《Like Oil and Water - Love and Hate at the Same Time》Like Oil and Water (6)
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“Sweetheart, don’t be hard on yourself, but have you ever taken time to think about the dynamics of a relationship between two people in love with each other? A successful one has everything reciprocated one way or another. The two people have each other’s backs; they are partners, they are a team, and they look out for one another in reassuring ways. It would be selfish of you to look at this only from your perspective. Reverse the roles and be in his shoes, if he told you he was scared about something that you had some authority over, you would say stuff to reassure him, and that’s just what he did.” Margie explained.
“That was deep. You sure you haven’t considered becoming a relationship counsellor?” Charlotte teased.
“I told her the same thing a couple of days ago.” Lorence added.
“Honey, fighting for equity and fairness for women, and liberating women from societal limitations caused by the patriarchal system is what we do, but you need to be able to identify the grey areas where nature is involved and let nature take its cause. No good and loving partner wants the other to go through any form of hurt, and they will do whatever they can to protect their partners from getting hurt; and it is a two-way thing like Margie said.” Charlotte explained.
“Wow! I think I have a partner should I consider running a relationship counsellor gig.” Margie teased.
“You women are just so wonderful. I wonder how I would have coped without you two. How can I ever pay you back for being so nice to me, even when I do stupid things?” Lorence said.
“Oh well, you can pay me by getting a bucket of ice cream, with some chicken wings.” Margie answered.
“If you want to pay me, just make sure I do not miss my free trip to Scotland. Thank you.” Charlotte answered.
“You were not planning to cancel the trip, were you?” Margie asked, one eyebrow raised higher than the other.
“With both of you? I wouldn’t dare it. You won’t forgive me for life if I did.” Lorence answered.
“Glad you know that. Now do the needful. Give Jaden a call and apologize.” Charlotte said.
“I thought you didn’t like him.” Lorence added.
“Did I say that? I may have misjudged him. He has cute friends.” Charlotte answered.
“Talking about his friends, what was going on between you and that cute guy? I think I may have forgotten his name” Margie said.
“Mark? We were connecting, and that’s why Lorence cannot afford to have that trip canceled, or I will take it as an act of war.” Charlotte teased.
Lorence stepped away from her friends so she could put a call through to Jaden; she was not sure how she was going to apologize, but she knew it had to be done, because she stepped out of line when she reacted angrily. “I hope he understands that I am prone to behaving that way sometimes.” she thought to herself. She wondered how she would have reacted if the roles were reversed.
“Hey babe.” Jaden answered at the first ring, and Lorence was not quite sure whether it was the tone of his voice or the guilt from her actions, but she felt terrible about her reaction.
“Hey, I’m sorry for saying what I said, and for reacting the way I did. I know I can’t take back the things I said, but I really am sorry, and I don’t want to give excuses for my attitude.” Lorence said.
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“It’s fine. I understand. I may have come off as wanting control, but I feel like two people in a relationship are supposed to look out for each other. While I respect your stance about women not being weak, society has not made it safe for women either, and so some of us have the responsibility of contributing to the protection of women from social conditioning.” Jaden explained. Lorence thought about what he said, and even though she saw that he was right in a way, she wanted to counter what he said for the purpose of clarity, but thought better of it.
“Thank you for making efforts to understand me. I’m sorry if I go off sometimes, because I’m still trying to get used to the fact that I’m in a relationship, and I am learning that there are relationship dynamics that I really need to pay attention to if this is going to work.” Lorence added.
“So is the trip still on, or have you changed your mind?” Jaden asked.
“Even if I wanted to change my mind, the thoughts of my friends not forgiving forever is something I can’t deal with.” Lorence said.
Jaden loved the fact that Lorence called him to apologize, and he felt at ease knowing that she was not cancelling the trip. As he pondered on the relationship from when they started to where they had gotten to, he wondered what the future would be like for the two of them; he wondered whether there would be more misunderstandings to resolve, and if the misunderstandings would be based on gender roles and societal misconceptions. His mind wandered to the moment when they would get married, because he hoped that they would spend the rest of their lives together, and he smiled at the thoughts of them as parents raising children. He wondered what life as parents would be like for both of them, more importantly what values they would raise their children by, and the more he thought about it, the more his desire to start a family with Lorence. “That’s the whole point of being in a relationship like this one, but are we moving too fast or too slow?” He asked himself.
Everyone looked forward to the trip to Scotland, well except for Lorence who did not really share in the excitement; she still had her reservations about meeting Jaden’s family, because she was not ready for the pressure and expectations that could come from the meeting. Lorence had never really talked to Jaden about the future, and so both of them had no idea what they expected from each other in their future as partners.
All other persons involved in the trip to Scotland were excited about it; for Jaden’s friends, they looked forward to having Lorence’s friends in their midst, and for Lorence’s friends, they loved the idea of traveling to a different continent without bothering about travel costs and hotel bills. It was like the perfect getaway for them and they did not want to miss it for anything. Even though her friends were excited about the trip, they were also concerned about Lorence, because she did not show any signs that she wanted the trip.
“Everything will turn out fine. You really do not have to worry” Charlotte assured.
“What’s there to worry about when you have your squad going with you?” Margie asked.
“That’s right. You have us there, so you need to relax, breathe and live in the moment.” Charlotte added.
“What’s the worst that could happen? Whatever it is, we’ve got you, and can jet out of the place on the next available flight.” Margie added.
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“Not without first showing them the Charlie’s Angels in us though.” Charlotte said.
“Oh! That’s right.” Margie added.
“Thanks girls. I can’t believe my mind totally blanked out the fact that you will be there with me.” Lorence said, feeling some relief at the realization that she was traveling with her friends.
“Give your mind a break, you’re allowing it to process too many things at the same time. At this point, just go with the flow, live in the moment, create beautiful memories with every opportunity you have, and enjoy yourself as much as you can.” Margie added.
“Margie with the words of wisdom etched in marble.” Charlotte said.
“I wonder where it all comes from. It’s so easy for her to say something soothing to anyone in any situation. Lorence added.
“Oh well, I know what pain feels like, and I have survived different types of pain. So it’s easy for me to understand people’s pains.” Margie answered.
“When we get back from this trip, I’m so paying someone to create a website for you, we need to monetize your gifts.” Charlotte added.
“Perhaps I should consider that option.” Margie said.
“About the trip, Scottish men are the ones that wear skirts, yeah?” Charlotte asked.
“Charlotte, it’s called a kilt, and it is a traditional wear.” Lorence answered.
“Okay, that should be fun to see. I would also love to hear the Scottish brogues, I hear non-speakers of the brogue can barely understand what they say.” Margie added.
“Hey Lorence, ever heard Jaden speak with the Scottish brogues?” Charlotte asked.
“I had no idea he was Scottish. I always thought he was American though.” Lorence answered.
“Did you know about the dukedom stuff?” Margie asked.
“I think he mentioned it, but I did not pay attention.” Lorence answered.
“So chances are that you could become a duchess in the near future. Now that’s awesome. We are friends to the duchess, her majesty duchess Lorence.” Charlotte teased with courtesy.
“I don’t know if that’s how it works though, but I’m not about to spoil your fantasy.” Lorence answered.
“I see why he has that confidence.” Margie added.
“There’s no way I’ll be that rich, and not be that confident. Wealth is a confidence booster. That’s why our friend, the good ol’ Lorence, is so confident, even though she prefers to be humble and modest.” Charlotte said.
“Well, I don’t believe my parents’ wealth is mine, and I don’t feel entitled, that’s why I would gladly prefer to remain humble and modest.” Lorence said.
“Does he know about your wealthy background?” Margie asked.
“Not really. Why?” Lorence answered.
“Conflict of confidence if there’s anything like that.” Charlotte said.
“What does that even mean?” Lorence asked.
“I think Margie would be able to explain better.” Charlotte answered.
“Me? Why me? I didn’t say it, you did. So explain to us what you mean by conflict of confidence.” Margie said.
“Well, Jaden and Lorence have wealthy backgrounds, and their backgrounds have a role to play in their confidence, and so a lot of the arguments may be from a position of each one being confident enough to want to defend their views, opinions, and ideologies.” Charlotte explained.
“You may have a valid point there.” Margie added.
“I did not think about it that way though, but maybe you are right. I think you may be on to something.” Lorence said.
“Oh thank you! Margie, do you still need a partner for when you open your counselling office, I think I may have the gift too.” Charlotte teased, and the ladies laughed.
Knowing that her friends were coming with her on the trip to Scotland made Lorence glad, and she tried not to worry about meeting Jaden’s family. She repeatedly told herself that she was going to live in the moment and not be fixated on what could be. “The family could turn out to be very nice people though. Why do you think something will go wrong?” She asked herself, and wondered whether it was only because she was afraid that they were going too fast, “But are we going too fast?” she asked herself. After thinking about the relationship and how far they had come, she concluded that they were moving at a steady pace, even if they still had a lot to learn about each other.
Lorence just
Before the accident, Lorence had planned her life and expectations, and getting in a relationship was not on the list of things she wanted. All she wanted was to dedicate all her life and everything she had to the liberation of women from the unfair treatment they got as a result of conforming to the dictates and demands of a patriarchal system. She wondered why people that said they loved humans could not see that women were treated like they were lesser humans, yet they saddled them with so many responsibilities
She heard so many stories from the elderly women she took care of, and sometimes those stories of their experiences made her want to take feminism to the extreme, because she could not fathom why men would freely treat women in really terrible ways, and go free.
After her last break up, she concluded that there was no man that could fill the void that her ex had left, and after being in a dark place mentally, emotionally, and physically as a result of the break up, she resolved within herself that she was never going to allow herself go through the torture of that kind of heartbreak. She felt that not getting into a serious relationship was the best way to avoid the pain that could follow a breakup, and her life was just going according to what she had planned out before the accident.
The accident had made her rethink her life, because it made her realize you can make all the plans in the world, but events of the next second can change those plans, and thus tow a different path other than was originally intended.
Being in a relationship with Jaden had made her realize that there were some parts of companionship that she could not get from Margie and Charlotte, and there were no doubts about the fact that she loved what was happening between her and Jaden; the only things that bothered her were uncertainty about the future, and the fact that she felt that she had left her vulnerability unattended to.
Lorence so desperately wanted to live in the moment and enjoy every bit of it, but her mind always had a way of wandering and making her feel uncomfortable about the relationship, especially as she was not sure whether her feet were firmly planted in the relationship or not. While she was ready to do all she could to keep the relationship, she still felt that there were so many things about Jaden that she did not know about, and so it was difficult to know where to draw boundaries whenever they had discussions about ideologies and views. One thing she was certain about was the fact that Jaden still had the tendency to try to control whatever happened in the relationship, including her; she could sense the alpha male attitude in him from a mile away, no matter how cleverly he tried to hide it. She was not ready to be a man’s robot that could lead to the very same slavery that she was trying to liberate women from, and she was also not ready to be dependent on a man for whatever reasons.
One of the inner battles Lorence had to deal with constantly was knowing when and where to be firm about her views without being overbearing and making it seem like she was forcing anyone to accept her views. She believed that two people could coexist peaceably without accepting each other’s views, but she had come to realize that the world was not wired that way, “The world would be a better place if people just accepted that humans were equal, and that they were entitled to seeing the world from different perspectives without forcing each other to accept views that they did not agree to.” she thought to herself.
Jaden made the necessary preparations for the trip to his family home in Scotland, and he let his family know that he was coming with more people so that they could also make arrangements and prepare for a fuller house than before. However, he left out the information about coming with his girlfriend, because he knew Lorence was not comfortable about meeting his family, and he did not want to put her in an awkward situation where there would be some sort of pressure from his family, and he was also not ready to deal with his family’s questions about settling down.
While he thought he knew Jaden to some extent, he was very certain that there were questions he could get asked about her that he had no idea what the answers were. For instance, he wondered why she hardly talked about her family, and he could not remember any conversation where she talked about her family. He had refused to ask because he felt she was deliberately holding back that information because it could trigger memories that she did not want to remember. He did not like the fact that he could make her see life through his mind sometimes, but accepted that it was all a process of unlearning old things and learning new things.
As planned, the day to leave the U.S. came and they all met at the airport before being taken to a private hangar where Jaden’s aircraft was waiting for them.
“Wow! That’s a beauty.” Margie said when she saw the aircraft.
“What’s her name?” Charlotte asked.
“Spirit of the skies.” Brian answered.
“Oh! Okay.” Margie added.
“He’s kidding. I haven’t given it a name, yet.” Jaden said as he held Lorence’s hand to help her up the stairway.
“Why didn’t you give it a name though?” Lorence asked.
“I don’t know, maybe I was waiting for the right name to come.” Jaden answered with a smile.
“Oh! Fair enough. I hope you give it a sweet name when you do.” Lorence added.
Few minutes later, they were strapped in and filled with smiles and giggles as the aircraft taxied to the runway, and began its takeoff run before lifting off.
“How many minutes more before we get to Scotland?” Charlotte asked as the aircraft began its cruise.
“Well, about 6 or 7 hours more.” Mark answered as he helped himself to a bottle of wine from the cabin attendant’s trolley.
“He’s joking, right?” Charlotte asked.
“No, he’s right.” Margie asked, pointing at a screen that showed the flight path and estimated time of arrival.
“Wow! Let’s make it count then. Can we play games or something?” Charlotte asked.
Jaden and Lorence sat together, but away from the others. They were silent for a while as they listened to the chatter from their friends, and their voices seemed to have a soothing effect on both Jaden and Lorence. Jaden was glad that the ladies had agreed to come on the trip with them, because he wondered what it would have been like if Lorence was the only woman in their midst.
“Hey Babe.” Lorence said to Jaden, and she loved how his face lit up with a smile as he looked at her.
“I love when you call me that way. It makes me feel loved.” Jaden whispered. The statement seemed to touch a spot in Lorence’s heart, as she had never paid attention to whether he was feeling loved by her or not.
“What’s your family like?” Lorence asked, as she put her head on his shoulder.
“Let it go. They are cool people, I will take care of your concerns.” Jaden said in a tone that indicated he did not like the conversation.
“Oh okay.” Lorence said, not liking his tone, but not wanting to push it. She knew he was a proud man who was learning not to allow his ego overrule his sense of reasoning, but she could not help but feel upset sometimes, when he treated her like a child that did not have a say in matters that concerned her.
They had lighthearted conversations as the flight made its way enroute Scotland, and at some point they joined the others as they played games. It was a smooth flight, and one filled with so much fun. It felt like they had been friends for a very long time, and Jaden loved the chemistry between his friends and Lorence’s friends.
Jaden was still unable to figure out what Mark was up to, because in contrast to his usual impulsive and annoying attitude, he was putting up a good show of being the perfect gentleman, a trait that Jaden had never seen before.
After several hours of being airborne, the pilot made the announcement about their present location and that they were two minutes away from their destination, and interestingly, the friends were still bubbling with energy.
“Do you speak the Scottish brogues?” Margie asked as the aircraft taxied to a stop.
“Och, aye ah dae. Ah speak it sae weel.” Jaden answered with a Scottish highland accent.
“What did he say?” What did you just say?” Margie asked.
“I have no idea.” Charlotte answered.
“I wouldn’t bother my head if I were you.” Brian added.
“It’s fer easy. Ah kin teach ye if yi’ll waant.” Jaden said with a smile.
“I think I heard- easy and teach in that. Thank you, but no thanks.” Lorence said with a giggle.
“We gave up a long time ago. One minute you think you know it, the next minute you’re staring into space because you have no idea what the person talking to you is saying.” Jimmy added.
“You seem like the quiet one.” Margie said to Jimmy as they made their way to a black custom-made bus waiting to transport them.
“Most times, I just want to observe people first before getting social with them.” Jimmy answered.
“Welcome to Scotland guys. I’m pretty sure you will love it here.” Jaden announced as they pulled out of the airport.
“Can you say what you just said in Scottish brogues?” Margie asked.
“Oh sure. Failte tae Scootlund guys. A’m bonny sure ye’ll loue it ‘ere.” Jaden answered.
“Wow! I could only make out -guys and sure-, but I love the accent.” Margie added.
“Yeah! I love the Irish accent too. They are so unique.” Charlotte added.
Lorence was not quite sure how she felt; a part of her wished she wouldn’t have to meet Jaden’s family, and another part of her wanted to forget everything else like her friends were doing. “How is it so easy for them? Maybe because I always overthink everything. I really should stop overthinking things, and just live in the moment.” Lorence thought to herself.
“A penny fur yer thoughts mah lassie.” Jaden said to Lorence.
“Wait! Let me figure that out.” Lorence said.
“Please do.” Jaden said with a smile.
“A penny for your thoughts, I can’t make out the rest.” Lorence said.
“Brilliant! You’re correct, the other part -mah lassie- is my lady.” Jaden added excitedly.
As the bus meandered its way through different streets and highways, Jaden became more excited. He had not seen his family in a year, and the visits always had a positive effect on him, but this time he was more excited because he came with more people, especially Lorence. He daydreamed about the fun activities they would do together, and how their closeness would strengthen their bond. He wanted to make sure it was the perfect getaway experience for everyone, and he made special arrangements for that.
“This place is beautiful.” Lorence said as she looked out the window.
“You haven’t seen anything yet. If you love a picturesque landscape, you are about to be blown away.” Jaden answered excitedly.
They got to the family home, and they were indeed blown away, because it was a magnificent castle against a backdrop of mountains and lush green plants. The castle came from a long line of dukes; it was handed down through generations, and they ensured that they maintained it well.
There was always a nostalgic feeling for Jaden whenever he visited, as memories of his childhood kept flashing. He remembered the beautiful times he spent with his grandfather, and how he taught him so many things that helped shape him into the man he had grown to become. He also remembered the balls that both his father and grandfather threw, and how he was always running through the halls in excitement. “Those were really beautiful times,” he mused.
“Wow!” Margie exclaimed.
“I thought beautiful places like this only existed in movies, you know those epic movies about medieval times.” Charlotte added.
“You have no idea what you are about to see inside.” Mark said excitedly.
“Don’t spoil the fun and surprise Mark.” Brian added.
“I just thought to give them fair warning, so they don’t gasp all the air away.” Mark answered. “That’s the typical Mark that we know.” Jaden thought to himself as he stole a quick glance at Mark and the other guys.
Jaden introduced Lorence to his family as his good friend, and even though she felt relief that he introduced her that way, some part of her would have preferred he introduced her as his girlfriend. She was also certain that he only introduced her that way because he just wanted to make her feel comfortable, and not because that was what he wanted. One thing she knew about Jaden was that he was proud of whatever he had, and she knew that he would have loved to introduce her as his girlfriend, but she felt like she had stolen the moment from him, and she did not really like it that way.
Jaden and Lorence’s friends could barely hide their shock when they heard Jaden introduce Lorence as his friends, but they pretended to recover quickly from the shock and followed the script that Jaden had written. However, like clockwork the attitude of Charlotte and Margie changed towards Jaden and his friends, and Lorence sensed it from the way they responded to them when asked if they would be interested in a tour around the property.
“No.” Margie answered, as the three ladies were shown their rooms.
“What was that about? Was there a fight that we did not know about?” Charlotte asked when the three of them converged in Lorence’s room.
“A fight?” Lorence asked.
“Between you and Jaden.” Margie answered.
“Oh no! Why though?” Lorence asked.
“Well, he introduced you as his good friend and not his girlfriend, and I think I find that disrespectful.” Charlotte answered.
“Oh! That? No no, I think he only did that because he did not want to put me in an awkward position.” Lorence added.
“I don’t think I understand what you’re saying, and why do you think so?” Charlotte asked.
“Yeah, I don’t understand either.” Margie added.
“Remember I told you we had a fight when he told me he would protect me and I reacted angrily to the statement? I think introducing me as his friend was a way to take the focus of his family away from me.” Lorence explained.
“Okay, the part I don’t understand is the part where you keep saying what you think. You did not discuss this part?” Charlotte asked.
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