“Sometimes is better to be a quiet mouse and not the yelling cat”

“It’s still quiet,” Sophie thought while staring through the window at the nature of May that was so beautifully illuminated by the dusk sunshine, making it to be similar to a multicolored green crystal.

But this beauty wasn’t warming Sophie’s soul. She felt so cold inside, so empty and nothing could fill this void inside her, because there it was already the realm of her hatred and of thoughts of getting revenge of those who killed Edward and also of the woman who made her feel vulnerable and who trampled her honor, as Brian’s wife.

“She must die,” Sophie told Marianne after she found out that Brian is meeting someone and that she has a rival, but her elder friend was wiser than Sophie was and while cunningly smiling, Marianne told her friend: “why kill someone to get revenge? Better find out her weaknesses and use it in your favor.”

“I don’t think that I’m capable of such sacrifice, Marianne. I hate her too much to accept her near me and I’m not you to accept the presence of my husband’s mistress around me.”

“But you have to if you want to be the one honored in the end, Sophie. Or what, do you prefer others to blame you for hurting an innocent girl, who still learns about life, and to accept her instead? She’s younger and charming, while you have so many enemies already and this can be a trump card in her favor.”

“I’m not that weak and you know this. If I want someone dead, I’ll have this satisfaction.”

“No, you won’t have it. Because you don’t have Brian’s acceptance and this is something that you won’t ever have.”

“Then, what do you suggest?”

“Kill Brian and this way you will have a free path to destroy your enemy, but even so, I doubt you will succeed. Remember that the girl got her back for the rest of her life. Being a “Red Ant” gives her a privilege you won’t have ever. Only if you don’t change your mind and enter the bed of someone influential in this society.”

“I won’t ever fall so down, Marianne. I’m not … such a person.”

“Then use your brain and let others use their body for you. Be the quiet mouse who succeeded in everything, then the cat who is skillful to sneak around, but who is never able to catch the mouse.”

“And to do this, what should I do? Be someone’s mistress?”

“No. As I said, let others use their bodies and you take advantage of this. If that girl prefers to be Brian’s mistress, let her be and wait. Men are weak. He will soon find another “doll” to play with and then you can “get” the other playing your own music. It won’t be hard for her to enter someone else’s bed and to bring you satisfaction and success, while she thinks that she is getting revenge on her ex.”

“I’m not that sure that Brian and that girl will end their relationship soon. Remember that they are expecting a baby.”

“A child your husband doesn't know about and this means something: that baby isn’t his, because if he was, the girl would have taken advantage of this and you would have been a divorced woman by now and not still his wife.”

What Marianne was saying made sense, because Brian still doesn’t know that he will be a father soon, and it was something that Sophie had never expected. But what made her wonder, even more, it was the reason why Eva still keeps silent and why that baby should be a secret, but later these wandering thoughts remained only thoughts when she had been overwhelmed by anger and desire to kill those who ended with her father’s life.

One month passed since then and she still couldn’t find out who was to blame for his death. And this makes her feel so unprotected, so weak because she understands the cruel reality in which she lives: nobody cares about the dead people. If they are gone, nobody remembers them and Edward was now just a shadow, a man who existed once, who had been an important person, but he isn’t anymore and his sphere of influence faded off.

Everybody, whoever knew once Edward, is turning his back to Sophie, and she couldn’t find out anything about the businesses in which he had been involved before his death or about the woman with whom he had been seen in that period of time, and this silence, that is installing around her, makes her nervous and makes her mistake so bad, as she had never done before.

The slammed door of her room awakened her and when she turned toward the intruder, she saw a furious Brian, staring at her, as if she was Death itself. But Sophie wasn’t in the mood to argue with him, so she decided that it was time to go out for a walk, but not the same thought had Brian, who took a step in front of her, preventing her from passing.

“Was it really necessary, Sophie? Entering someone’s house, while the owner isn’t present, equates to a criminal offense. You can be called to the trial, for God Sake.”

Sophie smiled and looked into her husband’s eyes, but he wasn’t preoccupied with her: he was afraid that she was trying to find the one who he so much forced himself to keep hidden.

“Don’t worry,” she said in a passive voice. “I didn’t find who I was looking for. It seems she ran away, like a rat. But it doesn’t mean I won’t find her. It’s just a matter of time, Brian. Just a matter of time.”

“She has nothing to do with this. And you know it. For God Sake, she’s just a child. She hasn’t the power to kill someone. Think about it first and then act, Sophie. You are unpredictable now and this forces you to make bad decisions.”

“And because of whom I’m so irrational, Brian Beneath?” and Sophie’s eyes started to burn again, because of hatred, even if she tried so hard to be calm in front of her husband, with whom she couldn’t find a common language for such a long time already. “All this happens because of you and of your mistress. Since you two started to see each other, all my bad luck fell over me. My father died. My marriage is about to break up. Don’t ask me to be wise, when … a girl is taking everything that is mine. And you are mine, Brian. You are my husband and stop defending her, in front of me, because she’s not a child. Not anymore, since she entered your bed. A 17-years-old girl only, you say? At this age, some women have children already. She’s not a child anymore, Brian. She’s a woman already. You made her a woman and you made her your mistress.”

“Then blame me, for everything that happened. She’s not guilty of this.”

“And you are as stupid as always. I’m not leaving behind me this idea. I don’t want to. I told you once that if you betray me with someone and that person will try to take my place, I’ll make her crawl at my feet, while I’ll crush her like a damn bug.”

“Then, you don’t leave any choice, Sophie. I won’t stay quiet if you try to hurt her.”

“Do whatever you want, but you won’t succeed. Do you know why? It’s because a hurt woman it’s capable of everything and I’m capable of everything at this moment because I won’t lose my husband too, as I’ve lost my father.”

“You lost me the same moment you closed the door in front of me the night we married. Then I stopped being yours. Stop dreaming about the impossible.”

Brian left the room, leaving an astonished Sophie behind him. And she shuddered, because of anger and because she found out once again that he never loved her and that he never understood her. He never wanted to enter her shoes and to understand what she was feeling. She isn’t to blame, because she is sick. She can’t give him a baby and she can’t also accept him having a child with someone else. And she hates those moments when they are arguing about something and Brian is using this against her: over and over again and she can’t also understand how he doesn’t realize that this way he forces her wish even more for her rival’s death.

“She’s still breathing,” Sophie mumbled while staring at the open door. “And he still didn’t find out who Lorenne Fabeau is" and this makes Sophie think that Brian is involved in something against her.

“He always does the same when he wants to hide something,” Sophie told herself, returning to the window and staring outside, and she saw then Brian leaving home in a hurry. “He must know where the other is. It’s because of this he doesn’t tell me anything about what he found out or maybe he is really involved in my father’s death. I hope no, Brian. I hope no or I swear I’ll kill you with my own hands.”

She continued staring through the window for about half an hour more. Then she exited her room and, slowly descending the stairs, she looked around. That house is so cold and so empty and she started to hate it, even if once she loved this house so much.

“It’s perfect to kill someone here,” she whispered and slowly tapped with her fingers on the rails of the stairs. “It’s necessary only a push and someone's life will end, while he’s rolling down the stairs.”

“I know what you are thinking about, Sophie, but trust me, it’s not as easy as you think.”

Looking in front, with a lost glance, she saw Marianne, waiting for her at the end of the stairs, and saying nothing, Sophie finished descending it and passing next to her friend, she forced the other woman to follow her in the living room and both approached the chimney.

“I know that it’s not easy, Marianne. But God knows how much I want this. If she falls down the stairs and she loses her baby, I’ll be happy then” and throwing a log inside the chimney, Sophie made the flames increase, hungrily eating the wood, while she imagined this as being her stuck claws, in the enemy’s neck.

“Do you really want this?” Marianne asked her friend and touching her shoulders with both hands, she forced Sophie to look at her.

“If so, will you help me to get what I want?”

“Then let’s do this, but it won’t cool the arson in your soul. I can guarantee this.”

Now is when Sophie finally remembered that Marianne passed through something similar in the past and that she also managed to get rid of her rival’s baby by pushing her down the stairs, but what still remains a secret is if she did this alone or she had been helped by someone, but it never bothered Sophie, who always blindly believed in Ms. Chesterman, because she wasn’t only a wise woman, but she also knew how to do things to remain a secret and to make you feel complete and happy, with your revenge.