"So..."

What am I supposed to say ? Marcus just looks at me with a big smile on his face. After Nate left I hesitated to follow him and missed my chance to flee the library. And now I'm standing in the middle of the room, looking everywhere but at him trying to occupy my hands.

'Awkward.' My wolf laughs.

I can hear the 'tic' of the seconds going by and the time stretching endlessly around us.

Who was it that said time was a human concept that has no meaning in the rest of the universe ?

Well, let me tell you time is insanely slow. Try watching a plant grow, or a drop of water fall, it takes for ages... people live and die yet, things stay the same. They make the same choices, same mistakes, try the same things, think the same way. Again and again. If the world came to an end and started all over again we'd still end up in the same spot.

"Long time no see." I try to joke but my voice is tight and full of unease.

"I'm happy to see you again." Marcus replies kindly.

"How have you been ?"

Are you trying to sound interested ?' My wolf mocks.

Then what am I supposed to do ?

'Run for the hills ?'

Or, I can kill him.

'I'm pretty sure you can't. Like you'll be cursed or something. He's the Guardian after all.'

There'll always be another one.

'I don't think that's how this works.'

So I was right, I need to be nice.

"As you can see I'm getting old."

"That's how life goes, isn't it ?"

His mischievous smile is enough of an answer implying that I am not getting old.

"You might not see it but I've got some wrinkles around my eyes here." I point at my face trying to justify myself somehow and immediately feel stupid for it.

I roll my eyes before continuing. "So, are we going to have a problem ?"

I do everything I can to not sound bitter and menacing.

"What do you mean ?" He asks perplex.

"Are you going to tell them who I am ?"

"This is not my place to say. I am the Guardian of the Library, I am here to give answers to those who seek help. But I can only answer to the questions they ask. With what knowledge the books hold. My opinion doesn't matter."

I feel a little relieved, reassured that my secrets are safe.

'For now.'

"Then can I ask for answers ?"

"Of course. The alpha said you could have access to the library. Is there something in particular ?"

"Are there books about me." I whisper almost fearing the answers myself.

He simply smiles at that but I don't feel offended, his smile is gentle.

"I'd say fifty percent of the books in this place are about you in a way or the other. You started a lot of changes in this world."

In that moment I don't know if I hallucinated or if he just winked at me playfully.

"How about why I was created ? And about the curse." I add to be more precise.

The old man turns back to his desk and opens a gigantic book filled to the rim with tightly-nibbled watery ink, turning its pages carefully and slowly, scanning over the text with an expert eye.

"According to the this," He shows me the markings listing the different books of the Library with precise details, "the ones about your history are in the most ancient section. However I won't be able to help you translate them."

"Could you show them to me ?"

"Of course ! This way please."

He starts walking deeper in the library, in one of the sections I didn't have the time to explore last time, on the third floor and just as he said the atmosphere is more solemn. Even the smell is different. The room suddenly seems quieter, almost with a holy air to it. There are scrolls and really old pieces of paper. I immediately recognize the first languages that existed.

'Damn, haven't seen that in a long time. I don't even remember how to read it correctly.'

I frown because neither do I.

"I don't suppose any of the other books are any kind of dictionaries."

"I'm afraid not."

"Then I think I'll need some time, to try and remember it."

"Of course. You can come here anytime you want."

"Thank you Marcus. For this and for everything else."

"I'd like to say that it is really good to see you again. Back then I was just a pup and I didn't always understand my mother. But she was always telling me about you. I finally understood when I took my vows and came to work here. When I got access to the books. Everything made sense, at least. All the stories and the history of this world were finally crystal clear."

I can't help the blush creeping up my cheeks.

What am I, a teenage girl ?

I don't know what else to do but nod.

"I'm happy to see you grew up so well."

'You sound so old.' My wolf giggles.

"I'll see you around." I finish before leaving the room.

I lazily wobble in the corridors, looking out the window at the weather. The sky is clear and blue, without any clouds contrary to my mind that's more agitated than during a thunderstorm. I don't know what to do or what to think anymore. What am I supposed to do ? Should I leave ? Stay ? Can I really help them translate the books ? What if they start understanding more than they should ? More than what's safe for me ? What if I say something that would implicate me directly. I don't think there are any books with details on the Beast of the Sun because nobody really knew me, like my name, my height or the fact that I'm a woman and not a man. Nobody lived to tell the tale, I made sure of that. My story was a whisper, a threat, a menace. People closed their eyes and prayed that the shadows would go away.

I find Jared outside in the gardens giving orders to two fighters including Gabe. The latter glares my way. His injuries are healed but if he needs a reminder I'll gladly oblige. After finishing Jared trots my way. He seems tired and tense.

"This is going to be such a hassle." He grumbles.

"What is ?"

"The meeting."

"I'm not following." I frown.

"Nat... I mean the alpha decided to organize a summit of the most powerful packs because of the attacks. Usually we would gather in New York or another neutral city but we need access to the Library so we have to have it here, at the pack house. We can't take the books out of the Library."

Ah...

"I still don't understand."

"Some of the packs are not... friendly."

"What members are coming ?"

"Alphas and betas only."

"How many ?"

"At least twenty."

"When are they coming ?"

"In a week's time."

'We're out of here. You can't let them see you.'

I know.

"Then we have a week." I announce.

After that I'm gone.

"For what ?" He asks unsure.

"To make sure your security is perfect."

"I don't need your help." He grumbles under his breath.

"Why does he want to have a summit now."

"He's trying to form an alliance between the packs. So that we can fight the rogues together and get rid of them once and for all I guess." Jared shrugs.

He seems unconvinced by the idea and so am I. Even though packs are on friendlier terms than in the past, they still don't like each other. Simply because every alpha is egoistical and wants to be stronger than the others. It's not really their fault, it's in their blood, another one of the twisted ideas of the moon. However this means that no one will want to listen to orders from someone else and in that case an alliance is impossible. They can't follow one leader. Or they'll all want to lead.

I sense a headache ahead.

"This is definitely going to be difficult." I end my interrogatory.

When night falls I go back to my room to make a call discreetly. I have noticed a lot of people tend to listen in on my conversations. I don't know if it's because I'm a guest here -more like the unwanted rogue really- or if they are just bored and curious about everyone.

I find the emergency phone I keep at the bottom of my bag at all times and start dialing a number I know by heart. I have no saved numbers in it, it would be too dangerous if it fell in the wrong hands, especially when I tend to lose things easily. And since my memory is one of my strong points it works just fine.

'She might not be there you know.'

I listen to the ring tones as I wait. My wolf is right, she could be on a trip or something. Wait what time is it in France right now ? Is it the middle of the night ? The afternoon ?

I should have paid more attention when they explained the time differences to me.

"Hello." A strong and clear voice answers.

"Leila, it's me." I inform her.

'As if that's obvious.' My wolf sighs at my logic.

"Right, sorry. It's Hope."

I hear her crystalline laugh.

"I know it's you Hope. I could recognize your voice in my sleep."

"Why ? Because of its nasal quality ?" I joke.

"Your voice is fine."

"How have you been ?" I inquire promptly.

"You know me, taking every day as it comes. Lazily."

"You learnt from the best !" I laugh.

"You know, it's been a while since I saw you. You should come back. France has really changed lately." She informs me.

I met Leila in Texas at the end of the 19th century. She lived in Austin and worked as a pharmacist. She was -and still is- a smart strong were-coyote. She was the exact opposite of me, wanting to help others as much as she could. She took the job as a pharmacist to have access to drugs to help the poor. She also had a medical degree which allowed her to tend to patients. She didn't have a pack back then and we decided to travel together for a while. It felt good to have someone, especially at the time, I was in a dark phase because Liam had just started his new life and I felt alone.

With time she became my most trusted friend. My only friend really. She never judged me and since she wasn't a werewolf she didn't have the usual animosity and fear which roots were deeply engraved in others. I considered her my equal. Were-coyotes are smaller than werewolves and their fur isn't as much an indication of strength as for wolves. They are not as strong but they often are faster.

We spent a decade traveling around the American continent before going back to Europe when Liam died. After that she stayed in France. When I asked her why she stopped moving from place to place she said she fell in love with the country. And with World War One and Two she had a lot of work to do and many patients to nurse.

Now she resides in a villa I own in the south of France and takes care of the place. It's as much hers as it is mine. She works as a doctor in the small village where the villa is.

"So how are you ?" She asks.

"I'm... we'll say I'm fine. Actually that's why I called."

"I'm listening."

I can hear the seriousness in her tone.

"It's a long story, but to make it short I have to stay with a pack for a while and they are being attacked by rogues. It seems quite serious to be honest. I'd like you to come and bring the contracts with you. The ones in the chest in my room. Wait, they might be in the attic."

"I don't know what shocks me most. But I think I'll go with you in a pack." She pretends to be surprised and feigns a gasp.

"Trust me, I don't know why either."

"Mm, that sounds fishy." She tells me suspiciously.

'Tell her about your mate !'

He's not.

'And I'm not the queen of England.'

You're not.

'Anymore. I'm not anymore.'

Let it go already ! It's in the past.

"I've heard of the attacks, it seems European packs are also being targeted." Leila brings me back to the conversation.

I'll think of the dresses and crowns made of Diamonds carefully stored another time.

"There are attacks everywhere apparently."

"I was going to contact you soon anyway. People are trying to reach you, they are sending letters and calling the house.

"About what ?"

"I don't know I didn't open them, and the ones who call ask for you. They are not talkative much. Is that your new number ? I'l bring your mail too."

"Alright. Thanks."

"So. Where should I be heading to ?"

"I'll send you the details."

"When do you need me ?"

"As soon as you can."

"I'll need a few days to organize everything. I have to find someone to replace at work."

"Sure. Thank you." I think for a second. "Could you bring my dragon teeth and some of the fairy dust ?"

"I don't think they'll let me board the plane with this. Why ?"

"You're right."

"Did you need it for something ? Maybe I can"

"No, no, it's fine. I just wanted to prove a point." I mumble.

"I can't wait to meet these people !" She exclaims enthusiastically suddenly.

"Why would you say that ?" I frown.

"You're staying with them willingly and you are even helping them and having conversations."

"I'm not that introverted."

"They are changing you." She concludes in a whisper.

You have no idea.

I still can't believe I stayed. And as Leila says I'm helping them. I even got attached to some of them. Jordan and Sydney for example. And I guess Jared is okay.

Then there's Nate. I don't know what to think about him.

"Hope, I have to go. I'll see you soon."

"You too. Be careful."

I go to bed early and wake up starving in the middle of the night and end up in the kitchen like almost every night since I came here.

"What are you doing here ?" Nate asks as I concentrate on the cereals I poured in a bowl.

I wanted something sweet this time, yesterday I had beefsteak at two in the morning. I guess it depends on my mood.

I look at him. His hair and clothes are disheveled and he has dark shadows under his eyes. He hasn't gone to sleep yet.

"I could ask you the same question."

He doesn't answer and comes sit next to me, grabbing a spoon and plunging it directly in my bowl.

Wow Wow WOW ! Who said he could take my food ?!

I shake the cereal box in front of him with knitted brows. I hope the message is clear : GET. YOUR. OWN.

He just rolls his eyes, grabs the box from my hands, grazing my fingers in the process making me shiver from the small contact -I swear he did it on purpose seeing as his eyes shine suddenly and quickly- and pours more food in the bowl. Then he starts eating again.

I don't know what to do. Scream, slap him, spill the cereals over his head or just look at him.

It's too early to scream.

I don't want to slap his gorgeous face right now.

Wasting food is bad.

Then looking it is.

As tired as he seems I find him hot with his three-day stubble and unruly hair. I really want to run my fingers through them. Even in this state he is a strong alpha.

I start eating again too and a comfortable silence fall over us.

"Did you and Marcus find anything else ?" He inquires after a while.

"Not really. Because of the tattoo on their wrist I think they belong to this group." After he left I didn't read anything else so I don't have answers for him. "But it's more of a sect than anything now. I mean in the past they fought because of their beliefs. You heard the rogue, now they don't even know why they fight. I think the rogues are lead by hate, they wish to get even with the packs that abandoned them. It's petty."

I thought my followers went extinct centuries ago when I got bored of playing war and stopped it altogether. When the Sun created me he wanted to rule over everything, get back his influence. I fought for him and the wolves fought for the Moon. I found wolves and other creatures to rally to the cause. They wanted things to change, they didn't want to listen to the strong wolf packs anymore. And I guess rogues were easily swayed because it meant they had found a new purpose.

But when peace came back, when I disappeared they should have too. Or at least they should have disappeared with time. Everything comes to an end with time.

"Maybe their colonel wants to start a war again." He offers.

No I don't.

"I don't think they are following his orders anymore." I reply.

"You're right. He's dead by now."

"That makes them more dangerous. If they blindly follow orders without a reason it means we can't reason with them."

I have made a lot of enemies along the years. But they aren't targeting me, they are coming after the packs. That's why I find it so weird that they'd associate themselves to the Beast of the Sun.

'They probably don't know what it means anymore.'

You're right. Thats a strong possibility.

I also think Nate is right. This has something to do with the Library. Otherwise they would take their time and find a new strategy of attack. Something changed and now they are in a hurry.

The question is : whos leading them ?