"say you won't let go."

— James Arthur

...

...

I published a chap before this. I'm publishing from 53 to 57.

...

I don't really know what happened or when it happened. I remember feeling very queasy and very light headed. I knew something was wrong with Christian.

I could feel it.

Ignoring everyone I ran out of the room and out of the house. I made sure that the gun stays in my hand. Nothing was making sense for me by then. There were dead bodies everywhere. The trees were burning up. It was a blood bath. Hell on Earth.

I started running. I kept running until I saw Matteo aiming a gun at Christian. He was yet going to take another loved one away from me.

I remember how I pulled up my gun and pulled the trigger but I was too late. Matteo himself had pulled the trigger and I watched the bullet go through Christian's chest. I watched him stumble back and into the water.

I tried to shout but nothing came out. I watched as Matteo fell to the ground with his brain matter all over him. Before I knew, I was moving towards Christian and jumped in the water.

Every fear. Every phobia evaporated because the biggest fear I've always had was losing Christian. The only good thing in my life.

I swam towards him so quickly and with such precision like I've been swimming my whole life. I saw his eyes dart towards me and his mouth stretch in a smile before his eyes closed. I immediately got a hold of his arms and dragged me up with such strength that I didn't even know I possessed.

When we were finally on the land I remember putting pressure on his wound while I cried like a maniac. I remember performing CPR on him and he coughed out the water he inhaled.

I remember someone pulling me back while I clutched onto Christian like my life depended on it. I remember seeing blood all over me. All over my hands. Legs. Clothes. It was everywhere.

"Victoria, we have to help him. Let go."

And I did.

Now at this moment I sitting in the car with Christian's head in my lap, while Rico drives us to the hospital. I don't know where anybody is. All I know is everything is okay but Christian not might be. At all.

The second we stop at the hospital Rico jumps out but I don't stop putting pressure on his wound. Paramedics with stretchers are with us in a second. They pull Christian away from me. I follow them like a magnet, not once letting Christian go away from my sight.

His golden skin looks so pale. So purple. I hate it. I want him to get better. To kiss me. To tell me he loves me.

Anything.

They wheel him to the operation theater but before I could go in, they stop me.

Rico holds me back but I struggle.

"I'm a doctor, they have to let me go in," I sob, clawing at Rico's hands.

"Tori, you're not in the right state of mind. Let them help Christian."

"I have to go in," I cry out while struggling in Rico's grip.

"Victoria, snap out of it. They are helping him!"

I turn around in Rico's grip and clutch onto him tightly while I break down in loud cries and wails. My legs no longer support me and I fall to ground taking Rico with me.

"Hush, Victoria. Everything will be alright."

"He can't die, Rico. He can't leave me," I cry out. "He can't."

"And he won't," his voice cracks. "Come on. Now stand up," he helps me up and makes me sit on the chair outside the theater.

"Rico. Everything is hurting," I clutch onto my chest. "Everything burns."

"Victoria..." His voice fades away.

I claw at my chest trying to breathe. Everything around me spins. My muscles harden and become stiff.

I'm having a panic attack.

"Baby, breathe." I hear a whisper right next to my ear.

"Christian...?" I choke out.

"Everything is fine, my love. Just breathe," I hear him again.

The sound of his soothing heartbeat greets my ears and I concentrate on it while I get my breathing to normal.

"Christian..."

"You're fine, Victoria. Just breathe," Rico comes into my view. "That's right. Just breathe. Everything will be fine."

"I'm tired Rico," I say as I slump against him.

"Then go to sleep, Victoria. Everything will be alright."

"I killed him Rico," I mutter as my eyes shut. "I shot Matteo."

"I know. It's fine. Now go to sleep," Rico instructs me.

I let go of everything and fall into a deep dark, dreamless slumber.

I hand strokes my cheek and instinctively I move closer to the hand.

"Christian?" I croak out with my eyes closed.

"It's Karla, honey."

I open my eyes and blink until my vision clears.

"Where's Christian?" I ask, hoping everything was a dream.

"Oh dear," she tears up and doesn't answer my question.

I frantically sit up and clutch her hand. "Please tell me he's alive. He's here with us right?"

"He's alive," she whispers out.

"I- I need do go see him. Now. Take me to him."

"I think you should rest Victoria," Karla pushes me back on the bed.

I somehow hop off the bed but lose my balance and fall to the ground.

"What is going on?" Lorenzo's voice booms through the room.

"L-Lorenzo," I sigh I'm relief as I stand up. "Where's Christian? I need to see him. Is he okay? Karla won't let me see him."

Lorenzo engulfs me in his arms. "He's alright. My boy is fighting. Don't worry, he'll make it through."

"He's awake?" I ask hopefully. "I want to see him. Please.".

"Victoria, listen to me very carefully," he holds me at arms length. "The bullet missed his heart by an inch. He lost a lot of blood. He made it through but he's in a coma."

Coma?

"What?" I look up at him fearfully. "But he'll wake up, right? I mean he has to."

"The doctors don't know anything yet honey. He'll wake up when he's ready."

"What do you mean when he's ready? He has to wake up. For me. For you. For Karla. For all of us. He has to," I cry out.

"Why don't you rest and we'll talk later?"

"What? No! I have to go see him," I stress. "Take me to him, right now."

"Okay. Fine, come on."

"Lorenzo..." Karla says in a warning tone.

"It's okay, honey." Lorenzo reassures her.

Why are they doing this?

I slip in my shoes and see that I'm changed and cleaned up. Christian's blood is no longer seen on me.

Lorenzo leads me through the hall into the ICU. The room gives me chills and not the good kind.

He's in the ICU.

The doctor meets us outside of the ICU.

He tells us that even though he's in a coma, he can hear us. We are not suppose to say anything that may affect his mental health.

He tells me specifically that he's better than he looks. His lung was damaged so they had to put him on a ventilator.

He's better than he looks.

He'll be good in no time.

He'll fight it through.

Just keep an an open mind.

Finally when I enter the room I done out why they were so hesitant to let me go in. He looks... dead.

If it wasn't for the beeping sound of his heartbeat and little rise and fall of his chest, I would've thought he's dead.

He so pale. His golden skin is a sickening yellow color. There is a pipe that goes in his mouth. The ventilator. His lips are yellow too. There is bandage wrapped around his chest. The bruises and wires on his body are just another thing.

I can't believe that's Christian.

I hold a hand to my mouth do muffle in my sob.

This can't be happening.

Lorenzo's arms wraps around my shoulder. He nudges me to go forward.

With shaky steps I make my way to him. I sit on the stool and tentatively cover his hand with my own.

"Hey, baby," I kiss his hand softly. "Please come back to me. I miss you."

He doesn't move. He doesn't reacts.

"Christian, I love you so much. I hope you love me enough to come back to me," I stand up and kiss his forehead letting my lips linger on his cold skin.

I don't know how long I sit there holding his hand but I know I'll never be the same after this.

...

...

*Sigh* I'm in love with this dude's personality.

Enjoy!!! Love you.