《The Natural Dungeon of Bugs》Chapter 1
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'Ugh, my head’ Matt sighed, slowly waking his head pounding with pain as he did so, instinctively opening his eyes and seeing nothing but a small blue blinding light. So bright that it was that he immediately closed his eyes upon sighting it lest he lost them in their entirety.
“Oh good, you're awake I see,” A strange Computer-like voice that seemed to come out from nowhere said.
“Who, who…” Matt said opening his eyes, intent on locating the source of the mysterious voice, regretting this decision immediately, the light that had been so far off in the distance the first time he’d tried this having grown closer, so close that it almost blinded him in it’s slender, instantly closing his eyes for the second time but not before grabbing the bearest of glimpses upon the words that were laid upon it.
Welcome young dung..on to Ed..., we at S….s…... co.. welc..m.. you … ho…. you have .... p...da……………………
‘What’ Matt thought, committing all he could catch to memory, blinking his eyes shut before the light could overwhelm him.
"Hi, my name's Bob. I've been assigned to be your system guide by the world system itself, isn’t that great...” The voice said, Matt's head pounding louder and louder than ever before with every word that the voice spoke.
“Right then, shall we get to work?” The voice said.
“No, No we won’t go to work!WHO in all THE FORK'S ARE YOU.” Matt screamed slightly stunned out of his depth, wondering what in all of the 7 hells was going on.
“Oh I told you that already master, I’m your system guide…..”
“OH RIGHT..right..right...” Matt said pondering, the voice’s, ‘no Bob's.’, Bob’s words. Instinctively taking a long deep breath out and in, initially centring himself before going any further knowing that the rage-filled state could only make things worse for him.
‘In’“HUHHHH…..”
‘Out’ “Hahhh…”.
‘In’“HUHHHH…..”
“And what is a system guide exactly?” Matt asked breathing outwards as he did so.’For that matter how the hell did I get here…’
“Well…..” the voice said and started to explain, starting what might well hopefully become a long and fruitful relationship.
“So you're saying I died”
“Yes” Bob, the seemingly all-mental voice said.
“And, and you're master, your creator, the AI-like system who according to you rules this world and many others like it. saved my life and turned me into this, this thing! What you call a dungeon core!" Matt said, shouting, filled with a sudden need to hit this faceless voice yet finding himself unable to do so in his present situation.
“Well, it’s more complicated than that....” Bob the voice said, Matt ever so promptly interrupting him.
“So I’m not a talking stone that can’t move, can’t talk, can’t even have an F….,F….Fdump?” Matt said attempting to spit this last part out despite the seemingly all-powerful system's forceful ban upon any and all swearing. ‘Man I miss swearing...' He wishfully thought, thinking of all the many words he would be using on this self-righteous arrogant twit that called himself Bob if he ever had the chance.
“Yes exactly”
‘Ughh’ Matt thought, having to force himself not to scream at Bob, pressing down all the screaming rage that was seeming under the schemes of his mind, begging, crying, demanding to be set free upon Bob and the world at large.
“This world, like so many others, was formed by some flux in the quantum realm however small it might have been but in time energy rose in the world, dungeon core’s started to appear and started to create life as they tend to do but with no control, destroying everything they came across. With every dungeon, processing only instinct to guide them, battling for the energy of the world. Before, finally the system. May its wisdom be infinite. Came and took Eden into its guiding embrace. And so you see energy is the lifeblood of dungeons. And yet without a mind to use what are you……………" Bob rambled, rambling onward to oblivion and beyond, about the origins of energy and the world at large, for the past how many hours and days it had been since he’d first started, ever since Matt had made the unfortunate criminal mistake of curiosity.
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‘Aghh, what I would do for some decent headphones right about now...’, He thought in clear pain, not for the first time missing the modern earthly comforts of home;’ Not that would help much in my current state. Still, they would be nice to have If only I…………’,
"MASTER!" Bob shouted, suddenly mentally screaming the words across the Mental bond that they both shared, Matt's head filling with pain as Bob shouted the words, mentally screaming the words as loud as he possibly could, forcing him out from his meditative thought retreat and back to the land of the living.
"What, what, I'm awake, You didn’t need to shout that hard!", Matt thought/said, his head pounding with intense pain the likes of which he’d never felt before.
"Yes, master, I see that...", Bob said, surprising Matt with his sudden sarcasm a thing Matt hadn’t thought to be possible of him as till now he'd always speak in the same robotic-like manner that he'd used ever since matt had first met him.
"Bob, I’m sorry, I'm just so bored, can't we just do something else?", Matt asked, hopeful as hell that Bob wouldn't be his usual self and could, mayhap's, just this once, possibly move on and leave it be.
‘And maybe, just maybe dogs could fly,’ Matt sarcastically thought knowing from little he knew of Bob that this was just not something possible for him to do.
’, Honestly, anything would be better than these boring lectures of his that he keeps giving.', Matt accidentally thought, so, so, tired as he was of Bob’s constant rant-like lectures that could go on for days at a time, filling Matt with nothing but plain boredom with the occasionally practical dungeonie life lesson in between. ‘Agh, why can’t he teach me something more fun……’
“Like what, Master, what would be more fun and exciting?” Bob said, having seemingly read his thoughts, something that he knew annoyed him to no end and yet, yet he did it anyway.
’Ugh’, ”Bob! Don’t do that!” Matt screamed, so filled with anger that he was that instead of softly whispering his words through to Bob’s side of the mental bond that, they both shared, that allowed them to communicate with each other, that he screamed the words instead, screaming his words as loud as he mentally could across the Bond.
“Sorry”, Bob said, saying the words yet not meaning them, with any sincerity, whatsoever, something that Matt knew to be true from the many past experiences he’d had, this exact scenario having already repeated itself many times before.
Bob would read his thoughts, as he had just done, again, and again, and again, only to suddenly stop, having been caught in the act, apologizing as fast as he possibly could only for it to happen all over again the very next day. And Matt was sick of it. Sick of it.
It was his mind, his thoughts, his secrets, the things most precious, the things he wanted to keep hidden at all costs, that Bob read. They were his and his alone.
And yet Bob. Bob could just have a stroll inside, sit down, have a coffee, and look around, inside, right into his mind, thoughts, whenever he damn well pleased, with Matt non the wiser and Matt could do nothing to stop him. Nothing. Nothing whatsoever. And it terrified him, Terrified him to the core.
"As I told you before master, I can only see your surface thoughts"
"Oh and I'm supposed to believe that?" matt asked, internally thinking the words out loud.
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"Yes"
"Well I don't Bob, I don't," Matt said, unable to believe a single word that he said. 'Agh,The sheer arrogance of him, How he can live with himself is beyond me. Oh, how I so wish for the ability to stop him. But sadly it’s impossible, it seems.’.Matt wishfully thought, filled with such hopelessness that he could not help but want to act on it.
“Master”, Bob said, his words appearing out of nowhere as they always did, lifting him out of his self-pity-filled brooding, thought-filled state that he’d just been in and back to the land that was reality.
“Yes,” Matt said. ‘What now, Does he want me to sell my liver, my kidneys, my balls, well too late they're all gone!’
"No Master, of course not. Why would I ever ask you to sell a liver? That would be quite an impossible feat Master..." Bob said, not seeming to catch the sarcasm that was involved in his words.
‘Hah, I Got him’ Matt thought, internally laughing, filled with slight joy at the fact that he’d finally gotten one over on Bob, accidental as it was.
“Agh that was what humans called a joke,” Bob said a second or so later mat's thought's having seemingly let him in on it.
“Yes, Bob, yes it is,” Mat thought/said internally laughing as hard as he possibly could, happy beyond all joy that he'd finally gotten one over the mighty Bob. As, as accident and jock-filled as it was, it was still something.
“Oh, Ok, master,” Bob said with the same business as usual look that he always seemed to use whenever Matt talked to him, the jock seemingly having not fazed him in the east. “, Anyway, as I was saying there does exist a way”
“A way,, a way to do what, Exactly?” Matt said, wondering what the hell Bob was talking about.
“A way to block my mental probes, of course," Bob said. “Who knows perhaps it could even get rid of that nasty status effect of yours, the one you brought from your home dimension, what was its name again, dirt was it? Silly name for a planet really, I could think of some far better names like Zeno, Pro, Peno, Zeus” Bob said, rambling away..
‘Really that’s possible, that’s really possible but, why did he never tell me,’ Matt thought leaving Bob to his Rambl’s amazed by what Bob had just said, wondering why Bob had never told him that this was even possible before now. ‘Why would he do such a thing...’
“Because you never asked,” Bob suddenly said, seemingly having read Matt’s thoughts yet again, interrupting him mid-thought as he did so.
“What?” Matt asked, a slight bit slow on the uptake, unable to comprehend what Bob had just said.
“Because you never asked,” Bob suddenly said, repeating himself word for word. “That’s why I never told you”
Why would that stop you,” Matt asked? “Surely you could have told me at some point in the past however long we’ve been together”
“14 months, six days and five hours,”
“What?” Matt said, his mind still slightly stuck on the download, unable to comprehend Bob's words.
“14 months, six days and five hours, that’s the amount of time that has passed since you first arrived here, master,” Bob said, going totally and utterly off-topic as he tended to do as was his nature.
, “And as to your second question my priming only permits me to answer questions and things that are of relevance to you as a dungeon core and this topic was not of relevance till now, as such, I could not tell you how to Block me till now. Does that answer your question master? Or would you like me to go into further detail,” Bob said, saying the last bit with such eagerness, showing emotion something Bob had rarely if ever done in all of the time that they had spent together.
“Translation you can only tell me things that don’t relate to being a dungeon when I ask you to,” Matt said, filled with slight annoyance/anger for not seeing it sooner.
“Simple but correct, though there….” Bob said, attempting to go into yet another rant.
“Oh, Ok,” he said, stopping Bob in his tracks before he could start up yet another rant. “So how do I do that?
“That….” Bob said seemingly confused.
“Yes, How do I block you?” Matt excitedly asked wanting to get started as soon as possible.
“Oh that’s simple master”
“So, how do I do that,” Matt said, growing slightly impatient with every second that went by.
“As I said, it's a simple matter, master. You simply need to create a mental barrier. “
“A what?”
“A mental barrier, Master,” Bob said, going into further detail. “A barrier made entirely up of mental energy, its purpose being to protect one from mental attacks, affording the owner of said barrier certain protection from certain mental status effects that may come one's way”
“Certain. Not all?” Matt asked, picking up on Bob's choice of words, slightly worried that Bob might be trying to trick him in some way.
“Yes, master, mental barriers are not perfect, at some point, if put under enough pressure, they will break, But trust me this will work. Well, it should”
“Should. Should. That’s not good enough Bob.”Matt said wanting more than just should, suddenly filled with a deep unknowable rage that had seemingly come out of nowhere only for it to disappear twice as fast.
“I’m sorry master. That’s all I have. It’s either this or nothing”
‘Goddammit’, Matt thought, taking a deep breath, counting down from ten before speaking again. ‘This better work, Bob” he said, directing his words through to Bob’s side of the bond as fast as he possibly could, wanting as he did to have this whole business done as fast as was mentally possible.
“It will, master. It will. Trust me”
“It better,” ‘Or I will find to kill you if it’s the last thing I do’, Matt thought/said, Unintentionally thinking the last thoughts, not meaning the words yet sending them anyways.
“Yes master,” Bob said seemingly not afraid of Matt's non-threat threat.
‘’ “Ok So how do we do this?”
“Ok, so there’s really two ways you could do this master, but seeing as you're seemingly in a hurry to get this done we’ll go with the fast route,” Bob said, as he started to explain what needed to be done. “Okay, here it goes, so first off, before we can do anything you need to bring up your status page”
“My what?”,’What the bell’s a status page?’, ”What are you talking about Bob? What’s a status page?”
“Oh a status page is….” Bob said going into his rant mode, his tone shifting into the one that he tended to use whenever he went into one of his far of rants that took ages to complete that took thousands upon thousands of Matt's time from him.
“Bob!” Matt Screamed, stopping Bob before he could waste any more of his time.
“Yes, master?” Bob said Matt was mentally smiling high on the knowledge that he managed to stop Bob before he could go any further into his rant.
“Just tell me how to use it”
“Yes, master You...” Bob said, seemingly attempting to go into yet another rant.
“In simple terms…..” Matt ssighed forcing himself not to scream knowing it wouldn’t make Bob go any faster and would in effort, just probably, slow him down even more instead.
“In simple terms?”
“Yes,” Matt said sighing wishing for what felt like the thousandth time the ability to swear.“Look, Can you just tell me in two maybe three words what I’m supposed to do.
“Yes”
“Then do it '' Matt said, wanting more than anything to have this over and done with as fast as was dungeoniely possible...
“It’s simple to master, you just simply think and it appears”
“Oh, that simple?”
“Yes, master”
‘Hhh, Bob sometimes you make me want to scream,'
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