I stood there while they lowered his casket into the ground. Tears spilled from my eyes. I felt a pair of arms wrap around me and I turned in towards them and buried my face in their shoulder. I turned back around and noticed the grave diggers were almost done. After they were done people started migrating away. Several came over and kissed my cheek or hugged me and gave me their condolences. I kindly thanked them but rarely heard a word out of their mouth. Once everyone had left I was finally left alone. I stood there over my husbands freshly dug grave. Chelsea,refusing to leave my side, stood there with me also. "Do you want to go home?" I heard her ask quietly after a while. I shook my head tears filling my eyes again. "No.." I answered. She gave a slight nod and continued to stand there with me. After standing there for what felt like hours I finally decided it was time to go. I turned and Chelsea did too wrapping her arm around me and lead me to her car. We rode to my house in silence. Thankfully nobody was there. We walked in and I went straight up to our room and fell down in the bed where I cried myself to sleep.

I woke up the next morning in the same dress I had on yesterday. I decided to shower. I took a quick shower and threw on some sweat pants and a t-shirt and just let my hair go. I made my way down stairs to find Chelsea up and making coffee. "You're here early." I said. She shook her head. "I never left." "You didn't have to stay. You should've went home to Luke and Cason." I said grabbing the cup of coffee she placed on the counter in front of me. "You needed me. I'll always be here for you Jay. Luke may be my husband and the love of my life but you're my soul mate and I'll be here every time you need me." She said. I smiled at her. "Thank you." She just nodded and took a drink of her coffee. "You had a call." She said suddenly. I shrugged. "I figured I'd get several. That's what happens when your husband dies from cancer."

She shook her head. "He left a voicemail for you." She said pointing to my cellphone that was laying on the counter. I sighed and picked up my phone and grabbed my coffee cup before pressing play and putting the phone up to my ear. "Hey Jay." I dropped my coffee cup hearing his voice on my phone. I missed everything he said so I had to replay the message. "Hey Jay. I heard about Will and I wanted to express my deepest sympathy. I'm so sorry for your loss. It's been a long time since we've spoken. I'd love to hear from you and catch up. I love you." The message ended. By now Chelsea was in cleaning up my mess. "He wants to see me." I said quietly. Chelsea picked up the now wet paper towel and threw it away. "Wow. I haven't talked to him since him and Lex divorced." She said. I nodded. "Should I call him back?" I asked. She shrugged. "That's your decision." I took a deep breath before dialing his number. He answered on the second ring. "Jayla?" "Ben." I breathed. "How are you doing?...I'm sorry that was a stupid question. Your husband just died." "I'm making it." I answered still unable to catch my breath. "It's been a while since we've talked." He went on. "Yeah it has." "Too long. I miss you." Just like that my breath was gone again. "I miss you too." "I know you're probably not up for visitors but I'd like to see you when you are." "Okay." I managed to say. "Well I just wanted to know how you were doing. And check up on you. I'll let you go. I hope to hear from you soon. I love you." Unable to answer I just hung up the phone. "He wants to see me." Was all I said when I hung up the phone. "What are you gonna do?" Chelsea asked. I shrugged. "How can I say no Chels? He took my breath away and we were just talking on the phone. I don't think I could stay away from him if I wanted to.." I said. She agreed.

I woke from my sleep with a jump. I remember those beautiful brown eyes. I dreamed about them all night. I rolled over and saw Chelsea standing in my doorway. She came in and laid down in the bed beside me. We lay in silence for a while before she eventually breaks it. "How did you sleep?" She asked. I stared up at the ceiling. "I dreamt of those familiar brown eyes accompanied with jet black hair." I whispered. "I'm such a whore." I scoffed. Chels turned over so she was propped up on her elbow facing me. "You're not a whore." I just shook my head. "What kind of woman dreams about another man two days after her husband dies?" I said. "One who was I love with two different men at the same time." She said simply. I groaned and rolled over and buried my face in my pillow.