Omake 58: Fishing with Fiends (1)

Fishing is such a nice activity to entertain when you are quite powerful and in need of a soothing outlet away from the rest of the world.

It was somewhat more relaxing when a couple more ‘similar-minded’ fellows were brought to the occasion. Now, I could have brought so many interesting individuals for the quiet event, yet most were busy.

Only one answered the call… a call which I didn’t make as the man himself was not someone I knew about, nor I considered ‘similar-minded’ to me. If being inserted in Dio was already an anomaly, I could say that being inserted in Tom Riddle may or may not have been a terrible idea-

“It’s not Tommy-boy. It’s his Horcrux Diary,” ‘Tommy’ replied calmly, fixing his rod string, making sure the tool was ready for fishing duty. “Like, I spawned in the Diary, got my brain screwed a bit by the lingering sense of evil in it, killed Potty-boy for his Horcrux, then went on a journey to retrieve a couple more shards, solved the Balkan wars, retrieved Nagini and cured her of her curse before making her my first wife, and then I started to mess so hard with Dumbledore that I painted him as a Dark Lord, took over the Ministry and then proceeded to change things for good once Dumbles was taken out of the picture.”

…

“You really have no concept for half-measures, don’t you?” I inquired, and he grinned while still looking for any signs of fishes getting caught at his hook.

“That sounds like a boring idea. I mean, I have a family- a big one at that. You know, my oldest ones are already getting to the age where they will soon start to do accidental magic. I have to keep an eye on them until they get things under control- I can already imagine the pure chaos they are going to cause,” Tommy hummed in delight. “You have kids too, right?”

“I do-”

“And they are the best thing in the world. Like, the many adventures you can tell them, the many things you can do with them to foster the father-kids bond, and the dimensions you can destroy by causing nuclear annihilation-”

“What?” I blurted out in surprise, and the man chuckled.

“Oh, it happened just once, and it was a test to see if one of my apprentices could be really taught by me. Female Harry Potter corrupted by Horcrux, girl was quick on her feet and seemed to be happy enough she caused WW3 via bombing Privet Drive via Rhongomyniad Mini.”

“...I think some context is missing.”

He nodded. “It sure is.”

“You… have Rhongomyniad?”

“I had it around the time I also snatched a young Morgan from her Nasuverse parallel Dimension before she was married off to King Lot,” He admitted. “Morgan… she is such a lovely second-in-command. You would expect a witch like her to be a backstabber, but give her affection, attention, a cure to her father’s magi-genetical illness she inherited from him and she will be eager to be as tight and close as possible.”

I hummed, finally getting the hook thrown in the water. “That sounds like your bond with her goes beyond Master-Padawan.”

“Oh, I know what you are saying...” Tommy replied. “But the truth is that I did nothing to get her interested in that. I mean, I am not exactly a chaste man, but I didn’t exactly coax her into doing anything more but just do her job. I think she was just smitten by my handsome self-”

“Or perhaps saw your power and found it reasonable that two powerful beings would keep with each other,” I reasoned, and he gave a slow nod.

“That also makes sense.”

There wasn’t further talking for the remainder of the event. I ultimately decided to never mention how it went to the rest- what the rest of the world would know is that I went fishing alone. And yet, while that solved me this issue for a while, I was also dreading something that ‘Tommy’ told me about next time I went fishing.

He would bring a friend to tag along. He said that he was some sort of… demonic priest?

“Trust me, he is cool. In fact, he has two wives that love him and stuff like that.”

Why do I have a weird feeling someone wanted me to marry beyond Hannah?