《Gerald the Dungeon Companion》Ah bisto!
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Whilst rubbing his face in conjunction with blinking away the amniotic gunk, Gerald decided he has had enough of being randomly and brutally murdered for a while.
It was tough being a fairy-sized being in a world where nearly every critter considers that to be just the perfect portion for a quick snack.
Hello mister Gerald, Silky’s managed to make some of the things you want.
“Gi’ us a sec kiddo, dinnae you ken I’m a wee bit busy here lass?” he shot back knowing that he had sounded more grumpy than he should have.
He was well aware that Silky was just trying to be helpful, but currently he was still tipping out of the fruit whilst lying with his back on the mushroom covered floor. All the while his legs were still bundled up inside the punctured and quickly deflating fruit. He was absolutely covered in the fruity pulp and even thou his body was fresh, his mind was tired and he was fed up.
Silky only waited in silence whilst floating behind him, as the little brown fairy lay there blinking up at the ceiling with its mind-bending and trippy light display being cast upon it from the mushrooms-trees nearby.
Accompanying the two were the sounds of straining and groaning fungal flesh as the forest continued to grow and compete against each other around them.
After a few moments more, Gerald released an exasperated sigh before lifting himself off the ground by his elbows.
It was time to get back some semblance of dignity.
He then pulled out his folded legs from the rapidly deflating and rotting fruit before quickly standing up. From his vast experience, it was markedly easier to remove the slimy coating off of himself with the aid of gravity. Even as sticky and viscous a substance as it was, the slime did generally gloop downwards slowly.
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He started by shaking his head whilst vigorously rubbing with his hands before picking his ears and blowing his nose. Then he shook his arms before slowly sliding his hands downwards from his neck as he wiped himself down.
If only I have myself something ta soak up all ta shite, he thought to himself as he reached down to wipe his unmentionable areas that harboured some hard-to-reach patches of slime before turning around.
Awaiting him was his trusty distiller along with Silky, who floated above a white blanket that sat atop a thick and rough-looking mattress. Beside this bedding was half a dozen jars of golden cider along with a few slabs of jerky and even as he watched on, another glass jar begun to materialise itself upwards from the dirt floor.
After having lived a rough life for so long, it was quite the welcoming sight to Gerald. But before happiness and blissful thoughts blanketed him in a warm fuzzy feeling, a spark of inspiration struck like a bolt of mage-fire.
This is going ta change everythin! He thought happily.
“Hey kiddo?” he asked furtively. For he was afraid that by voicing it, he was somehow going to scare of an idea.
Yes mister Gerald?
“Ya mind making me up some more o’ them blankets.. but a wee bit smaller?”
Uhh.. ok? It shouldn’t be a problem mister Gerald.
…
He had never in his long life felt such cleanliness before. So free of grime and the blighted wet, cold and bloody annoying slime!
Who knew that by using a proper towel to clean up, it would make what had been such a chore before turn into something so easy.
For laying on the floor around Gerald was a pile of dirty towels that lay crumpled and slightly slimy.
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He had once tried to clean himself with strips of cloth he had scavenged off a dead Fantimal questing-cleric after he had refruited, but it was hard to keep a stock of clean linen when you lived as a hobo-hermit inside a death-trap of a dungeon. Hiring the services of a washer-woman or doing his own dirty laundry were both out of the question, so it was an endeavour that Gerald quickly abandoned.
But now that he had Silky to manufacture an infinite supply of towels, he would not have to wipe down his gunk with his bare hands anymore.
It was so much more efficient and the feeling of the coarse cloth on his freshly fruited skin felt so nice that it left Gerald slightly flushed and euphoric.
Standing there whilst feeling truly clean and free for the first time in many years, Gerald once again noticed the welcoming bedding that sat waiting for him just a few steps away.
So without a second thought, he then walked across the few steps before flopping down and quickly wrapping himself.
Feeling safe and clean but yet unbelievably tired from the fast pace of recent events, quickly sent the old fairy into a blissful sleep.
…
Silky was left all alone wondering what to do as Gerald quickly began to snore before letting out a rogue, squeaky and tepid fart.
Seeing that there was nothing to do with her companion who was currently out cold, she defaulted by going back to growing her home.
She did also spare a quick sliver of her attention towards her other friends that lived inside her dungeon.
To find that Jeff was currently still inside his nest with new friends with Lorry doing just the same.
Although Jeff’s new friends were all so small in little round balls whilst Lorry’s friends were already walking around the place as exact little copies of him.
She was just glad that they were getting along whilst playing and having fun.
What she was worried about was her new lonely friend. All by himself just sitting all alone by her dungeon entrance. It was mean what Mister Gerald had done to him before.
Speaking of which, she should give this new friend a name.
Maybe Jeeb? Or Donga? Doob-deebah? Nah Jeremy... Jeremy sounds perfect!
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