《Heralds of the Dark Age: Hound of Sorrow》Chapter 18: Stubborn
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I sat in the garden, staring at the paper before me. Anna stood off to the side as she practiced with a long handle of what might have been a mop at some point. With the energy built up in me, I ran my finger across the paper in a circle. Salvester had informed me that Misana was unwilling to leave her room after the previous day. The line glowed for a moment and then sat on the paper. With that done, I let out a heavy sigh and leaned back.
Anna stopped mid jab and looked to me, having switched out her maid dress for more proper armor. She asked, "Giving up or did you finally manage to do it?"
"As a matter of fact, I actually managed to do it," I said, putting on an air of smugness. She walked over, drove the but of the training spear into the ground, and leaned on it.
She stared at the line and asked, "So then you put the rune thing in the middle and...what? It explodes?"
I huffed and said, "Whatever the rune is for, actually. Though, I must ask...How do people not use this sort of thing more?"
She stared at the circle for a moment and said, "Yeah, that's....mostly because of that demon possession thing. Did anyone even tell you that the only known way to cure the possessed is death? Mages are power and destructive forces that tend to self-destruct. Even further, ever seen one of those mage's guild lot? So yeah, rare to see in combat. Though, their crafted things do show up more. Still not something the normal soldier would have, but that's the general fact."
With a shrug, I looked back down at the page. So much had happened since Veline had been taken from me. I couldn't help but wonder if she'd even view me as she had. Anna asked, "Hey, what's with that look on your face?"
I shook my head, eyes on the circle as a frown began to form on my face. The longer I took, the more Veline would miss. Yet if I called upon the Cruel Poet and he was left wanting? I would die. The infection within had to be the demon. Bending the basic concept was clearly magic. The third had left me the most confused. Character development was the most vague statement and no doubt was on purpose. I couldn't help but imagine the many masked god laughing at my struggle.
My mind wandered a bit and I asked, "When will I actually be allowed to go outside the walls?"
The guard raised her eyebrow and a small grin formed on her face. She asked, her tone sickly sweet, "Ah, getting a bit of cabin fever? Want to go down to the town and scare the commoners a bit?"
I shot her a glare and then shook my head, unsure what even I wanted. Calmly wiped the circle from the page and said, "You know, back in my world people would dream of this sort of event. Being taken to another world full of magic and adventure. I remember wishing I could escape that life I had and start anew."
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Her face changed from it's playful look to a more shocked one. She awkwardly stopped leaning on her practice spear and eyed me for a moment. Finally, Anna asked carefully, "Was it really that bad?"
That was a question I didn't have the answer to right away. *Would I go back?* I wondered, mulling it over grimly. I let out a bitter chuckle and said, "You know, at least here I have a future. Back there? I died, abandoned and hated."
I leaned slightly so that the front legs of the chair lifted slightly off the ground and looked up to the blue sky. With a deep breath, I continued, "Here at least I can disprove the people's hate by not doing what they think I will."
She took a seat in the chair opposite and wiped the sweat from her head. Quiet fell over the two of us for a moment. The only sound I could hear was two staff members arguing over something to do with the flowers and their proper watering. For a moment I wondered if there truly was no standard staff, but Anna broke my considerations when she asked, "Give any thought to what Lady Lura'mi wants from you?"
With a renewed annoyance, I said, "No."
Anna rolled her eyes and said, "You know when she returns she'll ask and you better give her the answer."
Carefully, I repeatedly drew the circle and dismissed it. I knew she was right, but I didn't really see the point of trying at that moment. Anna slapped the paper suddenly and my view darted up to her. She stared at me with a very unamused look as she said, "Come on, Alexander. You need to do this. Stop being childish about it."
Frowning, I crossed my arms and returned her with the same look. I asked, sarcastically, "Since you seem to have an idea, why not give me a hint?"
Anna's eyes traveled about the area to the few staff that were in the area. Drumming her fingers on the table top, she said, "Ok. Fine. I see this is going to literally require it. She wants you to marry Misana why?"
I said, trying to mask my emotions, "No idea."
Her face told me all too clearly that she knew what I was doing. She stood up, walked around the table, grabbed me by the shirt, and dragged me to my feet. Anna said, a cruel smile on her face, "Ok then. I hear that exercise helps people think."
I lay on the ground, several of the disguised staff watching on from some distance. My breath was ragged as Anna stood there, her practice spear held across the back of her shoulder with her hands holding it on either side. She asked, "Figured it out yet, or you need another couple of laps."
I looked up at her and grimaced, saying, "Th...this isn't hel...helping."
She rolled her eyes and said, "Oh it is. We'll do this every day till you figure it out."
I let out a grunt of pain as my body ached. She had run me around the grounds several times. If I slowed, she'd jab me with the practice spear till I kept going. After two or three times, I collapsed onto the ground. She grinned saying, "You can either figure it out or become strong. Win win right?"
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There on my back, I had to wonder if being stubborn with her on this was worthwhile. I muttered, "By why me?"
Anna frowned heavily and jabbed me painfully in the stomach with the butt of the spear. She said, "Gods above, Alexander, you are rough around the edges but still. Who else? Misana would never be able to do it. Captain Zent? Don't know if you noticed, but he's no people person. Worse than you even. He also wouldn't ever look at Misana in such a way. Why don't you want to accept why you are the most obvious person for the job?"
I growled a soft curse out and said, "I don't know what you are talking about."
The woman frowned and turned away, saying, "Then we'll see which is more of a problem for you to continue doing. I can't fathom why you refuse to admit it, but I'll run you ragged till you be honest with yourself on this. Whatever you want, though. Roll over, time for pushups."
Misana returned to the library the next day and the two us pretended nothing had happened. Anna would then take me to the garden and force me to exercise till I collapsed, but I wouldn't attempt to any understanding of what Lady Lura'mi wanted. Around a week passed, and I sat in the garden after the exercise and looked up to one of the windows. I could see Misana there and she suddenly quickly turned away.
Anna huffed at me as she poured water from a pitcher into a pair of mugs, saying, "If it wasn't for what I knew, I'd almost call you two cute."
Looking at the well trained soldier of a woman, she didn't seem to hold any sort of sarcasm on her face as she handed me the drink. I looked down into the water for a moment as I said, "Listen, I don't believe she loves me."
She raised an eyebrow and sat, downing her own water, yet was quiet. So I continued, "I don't know, but I can't even begin to believe that. I can't imagine how it must feel to have other's emotions thrust upon you and she probably doesn't know what a lot of her own emotions are anymore."
Anna sat still and stared at me as I talked. After a moment she said, "I can't disagree honestly. Still, your promise has given her something to desperately hold onto right? Perhaps she knows that and is desperately trying to make herself love you."
I took a slow drink of the water and let out a sigh. I said, "I admit, knowing she has the memories of that had ruined my previous life is not something so easily overlooked. I can't forgive that woman, but Misana doesn't deserve all this either. It'd be a sick twisted joke for her to continue this if she only views me as some manner of redemption."
Anna eyed me for a few moments, her face unusually grim. She shook her head and said, "That's a romantic ideal, though. It's not uncommon for people of her station to marry for mere power and gain. It might be awful, but at least she wants this. If that is your worry, why not try to actually make those misunderstood feelings she having, if they are, real?"
I shook my head, saying, "It'd be wrong."
Her gaze grew far more sharp as she stared at me. After a second of tense silence, she said, "That's stupid, you know. This is going to be a thing anyways, so wouldn't it be better if you two had some sort of actual affection between you? You at least seem to care beyond that bullshit you said to Lady Lura'mi. Calling it wrong is awful, sense it'd be more than she'd ever likely have normally."
I frowned and sat down my mug. She seemed far too agitated about the topic and I couldn't help to wonder if it had something to do with whatever had happened with that baron. I didn't want to probe into that topic, so I asked, "Why do you care this much about it?"
A deep frown formed on her face as she said nothing and she began to down her water. I tried to catch any change in her expression as she sat there. Anna clearly cared far more than she let on about the topic, but I couldn't even begin to guess at why. She sat there for a while before shaking her head slowly and saying, "Listen, Alexander. Misana could have a happier life with you in it. Even if she is feeling something that she is mistaking for love, that's far better than her wanting to die right? So, if you do actually care for her in some way, you should at least try since you two will be together anyways."
She wouldn't meet my gaze as she talked, instead staring off at the flowers. This conversation was making her upset, I could tell. I knew vaguely that whatever happened with the Baron wasn't of her own will, so I didn't feel right arguing with her. I let out a sigh and said, "I hate that Lady Lura'mi insists on this. She knows the full story and is actively still pushing it."
Anna let out a tired and annoyed sigh, saying, "At Least I understand that feeling really well. Do you know why yet?"
I twitched and stared at her, silent and unwilling to speak. She rolled her eyes, then said, "Ok then. Listen, if you insist on playing this game of not knowing, want to help me with my weapon training? I'm sure if, atleast, we took the initiative to teach you some stuff along with getting you fit? Lady Lura'mi will maybe not punish you full power."
I considered for a moment how much of that was a joke versus a reality that might be. Then I leaned back and said, "Alright. I'll do so, but I still don't know what you think I even know."
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