THIRTY-ONE |

on to Marco's street my stomach twisted anxiously. Before we left, the driveway had only been occupied by the Porsche we were sitting in. As we drove past now, however, several vehicles were crammed on to the gravel so that there was no room for us to park.

"I think we might be in trouble," Amber said with a faint smile. I couldn't reciprocate it, not with the nerves that coiled in my stomach.

We had to park at the other end of the street, and the walk back to Marco's house was less than pleasant. Amber knew better than to say anything at this point, so instead she reached out and grabbed my hand. I appreciated the gesture, but as we neared the house it did little to calm my nerves.

I wasn't ready for another fight with Arturo when I already had so much to talk to him about. I didn't want another explosion between us. Like Lucas said, we needed to talk, I needed to listen, I needed to find out if I had a reason to be pissed off. But talking would be hard if one of us was already set on a battle.

When we reached the front door Amber released my hand and sent me an encouraging glance, falling into step behind me. I took a deep breath and went inside.

As I walked through the house, it was disconcertingly empty and quiet until I reached the kitchen, which was a whirlwind of activity. Arturo was pacing furiously up and down the small room while two of his men who I didn't recognise typed away on laptops, their expressions intensely concentrated.

I tried to be quiet when I approached, but the second I set foot in the doorway three sharp sets of eyes locked on to me. Arturo's gaze was the hardest.

"Um, hi."

The men's typing had stopped, Arturo's pacing had stopped, the room was deadly silent.

"I'm back," I continued when nobody made a move to speak. "I'm okay. I'm here. Nobody has hurt me, I haven't been kidnapped."

Still nobody spoke. Evidently Arturo's men were waiting for their orders, and right now I was worried he might burst a blood vessel the way he was staring at me.

I felt Amber's presence behind me in the doorway. Arturo's gaze flickered to her and my body sagged with relief but in a second his eyes were back on me.

"We went for dinner," Amber said. "It was nice."

The corner of Arturo's mouth twitched down almost involuntarily. I really was worried he was going to have an aneurism or something.

"Also I broke my –"

"I went to see Lucas." I cut Amber off and stepped forward. Arturo's cold gaze dropped by a few degrees, if that was possible, his eyes narrowing into slits. I kept my head held high as I continued, my voice shaking slightly. "I went to see Lucas because he's my friend and I missed him. I threw Amber's phone in a glass of water so you couldn't track us."

His gaze didn't falter.

"I'm not sorry," I tacked on, folding my arms.

Finally Arturo reacted. He didn't look away from me, but with a low growl he said, "everybody out."

The two guys with the laptops quickly snapped them closed and rushed out of the room so I followed them hurriedly, my heart pounding at a thousand miles an hour.

When I reached the doorway I felt a hand clamp down on my arm, hard. "Not you," Arturo snarled.

Amber was lingering just a few feet away but before I could say anything I had been pulled back into the kitchen, the door shut behind me. I stood still, facing the wood with my back to Arturo, and took a deep breath. For the longest time I didn't dare turn around.

"Florence."

I didn't move.

"Look at me," he commanded. His voice wasn't as livid as it had been before, it was more controlled but just as icy.

I did as he said and found that Arturo was sitting on a chair by the island. He was still watching me, his eyes just as dark as before. "Sit down," he gestured to the chair opposite his. I didn't like his tone, how flat and empty it was. He was shutting down right in front of me, just like he did with enemies.

It made me ball my hands into fists. "I'd rather stand."

"Sit."

My eyes trailed over the table top until they came to rest on a hand gun that was to the right of Arturo. It looked like it had been discarded there casually rather than deliberately to scare me, but there was no way in hell I was taking a step closer.

Arturo's eyes followed mine and he slid the gun across the counter in my direction. I jumped at the sound of the metal scraping. "Take it," he sighed.

Why did he seem so...defeated?

"B-but..."

"If you need a gun to feel like you can have a conversation with me, then by all means." He opened his hands in a wide gesture.

Inching closer, I reached for the gun. It was heavy and cold in my hands, a death machine dying to be used. I didn't like the feel of it. I didn't like the power, what it stood for, I didn't even like the safety it should have given me.

I didn't think Arturo would shoot me. I didn't want to shoot him. I just wanted everything to be simple, I wanted the mafia to go away so that we could be normal. I yearned for it, for a world where Arturo and I could be in love normally. Like normal people with boring jobs and a dog and a small house.

My hands shook as I emptied the gun of ammunition, the bullets dropping into my left palm. Once empty, I put it back on the table, then dropped each bullet beside it, one by one.

Then, finally, I sat down.

Arturo was still watching me, his expression like a raging storm. He drummed his fingers on the counter, but he didn't speak. He was waiting for me, and suddenly the lump in my throat felt like a rock. There were plenty of things I wanted – no, needed – to say, but I couldn't bring myself to voice a single one.

"I don't know what else to say," I admitted.

He let out a long, deep sigh. Then, for the first time since I'd got back, Arturo looked away from me. He dropped his gaze, stared down at the table so that strands of hair fell over his forehead and obscured my view.

"Did you fuck him?" he asked very quietly.

This time when he spoke Arturo's voice was shaky. He was terrified that I had done the unforgivable, that I'd betrayed him and given myself to another man. Before, surrounded by two of his men, he had affected a bravado that had even me convinced.

Now it was just the two of us, and he wasn't pretending any more. I didn't think I'd ever seen him look so vulnerable.

"Florence?"

It was hard to stay focused on what I desperately needed to talk to him about when all I wanted to do was wrap my arms around him and promise I was his, I was here, I always would be.

"I didn't fuck him," I said truthfully. My voice was just as quiet, but stronger. I had to stay strong. "I don't see Lucas like that. He's a kind man, a good friend."

Letting out another breath, Arturo looked up at me. He was clearly gauging the truth of my response.

I reached over and rested my hands over the top of his, running my thumbs over his busted knuckles. He must have taken his anger out on something; they were still bleeding.

"I didn't fuck him, Arturo," I repeated gently. "I wouldn't. You know I wouldn't."

"How do I know anything when you work so damn hard to hide from me! I had Marco out all afternoon looking for you, damnit!" His voice got louder now. "You could have been killed!"

"I know –"

"Do you have any idea what it would do to me if you ever got hurt?" He pulled me forward by my hands until I was leaning across the table, my face inches from his. "I couldn't bare it, I –"

"Arturo, let me go. That hurts." I pulled my wrists back and took a seat again, rubbing them gently in my lap. "I didn't get hurt. Lucas can keep me safe."

"It isn't Lucas' job to keep you fucking safe!" In one quick motion his right hand darted out, sending a vase of flowers shattering against the floor.

"Arturo," I chided, getting up to clean up the mess.

Again, he grabbed my wrist to stop me. "Leave it."

I sat back down and he released me.

"I don't want you seeing him again," Arturo snapped.

"And I don't want you tracking me, so I guess we've reached an impasse." I folded my arms. "I mean, seriously, Arturo? I thought you were being considerate when you sent Amber, I thought you were being nice. For a second, I thought you'd actually listened to me, but it turns out you were just doing it to keep tabs on me! You can't control everything to do with me, I'm a human! I have a free will, and thoughts, and emotions, I'm allowed to see other people from time to time and have friends. I'm not some fucking doll for you to play house with."

"I know that," he snapped. Then his voice grew softer, the ice behind his eyes thawing somewhat. His expression darkened, but it wasn't with anger...it was with sadness. He reached across for my hands and for some reason I let him take them.

He laced his fingers with mine, the warmth of his skin sending shivers over mine despite my anger. He pulled our entwined hands closer to him, then slowly leaned down and pressed his lips to them. I could feel his breath against my fingertips, his eyelashes brushing my wrists. "I don't know how many times I can tell you how much you mean to me," he admitted quietly.

I hadn't seen Arturo like this before, and it made my heart stutter. I'd come in prepared for the worst, for everything between us to explode as it so often did...but this? This I had never been prepared for.

"I know..." I trailed off in a whisper.

"I love you, Florence. More than breathing, I do." Each time his lips grazed my skin a spark of electricity shot through me. Carefully, he turned my left hand over and pressed a gentle kiss to the skin on the inside of my wrist. With my spare hand, I reached across and brushed strands of hair away from his forehead causing him to look up at me with his mouth still against me. "I cannot live without you," he breathed.

"I...I love you too." There were tears in my eyes and my voice was thick.

Without taking his eyes off me, he took my other hand and did the exact same, his tongue leaving a slight dampness on my wrist from his kiss. I wanted more.

I wanted so much more. But I had to concentrate.

"I track you because I love you. I track you not because I want to keep tabs on who you are friends with or where you go. Not because I get some sick kick out of being a control freak, although I am one."

He abandoned my right hand and went back to my left, holding it up in front of his face as though he might kiss it. "I track you because there are people out there who want to hurt you, there are people out there who want to use you, and if I ever lost you..." He kissed the pad of my thumb gently. "If I ever lost you I would never forgive myself."

"I– I know," I stammered. "I don't want to lose you." I didn't want us to be having this conversation right now but I couldn't stop myself. I couldn't stop myself because it was the truth.

His lips moved on to my index finger, brushing it so gently I barely felt it except that I always felt Arturo touching me. "I shouldn't have lied to you, il mio amore. This life is dangerous, as you know," he reached with his spare hand to cup my cheek and I leaned into his palm. "I am not good at being open. I haven't...done this, in a long time."

I bit back tears, unable to believe that this was happening. In my wildest dreams I'd never imagined Arturo opening up this much, all I wanted to do was throw my arms around him, but one thing was still playing on my mind.

Arturo's eyes shifted from my hand to my face and the air buzzed between us. I lost my breath every time he looked at me, but now, with so much vulnerability in his eyes...

"I haven't done this in a long time," he continued, kissing the pad of my middle finger. "But I know that I don't want to do it with anyone else again. Not ever."

"You don't have to. I'm here. I'm here."

His lips hesitated and he let out a shaky breath. "I know I can't promise you a fairytale, Florence, and you deserve one. You deserve a man who can give you the world, a man who hasn't got blood on his hands." A crease appeared between his brows but I reached across with my right hand to smooth it out.

"I don't want any of that," I said quietly. "I want you."

"I can't promise you a fairytale." His eyes searched mine and the intensity stole my breath. His lips moved slowly on to my next finger, my ring finger.

Suddenly my blood turned to ice and I froze. Oh my god. Oh my god.

Arturo kissed the finger. "All I can promise you is that I will love you with every beat of my heart."

"Arturo -"

"Shh." He rubbed his thumb over my bottom lip but I couldn't move, couldn't think, I was paralysed. "I need you to know that, Florence. I want to prove to you, every day, how much I need and love you. I want you -"

"Arturo, stop."