《Deep In The Heart》Chapter 40: Jihad (September 23 Part 2)
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“Zoe? Is that you?” She asks me weakly.
“Yonca, I’m so sorry,” I plead to her. “I didn’t know it was you!”
She shakes her head. “No, Zoe… I should be apologizing to you,” she says in between labored breaths. “Everything that Ashley said about me is true… I’m an utter coward. I abandoned you when you needed me…”
I shake my head back at her, tears forming in my eyes. “No… I just killed you… you didn’t deserve that!” I say. “I… don’t want to fight anymore! I just want to leave this place!”
“Don’t feel too bad, Zoe,” she says, managing to smile at me. “I’ve been killed plenty of times already, and I always come back. You did put a dent in my KD ratio, though…”
HUH?
Right in front of me, Yonca’s eyes close for the last time… and then, her body slowly dissolves into a misty, white substance, which then disperses into the air and becomes transparent.
I sit there for a moment, dumbstruck by what she just said to me. Does that mean… I didn’t kill her, then?
And then, something else unexpected happens. I’m surrounded with a sudden beam of light. When I re-emerge, I’m back in my regular Persona outfit.
My brain is swimming with confused thoughts. I suppose if the animals we met on the way here aren’t real, it stands to reason that the people in here may not be real either. I suddenly feel very silly for getting so upset… But then, why did my clothes just change? That doesn’t make any sense at all. And why did Yonca appear here, then? If this version of her isn’t real, did she mean what she said?
Even if it wasn’t real, I still feel rather upset from the trauma of believing I had killed one of my friends. I climb back behind my dumpster for a few more minutes to sort out my feelings.
I manage to reach the freeway that cuts through town after carefully moving between places of cover. I slowly make my way past the wall of the overpass, using the shadow to veil myself from any enemies who may wander past. Then, I peak around the corner, and see a figure in the distance. Hey, wait a minute, I know who that is…
I put my hands up to signify peace and step out into the open.
Nova, predictably, jumps a foot in the air upon seeing me, and aims straight at my head.
“Don’t shoot! It’s me!” I say quickly.
“Oh… hey, Ashley,” he says, dropping his weapon with relief. “Hey… what the fuck is going on here?”
“I’m not entirely sure either,” I admit. “This is certainly not what I was expecting.”
“Yeah, no shit!” he says. “This is nothing like Pavia’s palace!”
“My best guess is that it’s some sort of weird entrance exam,” I tell him. “Remember how in Pavia’s palace, there was that first room which made us go crazy? This may be something like that.”
“This is way more elaborate than that, though,” he observes. “It’s more like when you’re playing a game, you walk into a level, and then suddenly you’re playing this unexpected mini game which is a completely different genre than the rest of the game.”
“If that’s how you want to think about it, whatever,” I say. “Anyways, have you noticed any patterns in this place?”
“Well, not yet. I do know what if we die here, we just kinda… respawn.”
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“’Respawn,’ huh?”
“Yeah. I got snuck up on by some bitch, and then I reappeared somewhere else.”
“Hmm. Interesting,” I say. I’ve been acting extremely carefully up to this point, but this knowledge sort of lowers the tension a bit. “Anyways, let’s try and round up the rest of the group and figure this out,” I tell him.
“Aight. Let’s go,” he agrees.
Travelling in a group of three is much easier. With Ted and Cedric covering my flanks, we’re able to get rid of the next few enemies we run into without any fear of being snuck up on. Still, travelling through this mostly wide-open town makes me a little paranoid. All it’d take to break up our group is one very skilled sniper. I wish that we had more cover.
We’re eventually able to fight our way to the area where the soccer fields are. There, under the pavilion, I see another group of three, who seem to be talking to one other. There are two who are in the regular enemy uniforms, but there’s one who must be some sort of leader. He’s wearing an all-black uniform with a cap and a heavy-looking robe down to the knees. There’s also something about his form and body language that’s familiar to me…
“I see what you’re seeing, Anja,” Ted says behind me. “Seems like a great opportunity to get the jump on ‘em.”
“No… hold on,” I say. “I think the one in black is my dad…”
“Your dad?” Cedric asks quizzically. “How can that be?”
“Idk… just don’t fire immediately,” I say.
I slowly step towards the pavilion, trying not to appear threatening. “Dad? Is that you?” I call out to him.
All three of the soldiers turn their guns towards me… but then, Dad holds out his arms. “Hold your fire!” He orders the other two.
I gesture for the other two to follow me, and then jog the rest of the way to the pavilion.
“Anja… how on earth did we end up on opposite sides of this war?” Dad asks me as I reach the pavilion myself.
“I have no clue, man… Honestly, I don’t even know what we’re fighting about at all,” I say, shrugging.
“Are you sure these are our allies?” Cedric asks me, him and Ted having just caught up, the former still holding up his weapon uncertainly. “They’re dressed in the clothes in the enemy.”
“Whatever. I’m not fighting my own dad!” I say decisively.
Ted nods. “Okay. Then I won’t fight either,” he says.
Then, something strange happens… I shed my military clothes and end up back in my typical Persona outfit. I turn back to Ted to see that he, too, has transformed back to his normal armadillo form, which earns a confounded look from Cedric.
“Wow… so he really was an armadillo,” he says.
“You’ve made some pretty interesting friends there, Anja,” Dad tells me, which puts a smile on my face.
“As have you,” I say, looking towards the two others in his squad, a rather large Latino man and a very scared-looking African-American boy about my age. The second one catches my eye, because he has bright, green eyes that are unusual for a person of color.
“Anyways… it looks like you have your own mission to attend to,” Dad tells me. “Stay safe out there. And make sure you’re home for dinner!”
“Oh, don’t worry Dad, this won’t take any time at all,” I assure him, giving him one last hug before our two squads depart in different directions.
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Nova and I wander around for a little while, not talking much and focusing on not being ambushed. Eventually, we come across an odd part of town that I don’t think I’ve ever been to before.
“Hmm… maybe we should turn around,” I tell him. “I think we may be reaching the city limits.”
“Yeah, maybe… Hey Ashley! Look!”
I whirl my head around in the direction he’s pointing, and my heart is flooded with relief upon seeing that it’s Zoe, who’s running towards us from some generic building nearby.
She runs straight up to me and wraps her arms around me. I gladly return the hug.
“Ashley… I’m so glad to see you!” she tells me, her voice breaking. “This place is so weird…”
“I’m glad to see you too,” I tell her.
We break apart, and I notice something odd… she’s in her Persona clothes, instead of a military uniform like everyone else.
“How are you back in your regular clothes?” I ask her.
She frowns. “I don’t know…” Suddenly, her eyes light up. “Ashley, you won’t believe it- I saw Yonca!
“What? You saw Yonca?” I ask. “Why the hell is she here? Her house wasn’t one of the ones linked to the church.”
“I don’t know, Ashley. I… I shot her… I felt horrible about it, but I think she’s okay? I’m really confused, though…”
“HIT THE DECK!” Nova suddenly yells.
I turn my head and see a couple of people in the opposing colors coming towards us from a nearby field. The three of us quickly scramble behind a wooden fence nearby for cover.
Unfortunately, we’re not quite quick enough to evade being seen, and the enemies start trying to shoot us through the fence. I try to send some bullets back at them, but it’s really hard to aim and dodge incoming fire at the same time.
“Crap! This is not good!” Nova stresses, trying to make himself as small as possible. “Zoe… since you still have your Persona, is there anything you can do?”
“Nothing we do here is really going to cause anyone to die, right?” Zoe asks, frightened.
“No! Nobody’s going to die!” Nova assures her frantically. “I literally died earlier and I just popped up again somewhere else! Death has no consequence! But it’d still be pretty inconvenient if it happened to us, so…”
Zoe grimaces, stands over the fence, and fires her nuclear magic attack towards the two enemies. It’s a direct hit, and the two get utterly evaporated, leaving us alone once again.
Nova hears the noise, and then peaks around the fence to see what had happened. “Wow… I guess that’s what happens when you bring a gun to an atom bomb fight,” he comments, his body uncurling with relief.
“Well, magic attacks seem to be pretty effective against these soldiers,” I say. “Nova and I need to figure out if we can regain access to those…”
“Yeah, I want my hammer back!” Nova gripes.
Zoe, however, still looks a little bit uncomfortable. “Even if it’s all an illusion… it feels weird to be attacking other humans,” she admits.
“Well, you’re going to have to get over that pretty quickly,” I tell her bluntly. “Just remind yourself that this is all cognitive. We’re not attacking other people; we’re only attacking ideas.”
“Okay… I’ll try to remember that,” Zoe says, though she’s still grimacing a little bit.
“Anyways, let’s go and find our final two members,” I order, getting to my feet. The other two nod, and we start heading back into town.
Thankfully, we find Anja and Ted before too long. Like Zoe, they’re somehow still in their Persona outfits. They’re also joined by some blonde man. I don’t recognize him, but something about him makes me feel a little annoyed for some reason…
“Hey everyone!” Anja greets us. “Excellent. We’ve got the whole band back together!”
“And who is this supposed to be?” I inquire, looking at the blonde man.
“Um… my name’s Cedric,” he tells me uncertainly.
“He’s a stray we picked up on the way,” Anja tells me.
“Alright then. Next question: How do you guys still have access to your Personas?” I ask.
“It just sorta happened,” Anja explains, shrugging. “I ran into my old man, and refused to fight him, and then I got my magic back. Same thing with Ted.”
Zoe gasps, seemingly having a realization. “Ashley… that reminds me of something! I got mine back after I told Yonca I didn’t want to fight anymore!” she explains.
“Hmm… that’s interesting,” I say. “So all of you got them back after saying that you didn’t want to fight?”
“Sounds like it,” Anja says.
The apparent pattern here makes me want to try something. “I, Ashley Davis, no longer wish to fight in the war,” I declare.
It works. Within seconds, I’m back in my suit of armor, my gun being swapped for the usual sword.
“Uh… ditto,” Nova says, and the same thing happens to him.
“Alright! I’m so ready for us to begin our new lives as draft-dodgers!” Anja jokes excitedly.
“Okay… with that over with, we need to figure out what the deal with this palace is,” Nova says seriously.
“Yeah, I really don’t get what’s going on here,” Anja agrees. “I don’t understand why the hell my dad is here, of all people.”
I think about this for a moment. This palace represents the group cognition of our church… but people from outside the church are showing up too. And they’re showing up as enemies, from what I can gather… This gives me an idea.
“Hmm… your dad works as a shrink, right?” I ask Anja.
“If you mean a psychiatrist, yes.”
“And he’s not really the religious type?”
“Nope. He was ‘raised Catholic,’ as they say.”
I gesture at Zoe. “Well, she also ran into someone she knows here… Yonca Marangoz, from our school.”
“Oh, the Turkish girl? That’s interesting.”
“Yeah, it is. And I think I have a theory as to what’s going on here.”
“Well, you’d probably know better than me.”
“I think that… the people who we’re seeing here in the yellow uniforms are people who the church views as their enemies, or people who don’t fit into their world. For example, Yonca appears on the opposing side because she’s a Muslim.”
I let this idea settle for a few seconds. Nova looks particularly alarmed by this, for whatever reason.
“But then, why is my dad here?” Anja asks, shaking her head. “He may not be personally religious, but he also doesn’t exactly go around burning churches and punching every Christian he sees on the street.”
“Well… our church doesn’t really seem to be too fond of the mental healthcare profession,” I explain to her. “A little something I picked up during my few years of going.”
Anja face palms with both hands. “Oh my god, you have to be kidding me. Just when I thought this place couldn’t get any stupider!” She looks back at me with fury on her face. “Okay, I’m mad now. Let’s go plow some asses!”
“Hold on a second,” Nova interjects. “If the enemies are the people on the ‘other team,’ then why are all of us not counted as enemies?” He starts pacing a few steps back and forth. “Anja and I don’t go to your church. Your parents got kicked out. Zoe is… well, you know. And Ted… exists… uh…”
He stops pacing. “I lost my train of thought.”
“Here, I’ll help you out,” Anja says. “I think I know what you’re saying. The five of us must be exceptions since we entered this place through the portal in the church. Like, the palace assumes that we’re people who go there because that’s where we entered or something.”
“Hmm… that would explain why we got our forms back after refusing to fight,” Zoe says in agreement.
Ted clears his throat. “This place we’re in… it’s a replica of your town, correct?” he asks the group at large.
“Yep. Down to the last detail,” I say. “It’s honestly kind of eerie.”
“If I had to make my own guess… we should make our way back to where the church is in the town,” he says. “There, I expect that we’ll find the real palace.”
“Yeah, that makes sense to me,” Anja agrees. “It’s at least worth a shot. Hehe, get it. Shot. Because we all have guns.”
“We don’t have guns anymore, though!” Nova reprimands her. “You should’ve made that pun a few minutes ago when we did.”
“Well, Zoe, Ted, and I still have guns, but I get your point,” Anja concedes. Then, her face suddenly breaks into a mischievous grin. “Oh, I just remembered something I need to tell you! Before Ted got his Persona back, I saw his human form!”
“Wait, really?” Nova asks. “What did he look like?”
“He was this huge man, over six feet tall, who had big muscles and a burly moustache,” Anja explains.
“Yeah, it was nice not to be treated like a little animal for a few minutes,” Ted comments with a touch of bitterness in his voice.
“Don’t be too disappointed,” I assure him. “At least you have your badass fire magic back now.”
“I didn’t realize that Ted had a human form,” Zoe says, her eyes wide.
“Well, he did say when we first met that he used to be human,” I explain. “Speaking of Personas… Zoe, I never really got to tell you this, but I think your Persona’s outfit looks really good on you.”
She grins at me and blushes. “Oh, um… thank you! Yours is really… imposing as well.”
“Yeah, kind of looks like Cleopatra to me,” Anja comments. “Hey, wait a minute… if Zoe is wearing Cleopatra’s outfit, wouldn’t that technically be cultural appropriation? You know, since she was Egyptian, and…”
“Who cares?” I cut her off, rolling my eyes that she’d bring up something pedantic like that. “Look, chatting has been fun, but I think we should quit wasting time and head to the church.”
“Um… I guess I might as well go with you guys,” the man named Cedric says. All the rest of our heads turn towards him- personally, I had totally forgotten he was there. “It’s only a matter of time before everyone finds out that I’m secretly in love with another man… and if what you say about this place is true, that means I’ll be considered one of the enemies once the cat’s out of the bag.”
“We’re glad to have you along!” Anja says, grinning at him. “All manner of gays and weirdos are welcome in our group.”
“Alright, I guess you can come too,” I say. “Let’s get moving already.”
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