《Speak (Bakugou Katsuki x Reader)》[51; don't leave me]
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You'd never been more scared in your entire life.
Tears streamed down your cheeks, seemingly endless in their plight. Your chest was heaving spasmodically; it felt like you'd forgotten how to breathe. The faint flicker of the lamp on your nightstand cast shadows across the room.
You blinked once, then twice. All you could see was white.
Katsuki-kun.
You needed to see him right now, to hear him, to touch him, to feel his presence. To know that he was still here, the way he'd always been. To know that he hadn't left you.
A hot, searing pain had surged all throughout your body. You weren't able to form clear, lucid thoughts, but luckily, your body acted from muscle-memory alone. Before you could take another shallow, staggering breath, you were already gripping at your doorknob with cold, quivering fingers. The halls were dark, but your feet led you forward. Katsuki's room was on the uppermost floor, just like your own. Down the hallway, turn left at the bend, cross over to the opposite side.
You were hovering in front of his door now, tears sliding down your temples and slinking off your chin. Your chest, your head, your heart—everything hurt so fucking much. The breaths escaping your lips sounded more like frantic gasps now than anything else.
The first knock was tentative, and quiet. "Katsuki-kun?" you called.
No answer.
The ones that followed became frenzied, and your knuckles barely made contact against the door with how hurriedly you were shaking your fist. By now, your vision should've adjusted to the dark somewhat, but all you saw was black. Black, mixed in with the specks of white flitting before your eyelids.
Once again, no answer.
You staggered forward, feeling nauseous and faint all at once. Your knuckles hit the door again; a single, clunky blow that was dead before it even connected. Your breathing had transitioned to hyperventilation now, voice a strangled, choked-out mess.
"Katsuki-kun," you sobbed, knocking limply at the door over and over again. "Please... please answer. I'm begging you..."
Not a single sound from inside the room. He wasn't that deep of a sleeper. Your dream kept replaying in your mind, and god—you just couldn't bear it any longer.
"KATSUKI-KUN!!"
You wailed out at the top of your lungs, uncaring as to who heard you and who you awoke. Your teeth clenched together, and you sucked in a breath of air, holding it in your lungs until it felt as though they would burst. The tears kept pouring down your face, but you paid them no heed. It didn't matter. Nothing mattered right now except him, so why wasn't he answering...?!
"Answer me!" you cried out. "I'm not going anywhere until you open this door! Answer me, answer me, please just—"
"[Name]-chan...?"
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A voice, but not the one you'd been so desperate to hear. The door to the room besides Katsuki's had just opened a crack, with Kirshima's groggy, half-lidded eyes staring back at you.
"What's happening?" he asked, stepping outside his room. Once he saw the tears flooding down your cheeks, his entire expression went rigid. "A-Are you okay? What happened? Why are you crying?"
You resumed knocking on Katsuki's door, ignoring the redhead altogether.
"Open up, open up, open up...!"
"[Name]-chan, seriously, what's happening—"
"LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!!"
Kirishima's eyes widened, but you were outright wailing like a wounded animal now. He tried to grab you by the shoulders, but you elbowed him off and continued pounding at the door. You were nothing more than a broken record player, and your knuckles were swollen and raw, but it didn't matter. Nothing mattered. If Katsuki wasn't with you, nothing mattered anymore.
You crumpled to the ground, gasping for breath, Kirishima rushing to a crouch just beside you.
This can't be happening. This can't seriously be happening. What did I do to deserve this? What did we do to deserve this? I swear, I'll give my life instead if he'd just—
"Holy fucking shit. What's going on out here...?"
You went utterly still, save for the droplets of tears hitting the floor. The wrench in your heart had just been yanked out, leaving a wide, gaping hole in its wake. You lifted your head.
"K-Katsuki-kun..."
It was him. Hovering just above you, with his door swung open, blonde locks even more tousled from sleeping, and crimson orbs trembling as though they'd just seen a ghost. He was right in front of you. It was actually him, in the flesh. Breathing right before your eyes.
"I don't know what's happening," Kirishima spluttered out. "I just woke up and found her screaming—"
You were in his arms without sparing a breath. The redhead lurched backwards, giving you room to bury your head in Katsuki's chest and dig your fingers into the back of his shirt. Katsuki wheezed from the sudden impact, but let his arms fall around your waist. He was touching you. You could feel him. This was real.
From down the hall, Shouji had awoken as well, but Katsuki merely waved both his classmates off. "It's fine," he rasped. "I've got it from here. Don't let Aizawa find out about this. I'll take care of [Name]."
"Are you sure?" Kirishima asked, eyes laced with concern.
"Yeah, she'll be okay. I don't think she's in pain or anything, just... we'll sort it out."
Katsuki pulled you into the room before your sobs could awaken anyone else. You were still clinging to his frame, whimpering and shaking uncontrollably. He kept you close while switching on the lamp by his desk, and promptly grabbed you into his arms and led you to the bed.
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"Okay," he breathed out, gripping you by the waist. "So... help me understand what's happening. I'm totally fucking lost here. Did someone say some nasty shit to you? 'Cause I swear to god, I don't give a fuck who it is, I'll bash their damn head in if—"
You shook your head. "No..."
"No? Then what is it?"
"...gone..."
"Gone? What's gone?" Katsuki shook you gently, nudging your chin so that you could meet his eyes. "Come on, [Name]. I can't help you if don't tell me."
"It's not—" You gasped for breath. The panic attack from earlier had left you feeling faint and numb. Your fingers palmed the edge of your shirt. "I-I'll just show you..."
The fabric shifted to reveal your bare, un-inked hip. Your skin was flushed from when you'd been frantically rubbing at it earlier, but other than that, it was desolate, like a blank canvas. No writing in sight.
Even in the dim lighting, you didn't miss the way Katsuki's crimson orbs widened. At first, he was completely silent, just taking it all in. Eventually, a tentative finger reached out to prod the bit of exposed skin. He must've been mystified; it wasn't as though you could ever feel the soulmate mark with your fingers. Or maybe he was trying to rub at the surface and see if the words were hiding somewhere underneath.
"Huh."
It was all he said, and he retracted his forefinger without another word. You sniffled again, wiping away another wave of the seemingly endless tears.
"I thought you were dead," you choked out. "I-I had a dream—a nightmare—and you just... I woke up, and it was gone. It was gone, and I thought you were gone, too. And I just... o-oh. I'm getting sick again just thinking of it..."
You let your head fall against Katsuki's chest, forcing yourself to take in a big gulp of air in the hopes of clearing the haze in your mind. He stood still for a few moments. You felt his fingers graze by your cheek, a faint, almost inaudible sigh slipping from his lips.
"What a relief, eh?"
Your head shot upwards. Katsuki was gazing down at you with a gentle smile.
"I mean, even though it's gone, I'm still here, aren't I? This just proves that if something bad were to happen, it would've already happened by now." He gripped you by the shoulder, chin quivering just so. "It's done, [Name]. We did it. That shitty mark isn't gonna give us anymore trouble from here on."
You didn't know whether to laugh or cry even more. Katsuki shuddered softly, leaning in to rest his forehead flush against your own. He was right. The writing had completely disappeared, and yet neither of you had been harmed. All this time... all this worrying, all this grief... for nothing.
"...we're going to be okay?" you breathed out, unable to believe your own words. Katsuki smiled again. You thought you noticed small tears prickling at the corners of his eyes.
"Yeah, babe. We're going to be okay."
Just like that, you crumpled in his arms. This time, your tears were a surge of joy and relief. It was over. It was finally over. You'd survived—you'd both endured this much, for so long. The hell if anything was going to beat you down after this.
Even so, you cried. You cried for everything; all the pain you'd been shouldering, all the fears and nightmares which had been festering in your chest. You cried it all out, nestled in the crook of Katsuki's shoulder, his fingers stroking your hair over and over again.
"D-Don't go anywhere... please..."
"I'm not going anywhere, I promise."
You wanted to stop sobbing, but you were too overcome with the swell of emotion. You wanted nothing more than to smile and bask in the moment, knowing that all your efforts until now hadn't been in vain. You wanted for Katsuki to know just how happy you were, that he was right here by your side.
"Katsuki-kun."
You pulled away from his chest and caressed his cheeks. Your fingers were trembling. He was warm to the touch, real.
A moment later and you were kissing him, with a fervor and passion that you didn't know you were even capable of. The tears were still coming quickly, wetting your cheeks and matting strands of your hair. You must've looked like an absolute nightmare, but the way Katsuki embraced you made it known that he couldn't care less.
He kissed you once, twice, then relentlessly, barely even pulling away for breath. You thought you heard him whimpering softly, a faint, hushed tune mixed in with the cacophony of your own sobs. It was all raw emotion, set out and laid bare.
"Come here," Katsuki breathed, pulling you down against the mattress. He let you settle in the space beside him before slamming his lips against your own again, frenzied and desperate. Your mouth was burning now, skin hot and chafed. You didn't care. You wanted to kiss him over and over again, to lose consciousness in his blistering embrace.
Your eyelids were gradually slipping to a close, body deflating on the spot. You still didn't care. Katsuki hugged you so tight it felt like your heart would burst. As your mind filled with black, you heard him whispering against the shell of your ear.
"I love you, [Name]."
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