other everything and no secrets"

"Don't do that! This has nothing to do with us!" I got louder getting irritated "You're being real selfish right now"

"Selfish?! Because I'm worried about your ass I'm selfish?!"

"Rao---"

"Nahh" he backed away from me "Bet! I'm selfish right? I won't worry about your ass no more!"

"Pharaoh---"

"Hit me when I'm not being too selfish for you" he turned to walk away

"Pharaoh! Pharaoh stop! Pharaoh"

He ignored me as he continued to walk back on campus. He had two more classes and I refused to chase after him. I shook my head before getting in my car and going home to meet with Heiress. She had been feeling depressed and scared so she came over as soon as I was out of class to talk things out until she felt better. I wasn't pushing her to the side for her brother. He'd just have to get out his feelings.

I shook my head remembering my last conversation with Pharaoh. He successfully ignored me for a week. By Sunday, I had sent him an apology and tried to call but he ignored me. Heiress saw him at their house a couple times and said he seemed upset still. I tried to give him space but I missed him. I talked to my dad about it and he helped me see the importance of Pharaoh knowing everything about my past situation.

To be honest, I knew he wasn't mad about what happen. I was the scapegoat for his anger about not being able to protect his sister. I had been to enough groups and therapy sessions to see the signs of a family member coping. Heiress shut down and would only talk to me, which I know hurt him because of house close he was to his siblings. She trusted me though and I couldn't apologize for that.

I had to journal and pray about it but it all came down to me needing to tell him all my skeletons. Since I spent the night with Kira, she agreed to dropped me off at his place. I waved bye before knocking on the door. A half sleep divine open the door before walking away, back to his room. I shook my head before walking into Pharaohs room.

"Rao I'm getting dressed just hold on"

I froze hearing a female voice from his bathroom.

"Mmhmm" I hummed loudly

"That chik-fil-a line must've been hella long" she laughed "Told you I was fine with Mickey Ds!"

"Hmmm" I responded

"Don't do that Kai would've been fine! His stubborn butt laying on my bladder anyway"

My eyes bucked realizing it was Harmony. A piece of me knew but I was praying anyone else was in there.

"And thanks for last night" she made a satisfied sigh "I know I sprung it on you out of nowhere but it's the hormones. I really do wish I could wake up near you all the time... but I get this can't happen. I mean ole girl will never know anyway. Not like it's a big deal. I am yo baby mama" she laughed

I shuffled grabbing my things and heading back out his room, slamming the door behind me. My vision was blurred by the tears I refused to let fall and the red my rage was brewing.

"Ess you good?" Divine came from the back "Slamming do—"

"Can you please take me home?" I wiped the one tear that escaped "Please"

"Y-yeah. Let me umm let me grab my hoodie"

"I'll be outside" I sniffles

Just as I turned around the door open and Pharaoh walked in, sure enough with her food. I scoffed shaking my head causing his head to snap up. He looked surprised to see me and just stood there. I rolled my eyes before pushing pass him to get outside. He grabbed my arm instantly but I pushed him away.

"Leave me alone!"

"Baby wh—"

Divine came outside getting between us. He spoke to Pharaoh who wouldn't take his eyes off me before he pulled me to his car. As soon as he drove all I growled in frustration.

"Want to talk about it?"

"Why dude gotta be so fucked up?" I looked at him "Like what did we do for y'all to just not give a fuck?"

"You know that's not true" he shook his head "Pharaoh in fucking love with you girl"

"So being laid up with his baby mother is loving the fuck out of me?!"

"Whooooaaaaa"

"I can't believe his ass"

"Essence I was pretty fucked up last night but I know for sure Rao wouldn't risk y'all relationship by cheating!"

"You know how bad I wanna believe that?! But even if they didn't why the fuck would you lay up with her?! He that mad that I needed to deal with my own bullshit?!"

"I get what you saying but you gotta just talk to him about it"

"Fuck him!" I felt the tears rolling "Every time something happens I gotta go talk to him like I fucked up! He got a whole bitch in his room! Spending the fucking night! Fuck him!"

"Ess calm down—"

"Why am I even talking to you?" I shook my head "All of y'all just alike"

"Damn I'm just trying to be a friend"

"To who?!" I took a deep breath shaking my head "I'm sorry D I appreciate you for taking me home... but you just like them"

"What I do?" He chuckled

"Look at what you do to Yoni"

His smiles dropped and he became silent.

"That girl loves you with every fiber of her being. She put up with all yo bullshit and hoeing because she sees the great guy inside that you hide from everyone else. But do you give a fuck? No! You'd rather fuck any chick that'll open her legs than be down for her like she down for you"

"Yoni know what it is between us. I've never been the relationship type to look for anything"

"But you've let feelings grow between y'all for two years! Yoni is an amazing woman! As fucked up as she can be at times... she don't deserve that shit"

"Don't you think I know that?!"

"Then why string her along? Why hurt the good woman that really love y'all?!"

"It's never intentionally Ess. That's why I know Pharaoh ain't do no foul shit to you. I got mad love for Yoni..." he pulled up to my condo and parked "but I can't be the man she need. I try to let her go but we always end up back to what we been doing"

"She should be worth you changing D... if you can't leave her alone, try being the man she deserves. Hell try being the man you deserve to be"

I got out the car shaking my head before heading inside. I decided to send Pharaoh a text before going in the house and straight to my bed. I didn't want tot be bothered with anyone. It finally felt like Pharaoh was just too good to be true. He continued to text me over and over again, but it only led to me crying until I fell asleep.

My leg bounced as I sat there waiting on Harmony to come out my room. She finally came out looking at me confused.

"What's wrong? You were fine just a second ago"

"What?" I stood up "Whatever. What did you say to Essence?"

"Ess—Nothing! Why do you think I said something to you girlfriend?"

"She was just here and left mad at me! What happen Harm?"

"Damn" she shook her head "I was in the bathroom and thought it was you. But all I said was wait because I was getting dressed and thanks for the food"

"Fuck!" I yelled

"I'm so—"

"Nah you good Harmony" I sat down "It's a misunderstands but I don't need this shit right now"

"Don't stress it boo. I promise I'll even tell her nothing happen. It was just one night"

"Harmony it's not that simple. You know that. Yeah you my baby mother but she's my girlfriend. All she know is you were in my room changing early in the morning"

"If she that insecure to jump to conclusions, y'all got bigger problems Rao" she shrugged "But I'm gone go. Yoni should b—"

There was a knock at the door interrupting her. Sure enough it was Essence linesister Yoni. I hugged her before hugging Harmony and letting them leave. Before I could closed the door Divine was pulling up. I know he had to talk to her so I waited on him to speak to Yoni before my questions came.

He sighed walking into the house and sitting on the couch. I followed and looked at him waiting.

"D—"

"You stupid you know that right" he shook his head "Why would you leave yo side piece at the house?! And not tell nobody!"

"It ain't like that man" I rubbed my temple trying to calm down "Destiny went somewhere with her dude and Harmony was alone. She called and ask me to bring her food. I got there and she said she didn't want to be alone. I didn't want to stay over there so I brought her here. Y'all would be my witness that I was asleep on the couch!"

"I mean that was pretty smart"

"I swear nothing happen! I don't even get why she mad at me"

"Honestly baby girl went off on me and you" he shook his head "She seemed more upset that you let her sleepover. I don't think she believe y'all fucked or nothing but she's livid about her being here. Plus she said she always come to talk to you when things go wrong. Then she went off about me not treating Yoni right. Shit just went left. Long story short, give shorty a day or two of just texting to check in if she okay. But Sunday, pull up on her and explain yourself"

"That's too long"

"No it's not. She need today and tomorrow they got sorority shit to handle so she not gone be at home. Yoni already told me they gone be doing community services, they chapter meeting after, then they line meeting up for shit" he stood up "I'm not saying don't talk to her but send her 'I love you' messages and check in text. Just don't try to talk it out until you pull up on her Sunday"

"Bet" I sighed

"It's okay fam" he shrugged "She got me thinking too but that's another story. Yo girl ain't leaving you bruh. Just chill"

I nodded as he walked away. I figured I'd go spend time with my fam and sister since Essence was mad. A piece of me was hoping she'd be there with Heiress but I was wrong. She was really hurt and I had to respect her space. It just wasn't gone be for long.