**********One Month Later**********

A month of a whole new world. I didn't realize how unhappy I was until I began to feel happiness again. Every morning I woke up talking to my mom, and I knew she was smiling down on me with how things changed. I was visiting my dad every other weekend, the girls got there second visit too, talking to Mazi or Auntie almost every day, finishing out the semester with Dean's list, and spending just about all my free time with Pharaoh.

Pharaoh was everything I didn't know I needed. My love for him grew every day. Now, I'm not crazy in love or anything like that... but I could definitely see us being in a relationship. I was slowly but surely falling for him. He was always taking me out or just kicking it at the house with me. We even hung out on campus together, which was mostly at the library. And let me not forget, the Sunday dinners with his family and the girls. It was like we couldn't stay away from each other too long before one of us was calling.

I still wasn't ready to be more than friends... or whatever we had become. And sure enough all the happiness was coming to a end since Christmas was coming in a few days. I didn't tell anyone that my nightmares were back. I was trying not to but I was pushing myself away from Pharaoh and not talking to my family. I was trying so hard to stay happy but I couldn't.

I started avoiding Pharaoh on Wednesday but I've been avoiding everyone since yesterday. I woke up from the worst dream I ever had about the incident. I couldn't sleep and I was losing it. Mazi and Auntie Harper got here this morning but I left as soon as they got there. I keep texting everyone so they know I'm okay but I just can't be around people.

The community center I volunteer at was closed but I had a key since they gave me an office. I pulled up and sat in my car trying to decide if I was even going to go inside. I had been riding around for hours so I could just keep driving. As I kept contemplating there was a knock at my window. I look to see Gianni dressed like an eskimo.

I laughed as I turn my car off and grabbed my Walgreens bag of snacks before heading inside with her behind me. I fixed the alarm and text the director so she knew I was here then headed to my office. Gianni stayed quiet while I turned on music and open up us some snacks, but as soon as I sat down she was staring at me upside my head.

"What?" I chuckled

"Bitch don't what me! First you been on some sneaky shit now you MIA on everybody. You auntie calling me trying to figure out what's wrong and I realized I haven't physically seen yo ass in two weeks"

"Gia---"

"Don't Gianni me heifer! Explain! Now!"

"Fine" I sighed "I just been spending a lot of time with Pharaoh and---"

"Lie again!" she threw a skittle at my head

"Ouch trick!"

"I talk to Pharaoh when your auntie first called me! That's a conversation that needs to happen to but he hasn't talk to you since Wednesday and you keep sending him you busy and one word responses"

I sighed out of frustration that these niggas really had a whole meeting about my ass. I shook my head and looked at the ceiling letting out a laugh. I did love my peoples but sometimes they just were too concerned. I finally looked at Gianni who had moved to her popcorn but was still waiting for my explanation.

"Okay, okay, okay" I sighed "I really have been spending time with Pharaoh, but lately.... I just wanted to be by myself"

"What's wrong?"

"My nightmares came back" I shook my head "You know one of the therapist I had said I just needed to make happy memories.... but I've tried. My mom tried for years. She always made Christmas special.... but nothing ever stopped them from coming. I don't like having to talk about it with other people. And these have been worst"

"How?"

"Most of the time my nightmares are just memories.... but since Sunday it starts as a memory then I'm in my room here and he's there--- I just can't deal with it. Pharaoh and me been stuck together like glue, but he spent the night Wednesday and I started fighting him in my sleep"

"Damn"

"Yup" I shook my head "Told him I had a nightmare about clowns from a movie the twins watched before he got there" we both laughed "I just don't want to have to explain to him the nightmares.... I don't want to keep dealing with it"

"When do they usually go away"

"Sometimes they're gone by the day after Christmas... sometimes I have nightmares until almost February" I shrugged "I never know until I go to sleep"

"Don't shut us out girl" Gianni pouted "I can't say I understand, but I know when shit gets hard for you that's what you do. You don't gotta do that no more. You got support and people that love and care about you"

"I guess"

"I'm serious! Especially Pharaoh! He so fucking worri--- BITCH! What is up with that?" she got excited "I need to know everything!"

I laughed at her excitement and smiled thinking about Pharaoh. I shrugged my shoulder before opening my phone and going to my photos. I handed her my phone to see the shit ton of pictures of me with Pharaoh over the last month.

"Oh shit!" her mouth dropped as she scrolled

"After I went to visit my dad, he asked me to come over and braid his hair. He was being weird as fuck and like went off on me out of no where. So I'm like yo what's yo problem? And he basically said he really had feelings for me. So I took your advice and told him that I liked him"

"BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITCH!" she squealed "I can't believe you and Rao got together!"

"We're not together" I laughed "We're best friends and we kicking it. We've gone one dates and stuff but nothing more than that. I'm not ready for anything that serious. Pharaoh's okay with that"

"Are you? I mean Pharaoh has hoes fanning over him all the time"

"I'm fine. I'm pretty sure he's still fucking a jump off or two but that's not what I'm on"

"What about when you're ready to be with him?"

"I guess I'll cross that bridge when I get to it"

"Look, I'm not going to let you shut us out. Come on" she started grabbing the snacks "We going back to your house and you're going to talk to your family then you're going to call your man"

"He's not my man" I laughed standing up "And fine but I don't know what to say to Pharaoh"

"You don't have to tell him everything but you need to talk to him too"

"I guess"

We packed up my snacks and headed back to my house. I knew Mazikin and Aunti Harper were going to feel bad about me having the nightmares. My family was full of fixers and when they can't fix the problem they take it personally. Still, they were the least of my worries because I still had to deal with Pharaoh and Christmas.

I laid on my bed zoned out thinking about Essences. I knew something was up but things were super weird and I couldn't understand why. I mean clearly something was bothering her but I couldn't put my finger on what. My thoughts were interrupted by a knock on my door which followed by Jordan walking in.

"Gigi told me to tell you Ess back at home and gone call you tonight"

"Bet" I sighed sitting up "Did she say what was wrong?"

"Nah but she seemed cool so whatever it is must be over now"

I nodded thinking about what it could've been.

"Ayo" he sat in my desk chair "I been meaning to talk to you"

"About what?"

"Essence" he sighed "Dude you putting a lot of work into this thing... I don't want her to get hurt because of a fucking game. Ess cool people and she's my girl best friend. I know you and the guys don't mean no harm but.... I don't know it's fucked up man" he shook his head "She don't deserve to be played with like that"

"I know" I smiled thinking about her

"You know?"

"Yeah" I sighed looking at him "I don't even give a fuck about the bet anymore. I really do like her man. Essence is everything I could ask for and more. She's... perfect"

"You serious right now?" he looked shocked

"Yeah man" I laughed "I don't know. Every since we got cool we've been getting closer and I aint fucking with the game or the bet or none of that"

"Damn Rao. You really like her"

"Honestly I tried not to... I just can't help it. I aint never met a chick like her"

"Whatever the highest form of shocked is, that's where I'm at right now"

"Shut up"

We laughed

"I'm serious Pharaoh. I mean we've known each other since high school. You always been a player. I never expected you to fall for a chick. Especially Essence. She's not really yo type"

"To be fair, I love women in general. I just prefer slim thick light skin chicks" I laughed "But E? Baby girl is like a whole new world for me and I'm drowning in it. Shit I love that girl man"

"WHAT?" he jumped up

I laughed falling back on my bed rolling around. Jordan looked like he saw a ghost and was going to shit bricks.

"Calm down boy!" I caught my breath "I aint Jay and Bee in love over here like yo in love ass. I just got mad love for Essence"

"So what about the bet?"

"Fuck it" I shrugged "We not on that type of time anyway. I was gone lose from jump and I aint pressed about it. Plus I am a-okay with this being my last round"

"Finally" he shook up with me "I'm trying to tell yall them little boy games aint where it's at"

"True shit" I sighed "I just wish I knew what was bugging her?"

"I don't know" he shrugged "Gianni said she thought she was distance with it being her first holidays without her mom but turns out she with yo ass all the time"

I laughed but jumped up once it hit me!

"DUDE! That's gotta be it! She said she don't really fuck with Christmas anyway but it's probably real fucked up since her mom gone"

"Damn"

"Maybe I can cheer her up" I thought out loud

"What you thinking?"

"I don't know" I shrugged "I just know Ion want my girl sad on Christmas"

"Yo girl?"

"Fuck you" we laughed "I'm being serious. She's been happy since we started kicking it and I want it to stay that way"

"Hmmm" he nodded "Just get her a gift or something"

"Ess not bout material shit"

"Well what she like?"

"She like that romantic ass love story shit females read in books. Like she swear life aint a fairytale but I know she be eating that shit up when we be watching movies and shit"

"Do that then" he shrugged

"What?"

"Give baby girl a fairytale nigga"

I cocked my head to the side taking in what he said. As dumb as this nigga can be he has brilliant ideas. I felt the smile forming on my face as thoughts ran through my head. That was exactly what I was going to do. What better Christmas gift than a fairytale Christmas.