I shiver as you run your finger down

My naked spine, I never gave you permission To strip me down, yet you took my clothes

Off anyways and with them you took my trust And confidence and threw them in the dirt

I shiver as I sit curled up in a ball

On my bed, as nightmare after nightmare

Steal my sleep and scare me into submission

Tears fall down and puddle in my bedclothes,

And I remember how you taught me to

Hate myself, and made me believe that I

Was responsible for all the things you did

To me, but you disappeared before you

Could be brought to justice

And I was left to pick up the pieces of my being

To try to attempt to put them back together

I shiver, many years later, as a man I love

Tries to touch me with my permission

And tries to comfort me and assure me

That he isn't going to hurt me

But I can't shake the memories you burned

Into my mind, how you reminded me day

After day that no one would ever love me or

Believe me, if I ever tried to come forward

So, thank you for ruining me

And for making me believe that I am nothing