I couldn't sleep at all last night. Thanks to Youichi of course, for telling me some of the most absurd things in the universe. I thought and thought all night, pondering(mostly disagreeing) whether I really... LOVED... the potato girl. I couldn't have... right?

Now, here I am, staring at my blank ceiling. I sigh over and over again and when I think of Mika- erm the potato girl, a smile threatens to invade my face. I smack myself just in time before that happens though. I have to keep myself together. My hand slaps my face and a thought comes to mind. Today is the day that Mikan and I get to go out. A smile forms on my lips and I jump up off my bed. Suddenly I find myself taking a long time choosing my clothes.

I head out in a hurry to arrive at the hospital. Just as I get there, Mikan is sitting with an open book; reading. I walk towards her and stop when I realize the blond come into view. Ruka. Ugh. I completely forgot that he's coming along with us today too. I frown.

"NATSUME!" Mikan cheers as soon as she sees me. I fake a smile.

"Hey Strawberry." I call out with an awkward laugh. "Ready to go out today?" a smile spreads across her face and it makes my heart flip. If that's really possible...

"Hey Natsume..." Ruka rubs the back of his neck uncomfortably and avoids my gaze. I roll my eyes at him.

"Hn..." I don't even bother to greet him. How can I be jealous of this jerk? He's nothing compared to me. I grab Mikan's hand and pull her out the entrance of the hospital. For once... her hand feels so warm and soft. I never even noticed before... "W-where would you like to go first?" I look away with a slight blush forming on my cheeks.

"Can we get something to eat? I'm starving." I look back to see her reaction and she looks perfectly fine. Not flustered like me. I find myself frowning again. Then I see her other hand is occupied by Ruka, again. I sigh.

"I know a place that you'll definitely like, Mikan." Ruka smirked at her and she nodded.

"Where-?"

"It's a surprise!"

Off we head in Ruka's direction. For a while, we walk until we reach this cafe. Through the window you can see decorative cakes and sweets. Girly... if you think about. I turn towards Mikan and she looks extremely excited. Her hazel eyes glow with desire.

"OH. MY. GOD! Tell me I'm not dreaming?!!!" She squealed as loud as her voice could muster. She was so happy that she let go of my hand to hold Ruka's with both of her own. I lift my hand up and stare at it blankly. "Thank you so much, Ruka? How could I ever repay you?" Her eyes gazed at him with admiration and respect. It made me unbearably sad. I could never make her this happy.

"Oh... it's nothing." He blushed hard as he glanced at their hands. "I know how much you like baking, so I thought, 'why not?'" He chuckled. I looked at the ground. What a guy, he is. Ugh, he disgusts me.

"Mm..." She smiled, then she went on her tip-toes. My eyes darken as her lips peck his cheek. My mind fails to function as I take everything in. Literally... my whole system fails to help me at the moment and I just stand there, counting atoms. "Hey... Natsume? Are you alright?" My mind snaps back into reality and I end staring into Mikan's hazel orbs.

"Uh... yeah. Let's go in. Shall we?" My lips twitch, when I form a fake smile.

"Table for two?" the waitress addresses Mikan and Ruka, completely forgetting me. My hands form fists and I end up glaring.

"Ah... actually for three." Mikan corrects her.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought.... well since you two look like a couple. Then... table for three?"

"Yes!" Mikan blushes beet red as the waitress leads us to a table. I sigh when I take my seat. The whole time, my eyes wonder anywhere but Mikan. I don't why but I feel...

Empty. Abandoned. Lonely.

I also came to realize... that I also feel

Jealous.

"I'm glad, you're enjoying yourself. I didn't think that you'd like this cafe that much." Ruka confessed. I practically mimicked him behind the menu. (Lol)

"Of course I love it. Ruka, I enjoy every place you take me. You know me so well." 'you know me so well.' I mouth.

"Grrr!" the sound escaped my lips. I slapped it shut, but it was too late...

"What's wrong, Natsume?" Mikan and Ruka stopped talking and looked at me with concern spread across their face.

"Sorry... I'm just having trouble deciding that I got frustrated. That's all!" I faked a smile. Her eyes widened.

"Really?! Me too!! I don't know what to have."

"Then would you like to share the hot fudge sundae with me?" Ruka smirked at the blushing Mikan.

"Na... I couldn't bother you to do that. I'll definitely eat it all, is that okay with you?" She teased but Ruka remained serious.

"I insist. It's fine... it's your birthday anyways." My mouth hung open in surprise. My eyes beam at the Mikan instantly.

"Today is your birthday?!" I frown at her, "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Yeah... sorry. I just didn't want to seem pushy. I couldn't find a way to tell you about it." After that, the table got silent and we ate in silence too. We all ordered individually and I? My eyes never looked up at either one of them. When we were finally done... Me and Ruka decided to take Mikan back to the hospital and she said goodbye with a smile on her face saying, "This was the best Birthday ever." I didn't respond because... this was really all because of Ruka. By the time Mikan left to her room, me and Ruka just stood there for a couple of minutes. No words spoken between us when he broke it all at once.

"Sorry about how cold I've acted towards you... I just had my suspicions. So... no hard feelings?" For the first time since I found out about Mikan's birth date, I looked at him in the eye. I was surprise by his sudden change in attitude. I went along with it.

"Yeah... no hard feelings." We shook on it but to be honest... Never had I felt so unsure about anything in my life, "Sorry for acting like I did too. I just felt a little..." The word couldn't come out of my mouth.

"Jealous? I did too." My eyes widened at him curiously. Why would he have to be jealous? Oh right... a guy like me hanging out with his girlfriend. I see...

"I understand." I nodded sadly.

"You do?" I stared at him with a blank expression. "It's that obvious then... I just hope Mikan hasn't found out yet." He chuckled lightly to himself. I just stood there like an idiot... What's with him? Somehow... the more he spoke, the more I got confused at his continuing banter.

"What do you mean?" I finally blurted out of pure frustration, "I understand that you're jealous since I'm hanging out with your girlfriend, am I right?" I finally confessed, but Ruka only paled at my response. His face turned into a weird and blank expression that I had to shake my hand in front of him. When he finally came through, he laughed out hysterically.

"Oh...man." he wiped a tear. I never really understood how people could laugh that hard. I never experienced that but anyways, "I apologize for making a huge misunderstanding out of this."

"Huh?" I glared at him, "What misunderstanding??" I just gave up with logic and everything with it. I basically threw sense out the window. "Please explain." I waved my hand motioning for him to continue.

"Mikan isn't my girlfriend. We're only childhood friends. I'm basically a brother to her." He frowned at the ground

"You guys aren't dating..." Again my mind cooperated slowly with no progress, "You... her... You're not her boyfriend? Then why... why were you so-"

"Flirtatious? That's because I love to tease her a bit." He smirked evilly which sent chills down my spine, "She's never seen me as a man."

"You guys acted like a couple today and I never felt... like such an outsider in my life. How do you explain that?"

"Dude... I haven't seen her in like forever! We were just catching up on things. Seriously you don't have to stab my wound!" Suddenly his eyes turned dark and his face had a hurt expression.

"What's wrong, man?" I poked his shoulder, "What do you mean I'm stabbing your wound?" From the look of his face, I decided to trust someone... just this time. Because the look on his face was real.

"I thought it was pretty obvious but..."

"Yeah?"

"I love Mikan and not as in family. I love her as a woman. That's why I was cold to you yesterday. I thought you made her cry but she's a worry-wort. I'm sorry for being such a jerk to you. I wanted to ask if we could start over." I nodded at him with a serious face. The whole day, my eyes threw daggers at him because I was jealous. But now that I get to know him... eh... he's not that bad in my opinion.

"Sure. We're cool now." I smirked, "Good luck with that love issue." I teased him as he frowned with deep blush on his face, "You blush a lot don't you?"

"Shut up!"

Today, I made my first official male friend and I didn't lie to them this time either. That night that I went to the Academy, I had slept soundly and peacefully. It's never happened before. But I had a dream about someone other than Aoi. It was Mikan. Although it was such a wonderful dream, I woke up drenched with sweat in the middle of the night.

This wasn't good... no... not at all.

I was getting too attached to Mikan and it had already been like three weeks.

Oh man... was I in trouble.