I… uh… I do not know….

A-anyway, about my character, I used to play as a warrior that focused too much on my HP. I have to say that playing as a paladin was kinda… eye opening? I mean, defenses are not just about HP, but also armour value, magic resistance, and the groups defences overall. The last point was the reason I took guardian paladin and focused on Safeguard and Devotion.

I was supposed to protect the group… but, I….

B-back to the topic. Actually I’ve prepared the Dusbreaker armour set that I prepared before I reset my character which I will pick later as soon as I reach level 80. I also picked the wings as special equipment instead of flying shields because in a way I still could use my wings to parry attacks and it increases my mobility. As a guardian paladin, I am supposed to be able to move swiftly to cover for my team. Yes, it is my job to protect my team, not to break them. Not to….

Regarding my custom ability, [Stardust Lancer] is definitely my main crowd control ability with some heal for my team. To heal them, not to hurt them. [Soul-saving Arc]... ah, yes, this was designed as it is because guardian paladins are often bad at dealing with projectiles. I took inspiration from a dwarven priest for this. Further, this is supposed to be used to protect the teammates behind me. Yes…, supposedly. I should not be used to protecting myself when I am doing some atrocities.

I was thinking of something cool to balance out the miniscule burst damage output of a guardian paladin when I designed both [Sanctity Edge] and [You Will Pay for Your Transgression]. The idea was, if I am able to take down one or two opponents before I get taken down, that would be wonderful for my teammates. If only it was not used to crush the trust of someone I started to care about.

While [Sanctity Edge]’s final damage relies on my capabilities to parry attacks, the other one relies on my being low in HP. When I think about it again, it really does centre on me. Was protecting others just my facade of getting myself safe. Am I really that selfish? Perhaps Pitoy was right that I am less than even just a pretty face.

C-continuing on. I spent two of my custom abilities for the passive ones. [Dragonheart Seal] increases my defence related stats inversely proportional to the level of my remaining HP. With this, I supposedly would last longer in tough fights and the healers would have an easier time to keep me in optimal condition. They will not heal me to maximum HP every single time. Half would be sufficient.

Finally, [Steadfast] increases my MP regeneration when I receive major damage or being affected by a minor crowd control effect. One of the main inspirations for this was Tier when I realised how dangerous staggering effects are from something like [Mimic: Rhino]. I am not allowed to increase the resistance to crowd control effect furthermore, thus I choose to give myself regeneration instead. At least I would be able to cast something to reduce the effect.

Funnily enough, I finally faced how intimidating such an effect is. [Mimic: Rhino] was an ability to reckon with. But what was more frightening was Tier’s eyes. I… have disappointed him.

Among that smile and stern outlook, I never knew about his fragility. And I might have taken advantage of his kindness. It is natural for him to hate me. Perhaps, I have no redeeming quality, not as a person nor as a guardian paladin.

You know, I still have one more slot for my custom ability. I can not really think straight right now.

D-despite that… maybe I need to really be more selfless. If only I could be a sanctuary for those around me… and of course for him.

~AVK~