{A DEMON HAS TRIPPED ON YOUR MINE}

“Pu’er, what are you trying to pull?”

“Avner, why aren’t you looking at me?”

Why? You like me don’t you?

Everytime I look at you, you would turn away without even trying to meet my eyes. You’re purposely avoiding me.

“All this time, you’ve been trying to avoid me, haven't you?”

“What? No.”

Liar. You’re an absolut liar!

“Then why? You don’t even look at me anymore.”

“What do you even mean by that?”

He stared at me with stern eyes. There wasn’t even any confusion in his words, just a straight question.

Had I mistaken him all this time?

That his reply that night..

“Pu’er. You’re probably misunderstanding…”

Shut up!

Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!

I released the mine and stumbled.

I fell into his arms, my face burned.

I pushed him away, he dropped onto his chair, scratching the floor.

Why was I so dumb? I should’ve noticed since that day.

I turned around and grabbed my bag.

He never liked me to begin with.

It was all some made up delusion.

===

My heart hurts. It hurts.

Why Avner? Why did you change?

You were obviously showing signs of interest, so why?

…

No. I’ve been deluding myself. All this time, I’ve been making up things. It’s my fault.

He only borrowed my notes, nothing else.

He never initiated anything.

He only cared about me because he knew I was an angel.

It was all a big, big misunderstanding.

I’m such a big fat dummy.

It’s so unfair.

Why don’t I remember what he said that night?

What happened that night?

I want to know.

What your answer was.

I’m scared.

What if he rejects me?

But he already rejected me.

Is there any point holding on?

“But what if he still likes me..”

Or what if he’ll like me in the future..

I brought up the golden interface.

This thing.

It was this that changed him.

Did he even like me in the first place?

Ugh..

I beat my fist on my pillow.

Repeatedly.

Gritting my teeth.

Tears began to fall and I buried my face into my pillow.

It hurts. Heartbreak hurts!!

I can’t. I can’t take this.

Avner, do you like me or not?

Please just tell me.

Tell me!

I have to tell him to tell me!

Rather than sitting around being tormented like this.

I even have to prepare for the exams next week.

I can’t focus on my studies anymore.

Why did I notice it at this sort of time? Why not some other time? Why? Why? Why?!

===

“What happened, Pu’er?”

Brunette could tell at a single huh?

I peek at Avner, he was also taking note of me. My heart jumped.

Don’t look at me like that, you dummy! Don’t try to make me think you like me again if you obviously don’t!

“Is it about him?”

“Brunette. Do you think he likes me?”

“You’re asking me this question? I thought you confessed to him last time? What response did he give you? You don’t remember.”

“I don’t. I don’t know why I don’t.”

I slammed my head into my folded arms on the table.

I know why I don’t. It’s because I was reawakened as an angel at that exact moment! It’s as if the world is trying to cause problems for me. It’s so unfair. I hate you!

It still hurts.

I need to know.

Does he like me.. or not.

If he likes me then everything will be solved.

If he doesn’t like me then..

I want to know why.

I still can’t believe he didn’t take interest in me before. I clearly remember those eyes. He became an entirely different person the moment he realized that he was a demon.

“Pu’er, don’t be sad.”

Then don’t poke me!

===

The entire week was hell.

My heart hasn’t settled. It still hurts. I don’t know why I keep trying to convince myself that Avner likes me when he clearly doesn’t.

He didn’t even come to ask how I was. He just sat there, drawing his whatever.

Today we’ll have to go to Cain’s office again. It’s going to be so awkward. Maybe he’ll just leave me alone.

“Pu’er. Let’s go.”

He beat all my expectations. Stop trying to make me yearn for you!

I notice Ares and Brunette look at us like what’s going on? I don’t even know.

I feel like Avner is toying with me. What kind of person toys with another person’s emotions anyways? Did you think it’s fun to be me? Do you even know how much it hurts?

“Pu’er.”

“What?”

“I’ll tell you the truth of what happened that night. After the exam, next Friday, there’s still some time left before we are released from school.”

Oh, so now you’re going to confess to me? Why couldn’t you have said it earlier? And you’re even telling me to even wait till next Friday? I’ll die from stress you know?!

===

I learnt a new truth today.

I can die if I’m not careful.

Maybe that’s why Avner doesn’t want to be with me? Maybe it’s because he’s a demon, and can’t trust me?

No, that can’t be it. There has to be something..

[Pu’er, do you feel like writing a blog today?]

“I have to write.. I can’t keep skipping..”

I skipped yesterday’s session because I really just wasn’t in the mood. With the exams coming, I can’t think straight. Trying to come up with something to write in this sort of pressure is impossible.

But I have to do it today because I missed doing it yesterday.

What should I write?

Something.. and idea..