《When We Were Young [H.S.]》58. Butterflies
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The cold air of the backstage hallway made Wednesday shiver slightly. She could hear Harry's voice, muffled but still loud, booming through the air. A slither of nervous excitement made the hairs on her arm stand on end as she walked closer to the source of the noise.
She opened up another door, peeking down the hallway and hoping it would lead her to where she wanted to go. Though, she guessed she could use the sound of Harry's voice as a guide. Not even the tapping of her own boots against the hard floor could be heard over the mix of screaming fans and the bass of the sound system.
She reached the end, turning left and seeing a security guard.
"Which way into the arena, to the pit?" she asked, after showing him her backstage pass.
"Down the hallway, double doors at the end," he advised.
She followed his instructions, following the white walls as she got closer and closer to the source of the noise. Then, meeting the blue of the large double doors, she used her free hand to push it open. Immediately, the electricity of the arena greeted her.
Wednesday didn't know if her plan would work. But she was willing to give it a try.
She let her eyes cross over the crowd of the arena, shrouded in darkness but lit up by the various phone torches. People sang along as loud as they could, swaying where they stood, all eyes fastened onto the man they'd come to see on the stage to Wednesday's left.
Walking to the pit, she showed her pass to the security who let her enter in. Avoiding the mass of people screaming and singing along, she walked to the side, not too near the front but close enough that he could spot her.
She looked to Harry properly for the first time as he sang Only Angel, biting her lip when she realised just how good he looked. Not that he didn't always, but something about him performing so intently and passionately made her understand why girls in the crowd flashed him at every opportunity they could get. If he continued singing into the mic as suggestively as he was, she was sure she'd be joining them before long.
He stepped out onto the stage further, looking around at the faces of the people in the crowd. Nerves gripped her stomach at the prospect of him seeing her face, hoping he would enjoy the little surprise she'd planned. Only Sarah and Mitch knew about her showing up mid concert after she'd text them to say she was on her way and to keep it quiet from Harry.
Wednesday hoped the surprise would work and by some chance, he'd spot her in the crowd. Otherwise, she'd just flown to Copenhagen for pretty much nothing.
The song ended with a flash of lights and she watched as Harry walked back to the main stage. He began to talk to the crowd, his voice bouncing around the arena and making the screams of everyone around her ten times louder.
"I must say Copenhagen, you are looking beautiful tonight," he said, narrowing his eyes into the vast sea of lights and faces.
As he continued to speak, adjusting his guitar, Wednesday noticed Mitch's eyes looking through the pit. It didn't take long for him to spot her in the slightly illuminated section she was in and he smiled widely. She laughed as he waved at her, turning back towards Sarah and nodding his head in her direction.
After that, it was like a domino effect. Sarah narrowed her eyes in the direction he'd gestured too, until she also noticed her standing there and mouthed 'HI' with a cheesy grin. Then Adam spotted her, smiling and raising his hand to greet her. Before long, it seemed like everyone on stage was aware of her presence except the boy stood metres in front, obliviously talking to the crowd.
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She was almost glad she'd worn a white dress now, easily letting her be seen in the swarm of bodies. Like a white flag, raised high above the others.
It was pretty ironic, since she had all but surrendered herself entirely to Harry too.
Harry introduced the next song as the lights flashed pink, and the psychedelic opening to She began. Mitch dropped his attention from where Wednesday was stood back to playing guitar, the chords striking out into the arena. Clearly, it was a favourite. The cries from the people all around her were evidence of that.
Harry stepped towards the mic, narrowing his eyes into the bright lights that were placed onto him.
"Nine in the morning, the man drops his kids off at school. And he's thinking of you, like all of us do."
Wednesday sang along as Harry looked back to the band, Sarah raising her eyebrows at him. For a second, his face was hidden as he held onto the mic stand and looked back at her. But then she nodded her head in Wednesday's direction, urging him to look where she was indicating.
"Sends his assistant for coffee in the afternoon, around 1:32. Like he knows what to do."
As he sang, his eyes roamed around where Sarah said, his brows drawn together in concentration. Looking for whatever she'd gestured for him to look. Wednesday couldn't hide her smile, waiting anxiously for him to spot her.
And then, just as he opened his mouth to sing the next lyrics, his eyes locked onto her. A wide smile grew on his lips as his eyes lit up, the dimples in his cheeks pronounced. He tried to hide his happiness at seeing her there, shock painting his smile, but it was too late. The heads of people in the crowd began to turn to where he was smiling at, seeing her stood smiling back at him.
"She, she lives in daydreams with me. She's the first one that I see, and I don't know why, I don't know who she is."
Suddenly, Wednesday remembered the cardboard sign in her hand and held it up high above her head as his eyes continuously flicked to where she stood, unable to keep his attention away from her now that he knew she was there.
His smile deepened as he read the message on the sign, looking away back to the crowd in order to gain some kind of composure. She looked to Sarah, seeing her reading the sign and laughing, blowing a kiss to where she stood.
Wednesday had thought long and hard on the flight there about the best message to put. Though she desperately wanted it to be something dirty and suggestive enough to make him lose focus, she knew it was hardly the smartest choice. Nor was something cute and smushy—she would truthfully rather fling herself from the plane before ever stooping to that level of soppy.
Eventually, she found the perfect message that she knew would create equal amounts of entertainment and jealousy within him.
'I came for the pianist.'
The song continued as she kept the sign up, swaying along to the song. Harry breezed through the next verse and chorus, stealing glances at her every so often.
As he reached the bridge, a smirk appeared on his lips. Closing his eyes and holding onto the mic, he began to sing.
"Lives for the memory, a woman who's just in his head. And she sleeps in his bed, while he plays pretend. So pretend."
Harry's eyes flashed open and found hers as he began to sign the next chorus passionately, dancing in the way that he knew would evoke a reaction deep within her. The type that created a longing she wanted him to satisfy. His smirk didn't drop, enjoying the screams and the eyes on him as Mitch's guitar work echoed out.
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Narcissistic little shit. And she loved it.
Not long after, the final flashes of the lights signalled the end of the show. Harry left the stage to compete adoration from the crowd, the screams and cries almost louder than the final instrumentals as he said his thank you's and goodbyes one last time before walking off.
Wednesday made her way out of the pit once she knew the show was over, rushing off to avoid being flagged down. Finding her way back to the secret passage doors to backstage, security stepped aside to let her through. The mayhem of the arena blared through as she walked down the white hallway, anticipation growing in her bones at seeing him. Holding him.
They'd only been apart a week as Harry embarked on the European leg of the tour and yet, it had felt like the longest week of her life.
She passed through endless doors, getting closer to where she knew they would be. Until finally, she heard the voices of the staff backstage getting closer. Pushing open one final door, she looked up to see the band stood in the cold hallway, sweaty and full of adrenaline, having just stepped off stage.
Wednesday stood still as the door swung shut behind her. Harry's head turned to where she stood and instantly a smile of pure happiness grew on his lips. She'd barely had time to smooth down her hair and dress before he was striding over to her, walking as fast as his legs would carry him. His eyes didn't drop from hers once as she began to take small steps towards him, the sign still loosely hanging from her fingers.
Before she could even speak, he'd reached where she stood and wrapped his arms around her middle, lifting so that her feet left the ground, spinning her around in a hug. She laughed into her own arm as she gripped his neck, her cheeks hurting from smiling so hard as he kept their bodies flush against one another.
He was warm and the hair at the back of his neck was stuck down by beads of sweat, but she didn't care. All she cared about was how happy being in his arms made her. Like they were the key to unlock the joy within her.
"I thought you were meeting us in Amsterdam?" he asked, slowing down the spin and letting her feet touch the ground once more.
She shrugged and smiled, seeing his face up close for the first time, flushed and sweaty from the show. His eyes were so bright, she felt hypnotised looking into them.
"I wanted to surprise you," she replied.
He took a step towards her, sheer happiness painted across his features.
"Well, you definitely did just that."
Before she could register what was happening, his arm was around her waist as he pulled her towards him and connected his lips to hers. Her eyes instantly closed as her body melted into the kiss that was soft and urgent at the same time. She hadn't realised before just how much she'd missed the feeling of this. Kissing him.
When they were together, everything else just floated away. Melted into the surroundings.
That was until a chorus of cheers hit them. And Wednesday suddenly remembered that they weren't alone at all. Her eyes widened as she broke the kiss, looking to Harry with a nervous expression. But where she expected to see a similar panic, she only saw his goofy smile, full of affection and happiness as he looked back at her.
"I might have forgotten to tell you that the others found out about us," he explained quietly. "Blame Mitch."
Wednesday peeked out from around him, looking to the others as they stood clapping and cheering at the little display of affection they'd just given them.
"It's about time!" Adam bellowed, laughing as they all laughed.
Wednesday looked back to Harry, closing her eyes as she laughed and leant her forehead against his shoulder, groaning. The warmth in her cheeks only seemed to keep growing.
"Can't believe they all just saw us kiss," she said, feeling like a schoolgirl who'd just let her parents witness her first kiss.
"And they're going to have to see it for a second time too," he replied.
Before she could ask what he meant, he placed his finger under her chin and guided her face towards his, reconnecting their lips again.
They both smiled into it as the cheers came from down the hallway once again, their lips working slowly against one another despite the audience behind them. Wednesday felt like she'd stepped into a romcom, the way their friends were watching them kiss each other with proud expressions and how Harry was kissing her like he never wanted to forget how she tasted.
For the first time in her life, she felt like the girl who gets the boy.
She laughed against his lips as someone shouted, "Get a room!" at them, pulling away with an amused grin.
Harry leant his forehead onto hers, eyes flicking over her face like he wanted to never forget it.
"I missed you," he whispered, only for her to hear.
She leant forward, pecking another kiss to his lips that was shielded from the rest of them and smiled slightly.
"I missed you too."
A moment passed between them, silent and yet full of so much emotion it was palpable.
Wednesday eventually cleared her throat, stepping back as she looked around him to the band behind. Harry followed her lead, beginning to walk back to where they stood side by side.
"That was just heart-warming," Mitch observed with a grin as they walked towards them.
"You can thank yourself for that little show Mitch," Harry said, raising his eyebrows. "You and your inability to keep a secret."
"Well, it would be a crime to keep a couple as cute as you two under wraps," he replied sarcastically, his lips pulled up at his own humour.
It was swiftly removed as Sarah nudged him in the ribs, rolling her eyes. She smiled at Wednesday, looking down to the sign in her hand.
"Great sign by the way. Best one we've had at any show yet I reckon."
Wednesday pushed her hair over her shoulder, looking down to it proudly.
"I thought you might like it. Summed up everything I wanted to express." She lifted her hand with the sign, passing it over to her. "You can keep it as a token of my love for you."
Sarah clutched it to her chest dramatically, sighing.
"I'll cherish it forever."
"I think these two are actually the couple here," Mitch said, gesturing towards Sarah and Wednesday as Harry grinned.
"It's fine Mitch. You know you're the one I really want to be with anyway," Harry replied amusedly.
Mitch raised his eyebrows, looking over to Wednesday with a smug face as he moved towards Harry.
"Did you hear that? I'm the real love of Harry's life," he said, standing next to Harry as he placed his arm around his shoulders, grinning proudly.
"That's fine," Wednesday said, shrugging. She grabbed Sarah's free hand and they both stood grinning at the others. "Because Sarah's actually in a relationship with me. You're just her side bitch."
Laughs echoed down the hall as the others watched the back and forth like a game of tennis.
"Come on wifey, we've got some catching up to do," Sarah said to Wednesday, swinging their interlocked hands together as they shot one last smug look at the boys before turning and walking away down the hall.
"I'm really not sure now if you two are joking or not," Harry yelled from behind them.
"Guess you'll never know," Wednesday yelled back over her shoulder, grinning as they turned right and out of view of the rest of them.
"It's my favourite activity to wind those two up," Sarah hummed, grinning amusedly over at Wednesday once they were far enough away from them.
"I know. It's because it's just too easy," she replied, brushing past the backstage staff who were quickly working to get the equipment out of the venue.
As they walked down towards the back carpark where the buses were parked, Sarah squeezed her hand.
"So, how do you feel? About people starting to find out about you and Harry?"
Wednesday thought it over as she bit her cheek. There was no black or white answer. It didn't make her extremely happy or extremely nervous, but a combination of both. She was happy that they'd chosen to reveal it in their own time, slowly let more people in on whatever was happening between them as they continued to go from strength to strength.
"It's scary, but nice not to have to hide it from people anymore. Though, we still need to tell our families. That's the part that's making me most nervous to be honest," Wednesday said.
Sarah's brows drew together. "Why?"
"I don't know. I think because we've been friends for so long and our families are close, it's going to be such a big change for everyone. Plus, my mum already fawns over Harry and I know the second I tell her it will be non-stop of her asking me every question under the sun about us." Wednesday rolled her eyes. "I'm already tired thinking about it."
"Yeah, but that's what mums are for. To embarrass us in front of our other halves," Sarah replied.
They walked through the back doors into the underground car lot, hearing the commotion from the front of the venue.
"True. And my mum is an absolute expert at it," Wednesday smiled.
They loaded onto the bus, Wednesday's carry-on bag already placed onto Harry's bunk in waiting. They took a seat in the back-lounge area, Sarah fiddling with the air con. It didn't take long for the others to follow, loading on in a loud, energised flurry.
Harry, still in his performance outfit, took a seat next to Wednesday. His arm instinctively reached around her shoulders, unconsciously needing the closeness of her body near his. She smiled at how he didn't even seem to notice it as anything out of the ordinary. It was just a second nature to him now, to be close to her.
They watched as the others talked about the show, discussing their favourite moments as Wednesday listened. It was times like these, in amongst the chaos of the band, that she could pretend she'd never gone on a break at all. Act like she was still that girl from the first tour who was just enjoying the new adventure she'd taken.
But of course, she wasn't. In ways both negative and positive, she'd changed as a person. Experienced things that had broken her and strengthened her. Sometimes, she wondered if the 23-year-old in that first tour would be proud of the person she'd become. Of all the ways she'd handled everything life had decided to throw at her.
She liked to believe that girl would think the woman she was now was pretty fucking cool.
"Are you excited?" Harry whispered into her ear, pulling her from her daydream.
"About what?" she asked, blinking in confusion at him.
He smiled. "The next stop. We're going back to the place it all began for us."
She couldn't hold back the knowing smile that grew on her lips. Amsterdam. The city they'd first crossed the boundaries into something more, awakening feelings neither of them would come to give in to or admit until years later.
But it had been the catalyst. The spark that started the fire. And Wednesday wasn't sure if it would ever feel like just another city to them now.
"I'm excited to kiss you there, knowing I get to have all of you after it," she said quietly, avoiding his eyes.
It still made her nervous sometimes, to admit the parts of her that were buried deep within. To say exactly how she felt, when she was feeling it. It was still a work in progress, still something she was getting used to, but he made it easier. With every moment of truth, she found a piece of the defensive wall within her crumble away.
Harry brought his free hand to hers, squeezing it on top of her thigh. His face moved closer to hers as everyone else around them spoke loudly, engrossed in their own conversation.
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