CHAPTER 19 - DENIAL

DATE POINT: APRIL 17TH, 7 A.U. (AFTER UNIFICATION)

LOCATION: SOL SYSTEM, ABOARD UTRN INDOMITABLE WILL

LIEUTENANT PAUL KARST

The last week and a half had been good to the crew, and to Paul’s recovery. Having little to stress over, aside from the occasional swerving maneuver had done wonders for Paul’s recovery. The entity as well had seemed to disappear entirely, much to Paul’s relief, though Paul was sure it would be back soon enough. He felt a strange spike of pleasure at the notion, which creeped him out slightly before it disappeared. His mind moved on to other things. Their steady deceleration over the past weeks had now brought them back down to the real space equivalent of the speed of light, meaning they were ready to return to the third dimension. They were set to emerge several hundred kilometers from a dense patch of larger icy bodies identified in the half light year cone ahead of them.

“Fleetwide directive; We are preparing to exit FTL, stow all gear and prepare for turbulence. Raise barriers and prepare to invert on my mark. Helm, be ready for aggressive evasive maneuvers in case we emerge into an asteroid field after dropping our barriers. Point defense teams be at your stations and ready to deflect or destroy dangerous asteroids. Inverting in T minus sixty seconds.” Henry said.

“I can’t wait to get a break from constant antimatter chicken.” Jenkins said.

“I can’t wait to dump some of this excess heat buildup. It’s been getting a tad sweaty in here.” Chantal replied, fanning herself a bit while looking at Henry.

“Being back in real space should hopefully ease some of the stress the crew has been carrying.” Commander Alvarez replied. “We may not have an active mutiny risk anymore, but the amount of fights, agitation, and superstitious talk amongst the crew is still too high for my liking.”

“I just want some fresh water and oxygen; the air has been getting too stale for me. It smells like Jenkins’ gym bag no matter where I am in the ship.” Paul complained, much to Jenkins' consternation.

“Hey! Take it easy on the poor kid. You have been running him ragged in training, and you know he only showers like once a week. Plus, it’s kinda hard to avoid the smell when he follows you everywhere you go.” Ariana chimed in, looking quite pleased with herself after seeing the look of outrage on Jenkins face.

“Hey, I resemble that remark!” Jenkins said, finally showing some of the thicker skin he had been developing. Paul gave him a slap on the back hard enough to make his hand sting.

Henry just gave his best disappointed dad look and held one finger up, which was enough to shut them all up. Seeing them quiet, Henry pulled up the comms app.

“Fleetwide directive; All systems green, barrier control prepare to invert in five, four, three, two, one!” The ship shuddered as the rip in spacetime just ahead of them was torn wide open as their barrier-wrapped ship slid smoothly back into their home dimension. “Drop barriers on my mark, be ready to evade or redirect any hazardous debris, now!”

Forward cameras registered an awe inspiring sight before them as the null matter sheath slid away to reveal the world to their cameras once more. Millions of comets, asteroids and assorted icy bodies stretched in front of them as far as the eye could see. Most were visible only by very faint sunlight reflecting off their surfaces. They had arrived at the Oort cloud at last and had set a new record for the farthest from Earth any living humans had traveled.

Paul let off a slow whistle as the system map updated itself in real time as their active radar returns came back with a more complete picture of the hazards in front of them. A few smaller potential collision hazards were atomized or pushed off course by point defense lasers as their helmsman charted a course around the larger debris.

“This should be a good one,” Henry said, as he pulled up a scan from one of the closer large icy bodies nearby. “Helm, take us in to range of the identified comet. Give me one more active sensor sweep to make sure we are alone and then we will deploy our trailing radiators. Might as well dump some of this excess heat while we can. Raise the launch rails for the Hephaestus so we can begin processing that comet.”

A cheer arose from the crew in the CIC, everyone seemed to be working with a new energy. Even after all this time, Paul still found himself begrudgingly impressed by Henry’s ability to rally the crew.

“Nothing on the scopes, any of them. It’s a ghost town out here.”

“Perfect, then we begin ice mining operations immediately. I think it’s high time we get this ship cooled off, go ahead, and deploy our trailing radiators. Hephaestus, you are clear to launch, I just updated your processing target through FleetNet. Drone control, deploy signal satellites and begin combat space patrol flights immediately, you're our eyes and ears out there, so watch those scopes carefully. We should by all means be completely alone out here, but we should never take that for granted in any situation. The longer we stay out here in one spot the more exposed we are, especially dumping our heat like we are.”

The ship lurched as their foundry ship launched from its embedded rails on the exterior of the Indomitable Will. Paul watched it course correct slightly before it decelerated into a perfect stationary orbit over the target mining area on the slowly tumbling mass of rock and ice. Mining drones launched from the Hephaestus along with a pair of gunships modified into mobile mining lasers and doubling as signal relays. Together, this system allowed for the mining of a wide range of materials from the comfort of the nearly two hundred meter long ship. Within minutes, there was a constant stream of mining drones returning with laser cut ice chunks captured in their TK fields, returning to their mothership to be melted down and the impurities processed out.

By the end of following day, the Indomitable Will would be fully restocked with the single most precious resource in outer space: water. With access to water and enough electricity, they could then refill their fresh oxygen reserves and hydrogen reserves through electrolysis as well as providing enough water for drinking and sanitation for the thousands of souls who lived and worked aboard the nine ships in his fleet.

Paul felt some tension release that he didn’t realize that he had been holding. His good mood paired with their relative safety gave him a sense of calm that he hadn’t felt in the months following their departure from S33. Part of him had half expected them all to die at any time, for there to be some unknown issue with their FTL drive that would kill them by splitting their atoms apart, or for them to fall victim to some other horrible end. The mission so far had yet to live up to the suicide mission moniker that he had heard the crew whisper about when they thought he was out of earshot or wasn’t listening. Truth was, Paul was always listening.

He had squashed such talk where possible, trying to keep it from spreading or reaching Henry’s awareness, but it persisted, nonetheless. Paul suspected that people simply were inventing such fears to keep the drama and intrigue alive to help pass the time when the tediousness of FTL travel got to be too much for them.

“Henry, why don’t you call for a few hours of general liberty? Let the crew blow off some steam.” Paul said. “I’m going to go walk the ship for a bit.”

“Sounds like a good idea, I will put the word out for that in just a little bit. We will have to put that on a rotation then.”

“Penny for your thoughts?” Ariana bumped Paul, who realized he must have been looking pensive. He looked at Henry with a barely perceptible nod before he casually walked off the raised system map platform with her in tow. Jenkins, his perpetual shadow followed behind closely.

“I am concerned that the last few weeks of relative peace have been more of an illusion than Henry wants to believe.” Paul said. “The crew has been spreading ghost stories, even after we got rid of the bad actors causing them.”

Ariana had a complicated look on her face before she spoke. “We are haunted though, each of us, by the ghosts of our past and the pressures we find ourselves in now. Some more than others.” She said cryptically.

“What do you mean by that?” Jenkins asked.

“Look around you, Preston. The crew here is young, immature, stressed to hell, and most of them carry the scars of deep trauma from the war. Each one of them is battling their own internal demons, a battle which few, if any are winning.” Ariana said.

“We picked war orphans intentionally because they had nobody at home to wonder after where they went. Many of them have deep issues and PTSD, struggle with insomnia and interpersonal relationships, and they are all trapped here in this tin can together without a pressure release valve. It’s no wonder our psych team is so overworked, and the MA’s are breaking up fights constantly. We all knew there would be extreme difficulties on this mission, but that doesn’t make it any easier to deal with these admittedly predictable consequences.” Paul said.

“Isn’t that a bit unfair to lump everyone into that same category?” Jenkins asked. “I mean, I had just as bad of a background as half of them, but I can handle myself appropriately.”

“Yeah, by being a relentless people pleaser and letting people walk all over you? Don’t try and act like you are problem-free just because the consequences of your past are internalized rather than externalized.” Ariana said in an icy tone.

“Jeez, fuck me for saying anything.” Jenkins said in a sarcastic tone.

“Not even in your wildest dreams, Preston.” Ariana replied, not missing a beat. Jenkins opened his mouth to say something and thought better of it. Paul just shook his head with a smirk and kept walking.

“Trust me on this one, Jenkins, you are better off for it, too.” Paul said, deciding to twist the knife a little.

“Well fuck you too, Paul.” She said, her eyes narrowing.

“Hey, I’m not the one that treats my partners like toys.” Paul said, feeling like taking none of her shit. “Remember, I am the one that has to clean up after your messes. Worst job ever.”

“Oh, like you are any better? Mr I'll fuck any willing bottom? Plus, you know why I am the way I am. The Ascension Project did not treat me at all the same as it treated you. I will never allow a man to dominate me in that, or any way, ever again. I don’t owe you or anyone a single word of explanation. If they have a problem with the boundaries I set, then it belongs to them alone, and they aren't worth my time.” Ariana said. “At least I am real and up front about my issues, you just lie to get what you want and move on. We can review your own history all day long if you want, but I don’t think you are ready to have that conversation.”

Ariana fixed him with a steely gaze, daring him to fight her on the topic. Paul had to concede the point to her, he had left quite a few men and women hanging in his past after a whirlwind night filled with booze and bullshit. Even if his motivations for lying were different than what she implied, there was no way he would get caught up in a conversation defending the difference.

“What’s the Ascension Project?” Jenkins asked.

God dammit. He hadn’t even noticed that Ariana had slipped. Just when his work molding Jenkins was starting to bear fruit, too. Paul sighed for a moment and moved in to salvage the situation.

“Something you don’t have the clearance level to know about. Something Ariana knows better than to casually name drop, too.” Paul said, with a clear warning in his tone.

“Is that where you got your powers from?” Jenkins asked, clearly not getting the hint.

“No, we were born with those, all you need to know is they were trying to make more of us powerful, and that evil project was destroyed long enough ago that it's history best left buried.” Ariana said.

“Is that why you call each other siblings even though your last names are different?” Jenkins asked.

“You ask too many questions, Preston. This is the last thing I will say on the topic. We are half siblings, same mother different fathers. Now kindly shut up, I hate this topic and frankly, no matter how curious you feel, you don’t need to know. Boundaries, respect them.” Ariana said, poking Jenkins in the chest, hard enough to push him backwards.

“Plus, if we did tell you any more, then we'd have to kill you.” Paul added. “Trust me when I tell you this, we are doing you a favor. Now drop the subject, I mean it.”

“You’re joking, right?” Jenkins said, his face pale.

“It’s classified level omega, which carries a sentence of summary execution for breaking secrecy.” Paul said with a dangerous look in his eyes. He then lifted Jenkins off the ground with a TK field and dragged him right into his awaiting hand which grasped him by the front of his BDU’s as the field dropped. Paul smiled, enjoying the look of fear in Jenkin’s eyes. A buzzing sensation of pleasure filled Paul's mind, intoxicating him.

“You know enough right this moment already that all of our lives would be forfeit if word of what you know somehow were to spread. So, you tell me, do you think I am joking?”

Jenkins gulped and shook his head.

“Good. Make sure you remember that before you start thinking that we are friends or that either of us would lose a single night of sleep over your untimely death. There are plenty of black sites out there that you can disappear into if we aren’t merciful enough to grant you a quick death before the hood goes over your head.”

Paul released his hold and Jenkins crumbled to the ground looking terrified. Paul had made his point; it was time to pull the poor kid back from the brink. “Now, let’s head to the training room, since we have some time. We all have some steam to burn off, don’t we?”

Jenkins followed meekly behind them, mercifully quiet for once. Paul smiled, hoping the lesson would stick. If he wanted to continue to follow his lead, the whimpering wreck still clearly had a lot of toughening up to do, and they had limited time in which to do so. One thing was for sure, even now, the kid was not ready for combat.