It's my BIRTHDAY!!! Can't believe I'm 19 today wtf!!!

***

By the time I reach the doors of the Institute I'm numb with cold and shock, caked in dirt and completely immobile...like a zombie.

That is, until I spot Alec, sitting on a bed in the same place Clary and I'd been taken when we'd first arrived her. He had a huge, gaping wound on his arm and he was wincing in pain.

"Alec" I cry, bolting over and kneeling before him, "Oh my God, what happened?"

"A Forsaken attack" Izzy explains, "They were coming after Hodge."

"Like the one that tried to kill Luke?"

Izzy nods, giving me a questioning look. I shake my head, mouthing 'later,' noticing the presence of another man in the room, one I hadn't met before

"Who are you?" he asks, frowning

"Sorry...uh, Camille Fra-Fairchild" I correct, offering him my hand

"Robert Lightwood" he nods, shaking my hand and giving me a warm smile, "Nice to meet you."

"Uh, nice to meet you...too" I stammer, taken aback by his kindness, something I was not expecting after my conversations with Maryse

"Don't squirm" Robert scolds Alec as he spasms slightly

"I'm not" Alec defends and I roll my eyes - he so was, "it doesn't even hurt."

"Yeah, right" I scoff lowly, so low only Alec can hear

He glares at me playfully, but there's something in his eyes, something I saw the other night, when he took me to bed after saving Luke...he looked guilty.

Alec's phone begins to ring and he pulls it out but Izzy takes it before he can answer it, "No talking. Just healing."

Izzy takes the phone from him with no further protest from Alec and answers it herself, walking away from us. I take the opportunity to steal her spot beside Alec on the bed, clutching his hand in mine.

The last thing I expected was for him to pull away, but he did. I feel the hurt and rejection flood through me but attempt to push it down, instead pulling my hand back towards myself hastily, as if it had been burnt.

"How did that thing even get in here?" I ask, "I thought there were...wards to protect against this kind of thing."

"This one was different. It had Seelie blood with angel properties" Robert explains

"Something tells me that's not normal"

"Not just not normal" Robert corrects, "Impossible."

"Do you know what it was after?" I question

"No idea" Robert admits, "We assume, like the attack at the Jade Wolf, that it was after Hodge, considering he's an ex-Circle member"

As Robert explains, Alec catches my eye, giving me a heavy look.

Oh.

Of course.

It was after the Cup.

***

"Are the wards solid now?" Robert inquires as Magnus works his magic just before the training room doors, "Nothing will get through?"

"Even my magic has limits" Magnus sighs, "The wards won't hold off that Forsaken attack. But my protections will slow them down."

"Extra time is priceless" Robert grants and, again, I'm shocked by his kindness. If Maryse were here I'm sure she'd be demanding a full-on protection spell that would self-slice any Forsaken that dared try to enter.

Thank God she's not.

"Ha. Say that after you get my bill" Magnus raises an eyebrow and I bite my lip to stop my giggle from excaping

"Lydia will take care of that" Robert assures him, passing Magnus and turning the corner.

I notice the wince as Lydia's name is brought up, followed by a guilty glance at me that I'm sure he thought I didn't see.

What was up with him today?

"A Forsake wound often needs a little warlock TLC" Magnus offers, "May I? Uh, free of charge."

"It's okay" Alec snaps, pulling away from him, "I'm fine."

"Alec, just accept the help" I plead, "If anything were to happen to you I-"

"Cami...I'm good" Alec barks and I recoil, "Look, I gotta-I gotta go."

With that Alec descends the stairs and disappears within seconds.

"Trouble in paradise?" Magnus muses

"Can't have the trouble when there's no paradise in the first place" I sigh

"Touché" Magnus nods, "Do you know where I can find this Lydia person? Payment upfront is just smart business."

"No clue" I confess, "Best bet is the Head's office. She's probably sitting there being all calculating and superior."

"Mmm I suppose the familial bond hasn't quite settled in?" Magnus assumes and when I give him a questioning look he continues, "I've been around for a long time, Buttercup."

"Yeah, well, I'm not her biggest fan" I huff and Magnus gives me an 'elaborate' look, "She kind of...flirted with Alec a little."

"Ah the nail in the coffin" Magnus smirks and I cringe. It felt ridiculous being so petty about a man that wasn't mine but I couldn't help it, "How glad I am that my crush faded so we could become friends."

"We're friends now?" I chuckle

"You have my number, don't you?" Magnus points out, "That, my dear, is a rare honour."

"Consider me touched" I sass and Magnus ruffles my hair. I glare at him, "Go off and find the bank, Magnus. Get paid before Lydia finds an excuse to rip you off"

"Oof" Magnus hisses, "Ice ice baby"

"Shut up" I laugh

Though it was a strange sight for people to behold, I'm sure...I was glad I had a friend within this crazy, mixed up world.

Of course, I counted Izzy and Jace and...and Alec as friends as well, there was just something so light and uncomplicated about Magnus.

He made me feel human again, if only for a while.

And that's something I need right now.

***

"She calls Meliorn in and arrests him, then acts like it's all out of her hands!" Izzy rants as Alec repeatedly punches a punching bag

We were back in the training room again, awaiting Jace's arrival as Izzy ranted about her conflict with Lydia.

This girl certainly isn't winning any popularity contest, that's for sure.

"You're gonna hurt yourself" Izzy sighs as Alec's blows land harder and faster against the plastic

"I'm fine, Izzy!" Alec spits, but he cradles his injured arm, wincing minutely, "And it was the Clave that gave the order, not Lydia."

"Are you sure about that?" I scoff, "Seems just like her."

"Hey" Jace speaks up, running up the stairs, regarding Alec, "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine" Alec repeats softly

"I just spoke to Robert and Maryse. They're being sent back to Idris."

"What?" Izzy exclaims

"Yeah"

"Another order from Lydia?" Izzy snarls

"Who's Lydia?" Jace frowns

"My bitchy cousin and the current Clave envoy in charge of the Institute" I inform him

"She's what?" Jace growls

"Temporarily" Alec defends and I cross my arms, facing him

Why was he running to her defense?

"And now she's convinced the Clave that Mom and Dad aren't doing their job?" Izzy says, getting angrier by the second

"Well, maybe they aren't" Alec considers and we all gape at him. Alec, who agreed with his parents every word was now criticising their leadership skills?

The world must be ending.

"The Institute was under their control when the Forsaken got in."

"What are you talking about?" I deride, "Lydia's been in charge since this morning and the attack happened tonight."

"Mom and Dad were members of the Circle" Alec announces and my eyes widen.

I knew he was holding a grudge against them for that but why would he announce it like this? The way it'd been sprung on him not even 12 hours ago.

"What? They don't have Circle runes..." Izzy voices

"Because they made a deal with the Clave prior to the Uprising" Alec explains, "In exchange for their cooperation, they were pardoned"

"Your questioning their loyalty?" Izzy gawks

"Valentine is back" Alec presses, "The Circle is rising. They're under suspicion"

"No way" Jace rejects, "Robert and Maryse took me in. They raise me as one of their own. I know what kind of people they are."

"Are you sure?" Alec counters, "They lied to us! For years, they've been telling us how to act. That we have to uphold the Lightwood name. Well, they're the ones who tarnished it. They're hypocrites."

"You must be Jace Wayland" Lydia's voice flows through the room and I exhale frustratedly.

Great, more annoyances.

"Lydia Branwell" she introduces, extending her hand, "You're quite the legend back in Idris."

Jace keeps his arms crossed, rejecting the handshake and I smirk slightly, "Don't believe everything you hear."

"Did you tell them?" Lydia asks Alec, looking up at him

I frown, turning to look Alec dead in the eye. Again, he looks guilty and he's looking everywhere but at me.

Jesus...what is this that's got him feeling so guilty?

"Tell us what?" Izzy growls

"Lydia and I are...engaged"

Engaged.

Engaged.

Engaged.

The word rings through my ears as if he'd shouted them in an empty church. I stumble back on my feet slightly, gripping Jace's arm for support

"Stupid heels" I mutter but no one seems to be paying attention to me, they're all wrapped up in their own shock

"We're getting married" Lydia beams and I restrain the urge to pounce and throttle her to death

"You're not serious" Jace scoffs

"You were supposed to tell them 'no'" Izzy chimes in

Izzy knew about this?

Oh this just keeps getting better and better.

A conversation from earlier rings in the back of my head like a bell. When Lydia had asked Alec that she'd heard rumours of him being ready to settle down and he'd refused the notion being one of his own creation...

Of course.

To uphold the Lightwood name, his parents had asked him to marry. Obviously, someone from a good family who would bring honour with them.

I feel my chest lighten but in only the minisculest of ways.

What happened to his feelings for me? Did they just disappear?

That's when it all clicks together.

That guilty look he had been giving me recently, it must be because of this. Because he knew it would hurt me.

I resolve to stand straight, replacing my shocked and hurt expression with one of masked nonchalance.

I was determined to look like I didn't care even though I did.

I really, really did.

"It's your life to ruin" Izzy barks, turning on the spot and stalking out

"Congratulations" I snarl, letting my anger lash out a bit, "I'm sure the wedding will be delightful"

Alec opens his mouth to speak but I turn on my heel, departing as quickly as my feet would carry me, trying to squint the heavy tears from my eyes.