“One must show to the traitors what is their place in this world”

It had been already several months since Stan and Beth were in London, but they couldn’t nowise find Eva, and in time it seemed to the two of them that this huge and crowded city was guilty of all that happened to them and to the others.

“Do you think that we’ll find her someday? I mean, if we’ll find Miss Stonebridge one day,” Beth asked Stan one evening when they got out of their usual den and they decided to watch the beauty of the stars that had scattered all over the sky and were amazingly sparkling around with their yellow blinks of life.

Stan instead answered nothing, for he didn’t know what answer to give to the girl, and in these months since they were here he told the girl already all the lies his little head was capable to say, but none of his predictions didn't come true, and this gave him the sensation that he is somehow at the border of a nervous breakdown and not because they couldn't find a grumpy, heartless young lady, how he used to call Eva, when he was only with Moon, because he never dared to say such words in front of Beth, for her tears immediately flowed on her cheeks and she could be angry with him for days, and the boy most hated not being able to talk to her.

His problems were related to the fact that winter was fast approaching the capital of England, and they still didn’t find a permanent place where to settle down and to be enough warm to shelter all three and more than this, he couldn’t tell Beth about this problem, because he didn’t want to scare her, but it was approaching the time to the weather be cold and Stan became more and more anxious.

“I’m not afraid of me, because I’m used to enduring days with bad weather and cold nights that cut you to the bones, but how to force her to stay in such a place, where even God doesn't exist and where you don’t know certainly if you see the day of tomorrow?!”

He also thought about breaking up with Beth and forcing her to commit in some house of rich people as a servant, but only mentioning such a possibility Beth raised such a fuss that forced the boy to step back and to keep silent for a long while.

“You want to get rid of me, don’t you? Of me and of Moon. We are a burden to you, don’t we? If so, then just say it and we are bailing as quickly as possible, even today and I swear that you won't ever see us again!” the girl answered sharply at his simple phrase: “What if you commit to someone else’s service, Beth? Look, the weather …,” but the girl didn’t stay to listen to him and right away attacked him with words, and this made the boy feel uncomfortable, especially because he wasn’t used to withstanding the onslaught of women.

He could withstand to the life of the street, where he was living alone and he could fight only with drifters like he was, for stealing a dry and moldy crust of bread, because the beggars could fight till the last drop of blood for this piece of life, thrown by someone rich and satiated enough to afford to throw such life-giving goodness because it was the survival for some of them and a possibility to see a day off tomorrow.

But what for others to throw a piece of bread was nothing, for the poor men and especially for the beggars like Stan, that small crust of bread, gnawed in places by mice or other street creatures, was a luxury that they couldn’t find every day.

“Stan, do you think that the cold times will catch us here? and Stan awoke of his daydream, listening to the girl’s question and, turning his head toward Beth, he watched her like a dumb for a short time, because he saw himself pushed to the wall by girl’s words, who was watching now the sky with her round and small mouse eyes, in which the happiness was blinking, for even if that question of her was related to their life and uncertain future, her heart was clean, as was her glance, which couldn’t lie, especially while watching the beauty of that world, which floats in the hight of the sky, far away from our world.

Receiving no answer, Beth took her eyes off the sky and she heads her glance toward Stan, who looked hardened while he was staring at her white and soft hand that was caressing and tangling Moon’s fluffy fur, who grew up so much over the summer and who was lying now on the girl’s lap, in all her cat splendor, enjoying the life-giving happiness given by the girl’s caresses.

"At least she feels the warmth and enjoys someone's love," the boy replied, whatever, and, catching Beth’s glance staring at him, he right away looked elsewhere, whispering: “I envy her!”

“Whom? Moon? Why?” Beth answered with other questions and right away she snorted in a burst of crystalline laughter.

Stan just smiled, but that smile wasn’t because of happiness, but because of sadness, for he wanted to be him the one caressed by the girl’s hand and not the cat and, catching that thought spinning in his mind, while he was comparing himself with a stupid cat and feeling ashamed, Stan quickly stood up and with his hands in his pockets he went away.

“Where are you going now? Stan, do you hear me?” but Beth received no answer and, nodding in reproach and watching in the cat’s eyes, who was staring into the girl’s glance, with her black eyes and not understanding what’s going on, the girl sighed, but right away she forced herself to smile. “Don’t worry, Moon, he will be back. He must return,” the girl tried to calm down the little fluffy animal, but in her heart, she was trying to calm herself down.

***

Stan walked slowly along the narrow path that led to the city center. It was a path that was crossing an empty field, with no houses, probably bought by someone rich enough for building something there later, that will bring more money than he had already invested in it.

But still, that place was theirs. His and Beth’s. And of course, of Moon, when sometimes the cat was deciding to follow them on their way to the city and to abandon her sleep of spinning and weaving of new dreams in her little, furry head.

And still, that path, on which they were usually crossing it with such a joy, was today so sad and so lonely, for he was crossing it today alone and Stan sighed because he disliked the feeling that was sneaking inside his soul: a kind of mix between fear and anxiety because he felt that if Eva is found, if Beth returns to her young mistress, he will be left alone, for whom needs Stan?! A lonely and grumpy beggar, because life taught him to be like this, but he changed since he met Beth, at least a little bit because the innocence and the light that was coming out of her heart were warming him and were giving him hope.

And even so, on one hand, he wanted Beth to find that heartless young lady, because this way she will leave these hazardous places, where the beggars were living their sad life and she will live again at the warmth and well, inside of a house, with a shelter above her head, but on the other hand - he was afraid to lose her because he finally understood that he feels something for her.

Feeling that he can’t breathe, Stan squatted and touched his chest with his hand. “What’s going on with me? Why do I have this weird feeling in my chest and why can't I breathe?” the boy wondered, while his hand, squeezed later in a fist, was slowly hitting his chest, trying to turn back the calmness of his breath and the rhythm of his heart beatings to their normal flow.

But his heart was stubborn, as his mind and suddenly, an image he dreamt before crossed from in front of his eyes and Stan shuddered. It was a dream with Beth and Moon leaving him alone, in an old, dilapidated, long-forgotten attic, like the one he had lived in before and a little 8-years-old boy was running after them, trying to stop them and to ask them to be with him.

That 8-years-old boy was the little Stan, who ran from the abbacy after it had caught fire, and the despair and the tears streaming down that child's cheeks forced the teenager Stan to thrill.

How he didn’t think about it before? His loneliness was more oppressive than anything in the world and that was exactly what he had been afraid of - to be left again alone and not that Beth and Moon will feel the cruel bite of the coldness during the winter.

Standing up suddenly, Stan started to run back to the place where he left Beth and Moon to wait for him and he was asking God to send them a good thought about him and to wait for him in the same place. If not, life without them will be again desert and again will be back the fights with the other beggars - for food, for a better place to sleep or simply to show to each other their strength because he stood away from all this for a long time since he met Beth because the girl dislikes such a life and she always complained when Stan was coming back to their den in the evening and she saw wounds on his fists or his face, but she never complained about the life they were living at that moment, even if that life had a lot of cold days or they were enduring hunger, but at least they were together.

“Beth, wait for me!” Stan yelled when he arrived not too far from them and he saw how Beth stood up from below, took Moon in her arms and they were leaving somewhere.

Hearing how the boy was calling her name, after days of being grumpy, Beth was amazed and she slowly turned to him, not understanding why he is running and why his voice trembles and why exactly he yells at them to wait for him in that place.

Arriving next to them, Stan suddenly hugged them both and that tight and warm hug made Beth blink quickly from her eyelashes because she knew well that he isn’t capable of such feelings and behavior or at least he never showed her that part of his being.

But even if she was amazed, Beth felt fear to push him away from her and for the first time since they knew each other a weird thrill sneaked into her heart, warming her, and step by step it crossed her being.

They stood like this for minutes in a row, listening to the heart beatings of the other one, because it was something weird and mad in that movement as if small anvils would have beaten the hot iron and small, life-giving pulsations crept into their beings and they understood that they really cared so much for each other, and that was why they were afraid to break up.

It’s why Beth had denied committing into a different house, because she thought, with her little head, that if she finds miss Stonebridge to ask her to hire Stan too and this way to take him out of the streets, for even if she didn't see so much about the hard life in the streets, in the darkness of the cold nights, she saw once something that had changed completely her life - she saw how a lifeless body was carried on a stretcher and how the dead one’s hand fell helplessly beside his body, and this scared her so much, and what made her heart frozen and her to take the decision not the leave Stan alone never, was the fact that she found out later that the dead one she saw that day was also a beggar who died in a fight with other beggars for a warmer place to sleep.

Moon’s pitiful meow, who was caught between the two, made the two young people thrill and move away from each other, watching in opposite directions, while an awkward feeling was sneaking inside their chests.

Only Moon, completely ruffling her fur, while her claws penetrated through Beth's thin dress, was watching at them completely giddy, not understanding what the Hell is going on with them because they were about to send her to the other world while hugging her as if that hug should have given her pleasure too, but in fact, it was something that could have ended with her short life.

Looking at the animal's ruffled hair, Stan smiled and his hand ruffled, even more, Moon’s fur, and as a caress, he received from Moon - three lines marked with blood on the back of his palm when her nails passed above his skin, a sign that she had disliked his joke, but the boy didn’t get upset with her and, taking the cat in his arms, he stepped in front, hugging Moon to his chest and whispering to her: “don't take it amiss, ruffly! It was just a courtesy hug between two friends” and his hand moved up and down on the animal’s back, calming him down and soon Moon’s fur became again fluffy and soft at touch.

Standing in place and watching confused behind the two friends that were leaving, Beth heard a hiccup coming suddenly out of her chest and the girl quickly covered her mouth with both palms not to be heard by Stan and her gesture wasn’t just something related to shyness or shame, but it was a weird feeling that Stan shouldn't discover the fact that she started to feel more than simple friendship or gratitude for him.

“Are you coming?” she heard like in a dream and, watching in front of her, she saw Stan waiting for her and Beth just simply nodded in approval, run toward him and when she got beside him, both stepped in silence one by the side of the other because none of them wanted to interrupt the magic that was born in their minds.

***

A few days later, Stan brought Beth to the outskirts of London, in Miss Alice Huntington’s house, an old lady past 80, but who still was looking young, despite her old age.

“Do you say that you both need some work?” Ms. Alice asked them both, watching them below the eyebrows, while Stan and Beth were sitting on their chairs, like hardened statues, as if not breathing, because they felt the imposing presence of Miss Huntington like something never lived before. “And … where did you say you heard about me?”

“From the people at the fair,” Stan answered shyly, trying to hide the slight lisp of his voice because he heard somewhere that if you aren’t sure about yourself then you don’t have the possibility to win a negotiation, because nobody likes people insecure about them. “Also, there I found that you need a teamster, because the one who worked for you was older than the world and he dropped dead, and I can do two things at once. I’m stronger than a bull. Just look over here,” and Stan raised his arm, trying to show his muscles, but instead of a built body everybody saw his bones being outlined through his skin and it just sketched a smile on Miss Alice’s lips, but she right away drove that smile away, trying to be as severe as possible, even if her heart was never capable of severeness.

“All right then. If you say you are capable of doing all kinds of work, you are accepted for the job, but I want to inform you that I don’t like lazy people nor I’ll accept childish behavior from you. In this house, one wakes up earlier in the morning and goes to bed later in the night, because I have many lessees and none of them likes to see his room uncleaned or in disorder.”

“Don’t worry, Miss Huntington,” Beth answered calmly and Stan was amazed to see how calm and sure about herself was the girl, and the boy told himself that this must be because she grew up surrounded by wealthy and educated people. “I’ve worked before in a house of rich people and I know how to keep clean and to bring in order for someone's things. I’ll make it my responsibility, but I have one more favor to ask you, even if it might seem a dare and an impudence of me, but I must do it.”

“What exactly?” Miss Alice asked, but the answer did not take long to appear when from under Beth’s clothes could be seen Moon’s black head and two black eyes like the coal stared into the glance of the old lady as if imploring her to accept her too.

The two teenagers waited for the old lady’s answer with a cold sweat running down their backs, while they were watching the slow and lazy movements of Moon, who completely exited from under the girl’s clothes and started to beg for Miss Alice’attention while sneaking between her legs and touching her body of old lady’s dress as if it was a necessary movement to win the love of this old lady if she wants to stay at warmth this winter and to weave her clew of dreams inside of a house and not under cold cardboard as the one under which she had spent her days till Stan found her.

Miss Alice slowly bent and with her knobby and long fingers, she took the cat’s body from below and put her on her lap. Moon right away curled up and started to weave farther the thrill of her life, not paying attention at all to the other two members of her family, who were staring at her, as if she had forgotten completely about their love.

“Traitor!” Stan growled through his teeth barely heard, but he kept silent when he felt Beth’s fingers grabbing the skin of his arm and keenly squeezing it, but even if it hurt a lot, Stan made no sound, while he continued to stare at that black peewee, who he practically took out of the jaws of death, fed him and warmed him at his chest, but who so easily forgot about his kindness.

“You can start today if you are free,” said Miss Alice, who slowly and lubberly stood up, and this movement forced Moon to roll on the floor and to stare confused around, not understanding what’s happening. “Follow me! I’ll show you what you have to do!” Miss Alice commanded them with a calm voice and she went toward the door.

Pulled by Beth by the sleeve of his coat to follow her, Stan stood up, but he didn’t drive away from the smile on his lips, seeing how Moon was crawling toward them, on her fours, looking for consolation, because of the old lady’s sudden betrayal, who chased her away from her warm lap, when the cat was about to fall asleep.

“What’s wrong with you?” Beth asked the boy, watching him from under her eyebrows. “You look as if you saw the prey and you are lurking on her as if Moon lurks after the mice.”

“I have something better than this!”

”Like what?”

Beth looked in the same direction Stan’s arm was pointing to and she saw the black furball, rubbing her body lightly against her feet and asking to be taken into her arms. “Don’t even dare to show mercy on her from now on!” Stan shortly ordered Beth. “We must show the traitors their place into this world,” and he exited the room, grumpy, while Beth was nodding in reproach, while her lips were slowly calling him “grumpy boy,” but she chased away the cat and she followed Stan, while Moon runs quickly after the girl because she knew that Beth loves her so much.