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But guess what?

killers

Vote goal:35 votes(I won't update on Wednesday .

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The one emotion that I hate seeing in other's eyes for me is pity. In these 22 years the one thing that I always tried to avoid was the situations which lead me to be pitiful.

There were times when I was quite pitiful but at those situations I kept my head high as if nothing happened. I always composed myself not showing others my weakness. I always tried to smile even when I was falling apart.

But today, today was different, for the first time I didn't mind those glances, I didn't care about anything or anyone except one person. I were never a person to give up that easily and not to forget that I hate waiting.

And these are exact things Abhimanyu asked me for, even though a large part of me wanted to run behind him, but his words and the small part of me knew this was the rightthing to do.

"Beta, have something." Mama said entering the room with Food, I'll never say no to Food, they are morals for life. So I wiped my tears and composed myself, since I hate crying in front of Food. We both had our Food in silence. At the end of day it's all about how you lived.

Later we both settled in the small lounge near the Balcony Garden. The silence was quite deafening.

For the first time I felt that Mama is nervous, even though she was keeping a cool facade her laboured breathing was telling another story. I gave her time.

After star gazing for a couple of minutes and drowning in the newfound solace weaved around us by the blanket of starry sky, the small chirping of crickets and the light breeze.

The not so placid atmosphere was brutally cut off by Mama

"I miss her. After everything that went through her life, it was him that brought her back to life. Di was one of those person who found light in the darkest of times. The only time I didn't find that usual glittering in her eyes was when she was wheeled to the operation theatre one last time. Before she went in she looked at me, that moment I knew she won't come back. That moment she made me promise to look after her Gem and then maybe seeing that promising look in my eyes she smiled that smile, one of those rarest smiles she gives, a smile which can give fluttering hopes of a dreamy life and break a heart at the same time."

Letting a person into our past is not an easy thing that too such an intimate bond between two sisters. It takes a great deal of trust to do that and funny enough today two hard headed people confided in me the darkest part of their life or maybe somewhere a peek to the eternal bond they shared with a lady I didn't know of.

I felt I wanted to know something more, something else. I know I'm being nosy or bitchy but I felt the need to know.

"Abhimanyu's Father?" A part of me immediately regretted that question the moment it left my lips but it was too late.

Silence engulfed us, a part of me felt relived thinking Mama never heard the question until her words sliced through the silence.

"She loved him more than anything and he loved his career more than anything. When she got pregnant he didn't even blink an eye before leaving. Even though Di never accepted the fact but we both knew it was always Ms.Anuradha Prathap's fame, connections, status and money is all that he wanted. But when the real question came to settle down all those didn't weigh up to a lifetime of commitment. After two years we came to know he married a Bigger fish as I like to put it. That was the day when Di completely decided to start living again. I knew until the news of his marriage a big part of her was waiting for him to come back.

Love can make you dumb you know? That's why you have to fall for the right one which ominously doesn't happen that easily. But you learn through it, through the pain and become stronger than yesterday."

The anger, hate, the vengefulness, the coldness and the pain all were shadowing though her voice.

"You know I always thought Abhi will ask this question one day. But he never did, the moment he came back to India as a Powerful man I thought he would finally ask me. But now I know he will never, because in between I forgot the fact that Abhimanyu was not his son but Anuradha's son. He will never ask me. And as for the name. Does it even matter?? I'm sure as hell that man would be regretting leaving my sister and maybe a part wondering how my sister brought up her son. And that name will die with me and that secret being the last connection I have with my sister."

At this point she hugged me and cried and I let her. All those years of pain I let her drain it all out. The darkness engulfing secrets in the silence with a promise to never let it out. We sat there hugging for hours her wails and sorrows dissipating as a fog in the midnight breeze.

"Me and Abhimanyu..." I started only to be cut off my Mama

"Do you really think your Dad didn't tell me anything? Aaru in a relationship to last more than 24 years the first and foremost thing needed is trust to built up trust you should communicate and maintain transparency. And yeah Abhi called me and told me everything which he thinks I need to know. So you don't have to say anything. I know you are tired you should sleep beta. Don't worry we will talk tomorrow. We are leaving in the evening only." She got up after saying this and left after kissing me not before a smile.

Silence....

The deafening silence filling around me making my eyes filling up.

Suddenly everything was about him, the closet, the vanity chair, the bed, the locker.

For godsake I'm not even able to pleat my hair without tearing up!!!

I finally managed to get under the covers engulfing myself in his scent, and felt truly insane, I stood up started throwing the sheets and pillows everywhere.

I was acting like a Madperson. I cried and cried and cried.......

********

I always thought you get hangover only when you have alcohol and that too a lot.

Oh boy! How wrong was I for the last five minutes I'm sitting on this bed not even able to open my eyes, my head is throbbing, but guess what I got life to lead. I can't sit and cry or whine. I got to man up.

I searched the bathroom cabinet and found my lifesaver 'Paracetamol' don't judge me it's throbbing like hell, if Ma comes to know I ate this without a second thought she will kill me.

Wonder why painkillers doesn't sooth the pain in your heart??

Pushing away the depressing thoughts I went to get ready for the day.

The view I saw in the mirror was very horrible. You see that's why I don't use these Makeup sets, it highlights your features and then highlight your dark foggy eyes too.

I cleaned all the mess I've created, trying my maximum to not breakdown yet again, but I failed. So after lot of those traitor tears, and yet again another full blown crying section under the shower, here I'm standing in front of the dining room ready to face the day.

"Come Aaru eat." Mama called me near her. I half expected Jay to be somewhere there. I should have known the last thing to expect from such a big business man is not keeping his words.

I heaved a sigh, did he eat? This is insane, why this much feelings towards him it's been only 2 no 3 weeks maximum. How is this even possible?

"We have to go to the Bank for some legal procedures, you should get ready beta." Dad's voice cut me off from my la la land.

"I already signed the papers Abh-- Abhimanyu gave me." the last thing I want today is doing paperwork.

I hate paperworks.

"It's a huge amount so it's mandatory to be present. You will have to do a biometric assessment too." Dad explained.

I just hummed and continued eating or more like playing with food.

Suddenly my plate was taken away, a part of me remembering a distinct memory of someone taking away my plate. I looked up to see Mama glaring at me and trying to feed me. She urged me to open my mouth.

Realising it's not a good idea to make Mama angry I opened my mouth.

She started feeding, that's when a

oh so jealous Ananya pushed me and tried to get a morsel. Which really made me laugh, but it was a war.

"My Mom..." Ananya whined.

Making Mama facepalm. Then she started feeding both of us.

After filling our tummies we sat there and had our coffee.

"Are you coming with us to Gujarat? We can arrange correspondence class there. We would really love to stay with you but the business, the boutique and Ananya's studies. Will you come with us?.... Wait! You know what I'm staying here, the boutique can be arranged here. " Mama went on rambling.

"Mama stop. It's okay I will be alright you guys should go I'm going to be okay. More or less I too need some space. So it's okay I'll be alright. If there is any problem I promise I will reach out to you guys. Promise."

The reluctance was clear in her face. But she smiled after contemplating for a while.

"We have to go get ready" Dad told.

Writing this chapter was hard. Losing a sister whom you always reached out to suddenly disappeared. A part of you die that day.

Guys life is not always about romantic relationships, so don't forget the relations that made you who you are, embrace those relations.

Because sometimes we think we have time. But that's utter foolishness.

So Aaru is maning up (I'm not sure it's a real word).

If it was worth your time do vote and comment 💖

STAY HEALTHY