“The Dwarves are really funny, where you come from.” Foxy said after she finally managed to catch a lungful of air “Or you have read some really weird books. I don’t even know, where to start!”

“The alcoholism!” Mini interjected, still with tears in her eyes after all that laughing “They are totally incapable of holding their booze. I once saw a twelve-years-old drink a whole company of Surface Infantry under the table. One after another. Drinking some low-grade piss that was sold as light beer.” She started laughing again.

“Yes, and beards…” Foxy took over “Not only they have no beards, they have no hair whatsoever!”

“Oh, don’t forget the deviants!” Mini could keep the laughing under control for a few seconds.

“Yes, thank, you. There are a few deviants, who got kicked out from under the mountains, and for some reason, they get false beards and horned helmets, and start calling themselves funny names.”

“Hehehe, I once met one with the name Blondie Wallsmelter-Stonesmith. Had a beard long enough that it stepped on it every other step. Tried to drink too, but the bartender just gave her juice. It still got drunk, because the juice was old and started to ferment. It was hilarious!”

“It? Isn’t that a bit insensitive?” Prof could finally get a few words in.

“No. You see, Dwarves have no gender at all. As far as I know, they are grown in vats. The current theory is, that they were made by one of the precursor races as cheap working force, and got left behind, when their masters died out.”

“Yeah, my Duke once sent me over there to secure a shipping order, and wanted to see the vats myself, but no, those little buggers are very tight-lipped when it comes to their breeding and history. Even the deviants. They are no fun at all!”

“As for names, they probably heard about having one is a good thing, and started to implement it in the past. However, they missed the point, so normal Dwarves have a name consisting of their occupation and some letters and numbers.”

“Ok, I got it, but please tell me, their warriors use hammers and axes!” Prof was pleading at this point. His whole childhood and ideals about true Dwarves were crushed excessive cruelly.

“Why would they?” Both women answered at the same time. Foxy deferred to Mini in the regard

“Surface Infantry is exclusively heavy troops with long pikes. They almost never break, have seen them a few times. Farming Militia mostly uses farming implements, and Internal Security the classic sword-and-board.”

“What about smithing? Are they at least legendary smiths and stuff?”

“Not really. They are good with stone, and have techniques for the more rare metals, but on average, they are no better than other species. If you want to buy really good stuff, stay with Elven-made.”

“Actually…” Mini interjected “There are a few smiths in Forestdeep, that are even better than Elves. Most are undead, of course, and been that for a long time. And I heard, the Greenskins have good smiths too. But Dwarves? Not particularly.”

During the conversation, they progressed a little slower than before with Shinead, but they still had time for a run in the dungeon. During setting camp – which, in truth, consisted only of dumping their belongings in a pile and preparing the firewood – Mini changed clothes. Her new outfit consisted of thigh-high fiery red boots, green shorts (or rather hot pants) and a light, lemon-yellow shirt (which was translucent to begin with and Mini only buttoned the middle three buttons) on which she put her leather jacket.

All this was accompanied by fine leather gloves and a knitted bonnet with a tassel on top. Foxy just shook her head, and Prof worked hard not to stare at the sight. The final effect, with a sword (or rather a sabre), dagger and a quiver for crossbow bolt at her hips was interesting, and as soon as Mini noticed that Prof was looking, she took her double-grooved crossbow in hand and began to take on sexy poses with a wink. Foxy snorted.

After Prof quickly summed up once more what to expect, they left their stuff with Mini’s mount, and entered the dungeon. They thwarted the rabbits’ charge without any problems, Foxy skewered them with her strange blades, and Mini didn’t even bothered with the crossbow, but kicked her victim against the wall, and then began to jump on the stunned rabbit.

It wouldn’t have been the most effective method of killing critters. If she had to face multiple opponents, it probably wouldn’t have worked, but the result was as expected: they got a flattened, trampled vaguely rabbit-shaped carcass.

In the second room, the giant rat was not resting on the rock this time, but was hiding next to one of the walls, but as soon as it moved, Mini’s two crossbow bolts were already flying towards it. Foxy started collecting the drunken moss right after the rat died, and Prof started processing the rat. What else could have Mini done as pulling off her gloves and grabbing into the moss before anyone could warn her. After a few grabs, she stood up in frustration.

“What a pity, the poison isn’t high enough in level, I barely feel anything.” her eyes shone a bit more, but based on how fast Prof got stiff drunk, Mini’s higher Health and Poison Resistance was a huge boon. Probably liquid panty remover did not have any effect on her either. Not like anyone needed that with a nymphomaniac. Ignoring the little fact that Mini didn't wear panties…

The third room was a little harder with the vines, because only Prof could stretch and cut them with ease. The women had to get hold of them with their the hands, causing Foxy’s fur to stick together and her movement to slow down.

“It has a paralyzing effect!” Prof warned the others again.

Mini just shrugged, this poison didn't affect her either. After a long time doing gardening, finally the last vine fell to their feet. The division of labor still worked: Foxy gathered the usable, longer vines, Prof searched the scenic corpse along the wall, and Mini… Did poses.

The loot this time was four and a half silver, an ornate copper belt buckle, one simple knuckles, and three armor-piercing arrowheads, far less than Prof had found in the first run. Prof assumed the loot handed out by the dungeon was related to the level of the party. It was interesting too, that the dungeon dropped Bergian coins, not Elven ones. Asking the women, they just shrugged: The behaviour of dungeons was a similar mystery as Leveling.

After a short break, they entered the mushroom room. Mini let her arrows fly into the mushroomed pig, and Foxy tried to cast a vine-trap – but the spell fizzled. Prof caught the first charge of the pig, and in the second one Foxy's spell finally worked, so Prof could easily execute the piggy. With the looting done, they decided to defeat the raccoon too, the difficulty of the dungeon with three people was not too great.

The tactics used against the boar were used again: Mini fired, Foxy tried to cast a spell (and again, it didn't work), while Prof went into melee.

“Prof! Let it climb onto your head!” Foxy shouted. “I can hit it more easily there!”

Prof waited for the next attack and let the teddy bear run up his back. Foxy was right there and cut off the bear's head with a lightning-fast combination!

“What was that?” wondered Prof.

“Battle Chi” Mini replied instead of Foxy. “Niiiiiceee! I want the fur!” She added after a short thought.

Prof hoped, he was able to skin it. In the first room he only got two of the five rabbit pelts in a useable condition. While Foxy collected the herbs and Mini did poses, Prof skinned the raccoon carefully, concentrating especially hard – and he was surprised that he succeeded. He searched the room once more, but instead of the statue, he only found a silver ring with jewels.

On the way back, they made a detour to the crystal cavern, but again found only small ones. Prof was pretty much happy with the run: they finished with few problems and very quickly, even if the loot itself wasn’t huge. Counting the task the alchemist gave them and the things he collected above it, they gained fifteen to twenty silver per person - averaging about a thousand seven hundred Euros, while investing only two days!

On the other hand, his new and shiny bearskin-suba cost almost twice as much, even if he took the fur off the Dire Bear with his own hands. He remembered the prices of magical items made of higher quality material, a simple run in a dungeon wouldn’t even cover the monthly installment.

After dinner, Prof practiced the elf letters a bit, and hoped he could start learning the language in earnest in a day or two. He was about to schedule for to watch, when Mini told him that the lizard was perfectly suited as a guard, there was little that could approach them unnoticed, and it had pretty good combat values ​​anyway. Prof looked at Foxy questioningly, who nodded.

“A scorpionlizard is enough protection. If it doesn’t notice something or doesn’t scare it away, we won’t be able either. Besides, Mini’s mount is a Level 20 Elite, I doubt it would lose if we three all attacked it…”

Prof tried to settle comfortably on his bedroll, wondering if there were any instant luxury campgrounds in Arkadia that he had read about in several novels. There, you just had to pull out a stone from your pocket, and you got a holiday resort. He needed to get at least a tent. He was almost asleep when Mini snuggled under the blanket next to him.

“Hi! There were no chainy, and sexy parts in his dungeon! In other words, you have to perform now! Feel honored! Ohhhh… How big!”

Mini reached into Prof's pants with practiced hands, her surprise being the size he modified during character creation. Prof fled the bedroll almost in panic.

“Here? Now? So?” Because of his movement, his pants dropped down, which Mini considered as an invitation.

“Yes! Yes! Yes! Unpacked it’s even bigger!!! Prof, I feel like we're going to be really good friends!” Despite Prof's best efforts, Mini was starting to take off his underpants.

“Calm down, you two! If you want to mate, take a room!” Foxy snapped from across the fire. “It has been a long day, I want to sleep!”

Mini finally retired indignantly, winking at Prof for the last time. Prof really hoped Mini only wanted some casual entertainment and wasn’t moved by some twisted ideas. Somehow he didn’t want to move in with the vampire.

The next day the run back to the town was faster, Prof pushed the pace to give Mini as few opportunities as possible to “flirt”. This time, the vampire wore virtually only underwear – and her usual leather jacket – and gave Prof seductive glances, sometimes adjusting her breasts with theatrical movements.

Prof began to regret not listening to Foxy, but was willing to bet he wouldn't be able to get rid of the vampire anymore. He, on the other hand, had to admit that despite all her crazyness, was a good warrior – more than useful in any fight.