Jungkook was laid out on the floor of the dance studio at BigHit HQ, his breath leaving his body in hot spurts as he fought to control his breathing. The others had long returned to their dorm for rest and sustenance, however he had stayed behind wanting to work on the intricate details of the footwork in the latest dance routine their choreographer had taught them.

Dancing was one of the few things he knew he was good at, and it was one thing he could control because if he missed a step or a turn at the wrong moment, he could potentially throw everyone off, that meant he had no one to blame but himself for messing up. So he wanted to have control of something he was good at, even if his private love life felt like it had been slapped with an enormous red pause button.

Bending his knees he sat up to look at the Honey coloured Bear sitting opposite him, unmoving and unjudging. He looked at his appearance in the mirror, taking in the way his normally clear skin had begun to show the tell tale signs of a stress related breakout. He had always taken care to cleanse his face every morning and night before bed, but lately he his normal skincare routine had been placed on the back burner.

He didn't have to worry about looking presentable for a certain someone anymore because that person, well she didn't want to have anything more to do with him, and it was now well over a week since his return to singledom and yet he didn't feel any urgency to make it known. He also knew that because of that kiss with IU, the rumour mills were rampant with gossip.

He felt his heart lurch as he thought about that night, because since the incident he had been having a terrible time of trying to remember what compelled him to kiss her. Other than an idol he had respected and admired for years was sitting across from him and looking absolutely eatheral; he really had no other valid reason to have kissed her, because the more he had thought about it, the more he realised that it could have been an infatuation rather than something more.

Unlike what still felt for Lisa.

Lisa.

Glancing to the mirror he looked at the empty space to his right. He missed the times Lisa would surprise him at the studio, often showing up in her training clothes ready to join him and dancing alongside of him with effortless movements and her face frozen in masked concentration only to break out in a small shy smile when her concentration broke and noticed him staring at her with something akin to wonder before rushing to pick her up and tossing her over his shoulders.

His eyes begin to pool as he remembers the elflike gaity to her laugher and the way she would squeal with delight as he placed her onto the floor attempting to plant kisses to her face as she pretended to escape his strong muscular arms.

When all the fun and laughter had died down she would place herself to his right and scoot as close as she could and take his left arm to place onto her lap and absently play with his fingers as she leant her head onto his shoulder, closing her eyes to quietly hum one of her favourite songs by Got7; Miracle and he had always had an appreciation for good songs and because of Lisa, he grew to like the song aswell.

Being with her like that, just the two of them, alone and together in their own time, their own space, their own world, he missed it all so much, and the pain he had caused Lisa left a huge well of a hole in his heart, the pain he felt hurt alot, but what he had done to Lisa, he knew Lisa better than anyone, and he knew she would have felt tenfold the pain he feels if not more.

Could he forgive himself for that?

Could Lisa?

He thought back to her words at the cafe when she had laid it out to him. It had taken something as cruel as Lisa breaking up for him to realise that he done the unimaginable to her that day;

"Every time you spoke of her my heart would die a little"

"but you never realised the pain I was going through having to sit quietly and listen to you talk about her"

"I...I don't think I can be with you Jungkook. I don't think I am what you need, I don't feel like your girlfriend I feel like a stand in, like a stocking filler, someone who is just there until that person you really want comes along and stands in front of you telling you she is ready, only to realise it's time to stand aside as the real couple get together. That is how I feel Jungkook, I am a filler in, the stand in but I deserve more than that."

He had without a doubt, in every sense of the word, fucked up royally.

He was not perfect and he would be the first to admit that, but what he continued to do after that day would have all but sealed the fate of his relationship with Lisa. She wanted him to sort out what it was he felt for IU, it wasn't permission to kiss IU but in a moment of weakness he did and the full repurcussions of his actions wasn't known until the following day and since then he had been wallowing in a one man pity party.

He wanted nothing more than to see her, to have her turn her beautiful doe eyes towards him and allow him to hold her, to feel her encased close to him. He wanted her to feel his heart beating only for her, and his love only for her, but what he wanted more than that was to kiss her into submission and tell her that he loved her and only her.

That it will only ever be her.

Jungkook wondered how can he do that when she cut him off. Bam was no help because the young Thai idol had also gone awol, and he understood why. If he were to be truthful he would prefer Bam to ignore him too and be there as one of Lisas many pillars of strength. Lisa needed good people around her and Jungkook knew that at that moment, he was definitely not one of those good folk.

Lisa the type of girl who deserved the world because she had a selfless heart. She took great care of her members as well as his especially knowing that his members weren't accomodating to many female idols. She seemed to have breezed right into their lives, made a place for herself within their tight group and seemingly had Yoongi at her beck and call.

No one ever had Yoongi where Lisa had him, not even RM could make him do half the things Lisa did, like the way his short statured hyung had no objections to sitting through several movies of her favourite Disney movies.

Lisa fit into his life much like the way ying and yang existed; in perfect harmony. Until he had to fuck it all up only the way he could.

As he sat looking at the Bear he could do little but reflect in the peace and quiet the silent studio allowed him. Dancing had always helped him clear his mind, to be able to see things alot more clearer than if he had spent days in bed wallowing in self pity, thinking about how much of a screw up he was and that maybe she was better off without him making her life miserable because that was how he felt.

Jungkook felt like a trainwreck and he hated feeling weak and lost, and if he could take it all back he would. He would take back all the hurt he inflicted on Lisa and he would use it as a lesson to what never do ever again. He hated the way his heart felt, sitting heavy and broken in his chest, aching with want to see Lisa, if she would just text him, let him know she was ok just to hear her voice or better yet, if she would let him see her just once, that was all he would need to feel alive again; to see her eyes looking at him.

"Just once." he whispers

Scooting forward he takes a hold of the stuffed bear and continues to rub it's tummy, his tears dissapearing into the fabric as he feels a warm arm wrap itself around his shoulders. The unwavering support of his members was the main reason he was able to maintain a semblance of normalcy in his broken state of mind, he didn't know what he would have done without them being so understanding and never blaming him although he knew in some way they did.

"Jungkook-sshi? Are you ok?" a soft feminine said beside him.

It wasn't the arms of one of his members.

It was her; IU.

For the first time, in his whole life his stomach dropped. Ever since he had first started to tell anyone who had ever asked him about his ideal type he was always eager to respond and speak her name.

Now it was different.

The butterflies were absent and in it's place the overwhelming feeling of dread took hold.

——————————————————————-

IU was beyond ecstatic after Jungkooks phone call. He too had received the news about their duet and he wanted to meet and run over a few things regarding their performance.

She was ecstatic that he had made the first move to return her call, but the feeling was merely a fleeting moment as she realised that his tone sounded a little tired and alot less enthusiastic. It lacked the quiet shyness that she had heard the several times they had spoken and he definitely didn't sound like the same person from their dinner. He was almost detached and businesslike and she didn't like it.

It was for this reason that she ignored the designated meetup time he had scheduled and made her way to Bighit. The staff were all abuzz upon seeing her enter their doors but they also knew of their performance, so she was more than grateful that she was able to breeze through security with little hassle.

With the help of their juniors who seemed to have also developed speech impediments, they escorted her to the dance studios where they left her as they continued to bow as they exited the hallway and into the waiting elevator.

IU had little trouble finding the studio where Jungkook was currently moving like a caged animal. She watched with hinged excitement as his muscular thighs continued to move around the room with stark jerking motions, his arms matching the movements perfectly building into a crescendo before gliding across the floor as the music faded away.

There he layed on his back, his breathing hitched and the sweat rolling off his forehead, his white teeshirt soaked with sweat stretched across his chest outlining the muscular chest that hid underneath the transparent fabric. The very spot where she found it hard to move her eyes to somewhere more decent.

Suddenly he sat up and looks at himself in the mirror, infront of him sat a stuffed teddy bear which she thought was a very odd object to be inside a dance studio. Reaching out a hand to open the door as quietly as she could to not disturb him, she stops as she witnesses the way he looks to the spot on the floor to his right, looking deep in thought and she wondered what he was looking at because there was nothing there, not even as he reached out to place his hand there.

It didn't occur to her what the significance of that small action meant until he grabbed hold of the stuffed toy and cries for something or rather someone and IU had a feeling who that someone was and she didn't like what she felt at that moment.

She didn't like loosing to anything or anyone and what she wanted, she always got. Everyone knew that and soon, if she was careful enough, Jungkook and Lisa would know that too. With clear intentions, she opens the door with as much silence as she could muster and glides towards him, carefully placing an arm around his hard muscular shoulders, and with all the charms she possessed she spoke in a soft whisper;

"Jungkook-sshi? Are you ok?"

The butterflies in her stomach takes off in erratic flight when he turns to look at her, his face registering a look a shock at her presence. She wasn't dumb to not know what that look meant, but that wasn't going to stop her. Rome wasn't built in one day, and she had all the time in the world to get her Rome.

——————————————————————-

Lisas members had just left the airport through the vip entrance and she had thanked her manager profusedly for having the foresight to book her a seat home to Thailand on an evening flight. She didn't have to worry about reporters or unwanted cameras being nosey and catching her unawares.

She had long yearned to return home to see her family and friends, she was well overdue for a visit and she was thankful that their CEO readily agreed to her leaving for a few days provided she return to South Korea before meeting her mysterious dance partner.

Lisa always returned to Korea feeling rejuvenated after every visit and she had always wanted to take a holiday with Jungkook in her homeland, to introduce him to her grandparents and wider family but she had never forced the idea on him because she thought they had forever to do so. But that wasn't the case.

She thought of him often, there wasn't a day that he didn't pop into her head for one reason or another, but everytime that happened she was cruelly reminded of why he was no longer around and that was main reason she was going home. She needed to be around normal people who did normal things like shopping without a camera in her face and rode bikes in the park without the burden of wearing a disguise.

Lisa wanted to find that normal again.

As the voice over the loudspeaker called her attention that the boarding gates were open and to proceed to the designated area she stood to pull her bucket hat lower and pulled her passport and boarding pass out of her CELINE tote bag as she approached checkin.

Making her way past security and pulling her bucket hat down further, she places the earpods Jisoo had gifted her into her ears as she made her way towards the gates. As people lined to enter she felt a slight nudge as someone bumped into her, but she doesn't pay much attention as she nodded absentmindedly noting a pair of Air Jordan Retro of the offending nudger. Sighing she increased the volume of the latest Tyga song she was listening to and moved forward, she couldn't wait to get onto the plane.

Keeping her head lowered she passes the flight attendants and with much anticipation Lisa quickly finds her seat. It had been a long day and an even longer week, and someone had nudged her in the cue, at that point she couldn't wait to land in Thailand and eat some of her favourite dishes in all their authentic goodness.

As she places her phone onto her lap to wear her seatbelt she becomes slightly annoyed to see the same pair of shoes of the owner who had all but nudged into her take the seat next to her. Perhaps she should have let her manager book her a seat in first class just as he suggested, but she wanted as little attention as possible and didn't mind sitting in economy so long as it was at the very back of the plane, she was ok with that.

As the captain and flight attendants made sure they were all secure and ready for take off Lisa kept her hat lowered as she settled into her seat, trying to get as comfortable as she could in an economy flight sized seat and drifted off to a quiet slumber to the husky melodic tones of Sam Kim.

They were well into their flight when Lisa awoke to a stiff neck, thinking she should have taken Rosies offer of borrowing her neck pillow because she remembered how uncomfortable the chairs could be. They didn't have the room and leg space or the privacy that first class seats offered, but there wasn't much she could do now.

Removing her earpods she listened for any movements on the plane, she needed to pee and she didn't want to alert anyone or fans of her being on the flight, it would become very uncomfortable for her and other passengers.

Unbuckling the seatbelt she moved forward intending to keep herhead lowered but the leg space was very small and she had no chance of making a quick dash to the bathroom without first asking the occupant next to her to move their legs. Deciding there was no way around it Lisa shifted the visor of her hat and prepared herself to ask the passenger to shuffle a little.

Lisa was shocked to find the owner of the shoes, the person who accidently nudged into her at the airport, the person who was now wearing the exact same expression of shock and surprise belonged to the leader of Got7. Infact all the members were all on the same flight, they were all sitting at the back, incognito all wearing hats and masks. What were they all doing on the same flight as her? Were they going on holiday or a video shoot she thought to herself. Whatever the case Lisa looked at it like another sign that this was an opportunity to hang with Bam again and perhaps become closer with his members.

Glancing back at JB, she couldn't believen that she was yet again thrust into the company of the man who appeared infront of her at her weakest, and now he was going to bare witness to her scurrying to the bathroom, but that didn't deter the tiny embers of warmth that was growing in her smile.

Lisa couldn't help but think that maybe miracles do happen.