I took one long last room at my bedroom. This was the house that I grew up in my whole entire life, this house brought both good and bad memories.

I remember that on my sixteenth birthday, Drake drove all the way back from college just to celebrate it with me. That night he took me paint balling, it was one of the most memorable nights that I've ever had. I mean sure I got shot at least three dozen times, but I was just glad that he drove all the way back home just to visit me on my birthday. After that we had ordered pizza and watched my most favourite movie in the whole entire world. No it wasn't the notebook or even twilight. I made him sit through two whole hours of the LOL. I hated the American remake of that version, but I absolutely loved the French one. I've watched the French version of LOL at least a hundred times. I have this slight obsession with French movies. Even though Drake didn't understand a single word they were saying since his French was horrible, he'd still make me laugh with his ridiculous French accent he try to make.

I also remembered when I was seventeen and Chasity was sixteen, I decided for her sixteenth birthday I should her how to sneak out through out windows without getting caught. Sure it wasn't the most sisterly thing for me to do, but I only allowed her to sneak out if she had asked for my permission first in case I needed to cover for her. The first time I tried to show her how to climb out of my window, she got her mini skirt caught on a branch of a tree. She was so freaked out that she wouldn't let go of the tree. I eventually had to go downstairs and find a ladder for her.

Good old memories.

I was actually going to miss this place. My once beautifully decorated room was now empty as ever. I took most of my belongings, all that were left are my desk and bed. This room seemed a lot bigger without all of that junk that was lying on the floor. I better leave now before I missed my flight. Drake was going to come along to help me settle down, and to also visit grandma. I don't know how long it's going to before I ever return to this house since mom said she'd be spending Thanks Giving and Christmas at grandma's this year.

I carried the last of my things downstairs where Drake was already loading the things into the taxi. I handed him my duffle bag as he tossed that into the trunk of the car as well.

"Where's mom?" I asked my brother.

"Yea, about that. She had a last minute meeting at a city just an hour from here. She said that she'll call you tonight."

Of course, why wouldn't I be surprised? She was a workaholic. The only times that I would see her is at dinner, that is if Gavin was over. I ignored the idea and moved on to more serious matters.

☆ '•.¸.•' º ☆

I stepped into the nicely renovated condo that I would be living in for the next four years of my life. Of course I wouldn't be living alone, but my other two room mated wouldn't be moving in until the end of this month, pretty much meaning that I would have this place all to myself for the next one week.

"Hey Munchies, would it be cool if I postpone on the whole helping you get settled until tomorrow? Bryce, Carts, and Lynn are here on vacation, and I kind of told them I'd meet up with them. You know, just to catch up and stuff."

"Are you talking your friends from high school?" I tiredly questioned him as I started to open up some of the boxes with my bare hands.

"Yea them. You remember Bryson and Carter Grayson, they were step brothers. Then there's Aralynn Nguyen, the girl with the dog who tried to kill me. They used to hang at our house a lot."

"They were at our house like every single day, hard to not remember them. Is Aralynn and Carter still super close as they used to be?" I remember that most of them had all gone off to separate colleges, except for Carter and Aralynn who had both went Cornell with full rides.

"What are you talking about? We were all best friends, of course we were close. I'm sure they still talk to each other, you can't really throw six years of friendship down the drain just like that."

"You know what? Go have fun, you better leave before you're late."

"Are you sure? You haven't seemed like yourself lately." I gave him a weak nod right before he ran up towards me and gave me a hug before he left. It was going to take be about maybe four hours in order to unpack all of my stuff.

While I started to put some new covers over my bed queen size bed, I heard my phone ring.

"Hello?" I answered while trying to spread the sheets over the bed.

"How's the weather like in Toronto sweet heart? Did you have dinner yet, I just had dinner myself." My mother asked in a chirpy tone.

"The weather's nice mom. I'm just unpacking my stuff and once I'm done, I'll have dinner."

"That sounds nice. How was your trip? Sorry I wasn't able to say goodbye to you." She said. Since she brought up the topic, I couldn't help it but to ask.

"Mom why didn't you send me off today." I asked her quietly as I sat down on the bed, trying to relax for a bit.

"Didn't Drake tell you honey? I had this business meeting-"

"That's just it mom. It's always work. You always put work before me, and I don't understand why since it's not like we need the money. I hardly ever see you at home, and when you are its only because you decided to invite your boyfriend over for a family dinner. Your pretty much non-existent in my life sometimes. Sometimes I really feel alone mom." I hated how much this had bothered me.

"Don't you like the freedom that I give you? A lot of teenage kids your age would love the freedom your freedom that you have." She raised her tone a bit, I knew she was getting angry with me.

"Mom freedom is one thing, but this isn't freedom. Sometime I feel like I'm alone, abandon. Like you're not my mother but just a person who happens to live in the house with me." I knew I was being way to harsh, but I just didn't stop.

"Tessa, why can't you just be thankful and accept what you have? Lately your attitude has been a serious issue. Just because you're mad at the world doesn't mean you put it onto other people."

"I have to go mom." I said bitterly before I hung up on her. I felt streams of tears fall down my face as I quickly tried to wipe them away. For the past few weeks, I knew I was wrong, yet again I was right for feeling this way.

I was currently in a dark place right now. As much as I say that I'm over something and that I was strong, I just wouldn't do this. Every single battle that I fight, I don't get stronger, I get weaker.

I was just confused. My emotions and anger were playing mind games with me. For once in my life, I felt truly alone. I was walking down a path where I had to face obstacles that would make be stronger, except I didn't take it to my fullest advantage and it made me weaker instead. I pushed away a lot of people who cared for me. I led myself down this path. I blamed other people for my problems when I should have been blaming myself.

This was one of moment where I just sat down at the corner of the room just to talk to myself. Of all the people in the world, why can't I just be thankful. Maybe mom was right, I should be thankful. I have clothes, food, money, and a roof over my head. Yet, I wasn't happy. Instead I always dwell on the negatives. There's a million things to be thankful for, yet here I am thinking about all of the negative aspects in my life.

I wiped the tears onto the sleeves of my white shirt. I needed someone to talk to. I didn't want to bother drake or ruin his night. It was way too late to call Chasity since she had dance practice early in the morning tomorrow. So I dialed the one person who I knew would listen to me.

"Hello?" I person said in a raspy but husky tired tone.

"Hey Keaton." I barely managed to say.

"Tessa? It's one in the morning, shouldn't you be asleep? Is anything wrong? Of course something is wrong, why else would you call me at this time. I'll be right over." I could hear him from the other line getting up and out of bed.

"You don't have to come over Keaton. It would take you forever to drive to my house." I tried to lighten up the mood a bit, but my voice was so weak.

"Don't be silly. Your house is like fifteen minutes away, only seven if I drive as fast as I usually do."

A deep sigh had come out of me. "I don't live where I used to live anymore. I'm up in Canada now."

"Oh." The line went dead for a good minute or two. "So you really meant it when you said that you were going to go to university up in Canada. You know that I love you right? I'm sorry that I was a complete ass hole. I was drunk, drunk Keaton isn't so nice sometimes. Kaylenne retold me what happened at the party, even I think I'm an asshole. I know that I don't deserve you and-"

"Keaton. I know how you feel, it's just that I'm not mentally ready for all of this. I called you because I wanted to talk to someone."

"Oh. Can I just say something Tessa, why is it that I feel like the only time you want to talk to me is when you need me because no one else is there?"

"What?" I said in shock.

"I'm sorry that was stupid. Forget what I said. I was thinking about myself, this is your time, not mine. What did you want to talk about?" The awkward silence ended as I finally decided to speak up. "Well I started to have these thoughts on life. Everything just exploded when my mom decided that a business meeting was more important than me."

"I'm sure you will eventually have heart to forgive your mom. Sometimes people can't always be there for you." I thought talking to him would have made me felt better instead, I just uneasy in my stomach.

"You don't understand. She's my mother, this was important to me and she decided not to show up. She's never been to one single game where I used to cheer."

"Well you didn't show up to my final football game where we won championships. I mean you were my lucky kiss, but sometimes things are more important to others. Sometimes we have to compromise in other to make someone happy. I knew passing the exams with above a ninety-five percent average was important to you. Even though playing football is really important to you, I knew grades made you happy-"

"You know what? I'm sorry Keaton, I'm sorry that I wasted your time." I quickly hung up on him as my hands to begin to tremble. What if Keaton was right? Maybe I was being selfish to not only others, but also towards myself.

I hated myself so much right now.

My head was pounding, and my vision was all over the place. I took out the pain killers that I had in my bag. I knew I took way too many, but I just wanted to pain to go away.