feat. bombarded nishikage (poor thing)

you slowed on your pace, staring up at the cloudy gray sky. you looked down and stuffed your hands into the warm pockets of your coat: “today was supposed to be a fun shopping day, why does it feel like it's gonna be so gloomy..?”

you stopped in front of the mall and looked down, shaking your head. ‘i don't feel like doing anything at all...’

you began walking wherever your feet brought you. you looked so dazed (and is actually dazed), nothing comes to your mind and nothing seems to snap you out of it, even when you kept bumping into people's shoulders.

it really was a gloomy day, just like you thought.

—

it was already raining heavily when you suddenly snapped out of your dazed state. you didn't know where you were, so you began to start walking again, trusting your feet to bring you somewhere familiar.

and you ended up settling in a park. the rain was pouring heavily, so the park was deserted (which actually made you feel better).

as if your leg muscles had stopped functioning, you suddenly dropped to the ground beside the swings. if you were in the right state of mind, you would have been vomiting now for sitting on the muddy ground but your mind was blank.

and that somewhat made you feel scared.

you curled yourself, hugging your knees closer to you and laying your head on top of it. trembling, you could only listen to the calming sound of the rain. it made blocked the silence, and it also masked the tears that began falling from your eyes (which you only noticed now).

“wha– why am i–” your voice made a crack, which made you cry harder (this happens to me a lot ;-;). “aah, stop crying..!” you wiped your tears and began to sob, “what the hell is wrong with me, suddenly crying like a child...” it took you a moment to realize that you were just suddenly overcame with sadness. you didn't know where it came from, but you suddenly felt like crying.

‘i haven't cried this hard for years, have i...’ and then you thought, maybe today was the day the dam in you broke; resulting to a breakdown from all the hurt and frustrations you've been keeping to yourself for the past few years.

the insecurities and anxieties of being the manager who's supposed to comfort the boys and take care of them, the frustrations of being imperfect, the past that's been haunting you once again for the past few years, the fear of your loved ones being taken away from you– it all came crashing down on you at once.

blinking away the tears, you began to cry hard; so hard that it actually began to suffocate you. you took deep breaths and fished your phone out of your pants with trembling hands.

shaking, you dialed the number of the first person that came into mind through the tears and the rain on your phone screen. you brought your (really really wet) phone to your ears, hoping and hoping that he would pick up.

“hello?”

hearing his voice, your chest that was previously so tight that it became hard for you to breathe began to feel light.

“manager?” you stayed silent, only listening to his smooth voice. “y/n? are you there?” you nodded, even though you knew he couldn't see you. “y/n, are you okay?” you paused, suddenly feeling tears well up in your eyes, ‘f*ck you, i wouldn't call you while crying if i was.’

shakily taking an inhale, you swallowed. “... yuuma,” you whispered, voice cracking. “... please pick me up, it's so cold and no one's around here. please,” you shut your eyes and covered your mouth to muffle your sobs.

“where are you?” his worried and alerted voice reached your ears. “.. i don't know... i'm in a park and– and–” you tried to catch your breath, clutching your chest tightly. “just hurry and come... i wanna go home. please,,” you whispered and gasped for breath. you dropped your phone and tried your best to breathe while choking on your tears.

“... okay, don't hang up. i'll come to you.” he said as you hugged your knees and dropped your head down, shutting your eyes close and praying for him to come quickly.

“i feel worn out,, i feel tired...” you whispered as you listen to nosaka talk, his voice calming you like magic. you waited and waited, until rain stopped pouring on you.

you suddenly felt a coat draped over you as you raised your head and looked up to see yuuma looking down at you and nishikage (with a worried face) holding an umbrella to cover you from the rain.

“.. you're late...” you whispered with tears in your eyes as nosaka bent down and gathered you in his arms, picking you up. “yes, i am...”

you snuggled in his chest and closed your eyes, ‘so warm...’

nosaka only smiled and carried you inside the car, sitting on the backseat and making you lay your head on his chest, just like a baby.

“let's bring you home.”

—

“oi, oi, why is her clothes soaking wet and why is she unconscious?”

haizaki asked as soon as nosaka arrived at the door with you in his arms, already knocked out. nosaka only pursed his lips and proceeded to bring you to your room.

“oi, what happened?” atsuya turned to nishikage for answers, who only shook his head, “nosaka (san) and i don't know anything.”

nishikage let out a sigh, “manager just suddenly called him and asked to be picked up. when we arrived there, she didn't take shelter from the rain and was curled up on the ground by the swings at a park far away from here. she looked like she was crying a lot when we came, too.”

silence fell upon them as they stared at nosaka's retreating back.

—

nosaka settled you down on your chair and immediately got you a glass of water to drink while preparing a warm bath. “you can't sleep yet, y/n. you have to take a warm bath and get a change of clothes so you won't get sick.” he said as he guided you to your bathroom gently.

“do you need help with taking a bath?” he asked as you shook your head (good thing you were still feeling numb after having a breakdown or else you would've already snapped his neck for even asking), and gently pushed him out of the bathroom.

after soaking yourself in warm water, you got up and got dressed with your nightgown, leaving the bathroom only to see nosaka waiting for you. “aah, you didn't dry your hair at all...” he said as he led you to your vanity table, grabbing your hair dryer and plugging it in.

nosaka began to dry your hair (like the husband material he is) and spoke to you with a soft and gentle tone, “do you feel better?” you looked him in the eyes through the mirror and slowly nodded, “hmn... how did you know where i was..?”

“i don't know, i just did (like always)...”

after drying your hair, he led you to your bed and tucked you in (like a baby). he was about to leave when you grabbed his sleeve. “yuuma,” you called as he turned to you with a smile, “hmm?” you hid half of your flustered face under your duvet, “... thank you for coming...”

nosaka's breath hitched as he sighed and bent to brush your hair away from your face, “you know i'll always come to you.”

— next morning

“... yuuma,” you tugged his shirt and laid your head on his back. “i'm sorry for wetting your clothes and crying on your shoulder yesterday. you even had to tuck me in like a child, i'm so embarrassed.” you said as nosaka chuckled.

“aah, wait, don't try to turn. i don't like it when someone sees my flustered face.” nosaka grabbed your wrist and forcefully turned, as you immediately hid your face in his chest, slapping him on his chest: “hey, you jerk, i told you not to turn.”

“don't worry, i'm glad to be one of the few people who saw you in a vulnerable state.” he said as you glared, clutching his shirt tight. “... are you making fun of me or what.” you sulked as he shook his head and laughed, wrapping his arms around you, “no, i'm not.”

“you're even laughing! i must've looked ugly with my puffy red eyes yesterday, huh?” you said as you threw light punches at his chest as he only smiled, “no you didn't, you look pretty even as you cry.”

‘so, so pretty. just like an angel...’

fun fact:

this was supposed to be

a part of the last chapter,

you were supposed to get emotional

bc of kariya's uhm situation

but then it became too long

and so i decided to just make it

another chapter

huehueheu

anyways,

it's been a month since

i began writing this book and

i hope it's been making you satisfied uwu, love u guys, mwah mwah