《The Girl Who Was Abandoned》Painful Memories
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Sante helped Clara to get to the living room where they could calmly discuss what happened. He was a little overwhelmed. He had no idea today will be the day when he will meet his little sister again. After 17 years. She was a grown woman now and he barely recognized her at the first glance. But the longer he looked at him the more he saw the little girl that used to bother him a lot when they were living together.
Right now tears started streaming down her cheeks and he didn't know how to stop it. But he truly wanted to.
"Sorella" Sante started gently.
"Stop with sorella bullshit I haven't seen you for years!" she said, her voice choking with tears. She was staring at the fireplace crackling warmly, the flickering flames reflected in her glassy blue eyes. Sante's eyes were also blue but the hair color he inherited after their mother – it was dark brown shade.
"Father forbade me from contacting you" Sante tried to explain. "He can be difficult. Things have to always be his way. But I am very sorry I wasn't able to be there for you"
"It doesn't matter. I didn't need you anyway" she said and regretted it the moment she saw the pain in his eyes. "I am sorry, I shouldn't have said that"
Sante used the occasion that the maid was passing by the room "Mary, bring tea for us please. Unless you prefer something stronger?" the question he directed to Clara who shook her head wordlessly.
"Of course, signore" the maid responded and left the room quickly.
Meanwhile, Sante sat down next to her on the sofa and sighed. "It's okay. I understand your anger, believe me. I do. I was... am pissed off too. Because of everything that happened. I wasn't expecting to see you here today. What shit is our father trying to pull off this time?" Sante asked in a gloomy voice, then he thanked the maid for bringing the drinks and cookies.
"He wants me to get married," Clara said in a dead voice. She still couldn't believe it. She reached for the cookie, thankful the maid brought the food unprompted, and started nibbling on it to focus on something other than this sick situation. Meanwhile, Sante remained silent so Clara had to ask "You don't seem surprised, you knew it would happen"
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"Father allowed our mother to take you with her because he had no idea how to raise little girls so he believed you're better off without him-" Sante started speaking but Clara interrupted him.
"He was right" she grumped out. For most of her life, she spent feeling the heavy burden of what she understood was her father's rejection of her.
Sante continued speaking "Nevertheless... it's not the same as disowning you. He never did and as a daughter of our family head you have to be married to someone from another family like ours"
"So this is the value I have in his eyes?" Clara started speaking with bitterness. Tears appeared in her eyes again "You're not inviting girls to your secret boys' club, I can't take over the company or inherit the fortune so in my father's eyes I was useless till now. Until I could have been married off to someone"
"Clara, it's more complicated than that but I am not defending him. The way he's approaching things is wrong and you shouldn't be forced" Sante said, the pain was clear in his voice.
"So tell him that!" Clara yelled with frustration.
"Things don't work like that with father. I can't just tell him to change his mind"
"I am not ready for marriage for fuck's sake!" she stood up abruptly and started pacing around the room.
"Who you are supposed to marry?" he asked.
"Lorenzo Vincenti"
"Oh. That's not good. He's the second in command in the most powerful family in the city. Father will not want to miss that opportunity" Sante said regretfully. He wanted to help his sister but Lorenzo was the best match their family could get.
"So what, am I just a tool for some internal politics?" Clara asked bitterly. She stood up and started pacing through the living room in nervousness "I am not! I am a person damn it and I deserve to be treated like one!"
"Clara, we are treating you like a person, if you don't want this marriage there's someone you can talk to and convince him to back off – Lorenzo."
"Lorenzo?"
Sante nodded. "I know it's unfair to you but Lorenzo's one word will end this deal. So all you need to do is to convince him that this marriage won't be beneficial to him" Sante explained patiently. That he doesn't want to marry you.
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That made Clara stop in place. Okay, she could be pretty annoying if she wanted so naturally, she will make sure Lorenzo will break this engagement after their first meeting.
"Fine. I will do that. Thanks for the advice" the last sentence she said with difficulty.
"You're welcome" Sante responded, his blue eyes glinting with amusement. He stood up off the sofa and said "Nothing changed in your bedroom ever since you left so you can't sleep there today. I have a guest room prepared for you" with that being said he started walking accepting Clara to follow him but she didn't. He stopped and gave her a questioning look.
"I want to go home," she explained.
"This is your home, Sorella," he said.
No, it wasn't but she didn't want to argue.
"How long are you going to keep me hostage here?" Clara asked, resigned.
"Until tomorrow, buonanotte (goodnight)"
"Mommy, why is there a luggage on our porch?" Clara asked with the innocent curiosity of a child. "Have someone come to visit us?" Daddy had a lot of guests in the house but they would leave shortly after arriving no one was staying for more than a few hours. If she could she would ask them to stay longer and play with her but mommy forbade her from speaking to daddy's guests.
"No, honey. It's for us. Mary packed our bags because we are leaving" Mom explained, kneeling in front of Clara. Clara watched her mommy's green eyes and couldn't help but feel confused. Why is she sad? Holidays are awesome.
It was a little weird that Mary packed their bags because usually mom and Clara would do it themselves. Maybe that's why she's sad? But in Clara's opinion, it was very nice of Mary to do that for them, so she would make sure to bring back some sweets and share them with Mary after they come back from holiday.
"Where are we going? Is Sante going to join us?" Clara continued her questioning in an excited voice. She loved surprises and this trip was unexpected.
The last time Clara was on holiday she and Sante were building sandcastles. It was the best and now she thinks she would be able to build a bigger castle than Sante because she trained a lot on the playground. He won't know what hit him, that's right. Clara will show him.
"No, he's not going honey," mom said. Her voice was weird. Like if she was about to burst into tears any moment.
Clara noted that mom didn't tell her where they're going. Maybe it's the part of the surprise.
"What about father? Is he coming?" Clara was just making sure. Dad was never on holiday with them, he was always working but she wanted to know because maybe this time he changed his mind.
"No" mom responded, her voice was a little weird. As if hateful.
Clara raised up and turned the nightstand lamp on. She looked around the guest room. It was made in a modern style with a lot of gray and white. The bed was soft and comfortable, white bedsheets were big and fluffy. In other words, she had nothing to complain about in regard to the interior. And yet she couldn't sleep.
This house was full of painful memories.
Before she moved out her life here was easy, happy. After she and her mother left things started to get bleak. Mother was constantly struggling with money, while 7-year-old Clara without being explained a thing was trying to understand why she is no longer allowed to see her older brother, why is she living in an apartment that was the size of her room, where her father is. Of course, when she got a little older she understood that her parents divorced. Father kept Sante and mother took Clara with her.
She also understood why Sante was allowed to stay at the house. It was Sante after all who received all their father's attention so it wasn't that shocking to Clara that her father decided to choose him over her.
Clara knew there's no use in going back to sleep with having thoughts like that. Usually, during sleepless nights (or days ever since she started working at Himeros) she would just entertain herself with her computer but here she had nothing to entertain herself with.
She just realized that Lorenzo has not given her back her cellphone.
Fuck.
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