(Present)

"Get out, asshole! Leave her alone –"

"Jennie –"

"What? He cheated on her! There's no reason for him to be here," Jennie shifted her frown from Jisoo back to Jungkook, who's standing at the door, staring ahead to Lisa. "You need to leave before anyone sees you here. She's already facing a lot of hate because of your shit,"

"Nini, let's go! They need to talk," Everyone turns to Jisoo, confused as to why the elder would allow Jungkook to be anywhere near them, especially Lisa.

"But –"

"I said let's go!" Jisoo's glare is not something they see often - and certainly not something they can argue with so Jennie just huffed her frustration and stomped out, followed by Chaeyoung.

"Jungkook, I'm warning you. This is the one and only time I'm gonna be on your side. You better fix whatever mess you're in right now cus after this, I won't be so nice anymore,"

"Unnie, don't –"

"Lili, you need to hear him out. Just cus I've been quiet this whole time, it doesn't mean that I don't know what's going on. Give him a chance to explain, then decide. Whatever you choose, I'll be right behind you,"

...

"Sunbaenim, keep your distance please," Lisa said coldly, stopping Jungkook from moving closer to her. "Whatever you have to say, you can say it from there."

"Lisa," He breathed. He missed her so much, it hurts him to finally able to see her again but at the same time, being treated like a stranger - again. "I'm sorry. For everything. What you heard, it wasn't like what you think,"

"Why would you care what I think? You've won your bet, you've got your girl back –"

"You're not a bet, Lisa. You were never one, not to me,"

Lisa smirked.

"I didn't know what I was feeling at the time. I might've fallen for you the moment you sat by my side at the stairs. Or maybe even before. I just didn't know how to go about it. We weren't friends. I don't know anything about you. But ever since you left me at that room by myself, I can't help but feel so much –"

"Stop. Please stop." Lisa breathed and looks down. Jungkook could see how tired she is and the sight is not easy to take in. "I remember you saying all these things to me before. It really doesn't matter anymore,"

"Yes it does. Please don't give up on me, not cus of that –"

"Cus I found out that I was a bet all long? What else do you want from me Jungkook? What - do you need to sleep with me too to win your bet?" Her voice reflected a sense of the utmost pain. "Am I really that stupid to you?"

"I'm the stupid one. I was stupid to not just ask Bam. I was scared to be teased by everyone that I ended up agreeing to that stupid bet – just to get your number! I just...I just wanted your phone number but instead of being honest about it, I covered everything up by pretending that it's for a bet! Please believe me, everything I've said – everything I felt about you is true...please believe me –"

"How can I? After everything – I trusted you! I loved you and then what – I'm just a fucking game? Well, you've won! Just –" Lisa suppressed her urge to cry out. Not here, not now. People might hear from outside. "Jungkook, just leave me alone. Just go, okay? I don't know what I ever did to you to deserve this, I'm just so tired, so please..." She sighed in resign. "I hold no grudges...and I don't hate you. Just go with your girlfriend and leave me alone. I won't say anything if that's what you're worried about,"

"She's not my girlfriend. You're my girlfriend,"

"Oh my God, Jungkook –"

"No! Jisoo asked you to listen to me so you listen to me and stop cutting me off!" He hissed, frustrated at how bad he is at explaining himself. He'd promised himself that he will do everything it takes to explain to her and he had memorized it before but now...now everything's a mess. Lisa fell silent at his tone.

"Again, it wasn't a bet to me. I just wanted your phone number. I forgot all about the fucking bet until I met up with Jae that night and it only came out when I told them that we're together! I wanted them to know about you - I was so happy to tell them about you. I didn't even realize that the 'bet story' would actually came out cus...cus I forgot about it – cus it never felt like anything remotely to that – and I just couldn't tell them otherwise," He sighed and looked down to the ground.

"I'm a man of many weaknesses, regardless of what people say or how you think of me – but if anything, you should know that the one that you've been seeing the whole time when we were together, that's the real me! I get shy around you, I get nervous and I do things or say things I don't mean. You're the first girl I've truly loved, I wanna share and do everything with you and I just hate myself when I couldn't even ask for your god-damned phone number honestly!" Jungkook blurted out with his palms closed in a fistat each sides.

"Yeri called me, crying that night. She needed to talk to someone so I went. She found out that her boyfriend cheated on her with a trainee and she was so upset, thinking that it's probably karma hitting her for what she did to me. She asked me to forgive her, and asked if we can go back to the way we were before and I told her no. I told her that I'm in love with you. I told her that she was right all along and I apologized to her. I'd been lying to her and myself the entire time we were together. I thought I loved her, but I didn't feel like I felt when I'm with you. She understood...eventually, and we part ways. That's all that happened that night, I swear,"

He opened his eyes to see Lisa's tear-stained face. Her cheeks are blotched pink. Her eyes glistened with the hurt he'd caused her. Her shoulders and chest heaves up and down with her sobs. Even in such fragility, she's beautiful. He wanted to run up to her and hold her close. Warily, he starts taking one step and another until he reached her.

"I'm sorry. For every single pain I've caused you. You don't deserve it," She closed her eyes and looks down. It's like a sharp knife had pierced into his heart. She can't even look at me...

"Baby," He braved himself and reached out to her cheeks, wiping the tears across her face. "I feel like I'm always making you cry," He sobbed. He really couldn't care anymore about crying in front of her. "Please...please don't cry anymore, I don't deserve it. I don't deserve you. You're so amazing and you deserve the world, not this. Not me," He takes a deep breath to clear his thoughts.

She had taught him a lot. She had made him feel a lot. They say if you love someone, you'll do anything to make them happy right? Even if it means letting them go?

...

"Lali," Jisoo rubs Lisa's back as the maknae calmed down after what felt like endless sobbing, telling her everything Jungkook had said earlier.

Lisa should feel relieved. It's finally over between them. Jungkook had kissed her forehead for the last time and wished her well, before promising to stay away from her for good. Everything will go to go back to how it was, before Jungkook had came into her life. Before the night at the stairs. Before she fell in love with him. But why does it still hurt?

"Are you okay?" There's something in Jisoo's tone that made Lisa turn to face her. When she didn't say anything more, Lisa brave herself a smile.

"I'll be okay, unnie. It's never meant to be anyway. First-loves are supposed to be shit right? So we learn and be better for the next one?" She forced a laugh and continue to wipe her face. "I mean, there's a lot of things happening when it shouldn't...and look - look how the fans hate us for being together – these are all signs right?" She looks back at Jisoo for some sort of assurance. The elder just smiled kindly.

She always took such good care of me - what have I done to deserve such blessings?

"Ugh, I feel like a mess! I'm never gonna fall in love again! I'll just live with my cats till I'm old," She forced a laugh before getting up and walking to the dresser. "I need to re-do my makeup. How long do we have?"

"Ten minutes,"

"I can do it in eight! Time me!" Lisa forced an aegyo to cheer up, in which Jisoo saw right through. As Lisa lightly powder her cheeks to cover the blotchiness, Jisoo walks up to her side.

"Lisa-ya," Lisa turned to her. "Some first loves are not necessarily meant to end. Not this way, at least. Not without a fight. I just hope you won't live your life being scared of what could've been. See...the thing about our lives as idols is that sometimes we forget that we're the hero of our own books. While everyone is expecting us to do things their way, we thought we lost our rights to write our own story. You've been keeping up with what everyone expects you to be for a while now, don't you think? Why don't you start to write your own? I'd like to read that book about you one day. I'm sure it'll be beautiful, however the story goes,"

Jisoo's words brought her to tears again. Only it's not the same heart-breaking sobs that she'd gotten used to. It's a refreshing kind - as if she's struck with a revelation and a way out of the long nightmare she'd been dealing with.

She's right...I shouldn't be scared to fall again...it's my life and only I get to decide what makes me happy. Am I not strong enough to do that? Jennie unnie said it once...that we are strong women. I can pull through - even if I need to dig my way out!

She smiled her first genuine smile in weeks. It's like a burden had been lifted off from her shoulders and now...now she felt free. Who knew that it only took a 'book' metaphor to bring back the life out of her??

It'll be a fresh start! I went through it and I survived. I'm gonna be better, work harder. I'll start communicating with unnies more, so I can hear their encouraging words more! I'll be fine...I'm already fine! There will be better days, and it starts now!

She recalled how she made the choice to be with Jungkook. All the misunderstanding - the confused and curious nights spent, thinking about him. How he kept surprising her at every turn and how patient he had been, despite her clueless behaviour and shy demeanor. Those actions had to count for something - game or not. Her tears and her joy had counted for something.

Indeed, he gave her the pain...but he also made her heart warm and happy with contentment she'd never felt before. It felt like such a long journey from there to here, but would she change any of it? No...she wouldn't. She fell for who she believed in. And she made some mistakes too. But nothing could take that love she felt - she knows it now.

The next one will be amazing...just look at how I loved him!

...

THE END.

...