Three weeks...

He told me I had three weeks left...

I walked all the way back to my dorm, staring at the ground and my hands hugged my chest tight. My back felt heavy. I couldn't think at all...

And Mikan....

I had to kill her now or have Aoi killed. I know I said it so many times before but saying it now made my heart drop to the ground. I fell on my hands and knees and breathed hard through my mouth.

"Ha... ha... ha..." I coughed. I couldn't breath, couldn't. I was having a panic attack. Tears stung my eyes but I wouldn't let them fall. "Mhm!" I bit my lip and held the cries my body urged to escape.

Why is this happening to me? Why do I feel this way?

"Natsume?" I looked up and my chest rose up slowly, recovering from my attack. The tears stayed were they were and even when they didn't fall, my cheeks still felt wet. Through my sparkling eyes, I saw a girl with long black hair. Bangs covered her eyes, so I couldn't tell who she was. Why would a girl be out this late?

I looked down again and ignored the girl.

"Natsume~! What's wrong?" She said. I shook my head and gulped. My attack went away and I no longer felt that heavy weight in my chest.

"I'm sad." I touched my mouth and hadn't realized I said it out loud.

"Hm..." the girl hummed. "Come with me then." She pulled me up and dragged me to an unknown direction. The girl looked kinda like me... I think I might have seen a speck of red in her eyes.

"Where...?" I said dreamily.

"It's a surprise." She tapped her lips and grinned. "Natsume... how's Aoi?" I was looking at her dress that was as white as snow. I looked up surprised.

"Aoi? I don't know how she is." I said grimly. The girl nodded like she understood, even when I know no one could possibly understand the situation.

"I see... I'll make sure that she's fine."

"How?" I whispered. The girl was a little odd I have to say... it seemed like she knew almost everything about me.

"You can worry about Mikan instead and I'll look over Aoi for you."

"But..." I paused, "I have to kill Mikan to save Aoi."

"What if you don't kill her?" my mouth made a firm line. Somehow, the thought never occurred to me... IF I don't end up killing her.

"If I don't kill her... Aoi will die."

"What will happen to Mikan?"

"She'll... live?" it came out as more of a question.

"Yes."

The girl finally turned to look at me with her eyes wide open. I was right, only her eyes were completely red like mine. Crimson like the color of blood.

"Who are you?" suddenly wanting to know who the girl was, struck me with a hint of curiosity.

This was one of those cliche moments in which you have to ask to know the person. But to me, this moment... felt like a dream. In which you run through a field, and someone is holding your hand towards a certain direction. It's an endless dream and it takes you somewhere incredible.

"Well... that's for me to know and you to find out. If you had my Alice, then you'd definitely know who I am..." She smirked and that brought my eyes to squint at her. Her smirk was really familiar. It was almost as if I was looking through a mirror.

"You..." I started but she interrupted me.

"We're here. Come Natsume..." We ended up in front of a house. It's pouring all of a sudden and I'm trying to make out the people in the house. A family of three it seems. An old man, young woman, and a girl about... maybe 6 years of age. She has hazel eyes and the same light brown hair as the woman who I suppose is her mother. Hey... where's her father? She must have the same hazel eyes as him because the woman has grey eyes. At least that's what I think... "That little girl is Mikan."

"Eh?" I wiped my eyes, and squinted through the misty window. "H-how?"

"That's her mother, Yuka and the old man is her grandpa."

"W-where is... her father?" I whispered.

"He's.... well... he died before Mikan was born." She looked down, a smile still on her face but it seemed so sad that it came out kinda creepy.

"How is it that I'm able to see her?"

"I told you..." She chuckled, "It's for me to know and you to find out."

"Why are you showing me this?" I faced her and looked away from Mikan and her family.

"Because you need to know for sure, who she really is. Don't you know... that you can only truly love someone when you know everything about them. Their bad and good qualities and the flaws they've committed? Natsume... you have been given a mission to kill this girl, am I right?"

I avoided her piercing stare and clenched my jaw. "That's right."

"She's not what you think she is... She's more than what you think she is. If anything... I think she's the key to saving you from the darkness Natsume. That's why I'm showing you this. Now can you shut it and watch what I show you?"

I scowled and nodded.

"Come on... Let's find out who she truly is."

"Scene 1: 'Mikan grows up'!" the girl said in a loud voice. Jeez... why is she so loud. Most of all... how does she know so much about Mikan and I? My suspicious can only grow narrow.

She showed me the most important scene in each of her years. Like on her 7th birthday, Mikan ended up celebrating it by herself with her grandpa because her mother had to work late. At age 10, Mikan was the most beautiful and popular girl at her school. All the boys idolized her and all the girls wanted to be like her. She even smiled back then. Everyone fell in love with her whole being. But her friends constantly bullied her because they were jealous. She ended up being isolated by the girls and hanging out with only boys. It was a good thing that Ruka was there, because he protected her from everyone. Both boys and girls.

Even so, in every scene that flashed before me. First she'd undoubtedly smile, and then her lips would form a firm line. As if she were hiding something.

By the age of 13, her mother died of unknown reasons. Mikan fell under despair and Ruka was the only one who knew of this. No one but them and her grandpa attended the funeral.

After that, Mikan was rescued by the Anti-Alice organization and recruited as one of their own. She used her Alice all of the time and fell ill for several of weeks after each mission. Eventually she was unable to care for herself. Her grandpa had died too.

"Why are you showing me this?" I asked again.

"I told you... you need to know the person you're going to kill Natsume. You need to know." Her face was almost as pained as mine but she was almost at the verge of tears when the scene when Mikan's mother died was flashing before us. She must have known her then.

"I don't think I can take much more of this..."

"Trust me... this is hard for me too. Yuka was my best friend." She smiled sadly.

"How did she die?" I know I shouldn't have asked but I had to know. The girl's jaw clenched and her hands formed fists angrily. Then she turned around, wiping her eyes.

"She was killed." She said through her clenched teeth.

As I was about to say something more she coughed,

"Let's just go onto the next scene."

Mikan was hospitalize for the remaining part of her life. Ruka eventually stopped coming for a period of time because he had to work and manage school. She felt alone and cried by herself often. It was then that her therapist requested a helper to keep her company and help her during times of crisis.

But what angered me the most was when she had been hospitalized, she was still sent on missions. She had to sneak out of her room each and everyday. The day before she coughed out blood, she was sent on a mission which got her stabbed in the stomach by an Alice user. Now it all started to make sense. Why she wasn't allowed to go outside... and why she looked so frail and weak.

Like she could fall any minute.

It also made sense why she couldn't be a singer. The only part I don't understand was why she couldn't sing. She told me she'd never sing again... yet Mikan is so amazing at singing. It seems... I still have yet to figure out why some things are out of place.

"Mikan was always weak since she was a child."

The girl interrupted my thoughts, "Yuka couldn't support her very well when she was born. Mikan had to be hooked up to a machine in order to breath and live."

"How come she can't sing?" I whispered. Maybe I didn't want to hear the answer. Maybe I whispered it so that she couldn't hear. I was just voicing out my thoughts.

"It's not that she can't sing... it's more like she's not willing to sing."

"Why?"

"It's because, Mikan's voice sounds just like Yuka's. So every time she sings, she is reminded of her mother and that causes her to break down. It has contributed to her sickness as well."

"She gets sick when she sings?"

"That's right. You may think it's ridiculous but that's something that she cannot do."

"But... she loves to sing. S-she wants to be a singer when she..." I covered my mouth and stopped.

"I know." she looked away and brushed her hair out of her eyes.

"She's dying... but why does the Principle want her killed?" my breath got caught in my throat from all the anger that I felt.

"He's afraid of her. He's afraid that she'll kill him before she dies."

"And Mikan refuses to be on his side."

"That's right. Do you know why?" she smiled a little. I shook my head. How would I know, Mikan's reasons for refusing his side?

"Because that Principle is a bad man. He's the one who killed her parents." The girl's eyes faded a little and then flared up again. "He deserves to die. It's Mikan's mission to kill him."

"How come she hasn't killed him yet?" I asked.

"That's something that I don't really know... You can ask her, you know?"

"I doubt she'll tell me anything." I said. "She hasn't even told me that she has an Alice."

"Huh... well then you'll have to find out for yourself. If it was me, I would have killed that man ages ago. "Anyways... back to her life! Oh... sorry about this but this is also important! This was before she was sent to the E.R. This was during your first week with her."

"Hm?" I said as the scene blurred before me and then cleared up.

It was true... I remember that day. Only the later portion of the day. Mikan was by herself, and then I came by to take her to that mall inside of the hospital that was extremely huge.

Mikan was currently sitting in her bed and clutching a picture frame to her chest. Her face was red for some reason and she had a pained expression. Was she crying?

"Jicchan..." She choked, "Jicchan..."

The girl and I approached her and I tried to look at the picture. It was her grandpa. He was smiling.

"Was this her Grandpa's anniversary?" I looked at the girl and she nodded.

"He died of fever. He worked very hard... trying to support Mikan and himself, since Yuka died." She took a sharp breath.

"W-why... didn't she tell me?"

"She was trying to but... it hurt her very bad to mention it at all." The scene rolled on. Mikan stopped crying after a few minutes and slapped her cheeks as soon as she noticed I was coming soon. She washed her face and brushed her hair, got dressed. I wasn't watching of course. Because the girl gave me evil glares. When she was done, she practiced her smile until I entered the scene.

I must admit that it was a weird feeling looking at yourself. I still watched closely even as I smacked myself senselessly after many of my fails. It was completely obvious she was very sad. But the most obvious part was when she smacked my head, thinking that I had a fever. It made me smile a little because that meant she truly genuinely cared about my health and that also meant that she didn't want me to die...

"Wow... She had just met you and she didn't want you to die the same way her grandpa did." The girl read my thoughts. I looked down because I was ashamed.

The whole time, Mikan always wanted me to live.

And me? The whole time, I had the intention of killing her.

"Now you get it Natsume. The difference between you two is life and death. That she's more than what you already thought she was. You said you have to kill her? No Natsume. You are wrong...

You have a choice. You still do and you better chose wisely son because I know that whatever you think is right, is most definitely wrong."

I stepped back and covered my eyes.

"Don't cry... you still have time. Think it over and try to do your best. I will always stand by your side and protect you my child. You and Aoi. You think that you have to do everything to protect your sister but all you need to do is bring her out of the darkness."

"You..." I muttered sadly.

"Yes, it should be very obvious who I am now."

"Mom."

"Yes, Natsume?"

"Why did you come here today?"

"I came to tell you that you're stupid and that I expected more from you." A smirk came across her face. I knew that smirk was familiar. It looks just like mine.

"Yeah you too." That brought a frown to her face and I returned a smirk.

"Now you know... you have my looks and mixed personalities." She stuck out her tongue and I shook my head.

"You mean different personalities. Dad isn't anything like me."

"What are you talking about? He's stupid, just like you."

"You're stupid."

"Na-uh."

"I have to get going now," She growled. "and you're wasting my time. Don't you have anything better to say now that I'm here?"

"Bring me back a souvenir?"

"No... seriously." I gulped and looked away.

"Will you come back someday?"

"Natsume, I'm already dead."

"I know... but you came today."

"Yeah, I'll come visit you guys sometime." She grinned and gave me a thumbs up. She grabbed both my arms and pulled me along with her. "Don't worry my child, you've done enough already." She patted my head and I nodded.

"Thanks mom. For... everything."

"You're welcome. Now I'm going but keep what I said in mind. Oh and I haven't finished showing you the scenes. You can watch them on your own now." Then in a flash her whole being faded and her smile remained for a second.

I turned back and sat on the ground, bracing myself for the next ones. Mom didn't tell me what was the right thing to do so I have to decide for myself. Maybe the next scenes will help me?

It was now a scene with only Mikan and Ruka, alone. Practically this is eavesdropping but what this really didn't count did it?

"Mikan... I don't really trust that guy Natsume." When was this? Before the date between the three of us?

"How do you think he feels about you Ruka?" He shook his head and held one of her hands. I cringed at the sight of the two of them. "You can't just decide that someone's a bad person or that they've done bad things."

"What if he does something to you?"

"He hasn't done a single thing since the first day." He sighed and Mikan paused, "Although... he did kind of insult me on the first day."

"See!! I told you he's a bad guy!" he pointed to himself, "I was right."

"You don't understand Ruka! That meant that he can be trusted."

"Huh?" Ruka questioned. I leaned forward and cupped a hand behind one of my ears.

"You see... by being rude to me the first time. I was able to tell his true nature. He could no longer pretend to be someone else. He even tried to be formal with me but I brushed it off because even he knew he couldn't pretend any longer."

"So...! Can't he still pretend?!!"

"Yeah but he'll always acts like himself around me. He can be trusted. He may hold secrets but I don't care. All I know, is that the person I argued with, is the person I can fully trust."

"I don't get you." Ruka disagreed. I blushed at her comment and looked down on the ground.

"Well, sometimes I don't you too. But you have to know that this is how I feel about Natsume. He is someone I can trust."

"What about me?" Ruka wiggled his brows, "Can I, be trusted?"

"Um... it's obvious that you are since you already know everything about me and I know everything about you too."

"Or do you?" He whispered.

"What?" She asked.

"Nothing." He chuckled.

I was still flustered but I made it through all the scenes and all of them made me guiltier and guiltier.