The officers slew the Space Pirate Captain, an act which brought the law down on them. “First Beruvia, second the Tasgan Federation. Is there any country that welcomes you, Cadmos? Is it true that a hero is someone none are happy to see because his presence means calamity? Or are you too bland to be allowed to roam free? The boringness particles you emit spoil the taste of food, according to legend.”

“Look, Ulrik, we're getting along all right, but you'd better stop asking me questions like that. Lasva will think you're angling for her job. Let's go!” He hurled himself on the line of Tasgan Soldiers and tested his two swords against their double swords while Sindze compared her bow to the exotic crossbows of the Tasgan Archers that appeared to be three crossbows duct-taped together.

Ulrik and Local Fisher followed, and patriotism did not stay Vinnette Melban's caduceus. She was the social and political superior of common troops anyway.

“Princess Melban. What crimes did Cadmos commit this time?”

“Um . . . ranking too low in popularity polls?”

“Ouch!”

“I'm sorry!”

Cadmos laughed. “I know, I know. I didn't do all that well out of the launch crew, and it's worse now. I'll just have to try harder in the future.”

“What does trying harder mean?” Ulrik grabbed a crossbow from a Quake Tasgan Archer, killed the owner, and began taping it to three he had collected earlier to create the unprecedented dozenbow. “Say something that makes sense. What are you going to do? Alter your design to be less boring through pure will? Insert yourself into more event scripts? Though the opposite might help more.”

“You think so?”

“Yeah. Yes. I said that for no reason in imitation of you, but my brain has decided it's true. Half of these events have you show up somewhere and watch other characters solve problems that have nothing to do with you. You look ineffective. Who likes spectators?”

“That's right. Spectators are there to like things, not be liked. Clap when I reel in a big one, that's their job. It's the same as when I was watching officers go in and out of idle mode. That just isn't enough for me.”

Vinnette Melban patted Local Fisher's shoulder after finding a rock to stand on while Cadmos considered the situation. “You might have really hit on something there. That's up to the writers though. All I can do is the same thing as you.”

“What have you heard? I did nothing. You'll never catch me! Sindze made me do it.”

“Hey!”

“Should I tell Sibyl about your guilty conscience? I'll mull that over later.” Cadmos winked. “I only meant getting out into different modes and trying new things. Fighting more and talking to people. We might not have the best designs or roles, but that doesn't mean we have to give up.”

“Is that all? Er, yeah, that's all. We've been doing. Those things only.”

Ulrik backed up to try out his dozenbow, missing every bolt. Vinnette tiptoed over and whispered, “You look shaken . . .”

“Princess Melban. Cadmos told me he and I are not so different. I had no plausible rejoinder I felt secure in making. This is the worst day of my career.”

“There, there.” Vinnette patted him on the shoulder. Comforted, he took up his dozenbow and missed again. Then he threw it at a Soldier and knocked him over, which cheered up him and Vinnette both.

Slews of Tasgans succumbed, both the fiery sword guys and the earthy bow guys. “I brought this up before only to insult you,” Ulrik admitted. “It backfired and caused genuine curiosity. Why were you in trouble this time?”

“Oh, with the Tasgan Federation? Let's see. Some of the Federation's members had been negotiating with Morado Ven.”

“Not me!”

“Not Melban, no. Arvenne, for one. Hilliarde suspected an invasion from Kamdl was coming and wanted naval support. When I ruined those plans, his faction was upset and figured me for a Kamdl agent.”

“Are you?”

“Wait for Part Three! Heh. Not as far as I know. What ended up happening was that Hilliarde Feablas arranged a meeting and offered to assist me if I fought back the Kamdlians or to arrest me if I didn't.”

“Pretty confident considering how many of these guys we've killed. Did you tell him that? Would it be crass? Tasgans can be touchy.”

“Don't say that to Duchess Enk,” Vinnette informed Local Fisher while giggling.

“Is she an officer? I don't want to step on any toes.”

“Well, it isn't our Vinvin, and it isn't Hilliarde OPblas, who's a prince by the way, and that leaves Darlotte Glofal. Maybe?” Vinnette's nod confirmed Sindze's suggestion.

“Oh, her. She's the one I was thinking of. I don't talk to Hilliarde that often. Cadmos, is he touchy?”

“Here? Absolutely. In Freegate? Not in the least. If Poll of the Day ever ran one about which officers are the friendliest compared to what you'd expect from their story appearances, I bet either Hilliarde or Advas would take it.”

“Who?”

“Sorry, Count Poitnem.”

“Really now. As long as the gossip's going, what about the opposite? Who's way meaner than they're supposed to be? ”

“Hm. I've never considered that, Sindze. I'll get back to you if I come up with an answer,” Cadmos said, avoiding eye contact with her.