I sat at the round table in the library, ignoring the curious looks shot at me as people wondered what went wrong. One moment life seemed perfect for me, the next I had broken up with James, walking around half alive – if even that.

You could say that I had taken it hard.

Black bags marked my eyes from lack of sleep; the nightmares now full force, as I am helpless to relive the past and am currently unable to run from the present.

James continuously tried to talk to me, even going as far to stop a Quidditch match. Safe to say that I had now quit the team.

My one safe haven, my one tie to sanity had been ripped from me. The sad thing was that it truly was never mine to begin with, it was a façade.

Everything was a fucking lie.

I glared at curious onlookers, no longer willing to ignore their jabs and constant reminders, "Surely you have something better to do," I snapped, pushing my chair back, collecting my books and sending one last hateful glance towards my peers.

I walked further down the shelves, putting the books I had borrowed for my Charms essay back in place. How had everything changed so quickly? One moment it was peaceful, serene, happy. But now? Now I was a mess, angry, sad, unhappy.

But most of all I was lost.

Where did I go from here?

"That was quite entertaining," a voice mused, stirring me from my thoughts.

I glanced in the direction of the voice, dark brown eyes meeting cold, steel blue.

"Regulus, Regulus Black." He introduced himself, holding a hand out for me to shake.

I lean forward to shake his hand, wary of his green robes. "Lilah,"

"I know who you are," he chuckled, "I'm sure everyone does by this point."

"Right," I mumbled, aware of the rumours and controversy surrounding the breakup.

"This isn't the end, you know. Everyone has their fair share of bad breakups; you'd do best to hide it better though. It'll help with the rumours." He pulled a red apple from his robe, biting into it before smiling wickedly. "See you around, Lupin."

"Sure," I nodded, a little confused, but accepted the possibility of seeing him around nonetheless.

I walked back to my dorm, bypassing the hall as I wasn't hungry, having eaten breakfast not even an hour beforehand. Also because my friends were in there – friends I had ignored for the past few weeks.

I walk past the door, eager to avoid any type of confrontation that was bound to happen sooner or later. Hopefully later.

"Lilah!"

Apparently later was too much to ask for.

I swivel on my feet, strands from my messy bun flying on my face, looking at a solemn Sirius Black.

"Lilah?" He cooed, taking a few cautious steps forward as if he was approaching a frightened animal.

"Yes, Sirius?" I cooed sarcastically, not having enough energy to laugh at his indignant expression.

"We just want to help you, could you stop being a bitch for one second so that we can catch a break?" He spat, apparently fed up with my behaviour.

I stilled at his words, smiling sadly at him, "Merlin forbid that I don't fake a smile anymore because surely me expressing my emotions is the end of the world. You claim that you want to help me, Iri, yet the second half of that statement totally contradicts it. You want me to smile, laugh like everything is alright so that you can feel better. You're not doing this for me, so lets cut the bullshit."

"So drinking is expressing your emotions? Snapping at everyone who even looks at you? Late nights with Merlin knows who? I didn't realise how much fun you liked to have, especially since you just broke James' heart." He spat, fury spilling into words only uttered because of anger, but words uttered nonetheless.

"Because it's his heart that was broken, wasn't it?" I mumbled, my eyes catching sad blue ones by the entrance to the hall. "Because everything is my fault. Because surely he loved me so much that I broke his heart and am now fucking every guy available. All because I couldn't stay asleep through one conversation. How stupid of me. I apologise."

I caught the exact moment the two men caught on, heartbreak etched onto their faces, words escaping them as they realised that I knew.

I chuckled, biting my lip in despair as I looked at what was once two of the most important people in my life, "That's what I thought." I slowly walked backwards, shaking my head in disbelief before turning my back to them as they had done to me.

"Love, wait," a voice croaked, cracking fiercely with emotion.

"No James," I whispered, refusing to face him again. "I'm done waiting."

And with that, I walked away.

And not once did I look back.