He didnt expect his first appointment of the day to be with the youngest member of Blackpink.

It had taken a lot of persuasion on her part, but Lisa had remained steadfast and Yang Hyun-suk saw the stubborn resilience that he did not think hed ever see from the youngster.

That morning Lisa had walked into his office, quietly and looking every bit the tiny frightened mouse, but her eyes never left his the minute she opened her mouth. He found admiration in people who had enough gumption to face him as they spoke.

He had become accustomed to his employees shrinking back whenever he asked for something as simple as a financial report, so having Lisa sitting in front of him with a straight back, holding his gaze and waiting for an answer to her request for a leave of absence was oddly refreshing.

Something about her had changed, and it intrigued him.

Lisa had literally done the impossible and he had begrudgingly allowed her the 4 weeks leave she so desperately wanted; however, she had requested to leave immediately, and that didnt surprise him in the slightest.

He may be cold, but he wasnt blind, and unbeknownst to the wider company and general public, he had a heart.

He wasnt the dense uncaring CEO his idols thought him to be. He knew everything that going on behind the closed doors of his company.

He wasnt oblivious to not know what was happening with his girls and foreigner or not, despite their fandoms opinion about his treatment of Lisa, he was particularly fond of the rambunctious maknae.

Lisa reminded him of his younger self, when everything was seemingly perfect as he faced the world wearing rose tinted glasses. He quickly realised that not everything is forever and that it was ok to not be ok.

He stared back at the young woman in front of him with the quiet unwavering gaze, his eyes taking a glance at her wringing fingers. She was brave, he knew that, and it reminded him of the day she arrived at his company as a 14yr old trainee.

He was quick to sign her before another agency witnessed the burgeoning talent she held in her tiny waif like body. He remembers seeing the same burning passion in another of his favorite charges who hed always kept close much like a son; Kwon Ji-yong.

For him, Lisa was the female version of GD in that they were the only two idols he knew of that possessed that unattainable x-factor. The ability to be a Phoenix, to change themselves to adjust to any environment; including those that would otherwise make them uncomfortable.

GD had it as a child, as did Lisa and he saw it the minute he laid eyes on them both for the very first time. Their aura was overflowing with charismatic endearments, sweet and gentle off screen yet completely opposite in front of the lens.

Yang Hyun-suk looked at Lisa feigning indifference. He could see the resolve in her eyes beginning to waver and he knew that if she were going to back out it would be within the next minute or so, but he didnt want to see her failing in her own attempt to appear staunch.

Before Lisa could utter a word, he leaned forward, elbows resting on the wide expensive mahogany desk, lacing his fingers, his thin lips grimly set he spoke one word laced with authority.

"Ok."

The hardest request, and one that he was the most hesitant to agree upon was Lisa had asked for complete radio silence for the duration of her hiatus.

She did not want to have any form of contact with anyone from the company, including her members. She did agree however to stay in touch with Yang himself at least once a week and only via email.

He reluctantly agreed, but for the betterment of her health he had no choice but to say ok. He had his feelers out there so Lisa wont ever be in any real danger.

It was the only way she was going to get her leave, because the safety of her mental health was his utmost concern, above all else. Not some hormonally charged young man who played with her heart with his indecisiveness.

He knew everything, he was the almighty Yang Hyun-suk afterall.

As Lisa left, he could see the relief in her body which was evident in the way her shoulders were know visibly relaxed.

He'd always had a soft spot for the young woman for the spunk and tenacity she displayed in everything she did since the day he met her.

He knew very well that if push came to shove, BigHit were going to have a deeply sorry maknae in BTS.

No one had ever hurt Lisa, and it wasnt about to start anytime soon.

________________________________________

Lisa walked out of the YG building with a sense of relief.

She had so much to do before leaving unnoticed and she didnt want to risk seeing any gossip about Jungkook or IU. She had already shed enough tears and she didnt want to cry anymore.

She had cried herself to sleep far too many times and she couldnt take her mobile with her because on one too many occasions shed found herself at the edge of an emotional cliff, her fingers at the ready to dial his number just to hear his voice.

She had to try her best to avoid calling Jungkook, even if it means that she had made the ultimate decision to leave her phone behind.

There was no great need for her to contact anyone unless she found herself in an unfortunate predicament, but she knew the chance of that happening was next to slim.

She had never once put herself in danger, and her much needed hiatus was about healing not thrill seeking.

Lisa was going off the grid for a whole month, complete radio silence and she hoped that during that time she would return a stronger and a far more resilient woman with an equally stronger heart.

Loving someone like Jungkook was not easy, and had discovered that during their time apart, she had spent so much of herself loving him that she had inexplicably forgot to love herself just as equally.

Getting away from all the noise of being a kpop idol was just what she needed.

But first, she had to see him.

_________________________________________

Lisa surprised herself with how easy she found it to wrap her legs around Jungkooks waist, her bottom resting on the hardness of his thighs taking her breath away.

Her breath hitches as his strong calloused fingers gripped onto her hips holding her down, an arm weaving itself behind her lower back nudging her closer to his crotch, a breath which he readily and greedily swallows.

Lisa feels an unsure hand weaving itself under her top, moving slowly towards her soft mounds and hardened nipples, his slow exploration leaving trails of hot desire in its wake.

Her fingers move quickly gripping onto the muscles of his shoulders, afraid she was going to fall off the mountain of undeniable want that he was awakening within her body.

Heart beating erratically she reluctantly pulls away from his lips, forehead resting on his, her eyes remain closed as she wills herself to take deep breathes to calm her now frazzled nerves.

When she opens her eyes, she can see the telltale moisture of unshed tears on his lashes and her heart skips a beat.

Lisa had long known that for her, he was it. She knew deep down that forgiving him was a no brainer, but before she could commit to Jungkook again, she needed to put herself first.

"Hey, look at me."

She whispers as her hands move to cup his face, her thumbs spreading out to wipe the tears escaping his closed lids.

"Kookie please."

"I cant." he whispers

"Why?"

"Because I will have to look into your eyes and see all the pain, Ive caused you."

"And I dont think I can bear that."

"To know that it was all because of me and I hate myself for it Lisa, I really do." he cried.

Lisas heart hurt to hear how much he berated himself, but they needed to talk.

Before she left.

"We need to talk Kook, please."

"We have to do that much at least."

Removing his hands from her body, she holds them in hers and laces their fingers together encouraging him with a light squeeze.

When he opens his eyes, she sees the raw unhinged pain behind his doe shaped orbs, and it mirrors hers.

She tries to hold herself together for the both of them by biting her lower lip, but it doesnt work.

Her head drops as tears fall, the sight of their clasped hands turning into a blur that she cant control, and he loses it.

"Lisa, I am so sorry for hurting you."

"I am sorry I am not man enough to see what was infront of me." she hears him rush out.

Unable to hold back her pain any longer as she leans further away, their hands still laced.

"Im sorry for being blinded by something that wasnt really there to begin with."

"She was someone I admired artistically and I guess..."

The hallow feeling in her stomach intensified as she waited for him to continue. She could feel his eyes boring into the top of her downturned head. She was still too afraid to look up.

"I guess I was flattered that she noticed me."

"But baby it was nothing like what we have...I mean; had."

The last word leaving his mouth in a strangled whisper.

"I was blinded by the ideal of something, of someone that didnt exist."

"But what did exist, what was real; is you Lisa."

"It was you all along, and I fucked it up."

"I fucked it all up and I dont know what to do to make it all go away."

It all came back to her in one fast replay; him and IU flirtatiously chatting at the water front, the news paper article of Jungkook and IU kissing in a romantic restaurant setting.

The broken cell phone and the ensuing heart ache that was so bad she felt like she was dying, and she snapped.

It was then that she finally looked at him and his heart sank with his tears.

"Nothing Kook, you cant do anything to take the pain away because it was real and it hurt so much!"

"Right here?"

Lisa cries out, pulling a hand away from his firm hold to grasp it into a fist at her chest.

"It hurt right here and it was a pain I had never felt before!"

"Ever!"

He felt completely and utterly disgusted with himself listening to her voice it out in a heartbreaking cry.

"I loved you Jungkook, damn it I still love you now!"

"But...."

His mind quickly switched into overdrive when she said that.

"Everytime you spoke of her I died a little inside."

Lisa choked out and he saw first hand that the sparkle in her eyes were not gone but had dimmed and he knew, he fucking knew.

It was his fault.

Jungkook moved to take back her hand but she pulls her other hand out of his grasp. Their hands are no longer laced, and his heart turns cold with fear.

"Lisa..."

"Everytime I saw a video where you looked at her.. the way."

"..the way." She hiccups

"the way you looked at me.."

Unwrapping her legs from his waist Lisa moved away further from Jungkook to the opposite side of his room, her eyes looking dull and empty before turning away from him facing the door.

He became afraid that she was going to leave, and he would wakeup only to realise she was a figment of his imagination and pain, that she didnt and wouldnt speak to him again.

"You used to look at me like that Kook."

"That look was always only ever for me." She continued sadly.

"Baby I still do."

He said, moving towards her trying to feel her warmth again. If he could just get a little bit of her bodyheat he would know shes not a dream and they really are talking again.

With quiet pads he walked towards her, and he saw the sadness in the tenseness of her shoulders that were as she wept untethered and willed to invisible gods to please help him sooth their heartache.

"I still love you Jungkook, but I need time."

His heart leapt with the tiny bit of hope she had knowingly extended.

Lisas body tensed then shivered when she felt his strong arms encase themselves around her tiny waist, his breath hot on the curve of her neck below her ear when he replied.

"I love you too Lisa."

"I dont think I can live through another heartbreak Jungkook."

His arms tighten around her, hold her flush and secure to his hard body.

"I will never hurt you again baby. I promise."

Lisa felt his tears running down the front of her chest, seeping into the fabric of her top.

"Please dont, because this will be the only chance I give you." She said

"This will be the only chance I will give us Jungkook, please remember that."

He couldnt be any more happy than he was at that moment, but at the same time he could hear he hesitant tone in her words and he knew she meant it.

He knew it would take time, their relationship had already been through the wringer so a quick fix it solution for the complexity of their situation did not exist.

"I promise Lisa, thankyou."

With that final whisper of a warning, she turned to wrap an arm around his waist, the other reaching up to hug his back.

They stood quiet and still holding each other, his face tucked into the curve of her shoulder, her face pressed against the hardness of his chest. Lisa turned her head, her ear listening to the comforting steady beat of his heart.

Jungkooks body became attuned to hears and as much as he wanted to hold her for as long as shed let him, he was saddened when she moved. Hesitant to let go he allowed her a small space to move as she leant back to look at him.

Her eyes looked calmer and a lot more at peace than the storm that was slowly brewing in them before her outburst moments earlier.

He watched her eyes move down towards his lips, her lips mirroring the same pink as his, their bodies warming to the heat of each other.

"Baby.."

"Baby.."

They let out at the same time before their eyes met, the other watching as their eyes slowly closed in unison as their lips met again.

He could feel her soft plump lower lip pressing against his and his heart jumped with joy that they had made it this far, and that she was willing to kiss him.

That she wanted to kiss him just as much as he did her, and that gave him hope.

Lisas heart roared with butterflies when she feels his teeth biting her lower lip, his soft tongue running along the plump softness awakening a fire at the centre of her core between her legs.

"Open your mouth baby."

She hears him say damn near making her pass out at the obvious undertones want in his voice.

With that Lisa parts her lips and without missing a beat his mouth covers hers, swallowing her moans when his tongue enters her mouth, torturing her with a slow dance of his mouth and tongue, turning her legs into jelly.

The headiness of their passion consumes them both, however before her legs give way he moves with speed and his arms behind her knees and back to hold her as he lifts her and places her on his bed.

As he joins her side he was quick to reassure her.

"Baby, I just want to rest, nothing more."

"I havent had a good nights sleep sincewell..you know.."

"I know Kook, me either."

Lifting an arm she invites him into her, and smiling softly as he quickly plastered himself to her body, head resting on her arm as her other arm wove itself around his shoulders to hold him closer still to her chest.

They laid together, their arms entwined around each other, their hearts still healing and for now, they were feeling content.

Jungkook found himself falling into a peaceful abyss within minutes as Lisas embrace reassured his tortured mind.

Lisa on the other hand was grateful they made progress and talked. There was still much to talk about, but it was nothing that couldnt wait until she returned.

She was sure of it, and with that thought she pulled him closer, the lulling of his steady breathing and the way he had seemingly managed to wrap his arms and legs around her eased her into a calm sleep after she whispers sleepily in his ear.

"Please don't hurt me again."

__________________________________________

Jungkooks body slept but his mind was far from ease.

He was with IU walking away from her as she screamed after him.

She held Lisas bear in one hand and her other holding a pair of large scissors.

It seemed his dream was telling the unfortunate state Lisas bear had to withstand when he thought he'd simply misplaced it.

He turned to grab the soft toy only to see her turn and running from him, the maniacal expression on her face merciless as she took deep stabs to the bear, cutting the fabric as she laughed at him, mocking him at the fact that it was too late as white fluffy stuffing falls at his feet.

"IU!!!"

"No!" He shouted.

_________________________________________

It felt like a dream.

Her body pressed tightly against that of another, only, it was not just a random body.

The fresh aquatic aromas of his cologne invading her senses told her so, and then she remembered.

It was HIM.

But then she remembered what had woken her.

Lisa woke to his mumbled words as he tossed and turned beside her, his hands pulling her body closer to lay flush against his own.

"IU!!!"

"No!"

And there she laid, warm in his embrace as he mumbled loudly in his sleep, oblivious to the shards of her broken heart laying shattered around her.

It was HER again.

________________________________________

He felt numb.

It had been a week since she left.

A week since anyone had heard from her, not even her favorite oppa Yoongi had known, but that didnt stop him from not speaking a word to Jungkook.

Jungkook sat unmoving.

Two bottles of wine before him sat empty and cold as BTS beloved Armys furiously sent messages flooding the chat box concerned that Jungkook had been sitting deathly still for so long that they thought the live feed had frozen.

They watched with great sadness and concern as a weeping Jungkook silently drank himself into a stupor, his head hung low and bowed as tears landed in fat drops of clear salty liquid onto the table.

He was unaware, or did he care when Jimin swiftly walked into the room, apologising to the viewers before quickly shutting down the Vlive feed.

He stared with pity at their usually strong now broken and lost golden maknae.

"Hyungwhat did I do?"

"Nothing Kook, you didnt do anything wrong."

Rubbing the younger mans back, he was lost how to console Jungkook. Lisas members were just as surprised that she'd just left without letting anyone know.

"Where is she?..."

Jimin couldnt stop himself from tearing up when Jungkook lifted his head to look at him, his eyes pleading for Jimin to help him.

"I don't know Kook, I don't know."

Jungkook had little sleep since she left, the tell-tale signs evident in the dark circles under his eyes.

He barely ate, preferring instead to stay in his room, curtains closed blanketing him in a dark cloak all day every day. Many times, Jimin had found him sitting with his stuffed bear, mumbling incoherently to himself.

Jungkook was a shell of himself and if Lisa didnt return soon, it scared him to think what would happen to Jungkook.

_________________________________________

On the other side of the city he clicked on the email she'd sent the night before and President Yang smiled to himself.